Do you trust your instincts? Your gut feel? How often are your instincts correct? For me it is almost always, I used to ignore them, think them false and deny them because I was a fedora tier atheist but long ago I changed my mind. Now because of that I am married, but 2 years after starting the relationship with my wife I'm resenting it.
Now my instincts are telling me to separate from my wife and go for a woman at my work who I feel attracted to. What do I do? Is marriage just a word? Now I think getting married was a dumb idea. I think had a bad feeling about it going into it and none of it feels right.
1. Don't shit where you eat, don't fuck where you work.
2. If you keep following your "instincts" as in "i want to put my dick in every qt i see" you'll eventually end up lonely because you get old and the qt's won't.
I don't mean like base instincts but like higher instincts I guess? It's hard to explain. I think more base instincts should be controlled but intuition should be encouraged. Why not fuck where you work? There are two married couples at my work. Granted I don't know if they met *at* work. I have heard of other people who met at work and gotten married and so on.
It's not like this girl is a qt as such, I mean she is not uggo but not conventionally beautiful either (although I find her beautful). I just have this inuition about her. I think maybe I am feeling this way because getting married has made me isolated, I basically don't see any other people except my wife so I have no chance to talk things out and move on. Is that a catch 22?
>Why not fuck where you work?
if it doesn't work out you have to face you ex every fucking day.
>getting married has made me isolated
That's sad. Just talk to your wife damnit. That is the first thing you should do when you feel like this or like something else.
Working shit out together is what marriage stands for.
My wife has long term psychosis so it's often hard to talk to her. I don't think we really work as a couple. It's also hard because I work, and she doesn't. She's entitled to disability payments because of her psychosis but refuses to get them because of paranoia or something.
Like I said above, I had a bad feeling about getting married to her but I sort of rushed into it thinking I would always be alone if I didn't just settle down with someone. Now it just feels awful. There is no romance in our relationship. Fucking is like a chore. She wants to have children and I think that is a super bad idea given her disability but she get's really really hurt whenever I say this.
Our wedding was completely forgettable and awkward. There was like 10 people there and no friends at my reception. It something I want to forget about and redo. It just seems like there should be more to getting married than what I got.
if it doesn't work out you have to face you ex every fucking day.
I understand that but I'm not worried about it for some reason? I dunno.
>talk to your wife
I know I should but it feels like such a lost cause to me. My wife has been really abusive to me in the past, like hitting me, kicking me outside for not wanting to have sex, threatening me with a knife because I bought home the wrong color of laundry hamper. I have cried in front of her because of it once. She has been pretty stable for a while now, but only because I said if she ever attacks or bes mean to me like that again I would walk out the door and not give a shit about any of my stuff.
Going on more about our wedding, my parents gave us like $200 as a wedding gift, my older brother's wife got us a something to cut the wedding cake with. It was intended to be sentimental and probably cost a ton (he is rich) but my wife threw it out like two weeks later. Her wedding ring cost like $80 and my ring is made out of stainless steel. I could go on and on...
I guess the main thing is not wanting to be with my wife. How to get away from my wife, how to tell her I want to move out. If I wasn't with my wife I would pursue this girl at my work, and if it worked and we ended up together great but if not I don't think I would be too worse off either, I am old enough and have been through enough now to know that there will be other people who make me feel the same way.
I don't have a problem with admitting I fucked up. I would feel bad about the stigma of being divorced, but I guess I wouldn't have to tell everyone my whole story either. I am most afraid of my wifes family being dissapointed in me. I really don't know how to handle what my mother in law would say to me. I have no father in law as my wife is from a broken home. So there's that.
My younger brother, my parents and my closest friend (who I never see anymore) all told me that getting married would be a bad idea. I know my younger brother resents me being married even now.
>I used to ignore them, think them false and deny them because I was a fedora tier atheist but long ago I changed my mind. Now because of that I am married,
You've got shit tier instincts then mate.
>but 2 years after starting the relationship with my wife I'm resenting it.
Holy shit kek, I'm right.
>Now my instincts are telling me to separate from my wife and go for a woman at my work who I feel attracted to.
Holy fuck you're instincts are basically telling you to give your soon to be ex more ammo to use against you.
The alimony and shit.
Holy fuck mate, you've been brainwashed or somethin'... don't trust your instincts.
In fact, do the opposite of whatever they tell you to do.
Holy fuck... I might be a fedora robot neckbear but my god, is this the life of a norrmal? Mistake after mistake because you want to believe that your instincts are good? Because you liked pussy? One impulse desicion after another?
If that how to be normal? Never learn from mistakes?
Holy shit... I've cracked the normie code.
>What do I do? Is marriage just a word?
Divorce first before hooking up with others. It's damage control. Marriage is just a word with many legal consequences.
>Now I think getting married was a dumb idea.
Ding ding ding.
> I think had a bad feeling about it going into it and none of it feels right.
Hindsight is 20/20, even your instincts hindsight.
Sometimes instincts are good. Mine tell my to never approach or try with women because I'm a creep. A record of 0 rejections in my entire adult life is pretty good result.
Your instincts butt-fucked you. Do not trust them, because like you, they like to stick their dick in things too. Mainly, your life.
too right mate.
I'm not worried about alimony though. I already read up on it, most I will have to pay is like $200 a month for 2 years. They can not make you pay alimony for more than 2 years here. It is nothing like in the US.
Holy fuck, where do you fucking live?
I'm not even in the US... I thought divorce courts were basically slave plantations everywhere...
What the hell... I need to know... just in case I "normiefy" and end up getting married.
Okay, if I ever get dumb, I'll go there to get married.
>Well if you do get up married you can rest easy that you will never be able to fuck it up as hard as I did.
If it can happen to you, it can happen to me. It's the people who aren't prepared for it that get hurt the worst.
> Balance your intuition and logic I guess?
Given how different the modern day is from our evolutionary origins, and how instincts only ever work on a very general basis anyway, I would say that analyzing your situation based on the facts and talking about it to people you trust is the best plan.
>your instincts, first impressions, etc are retarded
Does anyone have experience with getting divorced/separated. How do I do this. Do I just walk out? Apparently a lot of people end up just separating, waiting 2 years until they can freely get a divorce (You can not get a divorce in under 2 years in Australia without getting a certificate from a counsellor saying that reconcilliation is impossible).
I honestly don't care that much about the woman I am crushing on at work. It is just on my mind a lot. I mainly care about getting separated.
>I used to ignore them, think them false and deny them because I was a fedora tier atheist but long ago I changed my mind. Now because of that I am married
>My wife has been really abusive to me in the past
you trusted your instincts and you married a nutcase. Don't stick your dick in crazy Anon.
Get out asap.
I would not chase the office chick.
>long ago I changed my mind. Now because of that I am married
>"My wife has been really abusive to me in the past, like hitting me, kicking me outside for not wanting to have sex, threatening me with a knife because I bought home the wrong color of laundry hamper. I have cried in front of her because of it once. She has been pretty stable for a while now, but only because I said if she ever attacks or bes mean to me like that again I would walk out the door and not give a shit about any of my stuff."
>I used to be a fedora tier atheist
>tfw OP thinks now he's better then that for having a(n abusive wife)