/Adv/ice I feel much more isolated as I get older and I'm not sure what to do about it. I try my best to go out, visit with existing friends, save money to do things (this is actually really hard in today's day and age)... but people are kinda off on their own private lives.
Most of my friends don't get along with each other. Most of my friends are paying off student debt, mortgages, wedding expenses, etc. = poor. It's already hard to meet people, but creating a group of people who like each other seems impossible.
Is that just the sad truth of growing up? No more "circle" of friends, just one-off friends and acquaintances? I miss adventure. I miss doing drugs with friends. I miss meeting new people just by being "out."
How the fuck do adults have fun? Vacations?
The sad truth isn't that creating the group is impossible. It's perfectly simple, in fact. The truth is that no one else is going to do it except you. Like you said, people are too busy with their own shit. You have to take complete charge of your social life if you want to have a good one. You have to set all the plans, meet all the people, make all of the decisions, etc.
Wow thank you for that because what you said didn't click until I read your post. It does get harder and I hadn't realized really why.
I do have to set all of the plans. I do have to be the organize if I want it to happen. In high school, people just new. Forced word of mouth through classes and grades. In college, people had classes together but also extra curricular groups that organized people - sports, frats, etc. Post graduation if a person gets into a large company, the other co workers and new analysts or what not serve as a buffer. The new city plus new co workers also can mix to make friends.
But if a person changes states for jobs after college or otherwise is isolated... the only groups of friends and contacts made are fragmented and splintered. Which means if I want anything to happen with anyone, I have to make it happen. No more automatic groups of people.... unless, by luck, I make friends with an existing group of people. Jesus just another thing to put work into if I want to make it happen.
But thank you.
Thanks. That truth makes me pretty sad because i think it means I won't really have a group of friends like that again except by luck. I've found it difficult to juggle a girlfriend/dating with work and just life stuff. Fitting just basic friends in is difficult. If I have to plan and execute everything to try and make a social circle... I just don't think I can do that.... which is why it makes sense social circles aren't forming anymore in adult hood.
So I guess if I see a good opportunity I'll jump on it... but I'm not very hopeful.