My girlfriend hugs and sleeps (not meaning sex) in the arms of her best-friend. Who is a boy.
I said to her that she has to stop it but am I to jealous or to possessive ? I don't want to share her.
She knows the guy since childhood and she says that she only does it since their other best friend commited suicide.
If she does this often and she has shown you that her relationship with that other boy is strictly platonic, then let it continue. You have nothing to worry about. If she starts getting even closer to him than she already is, then you should have another talk with her.
It's suffering for me but I know that the right thing would be to let her free of doing those things. It's complicated because I am myself mentally unstable and thought that our relation would be a relief stress-wise. It's the contrary.
I personally think this is a little naive. If you are ok with it,there's always that chance of a reversal, always the chance that they have an easy rapport to cheat. Understand that men conduct warfare in subtle ways; they set up a 'trap' or 'foundation' before hand. The second you 2 fallout, disagree, argue etc, guess where she goes? right.
What you need to do is, tell her how you really feel, that you would prefer it if she didn't sleep with this guy. Do not tell her that she can't see this person, but try to offer your services to her, that if she is having those feelings about her friend that she sleep with you instead. gl
Yeah that's what I told her. That she has me for that. And told her that the guy should get a girlfriend.
But I don't know, I can't say if I'm right with this.
Thanks, what you're saying is rassuring. She didn't understand when I compared it with cheating. It made me ask myself about being too paranoid. But like you're saying it's seem to easy for them to make it to the next step.
I bet the guy is deep in the friendzone.
So no way she will have sex with him.
Its ok for your girlfriend to hug her friends, even her male friends.
But sleeping in the same bed with some other dude while she is in a relationship is far form ok. Even though he is her "bestest friend in the whole wide world"
Find a female friend you have no sexual feelings for, and ask your girlfirend if its ok if she sleeps with you in your bed.
I told her that if she sleeps with the guy I'll send him to an hospital. And she totally freaked out. But that's because I'm impulsive as fuck.
I don't want it to be frustrating for her but as you say I don't want to be a cuck.
She freaked out because she's worried you'll find out, kill him, she loves her lover, and she loses her boyfriend (you go to jail)
Just cut things off man.
No woman is worth getting arrested for, so just avoid the ones that will end up landing you in prison, yeah?
Sleeping with him is totally not-OK but the hugging part bothers me too. Is it overreacting ?
I "hug" friends sometimes but it's like a 5 seconds hug when you meet, what she does seems closer to cuddling.
This shit is a dilmena.
And what bothered me the most is that she said to me that she didn't told me about it because she didn't even think about the fact that it could be weird from my point of view. Is she lying or juste being naive ?
Yeah, I had a great relationship with my ex wife until I found out she was a whore
When liars get trapped in a lie, they make new lies to explain away the new suspicion
It was at the point where I caught my ex wife red handed and she STILL didn't stop lying
I can't imagine cuddling with someone I wasn't romantically interested in..idk man, that's weird. I'd feel uncomfortable if my bf did that with some girl, sorry no, more like really pissed about it.
Yeah I'm really pissed off. The fact that she tried to play with emotions with the "we're doing it only since our friend died"-part made me angry as fuck. I didn't think she could be so manipulative.
Maybe I'll do it. Could seem paranoid but it's a fine way to reassure myself if nothing is going on.
That's bullshit from her OP. Call her out. Even I'm not that fucking close with my own twin sister, and I love the shit out of her. She obviously has something going on with him. Break up.
I will never understand why faggots like you put up with this sort of bullshit and need someone else's advice on whether or not you are justified to feel this way. Break up with her. This isn't acceptable in the slightest, get out while you still can.
I shout out at her and she said that she understands that what she was doing was wrong. And said to her that I will break up the next time I hear about something similar.
And for that anon wondering why I ask advice, it's because she played that "I didn't know you would care"-role. It was confusing at fuck and I started asking my self if I wasn't too protective. That's it.
Hugging is one thing, but you're well within your rights to demand she not sleep (figuratively or literally) with other guys, especially ones she's close with.
Seriously, that is a huge red flag. Lying in bed and spooning, bonding over loss... next thing they're lightly fondling, then making out, then straight up fucking.
I couldn't trust that shit and neither should you. And her justification is utter nonsense. Tell her she has to knock that shit off or it is unequivocally over.
OP you shouldn't have to tell a gf that this is wrong they should know and not even go there. The fact she did shows no respect for you or your relationship. She has shown you her priority. Trying to hold on to a girl like this is a waste of your time.
If this dude is not obviously fucking ugly, then you'd bee a fool to think there's not some kind of attraction between them. There's nothing wrong with that, of course, as long as she's loyal to you. I bet you find other chics hot all the time, for example, even though you don't act on it.
Hugs are harmless, however sleeping next to this guy is making it reaaally fucking easy to cross the line of being loyal and enter the realm of cheating, all it takes is a split second of weakness. Exposing both you and her to that risk is, to me, a really stupid and unnecessary move that could easily be avoided.
I'm in the belief that people are innocent and mean what they say.
She does this to one guy. How about you ask him yourself if she's ever slept with him while you two were dating. We don't know the situation or what she's doing.
I'm a grill OP and it sounds fishy, even to me. Anyone past puberty would know better than that. You have to live in another world to genuinely think it wouldn't bother your bf to sleep in another guy's arms.
Not 1 other person has mentioned the small fact that their other best friend committed suicide?!
If they were a group of 3 best friends and one of them commits suicide, then those 2 other people are usually going to become closer friends.
I would still be cautious of it after I told her exactly how I felt about it.
Don't check her phone and shit. That is fucked. Either break up with her meow, or deal with it and if she fucks the other guy, break up with her.
Checking other people's phones and shit is childish creepy and impulsive. If you don't trust them that much, break up with them.
God OP, you've gotta be joking right?
Do you think that it's acceptable at all to be in a relationship with a women who does that? Best friends or not, like they say, straight single women and straight single men can't just be ''friends''.
Have fun being cheated on if you don't confront her one way or another