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Long story short, my ex hasn't messaged me for like 11 days.

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Long story short, my ex hasn't messaged me for like 11 days. We sort of were breaking up and arguing and shit, but when I was like maybe we should just give each other time rather than break up, hwt last words were "yeah maybe i'll call you". I definitely messaged after a few days of silence, saying "hey lets talk things out etc this is really hurtful" then waited a bit more than continued with similar messages and said I'm getting a little worried about, etc. I'm honestly pretty upset, for obvious reasons... and I know I should just "let it go" but I don't want to be left as the pathetic one who was semi-begging. I was thinking if I should just wait and give it time, or send one last message that says something like, "dang I should have assumed you were the childish one. have a good life, kid"
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>>16775903
Don't beg, but if she left it open like that and then can't even reply to a genuine question then she is an asshole who obviously doesn't care about you.

When you get dumped, your exes true colours get exposes, who they really are, and how they really treat someone they said they cared about.
>>
> or send one last message that says something like, "dang I should have assumed you were the childish one. have a good life, kid"

don't

you are the pathetic one and nothing you say will change that
>>
>>16775909
No I know.. it's just that it worked in the past... I might have conditioned this behavior in the past, thinking he was mature and responding after a few days and finally getting a reply and everything being cool for a bit (previously)...
>>
>>16775910
nothing? NADA? I could also just say, "hey this will be the last time i ever talk to you.. so i just wanted to say thanks for everything. have a good life, man"
or be a completely shit-meister and just say
"maybe we just had to be more honest with each other. maybe i felt like something was wrong because i was projecting on you. i was seeing someone else for a while and you ended up being my 2nd choice, everyone could tell i wasn't all that into it but i blinded myself to give you a shot because you seemed nice. and since the last few weeks, i was meeting up with someone else, because you started to treat me badly, and knowing this would end ... so i'm sorry. you have a good life.
>>
>>16775934

this urge to text him/her and come out on top will go away

it's not worth it imho

if you are someone like me who get obsessed about some things, you might say something and then later regret it and try to correct it

you won't reclaim your self worth by saying something imho
>>
>>16775974
alright... thanks you're right. I know me and I would feel guilty. A part of me feels that by showing i dont care or am "over it" my ex will come back. like, why say "yeah maybe, ill call you" if that's not the case? i didn't do anything bad like cheat or whatever. and there's been instances where i was mad and seemed like i was about to end it and i got a "lets talk in person" but this is just.. wtf
>>
I figured by acting like I was "done" it would help win the situation in my favor because it seems like (unfortunately) that's how people work...
>>
This happened to me. I could be like a lot of jackasses on adv who hijack threads to give a long story about their own past but I'll save it.

In short it hurts like fuck when it appears like you're the only one hurting. He could be too, or he might not be.

I'd suggest moving on, it fucking hurts and it'd going to be hard, but it sounds like the relationship is over now. Keep yourself busy, pick up a hobby to improve yourself.
>>
>>16776041
>this happened to me
what exactly happened to you? I actually want to know.
>>
>>16776041
I'm more mad about how things ended. He was so sorry and kind of begging a while ago when I was mad about stuff and seemed upset, then this last time he thought I was going to end things (because i said he's a good guy that deserves to be happy) but the doorbell rang, he then came back and was really angry and broke things off.
>>
You should say something that suggests you're over it, but don't say something you'll regret.
>>
Men have a huge ego to begin with, so telling him something like, "All along you weren't my first choice." could hurt him and make him think about you, but likely he won't come back or it'll be a back and fourth game.
>>
>>16776082
Okay, I'll explain.

>ex and I used to fight all the time
>got to a point where we "broke up" but we kept things really open to the and we said we'd review things after a small time away from each other
>same thing as you happened, I'd message and he wouldn't reply and I'd try to tone it down to not appear as though I'm begging
>he wouldn't respond or would respond very briefly telling me he needs more time
>i would start to move on and he'd suddenly come back and would talk for a bit to keep me interested and to keep things open, but never wanted to fully fix things
>this happened a few times until one night i called him up crying saying i couldn't do it anymore and he had to make a final decision
>"heh. My final answer is no, but you'll call me again, we can always talk about it down the line"
>decide there and then to cut him off forever, block him on all sites
>2 days later i met my now fiancé and couldn't be any happier

It's been years and he still pines over me apparently, he really didn't think I'd move on and has told people he regrets it really badly.

Closure is important so there's no harm in finally making him choose. You're not weak for doing so, if he doesn't respond it does not matter what he thinks after that, hes an ass and you'll know you need to move on.
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>>16776123
Holy shit what a good story. Well, it looks like it worked in your favor. Where/how did you fuckin meet your fiance 2 days later?
AND your story proves that the side that plays hard to get/doesn't show emotion wins... fuck. FUUCK. He knows I would do what I did. That's why I'm wondering how to do damage control, just end things and admit I did a lot of terrible things and block him, or just stop? I already sent like 5-8 texts.
>>
>>16776123
another thing is, the fact that he isn't telling me for sure "leave me alone" or "yes it's over" through text, but didn't block me either (i called him and it rang a few times, i think blocking makes it 1 ring and straight to voicemail) makes me think he's not ready to 100% yeah fuck off forever.... :(
he still has me on fb too... maybe i should post something to make him jealous

jesus fucking christ i hate how much of a baby a relationship can make people become (like me)
Thread posts: 16
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