I feel guilty, cause I don't wanna fuck my girlfriend. Main reasons include:
>about as exciting in bed as a bag of rocks - she only does whatever makes her feel good, and her head sucks... Absolutely zero effort put forth, regardless of the effort I put in
>day to day princess attitude, coupled with temper tantrums. Fully admitted to having princess syndrome and being spoiled. Doesn't want to change.
>Thinks she can get away with anything through her looks. Yet constantly picks at pimples, plays with her nails, picks at her teeth, smokes, and drinks alcohol like the world is drying up.
>Makes me pay for almost everything, and then gets mad when I don't feel I should share it all when I've paid for most of it. Doesn't want to actively look for a full time job (works part time at a bank right now) and lies in bed 4-5 days a week when she's not out practicing salsa.
>speaking of salsa, loves the attention she gets from other dudes. I ain't no cuck - I've reigned in her to some degree, but given the opportunity, she loves going out with a couple friends and dancing socially. I don't like the idea of other dudes dancing with my girl. Turns me off from her.
>poor hygiene - showers every 3 days at most. Yet, she'll spend an hour in front of a mirror getting ready to go out to somewhere as mundane as a grocery store. Couple that with the fact that she rarely cleans the house...
>makes some weird as baby whining voice sometimes when she wants shit that makes me shiver in disgust.
That's just skimming the surface. On the plus side, she cooks well, and is affectionate sometimes. I also think she loves me a lot. I wanna date a woman though... Not a child. Should I call it off? Is $6G in the bank enough to make a run?
So you can think of like 10 bad qualities, and only 3 good ones, 2 of which are fucking expected of a gf anyway. And you're asking us what you should do? I think you've made your mind up already.
I do not want to marry any woman. I've dated many beautiful women, and even some less than 9/10 ones. All of them have this primitive princess-like superiority complex going on. I think it's a generational thing. I'm starting to think that I might be inclined to take interest in older women.
Try a man for once, maybe you'll like the change. Especially considering men always want sex.
What your situation basically sums up to is this:
>she thinks she's better than you and makes you pay heavily for the pleasure of dating her
The best cure for princess syndrome is a really brutal dumping, tee bee eitch. The unexpected kind where the core of her worldview (i.e. that she can get whatever she wants through her looks) is shaken.
Be really nice to her for a week and then change the locks.
You're doing the rest of the world a favor, godspeed anon, women like this are scumbags.
Just be the sweetest guy ever for the next week and then change the locks. Tears will be shed OP.
Make sure she isn't on the lease if she's staying with you. If she is she can sue for not being given a thirty day notice.
your right about the first point but everything else can be dangerous
i was in the same position and did something similar and the bitch went absolutely apeshit. she tried to fuck with my guitar so i slapped her up a bit and spent the night a cell.
i don't condone violence against women but you don't fuck with a man's guitar
i had to wait until she got bored of me and fucked off on her own accord because i was too scared after that. she also raped me a couple of times
i'd just try being a really shit boyfriend on purpose instead, she'll eventually get the picture
Her and I share a place, and she's on the lease as the main leaser. That's why I'm fucked, and am asking if 6G is enough, cause if so, I can just call up a friend, give him $100, grab my TV, laptop, most of my shit and peace the fuck out at a moment's notice.
Plus she speaks Cantonese and so does the landlord, so I have no other option but to be the bigger man and get the fuck out on my own. Is $6G enough to start to rebuild my dignity with? I'd rather spend that on a motorcycle, but I gotta do what I gotta do, I guess.
No, you're not more mature than most- she's just a wretched human being, and will drop you for a richer man in a second. There's no loyalty with people like her. And the mere fact she likes to flit around for attention while still dating you... jesus. All this shit makes domestic violence well up inside of me and ooze out of my pores. I wish I could fast forward 20 years into the future when her looks are completely gone and she has no personality to back it up.
I honestly don't think people like her are even capable of "loving" someone else.
This bitch is toxic, and will ruin how you see all women if you stick around. I think... I think I like myself a lot better after reading this. I'm kind of... definitely not the worst.
6k should be enough, really. Just have a job and a simple place to stay. Stash your belongings somewhere till you found a more permanent place. This girl is just not for you m8. Just part ways. No shame in that. Good luck man
It's definitely enough. Make sure you break the lease through your landlord, because I'm sure she has no qualms about not paying the rent and getting evicted-therefore fucking your credit.
I literally have zero interest in fucking her but she practically begs me for it. I don't want to touch her that way though... I don't feel anymore sexual attraction to her at all, and I know I would were she to smarten the fuck up, cause she's pretty.
To be fair she's pretty loyal. She's never once made a pass at a guy that I know of, only merely been charming and cutesy whenever it suited the moment (such as getting drinks or attention).
I've been told that when I'm not around she has no problem being super charming however, to get a guys attention so that he supplies her with drinks all night or compliments.
And as for domestic violence... My mother was raped and I'm the result. I'm totally against it, 100%.
Let's just say that there have been times when she's had a temper tantrum (throwing things across the room or hitting my arms/chest over the most ridiculous shit, like me eating some chocolate that I paid for) that I've seriously questioned my loyalty to that philosophy.
Yeah I'm thinking of going back to white or Japanese, albeit white is hard to get, since I'm a ginger.
All the Japanese women I've been with have been considerate, calm, hard workers and respectful.
It's just disrespectful to you to be flirting with other guys. It's something I take seriously, but maybe that's just me.
Haha and as for the domestic violence. I mean, I'm not 100% serious, but anyone can be pushed too far. You seem like a decent dude anon. Whyyyyyy are you with her? It's like seeing a nice quiet girl with a Jersey Shore dude that pukes into her bookbag and talks about 'mushin sluts'.
You need to figure out a plan of action to remove her from your life. You'll be much happier, I promise. Dig up your lease if you can find it and see what the fee is.
So you´re sexually incompatible, she´s spoiled, she´s selfish and you stay with her because... she cooks well and is affectionate "sometimes"?
My ex was much the same. Speaking from experience: get out there - if you won´t, eventually she will.
And 6k should last you long enough to make a run for it IMO.
DESU I'm not sure of the stability of my job either. I think my boss would be a bit more forgiving and tolerant if I broke up with my girlfriend and moved out, since he knows her (and her BS) and I well, and has even experienced it for himself. I've worked for him for 8 months now.
It doesn't change the fact that I'd have to adapt to a whole new lifestyle without her. I've never had a live in relationship last so long (1 and a half years) so I'm worried that I could leave, become depressed, faulter at work, and then really screw everything up for myself.
I guess I lack the confidence to leave. I'm so worried that I'll be making a dumb mistake leaving the only person who actually knows who I am, inside and out.
It's hard, you know? Plus, where do you even start from after such a long term thing? The next longest relationship I've had after this was 8 months, and I got stung badly from that one too.
Drop her ass OP. Take it from someone that's been in a similar situation. There's plenty of other girls out there. And money shouldn't be a factor. Peace of mind and a bright outlook far outweighs that. Imagine waking up every day without her annoying ass around. Waking up everyday knowing you're free to do whatever it is you want without having to worry about her and her needs. She sounds like a drop kick anyway. And girls that need constant attention aren't keepers mate. Believe me. Eventually something in their head snaps one day and they will end up falling for some dickhead that pays them the slightest compliments because you've given up on them. Get out bro. It might hurt short term. But long term you'll be much better off. Trust me
all this bullshit for THAT? I thought you said she was hot. She's got a manface and a "wide" (not fat, but stockily built) body.
I mean she's not terrible, but Princess syndrome is a lot to put up with. I was expecting more.
My ex girlfriend was much more attractive and far less trouble, but still left me with a sour taste.
>Only wants sex for her own amusement.
Well what I can tell you is, you literally got yourself a Celestial Princess (That Is what I call them. Fuck your opinion on that matter)
Celestial princesses are only good for one thing, showing off.
She is literally substituting you for her father figure, and she is able to push you around because you are stuck with her.
She does genuinely love you, but with that comes a great burden to bear.
The only way for her to change is for you to put your foot down. Pull back the money. Pull back the sex. Pull back everything. Even the making of food. Just sit there. Look at her. When she asks you for stuff just tell her that she needs to work for it. You cant be arsed to support her lifestyle if she only sees you as a sugar-daddy.
She can start in bed (if that is where you want to start, its up to you really).
After that she will have to make chores at home and start to spend more time with you. Stop her whining and get a full-paid job.
You have the power to change her, because you control the flow of money.
If you really dont want to have anything to do with her just up and leave.
Place a letter on the nightstand before she wakes up. Tell her that you will be staying at a friends house for some time, and you need to be apart.
Tell her all the problems you have with her. Tell her that she never makes any effort in the relationship and you feel more like her father than anything.
In the end she will either have to accept it or break down. And you still have a chance to go back. But this time on your terms. Or just leave her like the cold hearted guy youll be (in her and all her friends eyes atleast)
Yeah man, but they're called 小公主 - literally 'little princess', They're the bane of my existence but usually I can spot them a mile away now.
OP if you break up with her, just be careful she doesn't get revenge in her own, immature way. I went through a crazy break up with one which all our mutual Chinese friends assured me was "normal" and a sign that she "really loved me". Godspeed.
Bro I moved to China with mine. She is Cantonese too. We lived together and even lived with parents for a bit. I went tough the whole rigmarole without even realising what the hell I was getting myself into. I was naive and in the dark about real Chinese culture.
When I did cotton on that we were heading to a very early marriage, I got out. Not just for that reason. We were not compatible and I didn't like some of her princess behaviour. I'll admit she wasn't as bad as yours. No where near. Yours sounds like a nightmare.
So I broke up with her. She moved out of the apartment we had (it was in my name). I stupidly thought we broke up on good terms but she came back to wreck serious havoc. As bad as it got was [empty] threats and almost getting me fired. After all the shit she made me go through for a few weeks she admitted she was still in love with me and asked if I wanted her back. I didn't.
Just cover all your bases. Change passwords. Make sure she doesnt have your bank or other personal info. Covertly delete your friends and family's numbers from her phone. Be polite and courtesy but ghost as much as you can. Don't be stupid like me and assume everything is fine and dandy. Breaking up out of the blue might come as a shock to her system. Good luck buddy.
Oh shit. Sorry to alarm you. Nothing bad like tricking you into having kids or anything like that.
I can't speak for your situation but for me I needed my ex-girlfriend to move on. Like I said, her post-breakup actions and craziness was because she still "loved" me. Similar to what >>16756418 said about your girl genuinely loving you.
But I didn't want that. I just wanted her to move on. But it's hard for a girl who loves you to move on if you're sleeping with her once in a while.
Just be careful she doesn't use sex to win you back.
Here is a "funny" story from foreign friend in China. He was casually seeing a girl and wanted to end things. After he told her he wanted to just be friends or whatever, she refused to leave his apartment UNLESS he fucked her again. She apparently took off all her clothes and demanded they sleep together. He did and he never heard from her again.