there are two guys in my medical terminology class and six thousand pretty girls with the hair and makeup and water bottles going on about lifting and stuff. like the one water bottle says "LIFT CRAZY OR STAY THE SAME" or something.
anyway it's a long class like 4 hours and sometimes i have to pee. because oh shit the spiro is incidentally a diuretic. incidentally in my case. sometimes it's prescribed as a diuretic, like if you have heart problems. i don't have heart problems i just hate my penis. so one girl is really loud and answers all the professor's hypothetical questions loudly and obnoxiously. she responds more than the rest of the class combined, probably because it's implied that we're not supposed to respond. and i have to pee and other girls do too. she's always one. she like camps out at the bathroom door and stares at me and i feel weird and walk past the bathroom. there are a lot of weird bathroom stories i have. like once i walked into the men's room and some girl said to her friend, "omg she just walked into the men's room."
and another time i walked into the men's room and some crazy guy was like, "hey, this is the men's room." and i'm like okay and i peed at a urinal and he was like oh you look like a girl and i'm like hey thanks this is awkward and i hate myself.
so when i go in there this last time she says, "you shouldn't be in here." i said hey don't worry i'm not here for you. and it was very awkward and i had around her to get to a stall and i was the last person back in class. the professor was obviously waiting for me specifically to get back because once i sat down she started up again. i hate girls.
sometimes i want to die. this is why i drink.
thankfully school offers free counseling. my anatomy professor tells me this is the only time in my life counseling will be free and i should take them up on the offer.
i intend to, but that's kinda besides the point of the thread.
im really trying to empathize with your problems, but you literally created these problems for yourself
>im gonna go trans and nobody's gonna be weird about it, even though it's the most unnatural thing on the planet and scares the shit out of people
have you ever seen a youtube video of a person that is physically fucked up and made you go "ew"? that's literally what everyone's thinking when they see a trans
>sometimes it's prescribed as a diuretic, like if you have heart problems. i don't have heart problems i just hate my penis.
looks like you have more problems than just going to the bathroom
i dont know, a person walking with 4 legs, or a guy whose head is falling on his back, or that two-headed trick
freaks, trans people are pretty much in the same category, but those people have the benefit of being born with it, at least they didnt cause it to themselves
oh neat. i didn't realize so many trans people were physically handicapped.
yeah sometimes i have problems even when i don't have to pee. it's a hard life but you find ways to cope.
>oh neat. i didn't realize so many trans people were physically handicapped.
Trans people are literally handicapped by definition.
>a congenital physical or mental impairment
Fuck, trying to change your physiology into something that's neither man nor woman, what the fucking fuck.
transphobia is so novel and fun to read. thank you so hard for posting your relevant and helpful opinions.
we're all better people for having read them.
Hey, I'm sorry, I really don't want to be a transphobe, but I just don't get it at all.
The only trans person I can respect are hermaphrodites, who were born with both and the doctor couldn't decide what the right gender for the person was. He could have picked wrong but you physically grew up as the other, then adjust accordingly to your physicality.
But those are like...5% of trans people. The rest of fucking deviants who have perfectly working bodies who change their sex using the most unnatural methods possible. Gender is not a choice dawg.
well i never really understood rugby but you don't see me going on about it.
like fuck you rugby players what's the big deal? it's like football except you use your feet more and i think you're from austraillia. and because i don't get it i guess i'm going to say hateful things and write poitnless posts on 4chan about how shit you are.
i mean no one's born a rugby player, and they could have gone with the more logical choice of soccer. soccer's the big sport everywhere except in the americas, right? and then you have central and south america where it still is the big thing. so i guess it's just north america that isn't into soccer but rugby is still a thing in australlia.
>makes an tangent about a sport that literally has nothing to do with the subject matter
>complaining about someone being abstract
Are you serious?
You made a completely nonsensical example and I called you out on it. The person who isn't ready for discussion is you.
I'm assuming you were trying to get the point across that trans people don't effect me so why should I care, but when a transman is using the woman's bathroom and vice versa it definitely affects me.
i was being facetious and also am drunk. wanna fight about it?
but also i'm so tired of defending myself. i just want to live a relatively normal life and pee when i feel i have to. instead it's bitchy pretty girls making an issue of me peeing. and i included examples of using the men's room to express why i don't do that anymore. one way or another it's very stressful when i have to pee and i have to pee a lot.
you can say i brought this all on myself by being trans. and i don't really care to argue the point because it's tiring. i shouldn't have to constantly defend myself and explain why my feelings and concerns are legitimate. yet here we are.
i want to lead a harmless existence and maybe someday make enough money to move out of my dad's house. big dreams. but it's constant opposition from strangers and i'm crying now. fuck.
Look, I'm not in your head so I can't relate, maybe you do have legitimate problems...but you had to be aware that this kind of process was going to get negative reactions.
Men dressup as women for halloween as a joke, you had to see that shit coming.
Sometimes you gotta pick your battles, if you have an inner hell at least you can conceal it, having an outer hell means it's laid bare for everybody
i guess so. i'm not pretending i'm facing odds like the people that went through concentration camps or anything it's just i really hate myself and wish i had the inner strength to do well in life. i'm scared to go outside a lot of the time and it hurts when people say things that make me want to not be there anymore. here anymore. i think about suicide a lot. suicide is easy to romanticize.
what are you even talking about? i try very hard to not be noticed by other people. wear plain clothes and don't speak. it works a lot of the time but when it doesn't i feel like crying. i cry a lot.
Dunno what to tell you homie. I think gender reassignment is a mistake, considering most of your peers attempt/succeed at killing themselves. That being said, just pick a bathroom and stick to it.
i like how your opinions are baseless and ignorant? oh god this is my life. i'm talking to uninformed morons on 4chan and hoping that it will make me feel better. that my life will somehow be easier to manage after such an experience.
i really wish i had friends.
that's the hope. really. to pee without it being an issue. but instead i have girls physically standing in my way telling me that my urinating is a problem they won't stand for.
i think i'm developing a complex about my urinary tract.
>i like how your opinions are baseless and ignorant?
I'm not the one complaining about my bathroom conundrums on 4chan either though. I feel for you, because I'm sure that enduring this kind of stress about dumb shit isn't fun, and my points are neither here nor there. Godspeed, hopefully your thread gives you the catharsis you seek.
>when a transman is using the woman's bathroom and vice versa it definitely affects me.
How, exactly? I don't even have a dog in this fight, but it really does seem like you just enjoy being a sanctimonious asshole. I'd love for you to explain how you'd actually be affected if a woman started using the mens' room, or vice versa. There are unisex bathrooms everywhere and nobody makes a big deal of it. Is the bathroom thing really all you've got?
it really doesn't. i think i'm going to kill myself soon, if i'm being honest. the statistic is said to be around 40%, those trans that have attempted suicide. i'm not even sure where to statistic is from and it's misquoted all the itme. even i know that.
it would be nice to talk about things but instead it's like oh fuck you trans isn't a thing and you brought everything upon yourself. you probably would have raped that bitchy girl because of your penis and she was fearful for her life how dare you.
i'm probably destined to die misunderstood and alone. another statistic to misquote and go on about unintelligibly. like hey that one trans girl was a trans girl and she was sad and died. so trans is wrong and you should be your biological sex as a gender because science.
and then other trans people are sad and bitchy girls give them shit for wanting to pee. bitchy white girls who are pretty are american heroes for standing up for what it right and proper.
>Why can't you act like a fag and have a dick at the same time?
oh i do.
Hey it's your right if you want to live life with people judging you all the time then that's cool not saying everyone is gonna hate but we still live in a ignorant age. People say that pure not right in the head but we reached an age where it doesn't mater what biological sex you're born with..kind of hypocritical when people say you're not right in the head when they themselves aren't aware of what a tranny is .. Oh well good luck I'm not tran but I support u
i actually posted this
honestly, i do feel a bit of an asshole/ignorant with that i was posting, so im hoping someone there could better explain trans stuff in detail for me
>admitted i was inappropriate on 4chan
>I'm so misunderstood!
The problem with trannies is that they can't actually articulate what their problem is. They want to be perceived as women, I suppose, but then why make that your whole purpose in life? What about being seen as a woman is so important? Some people live their entire lives in wheelchairs or in shitty minimum wage jobs and you somehow manage to problemetize having fully functional reproductive organs? What is the deal?
That's cool. I don't know why you need to understand it just to treat a person with basic respect, though. You're gonna meet a lot of people who do a lot of things you don't understand, and you can't just be a prick about it until someone explains it to you
It's like, a person comes in complaining about a shitty day, and your response is "THESE ARE MY UNSOLICITED GENERAL OPINIONS ABOUT THE GROUP OF PEOPLE YOU REPRESENT"
Sorry brah, sometimes you have to play the hand you're dealt. And "because science" is an especially specious argument since it's science that's even allowed you gender reassignment in the first place. But honestly, it's none of my deal. Good luck out there, truly.
i totally get the concept that people should be left to live their own lives, and i respect it, i dont go around bashing strangers.
but trans people are scary, in a "i did this to myself purposefully, unnaturally" kind of way.
you came on an advice board to complain about a shitty day and didn't ask for advice.
really, it's more like you walked into the school cafeteria and plopped down next to a bunch of strange kids and started bawwing about your shitty day, then a person in that group told you to fuck off.
are you new here? I can tell you're new here.
my problem very specifically is that people are hostile toward me and make me feel weird about peeing. i really don't care if someone perceives me as a woman so long as they're not actively being awful toward me and making me feel like shit. indifference would be so fucking wonderful. i long for day when no one gives a shit.
honestly i have no idea what you're talking about. i work a shitty mimimum wage job and it sucks. i'm not ranting about my functioning reproductive organs. they're not functioning so well anymore but i kinda just mentioned them in passing in OP. why are you making a huge deal out of my penis?
i just want to fucking pee without it being a huge confrontational thing. is that too much to ask?
Well you can either deal with the fact that some pretty girls are mean, not just to you and not just because your are trans by the way those types of bitches will pick on anyone they can, by standing up for yourself and not being a pussy. Or you could attach a hose to your dick, pee in a bottle, and throw it at people. I like the pee bottle idea.
Seriously, people are dicks to people. If it wasnt because you were trans, its because you are short, or slutty or blonde, or red, or not them. Get use to people like that like everyone else has to, they usually fuck off if you aggressively ignore them or say something back. Seriously just say, "fuck of outta my way Palin/wonderbra/vagina face" contuine about you business like they arent there and you're good. Dont let people push you around.
i like that you're actually offering advice and not giving me shit for being trans and wanting to like start something.
when i said, "i'm not here for yuo" that was me being assertive and strong. but she still stood there staring at me and i had to awkwardly walk around her which made the statement kinda lose most of its assertiveness.
idk. i'm really about to give up on school. if people like that don't want me there i probable just don't belong. maybe i don't deserve to have a job alongside people like that. i think about suicide so often it's probably not a good thing.
1. You can stop taking hormones and advertizing yourself as some one with deep identity issues
2. Deal with people being uncomfortable that the opposite sex may be in the wrong bathroom. You can't blame them, really, the seperation exists for a reason.
3. Drop out, be miserable about yourself, etc.
Personally I'd go with the first option but it's up to you.
i'm not trying to advertise myself. i mean it'd be great if some cute guy noticed me and decided that we should be together or something, but i actively try to go unnoticed by those around me. it feels safer.
sometimes i wish i could just be alone all of the time. i could be as feminine and girly as i wanted without fear of someone noticing and trying to stop it or tell me how inappropriate and wrong i am.
dealing with it is what i'm trying to do. it's difficult when it happens so uh. clearly? fuck i'm drunk and can't vocabulary. like they're so direct and serious about it.
"i have a problem with you being trans and in my bathroom."
it probably makes her uncomfortable but i keep my head down and try to ignore everyone else in there. why can't she do the same? fuck i hate myself.
If you quit they win. People don't want others to succeed, more if the other person is different then they are. By going to school and "competiting" with her, you are threatening her self perceived position. She being a "good person" is in the same class as one of those "bad people"? That means she's not as super awesome as she thought(oh no) not if you are doing the same thing as her and not failing, and her tiny little brain can't handle that. Same reason people are hostile here.
>A trans person on the board I use to waste time? Man she's sure a failure huh guys? I promise its not just my own insecurities!
These types thrive on hate. Its not good to let them dictate your happiness. I'm sorry to hear you have suicidal thoughts. I highly suggest you seek help, don't let some after school special level villians win. You said you have free sessions, use them please.
Because a man in the women's bathroom is most likely there for questionable reasons; at least it's reasonable to assume as much.
Why is it so important for you to be girly? When I do something I don't make an effort to be masculine or otherwise. And if you don't make en effort about it, why is it necessary that you wear women's clothes? Why can't you just limit yourself to girly behavior which is natural and effortless to you anyways?
thank you so much. i planned to make an appointment for the counselor thing today, but after what happened with the girl it was easier to drink and be sad. i think i'll do that. i really don't know what i'm supposed to do here. there's a loud girl in my class that needs to pee at the same time i do and i absolutely DREAD this situation. how am i supposed to succeed when i'm spending the entire time worrying about this? i really might just stop going. idk.
why is it reasonable to assume that? and i'm not a man. also why are you making so many assumptions about me?
i am girly whether i like it or not. and i wear girly clothes at home alone when i feel safe. out in public, at school? i'm dressed in androgynous clothes. it's safer and i feel like maybe less of an affront to the senses of normal people. plus it helps me blend in with my surroundings, or so i hope.
i feel like everyone in this thread feeling offended at my being trans (most of the posters) really don't have any idea what this thread is about. i'm not making an effort to be "in your face" and edgy. kinda just want to survive and pee without people hating me for it. and making me hate myelf for it.
i never set out to offend or freak out anyone. it's not like, "fuck you, i'm gonna use your bathrooms no matter what you say!" so much as it's please don't look at me please don't look at me please don't look at me.
It's reasonable because that's the way most men are. You might not be a man according to the radical left's definition but you are according to the conventional definition, which most people (like those you encounter in the bathroom) follow. I guess at this point it's an ideological thing.
I'm just trying to help you. It's one thing to say "yeah you're right and they're wrong! Necessarily! Fuck the haters!" And another to try and find a solution, which may or may not be compatible with what you believe to be truth.
Anyways, is there any real reason why you can't make a compromise with society and behave like a girl but look like a guy and use the guy's room?
the only reason i'm using the girl's room is that i encounter less weird reactions there than the men's room. the last time i used a men's room (not the times talked about in OP) some guy a movie theater laughed and said, "line's too long in the lady's room, yeah?" and i looked at him weird and ran into a stall.
but now i'm getting shit from a girl that stares at me in class and i think is very interested in me because i'm trans. i bet things would be going very differently had i not sat next to her the first day. it was so weird with her staring at me that entire time. already this semester there was another encounter with a girl and we did that awkward "oh sorry i'm in your way let me go the other way" shuffling thing and she apologized without really looking at me. that's what happens most of the time.
but guys see me going in their bathroom and i happen to look generally female and they're like hey that's a girl. more than anything i want to be not noticed, while also feeling comfortable with myself. should i cut my hair short and bind my breasts hoping to pass as male?
i feel close to a panic attack
>Everyone is the problem not me: The Thread
Thanks for the insight into the psyche of a trans-critter. Not that any of this was surprising
I think you should find a way to pass as either male or female, not in between. We all have to deal with existing in society, which isn't always convenient. I'm sure many wheelchair bound people get frustrated about how many stairs there are between them and their destinations but they learn to live alongside with what most people are accustomed to doing. It might be the same thing with bathrooms. Try to adapt to society because you can't just reject it unless you want to live in the woods.
passing as female was the hope. it's turning out to be much harder than previously thought.
and i can't pass as male anymore.
idk. the more i think about things the more i just want to kill myself. it's so hard doing the homework like this. i'll probably fail all my classes and end up a failure anyway. why not commit suicide? honestly.
i'll probably never have a boyfriend or be loved. at this point it's just survival. and i'm not doing so well.
Honestly I suggest cutting your hair and just wearing a sweater and jeans. That doesn't sound like a bad life to me, having short hair. Don't you agree? Lots of girls have short or boyish hair. You might want to reconsider taking hormones as well if you want.
You said you look androgynous, which I believe a lot of gay guys are into. I wouldn't worry about that yet anyways and just focus on my homework.
intersex people aren't born with both. they're often born with either a vagina, virilized clitoris that resembles a penis (the clitoris is a penis homologue) and streak gonads or a vagina without a uterus
In any case go see a therapist about it. You don't have to do everything I say. But I don't see the problem with being a girly looking guy going into the guy's bathroom, as long as you are dressed like a guy.
but i like my hair. it's the only part of me that i really like. i work so hard on my hair.
if it were only homework i'd be a lot happier. instead it's interactions and talking to each other. starting to think i can't make it. or maybe the alcohol is making me emo.
guess i need to just make it through this assignment and continue on tomorrow.
i look like a girl at a glance. no matter how you glance. and i don't want to look like a guy. i don't want to wear guy's clothes.
maybe i just don't belong anywhere. i don't expect anyone to understand.
I think you're making this harder than it has to be. It's just hair and clothes. You're contemplating suicide over hair and clothes.
But whatever, the point is to live with society and gender distinctions --not outside if it, because you will be seen as different if you go out of your way to be different.
it's not hair and clothes i'm contemplating suicide over. it's so much more, and i doubt you'll ever really understand.
i'm not trying to live outside of gender distinctions. really i'm not.
So which bathroom do you recommend? Because if you're going by genitals (which is kinda perverted and shallow) she doesn't belong in the girls. But if you're going by soul/identity, she doesn't belong in the boys.
I don't see how anyone can really argue against either