Question for normies:
Am I a loser if I haven't had sex, let alone kissed a woman in 2.5 years? If I revealed that in a social setting, would others think poorly of me?
That depends. If you've been mourning a deceased loved one, certainly not. Likewise if you've been recovering from some severe trauma. If you've had other things on your mind, that's fine too.
If you're so scared of rejection that you refuse to approach women, well, that's another matter. But this is also fixable.
>If I revealed that in a social setting, would others think poorly of me?
Yes, but that's less because of your (lack of) sexual escapades, and more because it's not really appropriate to bring up in most social settings. That's a personal thing, best shared with a partner or a doctor. Or did you have some particular setting in mind?
>more because it's not really appropriate to bring up in most social settings
My friends talk about sex fairly casually when we get around to drink. Stuff like "Who was the last girl you hooked up with" questions are not out of the ordinary. Girls also ask this kind of shit sometimes. It's not like I willingly tell people about my sex life, but you would be surprised just how invasive a lot of people can be when it comes to this sort of stuff.
It helps to at least show you've tried to get on the horse again. Like actively trying to meet or date people. If you've been trying to no avail, at the very least people will be sympathetic.
Sorry, but as a woman, if I found out that a guy I was interested in hadn't even kissed someone in nearly 3 years, I would think something is very wrong with them. I'm not saying that's necessarily the case for you, but it's sort of instinctual for most women to be repelled by that. You naturally start thinking "Uh, why? There must be something wrong with this guy. I don't want to take a chance with that.". Again it's not even a conscious decision but an instinctual one. If I were you I'd try your best to keep it a secret.
Haven't gotten laid in almost two years myself, but this is only because I'm still hung up on an ex and I still have hope that one day we'll be together but obviously it's not going to happen. So I drink everyday and this has been going on for about a year and half ( I blame her for my relapse but fuck man). All I do is sit at home and drink. I wouldn't tell anyone though. Why would you share your sex life?
it depends on your definition of loser.
if its that others would think poorly of you, sure it makes you a loser. but almost anything yuo do will make a vast majority of people think poorly of you.
the thing id break it down to is this
>do you NEED those things (sex, kissing, etc)
>did you try to get those things?
>if so did you fail?
some people are celibate or simply dont mind waiting for the right connection. they arent losers. id say even if you tried and failed you arent a loser as long as you arent desperately traipsing from girl to girl jusdt trying to do it
You're pretty much only a loser if you let them know you care about it. I remember going into college a virgin (still am, btw) and people are generally really surprised when I tell them if it comes up because I carry myself confidently. It sucks to think about it and I wish I wasn't a virgin, but I don't make a big deal out of it so no one else does.
Not having sex in however long amount of ti.e doesn't make you a loser in almost anyone's eyes, but showing that you're insecure about it almost definitely will.
They were my only friends when growing up. One of them, the one that made the bulk of the wisecracks, helped while I was going through a crisis. He also said a lot of racist shit. If the shit hit the fan, I'd have either of their backs...and I really have no idea why.
sounds like you had shit friends growing up who you're still attached to because they're all you know
sometimes you need to find better friends than the ones you grew up with if it turns out they become real unsavory characters.