Holy shit help.
I'm 21 and a virgin until recently. Got a girlfriend and we've been dating 8 months. I think she's really committed and she invests a lot in me and I like our relationship to a point. there are small things that I dislike about her but I wouldn't want anyone to change who they are.
rewind to two days ago where a really cute (and younger) chick starts hanging around where I work everyday and eventually asks for my number and we've been texting about ourselves.
I had second thoughts about my relationship and thought, "this is my first relationship. Do I really think she's the one, am I ready for that?"
I was thinking I could just tell my current gf that I'm not sure if a relationship is what I want/that I want to see other people and say that this is my first relationship and I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with seeing one girl and settling down.
the fuck should I do without being a total fuckboi and a douchbag? I don't want to hurt my gf but I realize that I've trapped myself by not realizing this sooner.
Is it wrong to think like that? Is wanting to experience other relationships and people wrong?
I feel like I'm cheating to a point where I'm starting to feel bad in the pit of my stomach.
>rewind to two days ago where a really cute (and younger) chick starts hanging around where I work everyday and eventually asks for my number and we've been texting about ourselves.
If this is all that it takes to get you to want to break up, there's no way you can do it without being 'a total fuckboi' or a 'douchbag'. You ARE both of those.
Have you talked about being exclusive with your current gf? If yes, then you're cheating. If not its kind of a grey area. On the one hand you haven't specifically comitted to not seeing anyone else, on the other 8 months is a pretty long time, it's kind of implied after 6 months.
>If not its kind of a grey area
I think 8 fucking months along it's pretty obvious that they're exclusive. Are you saying that 5 years into a relationship you could *technically* not cheat just because you never had the exclusivity talk? They're exclusive unless they've expressly said that they're not.
If you're feeling this way this early on, I sincerely doubt that you are in love or are at all right for one another... Especially given that she is already quite devoted and you're obviously not. Those doubts are likely to just get worse.
Do your girlfriend a favour.. Break up with her so she can have a chance to find someone who is going to commit to her the same way. She deserves that much.
holy shit I'm fucked.
This is probably the worst I've ever felt in my life.
It just went by so fast. a day turned into a week, and a week into a month.
How was I supposed to know about this? I've never been with someone else I didn't know there was an implication limit.
I don't know how long relationships take, I was just trying to be the best boyfriend I could be what am I doing with my life.
I guess thank you guys. I don't really know what to do... but I'll try my best
Understand that people do this all the time, searching for opportunities to upgrade, laying foundation with other people to have the chance of finishing development later. (establishing friendship then leading to more example). It's not necessarily cheating, but there is some sort of social-moral barrier that classifies some action as emotional cheating. What I will say is that who gives a shit what other people think?
You need to realize the outcomes of your options, do you stay with the one girl, wondering forever, feeling tied down, posting on 4 chan.
Or do you leave the relationship, for something that seems more prosperous, an enigma to you essentially, a risk, a gamble.
Don't let anyone tell you that either one of these options are better for you . As long as you are fully aware of both pros and cons of your actions to where you can make an unbiased judgement, and then decision, then they are both fine options. As long as you can accept the possible outcomes and consequences of either choice, then you'll know whats right for you. Nobody knows the girls better than you do, nobody knows you better than you, so how the fuck do you expect to make a decision for you. (just something to think about) Good luck
Wow there chief, triggered before you read the post, huh? I specifically said 6 months was about where you should assume exclusivity. 8 is pushing it. Where you got 5 years from is beyond me.