>women want to complain about their easy problems
>men want to give simple solutions
> I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO SOLVE MY PROBLEM I JUST WANTED TO VENT
How are these just "differences"?
The female method is clearly
from "how to be a 3 percent man" by corey wayne (free on scribd), page 203
Women aren't morons, guys. They know the answer most of the time to the problems they talk about. They don't need some dumbass dude coming in and giving them the obvious answer.
Imagine your friend calling you up:
>hey man my car broke down, can you pick me up?
>you need a new car
>yeah I know, but I don't have a ride right now
>you know why you don't have a ride? because your car is broken down. I'm telling you, you need a new car.
>dude I need a ride back from the mechanics
>WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID? YOU NEED A NEW CAR. WHY DONT YOU LISTEN? YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT
except replace "pick me up from the mechanics" with "support me"
This is how people who aren't fucking autists understand it.
I am a guy and I like to vent some stuff too (it helps to clear my mind) and I find annoying when people give simple solutions because I already know what should I do, this is not a feminine trait is childish more than anything in my opinion.
This has always been a big difference in how men and women feel better about issues. In general, when it comes to venting, men do it when they want help with an issue. Women do it to relieve stress and bond, not to ask for help over an issue they already know how to resolve. You could be a brick wall for all she cares. She just wants someone to listen and make her feel like her and her issues matter.
>Support me is vague.
It's really not. It essentially means, "Be emotionally supportive." Hear them out and share in their suffering by saying things like, "Wow, that really sucks." and asking questions to get a better understanding of the situation.
It's like people have forgotten how to socialize.
Also skanks are like that. Real ladies and kind and considerate to other human beings and not trying to put a freaking triangle on things. Are really cool people. Besides they are tired of the guys we hate. The fucking douchebags.
>specific request in a specific concrete example of a situation
>general advice for what women generally want in an argument
do you really think there's an answer as to what all women specifically want you do do when they are complaining about something?
you forget we're speaking with autists. They're literally socially retarded. You gotta go slow.
But it never helps? Its ok that we are different and all that but solving a problem will always be the best solution, both mentally and physically. Objectively it is the better way to deal with an issue.
>But it never helps?
I said, "In general." I'm sure there are men and women out there that do the opposite, and personally, I keep my issues to myself because I know how to fix them and I don't need/want emotional support. But because I know how to help both types of people, I usually end up becoming the "Emotional Secretary" of my friends. Generally, guys want advice and don't want too much of the, "Oh, that sucks!" crap (because they don't need to be told that sucks, they just want advice). And the women generally know what they need to do to fix situations, they just need help gaining the will to do it by having someone talk out the situation and sharing feelings.
>Objectively it is the better way to deal with an issue.
Sure. But it's not always what the person is looking for. If you value them then being irritating, when you know that an answer isn't what they're looking for, really isn't conducive to keeping friends.
never been able to wrap my head around this one honestly.
>i have have chlamydia
>verbalize my woes
>aw that sucks, you poor thing
>now i feel better
>i have have chlamydia
>take a one time dose of meds
>ok ill do that
>now i feel better
i will never understand how the former makes someone feel better. no solution, no progress, continued suffering.
this example is retarded
"come pick me up" is the solution
"YOU NEED A NEW CAR" is not a solution
your example is the total opposite of the real life example. in the real world it would be:
"i cant get to work, I need a new car :("
"well, I can give you a ride"
"jesus christ dont you ever just listen? i need a new car, support me and make me feel like my problems matter"
"you... you dont want a solution to your immediate problem?"
"no, im good with being stranded and complaining about it to you and increasing your levels of stress as a result"
what youre getting at is that the man would try to explain that she's a lazy sack of shit that no-called/no-showed so many times at her last, good paying job that she got fired, and now she works at a shit place and thus cant afford to fix her car, and she already knows this but still feels shes entitled to complain about her woes even though she really isnt because she knows why she fucked up and chose to do nothing (good) about it.
then don't sweat it too much. a guide like that is for guys who are truly mystified by most female behavior and are incapable of building an intuitive knowledge base with experience.
if your guy doesn't look for material like that to relate with you, then this kind of stuff likely doesnt apply.
Look man. A lot of people not only women need to vent first before their mind is clear enough to work on a solution.
>fuck i'm so goddamn mad I didn't make this year's football selection again.
>well you should've trained harder man and you could also work on your running skills.
Even if you are right. It is not what the person at that time needs. Let them vent be understanding and once a person has calmed down if they are feeling like it you can share some insight about what you think is a good way to deal with the situation wich could be anything not just my example. And sometimes people dont want advice so just comfort them and shut up afterwards.
Sometimes people just want to vent without you trying to fix their goddamn problems. It might be annoying to you, but too bad. In polite society, you just nod and say "that sucks, I'm sorry."
If it really bothers you that much, tell them to fuck off and enjoy getting them out of your life. But if you want any sort of relationship, you're going to have to put up with bullshit like this.