I have two girls I want to go out with, but I want a long lasting relationship with a single one. How do you go about choosing?
I know one girl a lot more than the other, I am going to date the other to get to know her more but she texts me everyday and says goodnight while the other just falls asleep whenever. I don't know what to judge them on, they are both great.
How long have you known each one? The risk with the one you've known for a shorter period of time is that she's just in the initial phase of excitement. And once you date her for a little while she'll dump you because she'll feel bored
Are you sure of this? Have you slept around with 10-20 women and reached this conclusion? Or are you just, in this point of life, wanting to commit to one person for an indefinite amount of time?
Seems assholish but I have been thinking about it. Going to be tough because I can only meet them on weekends lol. Both have conflicting work schedules compared to me.
2 years for one and a month for the other.
The 2 years one we have been on and off again and found the other girl to make it finally off. New girl wasn't seemingly interested and 2 year girl really cleaned up her act to and said she wants a LTR but then new girl wants to date now too.
>I'm a grill
Of course you want one person. Most girls just want one person... The right person. Women are biologically designed to be selective of who they create offspring with, because the child will have a closer proximity to you and your emotional fulfillment.
It's an entirely different case with men
Well I don't think that's true in nowadays' society tbqh. Almost every girl my age (I'm 21 so it's not like I want to have kids yet) that I know of have been casually dating.
One month's nothing. You should probably wait and see if what you're looking for is a LTR.
Yeah I got it lol. It's just that you can't be sure that a girl you've known for a month actually wants the same thing, it might just be the initial excitement. Do you know a little of her past? Did she have a lot of BFs?
Girls don't casually date. They are auditioning men to see if they are that 'right person'. When a girl grows tired of a guy, she will leave to go audition another man.
Most guys date because they fear losing easy access to a vagina. Young guys that want a LTR are fearful of being assessed and rated by the female community, due to low self esteem.
Simple biology- women want the best sperm, men want a variety of frequent vagina.
She hasn't had a relationship. Her life, almost on the creepy level, has always been with her family. They buy three of everything apparently with her parents, she says she wants to get away from that finally.
Um it kinda sounds like she's using you to get away from it tbqh... I don't know her so I don't want to jump to conclusions but why hasn't she been able to get away on her own? Do you plan on living together or something ?
That is an interesting perspective that I didn't think about. She did say she wanted to be friends only but I told her that I'm seeking a relationship, no friends. She did have to think about it but she did say that she would be fine with that but of course we won't know until a few dates. She is looking to move out of her parents, I doubt we'd move in together anytime soon but I think she will be a lot more independent this year. 2 year girl is also moving out, she is on the fence about us living together despite knowing each other for so long.
Honestly I wouldn't seek a LTR with anyone who's not independant. I'd say wait at least until her plans to move out are concrete, but if she asks if she can move in with you then that's a big red flag imo.
What worries me is that she'll probably depend on you a lot since her family has always been taking care of her, and that might turn into a toxic relationship in the long run.
The girl you've known longer seems like a much more stable choice for a LTR. I can kind of understand why she doesn't want to live together yet though if it's her first time moving out. It's kind of enjoyable to feel like you're completely independant for the first time.
Ok, good man. I had to ask because so many guys rush into LTRs without having much women experience. Since you've fucked so many, these two must be decent catches. I say go with the one that is going to age well and be a decent mother. If that sounds like either one, then just flip a coin.
Or try and keep both?
I'm not OP, just a random man-whore, but yeah I agree. Lots of girls are damaged and I only seriously dated a few, still then they themselves were far to wrecked to even continue
They both aren't fully independent, that's pretty hard to do in this modern day and age. They both live with their parents but both are planning on moving out, both don't have moving in with me as their first go to. I think you are mixing up her involvement with family as a dependency financially, that isn't the case but it does seem like she's been isolated socially. 2 year girl makes a lot of sense in a lot of ways I agree. Maybe it's because new girl is immediately fixated on going out with me already vs. 2 year girl hasn't made any real commitment until now that makes me attracted to the new girl.
I have been with a lot. I'm very confident in bed, it's the process in getting them into bed I dread lol. Been with 2 year girl, new girl is a Virgin and haven't talked about any of that yet.
Thing is new girl might not know what she's getting into if it's her first relationship. I find it a little risky to plan a LTR with someone who's never been with anyone else. You've been with a lot of women so you know what it's like but chances are she'll be idealising your relationship and will backpedal when she'll realize it's not what she expected.
It might seem ideal, but the fact that she's a virgin doesn't mean anything. I have a friend whose GF was basically the same as new girl. As soon as she lost her virginity she gained a lot of confidence and ended up cheating on him and turned into a massive slut so yeah. That's your call but if you chose new girl, dating casually before getting committed might be a better idea.
Gather more information. When you can't gather any more and the choice still doesn't seem clear, flip a coin.