I don't think of my boyfriend when having sex and cumming.
He's my favorite person in the world, and I love him to death. But whenever I think of him during sex I get all mellow and I don't feel fully turned on.
I'm pretty into the idea of the dom-sub thing, but I know I wouldn't get turned on by it in real life. That's why I don't propose it to my boyfriend.
But that leaves me with the problem of cumming during sex. Whenever we have sex, I do get turned on a bit by the physical stuff, but I don't get mentally turned on. So I imagine hot guys abusing me. And my boyfriend is too sweet to imagine him doing that.
What can I do to get mentally turned on by my boyfriend, and to get aroused enough to cum? Right now it kinda feels like I'm cheating on him...
>What can I do to get mentally turned on by my boyfriend, and to get aroused enough to cum?
The problem isn't you, it's him, so you're approaching this wrong.
The problem here is you want a REAL man, but you have a boy, so of course he doesn't get you wet, he doesn't make you cum.
You want someone to choke you, bend your fingers back, slap you and call you a whore, someone to make you lick my cum off the floor because I didn't get it all on your face.
Your boyfriend is never going to do that, he doesn't have it in him.
You don't love him though. You like him- there's a big difference.
You like that he does all this sweet stuff for you, makes you feel special, you like all that.
You DONT love him, don't get it confused. What you love is me- what you're looking for is me.
You won't like me, but you'll love me.
You don't love him- move on, you shouldn't waste your life with someone that can't satisfy you.
Plus, it's a matter of time before you cheat on him, you see me in the grocery store, you think about me wrapping my hands around your little throat while I fuck you... one thing leads to another,
You know how it goes. Or maybe you don't- and that's a shame.
>my boyfriend is too sweet to imagine him doing that
Just try and get a little into dom-sub stuff. I felt the same way about my boyfriend, and I still think he's sweet and adorable. But when he gives me a certain look or says a certain thing, it just makes me want to roll over and obey.
Just because he's sweet doesn't mean he can't also be dominant as fuck when he wants to. There may be some stuff that will be your boundary, like I personally do not like the idea of actually being choked, slapped, or spit on. So just try and ease into it. Find out the differences between what's only hot as a fantasy and what's also hot IRL
Thanks for giving the first genuine (and helpful) advice.
How did you experience it at first having sex with your boyfriend? Personally I couldn't cum unless I was thinking of someone more kinky.
No, she's immature for needing a man who can put her in her place. She's a like a big angry baby that screams and yells until daddy says: ENOUGH! Guess she never had a father like that. It's never too late. If the animal inside won't kill the host that is.
Him and I went into a long discussion about both of our fetishes, so he knew all about what I liked well before we even started having sex. I don't remember exactly how it started, but it was little stuff. Biting my lip, keeping me against a wall while we made out. It took time for him to get bolder, and I made sure to give him lots of positive feedback afterwords. He got more confident, and now my sweet, kind, caring boyfriend has no problem getting rough and dominant, and I couldn't be happier
needs timestamp + asl
You're settling for second best, and you're happy because you haven't had the best.
If he needed to be pushed to know what to do, he will NEVER do it like someone that has it in their blood will.
You shouldn't be happy because you turned a piece of shit into a silver bar, you should be pissed you don't have a gold bar.
Someone pushing you against a wall and calling you a slut is not the best you can do
I see. We've had that talk about our fetishes too. It turned out he's pretty vanilla, but he's okay with broadening his horizons.
We've been having slightly rougher sex, but it never really feels like he's fully behind his actions, like he'd rather just cuddle me lovingly (which is, of course, great).
So a good idea would be to progressively get rougher? And to give him a lot of encouragement?
He might believe you're not ready/ not the type to like that/ not the type who deep down wants to be smacked around. Then again, he might just be wrong. Maybe sit him and down and tell how you really feel. Be clear. That should change his perspective hopefully.
Yeah, get rougher and let him know when he's doing something right (like making more noise or telling him afterwards). But I mean don't fake that stuff, only do that if it's actually seeming hot to you. And don't be afraid to say if you discovered something he did is better left as just a fantasy
Okay, I'll be honest with him about it.
Thanks for the actually good advice!
I'm in a relationship and me and my girlfriend are doing the whole dom-sub thing. The whole issue getting into that is, the guy might be into it, but doesn't want to seem rape-y. Talk to him about it, create fantasies together, then act on them, be patient and supportive even if he's not as dominant as you want yet. When you love someone, it can be hard to try to dominate them if you're not 100% sure they're into it.
Tl;dr: bring him into it slowly.
>something he did is better left as just a fantasy
That's my sign folks!