So /adv/, I recently got a boyfriend, but he hates being gay. Like when we snuggle with each other, he suddenly gets up, says he can't and starts to cry in another room or goes outside. I don't really know what to do anymore, I love him so much and I know that he loves me too, but his selfhatred always stops us. Also when we got drunk yesterday, he suddenly started talking about how he wishes to be normal and if there would be a way to be straight, he would choose it. But stuff like that only happens when he is really drunk
It sounds like he needs to go to a therapist to accept and love the way he is. No matter how much you love him, you are not equipped to handle his psychosis. If he does not get help, he may eventually blame you for being the object of his affection that makes him "abnormal" and take it out on you.
He needs professional help-
Be there to support him, but otherwise this is a journey that he needs to take with someone who had been trained
How was his upbringing? Was he taught that sexuality is something to be repressed? Did he grow up in a heavily traditional religious household that might condemn homosexuality?
He views being gay as a problem and doesn't understand how to accept it and in a way, that makes sense. It's easy to see your sexuality as shameful in a society which used to condemn such a lifestyle. I know that feeling, I'm a bi male so I can sympathize.
He needs to find out how to accept himself and who he is, the best course of action would be what the other anon already suggested, professional help. You could try doing it yourself but that's probably not a good idea given that leading down the wrong path can lead to resentment. Him going through therapy could really do a lot for him and your relationship.
He already goes to a therapist because of his manic depression, how exactly can I make him to talk about this with his therapist? Should I maybe go with him to a session?
We haven't had sex yet, we both wanted to take it slow because we are both virgins. The most sexual things we have done yet is he fingering me, sucking each other off and bathing together. He only stopped me one time while I sucked him and went outside and I heard him sobbing
His sexuality wasn't repressed at all I think, atleast his dad was really popular and always slept with girls, so he often asks him why he doesn't bring any girls home etc. His sister knows that he is gay, but I think nobody else in his family does.
Should I just go with him to his normal therapy sessions and try to talk about it with his therapist. I already try to do it by myself since he showed any signs of it, but if it actually won't work out, he probably needs help from another person too
I crossdress regurlarly, but he told me that I am much cuter normally without doing it, so I don't do it as often anymore. I still dress up 1-2 times a week and he doesn't seem to have a problem with it
Suggest that he does it, but don't force him to or out him to his therapist. You want him to do it on his own terms.
I recommend against going to a session with him unless requested, since therapy sessions are supposed to be private so the person feels comfortable talking. When you add other people to the picture, the patient often can't talk openly anymore. It defeats the purpose of going to therapy.
But yes, encourage him to talk about it to his therapist. His therapist, as their job, shouldn't judge, and if they do or your partner feels they will, you should look into finding a new one.
Agreed my nigga
My body is ready
Seconded. It's not good to be as crazy as I am, stop this when it's young.
I assume fags like animu girls because they're cute, same reason I could appreciate cute male animu. It's not all sexual.
Best of luck to you and him. Don't be afraid to cut stuff off if he gets too insane to handle, you need to make sure you're ok before you handle crazy.