I found out a few days ago that my mom has breast cancer. I've tried calling her a couple times, but she hasn't picked up the phone. I sent her a text last night telling her I loved her and she replied back with the usual, "Thanks, I love you too." I don't know much about breast cancer because I've never really cared about it until now. I don't really know why I'm posting this, either. I just feel sad and scared for my mom and don't know what to do.
The woman just found out she probably has to lose her tits. I imagine that's scary. My grandmother went through the same thing.
My advice is to add a "I want to be here for you however I can mom. Whatever you need, I'm here."
Oh, piss off.
OP, breast cancer isn't an automatic death sentence. Cancer is still deadly, but ... it can be perfectly survivable. I don't know what stage her cancer is in. Try not to panic until you do. Keep trying to get in touch with her, multiple times a day. Text her asking her to please call you. Just be a good son. I won't tell you that it WILL be OK, to me those words are always hollow, but here's an absolute truth -- it could be OK. Good luck.
I just don't want her to feel like the only reason I'm calling her is because I'm obligated to. I'm legitimately scared that I could lose my mom because of this. She lives eight hours away from me (by car) so I can't just drop everything and go visit her right now. Like I said, I don't know much about breast cancer or even how severe her's is.
Depending of the type of breast cancer and the stage it could actually not be that bad. Breast cancer has a high mortality only because it has a high incidence, not because it's actually that deadly.
This might actually make you feel a bit better.
check the Survival statistics.
Just keep calling her man, she will only think you are doing it out of obligation if you stop doing it after only a few tries.
I just know breast cancer can be reoccurring. It frightens me that there's a possibility my mom doesn't have many years left. I'm only 22-- I want to get married, have kids, let her be a grandma. She's not supposed to die until I'm at least her age and can emotionally handle it.
one thing i want you to know is that it can be cured alternatively, though i can't say at what rate or with what more than a few specifics (and i don't know their contribution rate). what i'm getting at is, she wants to eat real food 100% of the time. the more raw, the better. and i've heard about cases where CBD oil has produced dramatic results, along with cases where just diet did too. but whatever she does in terms of chemo or no chemo and strictly alternative, make sure her diet is a+ material (so long as she's willing of course)
I've decided to schedule three days off next week so I can drive to visit her. This thread helped me realize what an ass I was being by not considering this sooner.
She makes a very good salary so I'm not worried about her not being able to afford organic foods. She's overweight, but I'll try to teach her about healthy eating/cooking when I go visit her next week. I'm sort of the family chef, so this can be another excuse for me to cook for her.
that's a much better scenario than i expected, i'm glad for you anon. exercise too is something i left out but that i'm sure is just as important as nutrition and maintenance to mental health
Steve Jobs on his death bed had one regret, and it was trusting alternative medicine and forgoing chemo and radiation treatments.
By all means eat healthy but listen to your fucking doctors and the chances are great that they are not going to fuck you over anymore than you already are.
i don't know enough to give definitive medical advice, which is part of what i tried to explain in my post. at the same time, i know doctors know more but they don't know everything. that's my personal approach to healthcare, and seeking out methods to heal oneself both through doctors and others isn't anything i see harm in. trusting some one-off person who cured themselves solely through X instead of a doctor isn't the way to go though, i agree.
No anon, dont push healthy eating and cooking on her when you visit next week. The last thing she needs right after a diagnosis is a diet to be put on her.
I would make a plan with her and her doctor, bring up your concern of her not eating healthy and being overweight and allow a group plan to be made. However don't incentivise unhealthy eating.
it's not a death sentance like it used to be
fifteen years ago my aunt had to get a breast removed because of a tumour, and she was fine afterwards.
my mother has breast cancer, but it's not likely to spread; and since the breast isn't a vital organ they just left it there
they say that given 500 years it'd kill her, but since people only live 100 she had little to worry about
a good friend of mine was like a chocolate chip cookie, with the chocolate being cancer
she had 8 removed surgically, then did chemo and she's fine now although she's still trying to gain weight
often there's a lot of uncertainty, remissions are fairly common, doctors can only be so sure
but at the end of the day it's not the worst kind of cancer to have by a long way, people usually get through and live normal lives