> Date a girl for years
> Be head over heels in love
> Be convinced that she's the one
> Have plans to marry her, have kids with her
> Suddenly she begins drifting away
> Breaks up with me
> Try talking to her a few months later, she says she feels nothing at all for me anymore
> Fall into deep depression for two years
> Desperately try to get my life back together over the course of the next year
> Think I'm finally doing better
> Then one night, have stupid dream where I'm back together with her
> Not only are we back together but we've grown old together and are showing pictures of our life to our grandkids
> Wake up sobbing, feel empty and horrible and alone
Does this ever fucking end /adv/ or is the only way out a fucking bullet to the head
I'm so tired of being depressed and I want this to end
I think the problem is that you're a bit blind to reality, mate. You see, you have managed to convince yourself that you'll never do better than this girl and that this girl is perfection incarnate. You couldn't be more wrong.
Perhaps some other anon will be able to explain it to you but I assure you that it's all in your head.
That's making some pretty huge assumptions there
I don't think this girl was perfect, I never did, even while I was dating her
I even think on a rational level that she wasn't very good for me and in the end didn't really deserve me
Doesn't seem to have much impact on how I feel
Then what's up? If my theory is wrong, then what other void do you feel?
I'm trying to say that with what I said before it made sense that you felt like that but your reply makes me think that maybe the problem is elsewhere as opposed to not having moved on fron this girl?
I don't know man I fell into a depression after breaking up with her, recovered and then felt depressed again after having a dream about her, I think my problem is her, not anything else
I had a similar breakup with a girl. We'd dated for about 4 years and both had plans, but long story short, she wasn't sure how she felt. We both kind of mutually ended things; she wanted to because she thought she might not have feelings for me anymore, I wanted to because I didn't want to the same place you're in right now, OP.
There was a different girl I'd met and sort of "fell for" about a year beforehand, and I thought she might have felt the same about me, but I kind of just stopped talking to her once I met the breakup girl. Met up with this girl shortly after the breakup, and we met up. Long story short again, she had the same feelings as I did, and we started dating.
After a couple of months, things were literally picture perfect, except for one thing: I wasn't really over the breakup girl. I couldn't get her or our plans out of my head. I spent so long thinking she was the one, I just couldn't get over it. So I broke up with the new "perfect" girl and tried to rekindle things with the breakup girl. Got back together with breakup girl, and now things seem to be up and we sort of figured out what our problems were.
Unfortunately, the other girl seems to now be in your position. Even though we only dated briefly, she made her plans in her head, fell head over heels, blah blah blah. Feels bad because I sort of did the same with her, but I couldn't really continue with them.
The girl was already thin, but now she's under 90lbs (about 5'5''), constantly crying, texts and calls me from time to time to try to convince me, and just can't get over it.
I'm not sure what the cure is exactly, but I'll tell you the same I wish I could tell her: find something that means a lot to you. Another person, a hobby, a distracting job, just something. Filling a void, I guess, is how some people would put it, but I think I'd rather just call it moving on.
Honestly, I had a good relationship for a couple years. It's hard to keep a girl feeling the same for you for years, and it's hard to feel the same for them.
Just don't get into long term relationships. They are a pipe dream that fucks up one way or the other.
Look anon, I was you a year and a half ago.
I dated my best friend for 5 years, I loved her, and she cheated on me for 9 months, left me, and had a new, unrelated guy the next week.
It hurt for a long time, and it affected my health. It felt like I'd never get over it. But I did.
The important thing is to not trick yourself into thinking she's perfect, or irreplaceable, or the soul reason to go on living. You can't all your eggs into one basket, and you can't bet your whole life on a girl, no matter how much you love/loved her; and that goes for future relationships too.
Don't seclude yourself, don't stop living your life, don't sit on your ass and think about what was or could have been. You have to get out and find ways to occupy yourself. Try things you wouldn't normally do, even if it doesn't end up being your thing. Travel broadens the mind and new things put old things into perspective. A year later, I'm happier than I ever have been.
It's not easy, and it's a long process. But it absolutely gets better.
Thanks I suppose but I've tried pretty much everything in this thread really
I guess I'm just getting desperate, it felt so fucking horrible waking up after that and I am just so fucking tired of being sad and depressed, it just seemed so unfair to have really been trying to claw my way out of it and thinking I succeeded and then having that stupid dream that left me feeling worse than ever
I don't know hopefully it just doesn't happen again
let's put it in perspective anon, this bitch doesn't give a shit about you. Why do you care about a girl who would do this? not only that but you allowed yourself to fall into severe depression once again BECAUSE OF A DREAM. NOT "I HAVE A DREAM AND ONE DAY WE'LL LIVE ON ANOTHER PLANET" an actual I went to sleep my brain made up some shit to pass the time and then started crying over it.
Just chill out keep things in perspective, women aren't really that great and there's plenty of them out there. Work on yourself. I constantly trying to get better at math in my free time, there's so much stuff to do. if you want pussy that bad go out and get some.