Guys don't like clingy girls, do they? (not asking virgin guys)
I worry guys only want to cuddle and be clingy if sex is going to happen. Not just for it on its own, and not in a "daylight" kinda way.
Is that true, in your experience?
I'm happy to clingy and cuddle with my gf and sex doesn't have to happen.
But with a girl I'm not in a relationship with and she has no intention of being in relationship with me then it is a waste of my time.
Being an affectionate girl friend isn't the same as being clingy.
Most people like to hug and cuddle every now and then but it can't be excessive. Especially if you have things you need to do.
Because she my partner, I want to do things to make her happy, if spending a few moments of my time comforting her is what it takes I'll gladly offer them with no expectations in return.
Why would I waste my time doing anything for a girl that doesn't want to be in relationship with me? I fail to see what I get in return.
The fundamental idea is that you should enjoy the intimacy as much as her. The reward is in the act itself.
I truly hope not all men feel like you, then I'll just have to go dyke as >>16724024 suggested.
Why would I enjoy the intimacy with a girl who isn't my girlfriend?
Do you want me to be clingy and cuddle with every girl who wants it?
What about my gf, don't you find that action a bit dishonest?
You need to stop trying to feed on other peoples emotions like some kind of a vampire bat.
The male equivalent of this would be to invite you to a date or what ever and then expect the woman to pay.
I said pay, not split.
And it's not sex that is payment, it's relationship and intimacy, typically relationship just includes sex.
Why would you cuddle with someone you aren't in relationship with? That's just dishonest and leading the person on.
You're misunderstanding this entire thread.
I'm not asking about a situation with only cuddles and no sex. I'm asking about cuddling in the moments of each day where there isn't sex. You can't practically fuck all day long.
For example: cuddling after sex. Cuddling while trying to get to sleep. Cuddling when waking up in the morning (and perhaps there isn't time for sex). Etc etc
The cuddling BETWEEN the moments of sex.
Ye people have different preferences and yet they still like to do things for their partners.
I'm betting you don't want to watch football or what it is he likes to do with him all the fucking time either
So I'll repeat myself;
Why would I waste my time doing anything for a girl that doesn't want to be in relationship with me?
I have nothing to gain from a clingy girl, the intimacy gained from a clingy person is poor and one sided. Why be comfort to her if all she is going to do is take from me?
As a guy who had to deal with 3 clingy gfs I must say being clingy is one of the worst things a girl can be next to being a slut or a liar
From my experience these girls have really low self esteem and usually very small social circle and they can't take care of themselves and need constant attention. I don't mind cuddling from time to time or holding hands but fuck doing that all the time
The worst thing about clingy girls is that they get incredibly jealous all the time often for no reason so they try to be close to their bf all the time to prove that the bf belongs to them and they don't get that this excessive cuddling and public affection displays and all lovely dovey shit is suoffacating in the longer run
Fuck that, I used to think clingy girls are cute but the amount of pain in the ass they tend to generate is just not worth it.
Man reading that anon answering to you is painful.
I've been wondering this too. My ex got mad at me because he said I was leading him on when we were cuddling and watching TV and didn't have sex afterwards. It really surprised me, I mean it's just nice to watch TV with someone in your arms. Good thing we're not together anymore
being clingy with girls or girls being clingy with you that you don't want to have sex with isn't a bad thing in any way.
not all girls 'want' something from you, except that they maybe just want to feel accepted by guys (you) to build their confidence.
>nothing to gain
other girls that you like will like you more because of jelousy etc. right?
But I think OP doesn't mean clingy in that way? I just find it weird that when you hug a guy he always expects it's for sex. I just enjoy touching and being in close proximity with the people I like, idk I find it really comfortable to have a nap or things like that.
Thinking back my ex was a real pain in the ass, when I didn't cuddle with him he'd say I was being distant and shit then when I did he'd say I lead him on. Fuck that, I'll never cuddle my future BFs from now on
I'm a girl and I fucking hate clingy girls. I don't know if they feel the constant need to hug and cuddle and touch people because their parents abandoned them emotionally or what's the deal, but I have to shake off bitches like that constantly. Not even good friends, just some classmates who assume it's okay to lean on me and play with my hair or hug me from behind, and they never acknowledge it might be uncomfortable to me. This shit is for your SO, not random people or mates.
I wouldn't have had to repeat myself unless someone didn't get my original point now would I.
Thank you again for the permission to be quite, shame you're so poor at leading by example.
Well yeah I'm a girl and I don't like it either when it's acquaintances but we're talking about the case where you're in a relationship. These kind of people are what you'd call touchy, not clingy.
Why would someone try and lead by example when they're telling a person to shut up? That doesn't even make sense.
My god you're the most irritating person I've encountered this year.
Aside from the minority who have some kind of fetish for super clingy girls, most people find it annoying after a while.
From my experience, guys tend to be clingy just as much. I've encountered ex boyfriends with the constant need to stop in the middle of the street and attempt to make out with me, which was annoying as fuck.
No you didn't, the fact you made this thread implies you didn't.
I don't see how you can't accept or understand why most men won't put up with "clingy" behavior from a girl they can't be with. Same way if you swap the genders, women don't want clingy men either. Everyone needs some degree of space and self-responsibility from their "friends", "fuck buddy", "spouse" or whatever you want to call it.
Even with sex clingy behavior is generally an intolerable burden. Your worries is basically your common sense kicking in. In general, clinging and cuddling is something most people do before during and after sex. If there's no sex there might not be a point for some(most) men.
Not really just means we're not right for each other.
Or we're not communicating our needs enough and compromising like a couple is supposed to.
I would say it's the case for most people, don't cling or rely on someone you have no intention of returning the favor to. I'm not saying have sex when you don't want to either, I'm saying don't be a parasite. Don't be the girl who only calls when she needs a favor, or clings to other dudes and shit while in a relationship.
I like clingy, its so easy to convince a girl to do something in bed if they're clingy. I like it the most when i feel down and angry but she keeps trying to get close to me. What i really hate is that clingy girls can get really fucking annoying, and they're easily controlled. I let my girlfriend have some freedom instead of having to be all over me. I just hope it doesnt fade away.
I was just responding to your rant of hopelessness. You sound like the equivalent of a guy who's only interested in sex in my opinion. No one is worth dating unless you get exactly what you want.
Anyway to answer you question, I do not like cuddling or clinginess, I like my space.
If I had a gf who did however, as I said in my last post we would need to reach an understanding and compromise so our needs are met from one another.
Some random girl or friend who is female and I'm not having sex with can fuck off.
But no one said we only wanted to cuddle??? It's like I'm asking you if you like eating strawberries, can't you simply answer yes or no without any other factors involved?
Seriously you worry me. I explicitely told you I didn't care if your GF liked it or not, but you still found it necessary to repeat yourself, you're the one with poor reading comprehension here. And I didn't even talk about acquaintances acting clingy either, only your SO.
We want to know for pure reference. If most guys dislike it then I won't ask for cuddles, that's all. I don't see why you go on about how a relationship should be, no one asked about that.
Nobody, worth dating, likes clingy people. Clinginess comes from insecurities, and regardless of any other factors, being insecure is an issue that will continue to be a problem in any relationship.
So ... do men like clingy girls? No, unless they're weak men.
>But no one said we only wanted to cuddle??
I didn't say that either, I said you in particular sound very narrow minded.
>It's like I'm asking you if you like eating strawberries, can't you simply answer yes or no without any other factors involved?
Put that in the fucking OP then you dumb bitch, or did you forget the part you asked us to describe our experiences?
>Seriously you worry me. I explicitely told you I didn't care if your GF liked it or not, but you still found it necessary to repeat yourself, you're the one with poor reading comprehension here.
Again, you need to slow down and really read what I'm writing here. You still got an answer to your question and have nothing to really bitch about.
> And I didn't even talk about acquaintances acting clingy either, only your SO. I don't see why you go on about how a relationship should be, no one asked about that.
Again address that in your OP because you asked there. Even if you only cared about what you asked in >>16724330 (which is full of shit thanks again to your poor reading comprehension) you still got the answer.
It's like talking to a child. A clingy child.
With poor reading comprehension.
>be nice to clingy girl because I feel bad for her, but make it very clear that I'm not interested in her
>get sexually assaulted
Admittedly, I'm a virgin but I'm surprised at how many say they don't like clingy. I would love a pretty girl who wants to cuddle with me all the time.
What's the point of a relationship if you only touch each other when you need to release your sexual impulses?
I'm assuming by "clingy" you mean in a physical sense.
All guys have different levels of tolerance. Like my girlfriend and I are huge movie goers so I don't mind if all she wants to do for a night is cuddle and watch movies by ourselves, no sex involved. This due to the facts that we have a good sex life and I just genuinely enjoy it. It's a stress reliever and we have fun.
As always it depends on the guy. My husband is very into physical contact and loves kissing, cuddling, etc. even when there's no imminent sex.
People are people, and tastes differ. There's always going to be someone who likes it and someone who doesn't.
Honestly, for me, if a girl I'm in a relationship with is all cuddly, that's fucking great. It's bonding, and I fucking love being all snuggled up watching movies and shit. It's a physical form of affection that doesn't usually lead to sex (unlike kissing etc), which I really appreciate.
If a female friend who I'm NOT in a relationship with cuddles up to me, I'm going to be freaking the fuck out trying to not seem awkward, and hiding my diamond-hard erection. It is just not normal for me to engage in that kind of contact with someone I'm not in a committed thing with.
All I ever wanted was to cuddle and hug. The only problem is that if I don't want to fuck them, I'm suddenly bad and I'm using them. Seriously? I just want a woman to hold it doesn't matter who it is or if it's a 500 pound whale I just want someone to cuddle me back.
You need to ask yourself if you want to hug and cuddle because you want to provide comfort or because you you want to receive comfort. Those are two different things. The action itself is neutral, it's the intention that count. If you constantly need attention and comfort and validation out of loneliness and insecurity then yes, you will hurt your relationships. Not because you're clingy but because you're self-centered.
>The only problem is that if I don't want to fuck them, I'm suddenly bad and I'm using them
Isn't that a communication problem? Some actions are typically seen as an escalation toward sex and there is nothing wrong with that. All human interactions consist of things that typically lead to another. If you engage in an action that typically lead to another action but which you do not want to follow then you should talk about it in advance. It shows that you don't want to hurt or mislead anyone by mistake. It is a very simple measure to communicate that you know X is associated with Y and that you are interested in X but not Y.
My boyfriend and I hold hands everywhere (except for when it's crowded and people need to get past us) and cuddle wherever we sit and give each other lots of little kisses.
That's just how we roll; we like doing this shit because it feels nice and we both like feeling loved. We thought it was just a honeymoon phase, but it's been two years and we still do this. And even if we did stop doing this one day, I feel like it'd be a mutual thing with no hard feelings.
Bottom line is that it depends on who you're with, OP. We can argue all day about what guys want "in general," but it's honestly not gonna matter if the guy you end up with happens to be different. There's no formula for a good relationship; you need to fumble through like the rest of us and figure out a person's likes and dislikes along the way. If your guy doesn't like it, well, then that's just how it goes.