Does the fact that other people have sex but you can't make you feel jealous? Angry? Resentful?
I feel that way all the time. I'm disillusioned with the over-obsession with sex in our culture. It seems like people who are much uglier than I am can get laid at the drop of a hat, yet I can't even score a girlfriend. It makes me wish they would all die of some super-resistant strain of HIV, because none of them are able-bodied or able-minded enough to breed. It depresses me to the point where I feel like killing myself.
>I'm disillusioned with the over-obsession with sex in our culture
i suppose it reminds me of my own failures. but what other people do is their business. mostly it reminds me that i lack any sort of intimacy in my life, and i suppose that makes me slightly envious but not jealous
I'll just say that at the age of 29 I'm past the point of jealousy. It's not other people holding me back from living out my desires. I just haven't had the guts to make that full move yet. Maybe the act of being intimate is just easier for most people. For me it's difficult. All sorts of feelings come and go and will probably happen until I just finally decide to fuck someone that turns me on.
It sometimes bothers me, but not because I haven't done the act. I assume it'll happen when I find someone.
My worry is finding someone. But I'm working on it. I've got a few rejections now, and I just spent a very nice day with a woman who is at least somewhat into me.
Never give up.
I don't really give a fuck about it, sure it would be nice to get laid, but there are a lot of problems in our world right now; false rape accusations and the like that is literally causing a schism between men and women now.
>false rape accusations are a serious issue all of us need to address!
Quite serious actually.
It goes far deeper than you can imagine.
In 2008 alone, there were over 126,000 or so false accusations of rape against men in Spain alone out of 142,000 or so.
Resentful, angry, bitter, yup pretty much. Sometimes I think about sucker punching happy couples out on the street and then running away simply because they deserve it in my eyes. Especially when they're teenagers. But then I realise that I can't really run away and would just get beat up or land in prison. Shit sucks, happy people are disgusting.
I know, many don't really put it in their minds. However for those who are from Fragmented families (Divorced and raised by single mothers) it's kind of a big deal as they may repeat the same mistake or wind up worse than what their old man was going through if he was paying child support/alimony, etc.
its maddening but not out of jealousy or entitlement, just because I'm constantly horny as fuck and fapping is so goddam unsatisfying.
When times are dry like they are now, I try to remain grateful that I've at least accumulated some very hot sexcapades in my past with some very decent fluid druids. I've fucked girls in public, painted tits and faces with my seed, creampied a few pussies (and one ass), and even roleplayed an elaborate incest storyline.
I still lament that I've yet to fuck a girl with a perfect trifecta (gorgeous tits, face, and ass), and that I most likely will never claim a qt's virginity.
It's unbearable. I can hardly think about anything else. On one level it's just the privation of primal urges not being met, but compound that with the jealous feeling that this basic human need is something others seem to satisfy with relative ease, to the point that it's saturated the media and I can't even go to the gym without hearing music about smacking that ass, and I'm left feeling like I am truly not even part of the human race
I don't need a logical explanation for that, that conclusion is purely based on my feelings. Happy people piss me off, and deep inside of me I want them all to disappear, I want everyone to be as miserable as I am.
>I'd literally kill them all if I had the chance.
You'd kill all humans who ever had sex, or all humans who are currently in a relationship and not clinically depressed?
I wonder where I'd fall, I mean, I've had sex, I'm in love with my girlfriend and happy about that, but generally I'm at an extremely low point in my life, very miserable. Would you kill me/us?
>Tfw on the bus with my girlfriend
>we're sitting on the front seats
>She's all over me, head on my shoulder and caressing my pecs through my button up shirt
>off in the corner of my eye, I see some creep in a fedora give us the stink eye.
Nice power fantasy, you're retarded if you think everyone here carries a gun AND would be able to react quickly enough.
If you're not completely miserable all the time, especially in public, you'd be gone. Even if you suffer from depression, if you have someone to comfort you you're still dead in my eyes.
I just had my first date (ever) with a Japanese girl in Japan.
You know how I know I'm in there? Right as we left to get our separate trains, she reached out to brush my hand.
Literally like one of my Japanese animes.
That said, once a couple has committed to a relationship you absolutely see people holding hands and walking with an arm around a shoulder.
Of course, but it's not going to happen so I'd rather have everyone else be as miserable as I am right now. And yes, my defeatist attitude is the source of my problem, blablabla, I know that. That still doesn't change the situation though.
I never denied that, I just answered OPs question.
pretty sure you are the one with the power fantasy here mate.
let me ask you something why do you guys always want to kill random fuckers? i mean ok they may be happy but there not the reason your life sucks. i mean you guys could shoot politicians or the corporate elite or religious leaders or hell even the fuckers at the dmv but you guys want to kill people that are probably getting shit on as much as you?
I'm legitimately curious why people have so much misplaced rage against random people?
I never really gave a shit.
Then I met this girl that I completely fell in love with, despite knowing she was in a long term relationship and that it could never work out. Never told her how I felt. Knowing that she was getting fucked by her boyfriend who I viewed myself as better than by almost every metric pissed me off to no end. Honestly it still hurts to think about it.
Fuck you, go die in a fire.
Because that's not as satisfying. Happy people make you feel miserable all the time, just by looking at them. So making them and their loved ones miserable is satisfying. Of course it's a power fantasy, but it's a nice one.
It's not your attitude that causes a problem. You can have any attitude you want, the question is just what actions you take and how you behave. It's very difficult to overcome these kinds of blockades, but definitely not impossible. If you can muster the strength to do anything at all, you can always take a step in a direction you actually want to go in.
>you can always take a step in a direction you actually want to go in.
So, I should muster up the strength and shoot up a cafe or something? Or a bus full of teenagers? I mean, I can try. Hell, yes I'll try! I'm fired up, I'm pumped! I can do this!
ok but they aren't making you miserable, you are, i mean there are actually people out there that are making your life shit but you want to go after the ones who probably don't give a fuck about you either way. seems dumb.
I didn't mean to antagonize you, I'm just so fucking hype.
But my bigger point was that "PDA doesn't exist in Japan" is a myth. If couples holding hands triggers you, you aren't even safe in Akihabara. It rustled my jimmies at the time, too.
It's a very emotional response, big corporations and politicians don't have a face and don't perceivably impact you every single day, happy couples that make you feel miserable inside do.
I hope you liked my joke, please don't call the cops. As for actually improving myself, I need a better psychologist at this point.
Well, fuck. Anime has lied to me, again.
There are some real fucking shitty people in the world aren't there?
I'm 20 and it doesn't make me angry but I do feel regretful. I was diagnosed as a sperg at a fairly young age and as a result of complications having to do with that I was homeschooled from grades 10-12 and I missed out on middle school as well. Even when I was in public school I didn't make friends. I couldn't. I am currently attending the local community college andam in my 4th semester there. In that time I became friends with one girl, who moved away not very kind after. Other than that, there's one guy I was able to hang out with twice who now won't even acknowledge I exist. Another guy I was able to hang out with once also does the same. A third guy who I've been able to Cecile friends with is also a diagnosed sperg, but all he does is watch cartoons and play videogames. A fourth guy who I suppose you could call a friend will pretty much not interact with me outside of school but we'll have plenty of in depth and engaging conversations while on campus. There's lots of others I've tried becoming friends with but it never resolves into anything.
Actually became friends with, not Cecile. Didn't really proofread. I'm also in the south. Male. I like guns, politics, vidya, and anime and know enough to get into in depth conversations about all 4. I don't really know how to talk to people though.
Male member of a very happy couple here. Just wanted to point out to some of you "I wish I could gun you all down" folks e.g. >>16731859 >>16731783 that some of those people you hate have been through the exact same things as you. Before I met my girlfriend (and I was probably no younger then than some of you are now) I absolutely struggled with those feelings. Both the rushes of frustration & anger ("I see plenty of utter shitheads with girlfriends. What the fuck is so wrong with me?") and the bouts of self-loathing, which usually came when I was up late at night, when I actually did wonder whether there might be something seriously wrong with me.
I'm not going to patronize you by offering my advice when you haven't asked for it, but realize that most of the people you hate don't belong to some vague collective of privileged, happy people, they're just versions of you at different stages of their lives. Yeah, some of them reached those stages earlier than you did, and yes that's unfair, but eventually almost all of you are still going to find somebody (it doesn't matter that you don't believe me, it's still true) and when that day comes you're going to look back at all the hateful bile you spewed on this site, realize how many other people now feel that way about you, and be seriously unnerved.
I think everyone views and enjoys sex to varying degrees.
Take me for instance. I was in a 4 year relationship with a girl that gave me the sex life of my dreams and could have sex whenever I wanted. For a large portion of my relationship I had very little libido and thus no interest in sex despite my girlfriend throwing herself at me constantly. It wasn't until I got over my depression and came to understand how much I loved this girl that I really started enjoying sex.
Hence, I'm demisexual. I only really enjoy sex when it's with someone that I have an emotional connection to. I've fucked two women that I barely knew since breaking up with my ex and it was insanely boring and I would much rather have just sat down and jerked off to porn.
I used to be like you though, resentful, jealous, and felt left out. I'm no dating expert but generally I believe that sex happens BEFORE a relationship, so that could very well be your problem. You have to have a certain type of personality and practice certain skills with women to be able to take them home and get them in bed.
If I was still a virgin at my current age (21) I'd probably start considering paying for sex just to have the experience. I'm used to condomless sex with my ex though, so protected sex with someone I barely know just doesn't do it for me. Try it out though, you never know.
In the meantime don't stress out about it. Unless you've had sex countless times (which usually only happens if you're an experienced PUA or in a long term committed relationship) you'll be able to pleasure yourself far better than you would by having inexperienced sex.
I am a virgin waiting til sex before marriage. I'm already engaged and we are working on finding a home together and getting started on marriage prep at my church.
For me it feels very good. Sometimes its difficult but overall, I know that purity is a gift even though its not easy. I can go to church and to my bf with a clean and pure heart. He's the only man who has ever seen me naked, and he is the only man who will ever have sex with me.
It used to. I'm not a virgin, but haven't had sex in over 2 years so I might as well be.
Long story short, I got busy with a job and just stopped trying. I'm 24, I still have plenty of time and would rather focus on my career than immature girls
Take the same mentality and you'll cope just fine
This thread is pathetic. If you resent others for something they have like this that you don't to the point of a violent power fantasy, you need some fucking help.
That said, while I don't feel jealous like that, I guess I am a little envious. I've had a lot of self confidence and self image issues throughout high school, and now at 24, I'm still alone, though I've gotten good at faking confidence.
A relationship at least would be nice, but I haven't even had any lasting friendships since high school. The loneliness is stifling.
23, haven't had sex in five years or so. I don't really think you're missing much in regards to having sex. I really just miss the romance that goes with it.
I really just miss having someone to lay with and tell secrets to and act autistic and retarded with but it's normal because you have that person who's the same.
I've said it already, I know that it's stupid and not logical, but it's an emotional reaction, it doesn't really give a fuck if it doesn't make sense.
That said, I don't actually plan on gunning you down, I just hope you die of a horrible disease or that your girlfriend dies in a traffic accident. I would suckerpunch you two on the street if I could get away with it though.
OP again. Just wanted to point out that I am in no way advocating violence against anybody. I'd like to think that they are hurting themselves somehow by being so careless with their sex lives.
I've only done this to myself. Maybe I'm just projecting, but it might be the same for you. I wish I could go back 11 years with the pseudo-confidence that I have now. I would be so much happier with just a few changes, it's almost even more depressing.
I don't have the best social skills, but I always find myself too busy with other shit to try to work on them.
I guess I'm gonna have to work on that on my own. I just wanted to get feedback and encouragement from others who are in the same predicament as I am.
If it helps, I'm 30 years old. I'm a kissless handholdless virgin.
I'm also >>16731858
I'm also this guy in the pic. I really worried I'd never meet anyone. I put myself out there and got rekt. But so far, with this girl, it's a pretty nice first try.
If you want to go for it, your own action is required. Failure hurts but it pushes you forward.
I've intentionally avoided sex all my life because I'm a fatherless bastard in the most literal sense. I don't want to have a kid by accident and have them go through that shit. Marriage or bust.
Not sure if if this is relevant anymore, but I was a kissless virgin 'til I was 24. Didn't make me feel resentful, angry, or jealous, just sometimes made me feel a little lonely I couldn't find anyone to be with. At the time, I didn't think I really deserved anyone to be fair, and so I self-sabotaged and just never took any risks.
One day I met someone who I did want to take a risk with, that made me see the world in a light i'd never before, legit fell head over heels for her, and failed spectacularly. But after that I just said fuck it and had absolutely none of the fear, anxiety, or shame that plagued me before. Afer that I decided to date for the first time in my life, decided fuck it, and threw my virginity away on literally the first girl I met...
Absolutely nothing changed and it actually felt empty as fuck.
Even so, I kept dating, and eventually I met a partner or two where things actually felt amazing and like I was sharing a special connection. It would take me about two years of continuous dating to meet my girlfriend, and during that time, I felt like I was a little cursed (a legit crazy chain of bad luck hit me...like... no exaggeration... people would literally die...), but it all worked out in the end, and the loneliness dulled even as I dated and realized that everyone in the dating scene was pretty much going through the same thing.
>TL;DR: Sex is overrated. It can be amazing at times, but it can also be insanely shitty and definitely isn't something worth being miserable about.
>Does the fact that other people have sex but you can't make you feel jealous?
Not really, I mean if I really wanted to have sex i could just pay for it. It probably wouldn't fix anything though since being a virgin isn't the problem but a consequence.
The man was unstable and if it wasn't sex, there is no doubt he'd have gone mental over some other glorified thing in our society. Does that mean he would have definitely shot up a school no matter what? We can never know for sure, but we know he'd always be a risk in our society no matter what he did.
As someone who was supposed to be there that weekend, that has friends who lived less 50 ft away from where he did that, when he did that, and that knows someone who he shot (he lived)... Yes. Yes I can definitely blame him.
Have you read even bits of his "manifesto"? Dude was an entitled, whiny as fuck prick who threw a tantrum and attacked completely random people when he realized he couldn't get "the people who wronged him".
Oh how I'm laughing
All these male virgins... It's natural selection, simple as that. Like some anon mentioned, even shitty, stupid people can get into a relationship and procreate. If you can't, well, there must be something truly wrong with you. And OP is the prime example of that, getting bitter and salty because his own nature prevents him from finding a gf, instead of simply accepting the fate. There is, always has been, and always will be a procentage of people who won't find a mate. It ain't fair, but that's how the world works, so instead of wallowing in self pity and crying 'ah, what a poor me, I always wanted to be in a relationship!!! I feel like big bad world cheated me!!!', grow up and move the fuck on. Hire a hooker or kill yourself, if you can't deal with being unwanted by the society.
hey, you sound like me. My life has been shit for a while now but ever since mom died it got like 100 times worse. I feel lonely but I'm afraid of getting attached to people because they mind end up leaving me again. Almost had sex but then stopped because I was afraid of being so intimate with someone. And going to a therapist used to help me a bit but it doesn't anymore.
I want people near me but also not really, I hate this situation so much.
Dude, you're living a self-fulfilling prophecy. You agonise over your virgin status, but adopt the most defeatist attitude about it.
I've got some questions for you:
>a) Why do you care about being a virgin?
>b) Why do you care about the fact that other people have sex?
>c) Are you going to do something about your obsession with sexuality?
I'm not saying hire a hooker or have a one night stand, but find a way to get over it. That could be figuring out how warped your logic is and finding a way to actually be comfortable enough with yourself that you become a more pleasant person to be associated with.
The idea of being a virgin would bother me more if I didn't know that it was going to end soon. My girlfriend and I have seriously discussed sex and it's practically all about being patient and playing the waiting game at the moment. Good things come in good time.
Being a virgin doesn't bother me. It's just who I am.
The only time I get pissed off about it is when I'm having an argument with someone and then they can't think of anything to say so they just go "Whatever virgin LOL".
At which point, if they're black, I go "whatever NIGGER lol", women "Whatever kitchen-bitchin LOL".
Because writing me off because of who I am pisses me off. And I'll do the same to them in a moment if they try it.
You are idiots and I mean people who think being virgin or never having sex sucks. You don't even realize what free time and energy you have in your hands.
Sex is energy of life, think about it you create life with your penis, USE that energy to fill your passions, or use that energy and dominate in your field of work.
I realized it when I was 19 and I am 27 now I am virgin and I don't regret it. I even turned down sex, just to keep that vitality in my life.
Oh and don't jerk-off to porn or even your own thoughts, you'll once again spend that energy away, if you have blue-balls then perhaps yeah, but again you'll get blue-balls cause you are watching at porn (I know cause I did the same in early stages) but now even if I do get them which is fucking rare I just endure the pain
Turn your weakness into strength
>envious of sex-havers
Not exactly, it's just the icing on the misery cake.
I have no idea how to maintain or make social connections with dudes let alone women. I'm more jealous of socially adept people who are able to make conversations about almost anything. Being a virgin is just a symptom of other issues.
At this point I just assume sex is one bug practical joke that other talk about and doesn't actually exist. Babies are probably made in tubes or something. People talk about sex, but I've never been close enough to one of these sexual situations that are supposed to "come completely naturally" that I'm pretty sure it's not a real thing.
>my mom won't let me have sex with her
I'm not a virgin, but I haven't had sex in nearly 5 years. I'm 22 now. The times I had sex were pretty bad; persistent problems with e.d. being a key factor.
It makes me feel like I'm missing out on so much. Missing out on intimacy, missing out on happiness, missing out on being included.
No, I don't feel bitter about others. When people I like do well romantically I feel good for them. It's not even the sex I'm that fussed about. What bothers me is feeling like a failure. I'm good in a lot of areas but sexual confidence/women/romance is not one of them. I have the mindset that I can achieve anything I want to, but that I'm not attractive compared to others. I struggle to see why any girl would want me. I could go on all day about my issues related to this. In short, I feel like a loser.
If anyone has advice on mindset or anything relative then please chime in. You'd be making a genuine difference, because I don't want to wallow in pity, I want to change my situation.
Well I'm not a virgin but I haven't had sex since high school, and I'm not bothered. But that's probably because I've already done it so I don't have a bad title over my head and I'm also disgusted in hook up culture.