How do men feel about women who have had FWBs or casual sex relationships?

I'm a guy who's 20 years old and a virgin. It probably sounds a bit gay but I'm a virgin by choice, I'm actually attractive enough that I've had opportunities to have sex before and turned them down. I see sex as both a physical experience and an emotional/spiritual experience. I don't think fucking around is really a healthy way to live, It clearly gives some people self confidence and some loving attention, but I think that over time the initial thrill of it wears off and it just becomes something meaningless. I want to only have one partner, and have it be a person who I truly love, not some moderately attractive slut who I met in class. for me, a women being sexually open and having had multiple past partners with no romantic correlation is a big red flag. Call me old fashioned.

>>16704102
>I want to only have one partner
are you waiting til marriage?

>2 YEARS!
Try 24.

>>16704156
Are you an old man or a virgin?

>>16704153
Oops, this was meant for >>16704116

This is kind of the wrong place to ask. Beware the legion of redpills and virgin frogs.

Anyway.

I was abstinent 'til i was 24 (as I've had a girl drop herself in my lap, literally try to pull me in to her bed at the end of the night, and I made a conscious decision to turn her--and others like her--down). For me it was just about wanting to be with someone who was more than just pretty and who I could share an actual connection with.

Even so, I wouldn't give a fuck what your history is. Your history is yours, and it's part of what made you who you are. If I love you, I can't knock that.

In fact my first love was actually someone who had a pretty... let's say vividly active sexual history. See the above.

If you feel like you want to explore, just be smart and be safe. If you feel like you don't, that's ok too. Either way, anyone who shames you for that, fuck em. Don't let fear of shame prevent you from living your your life how you want to live it.

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>>16704102

>>16704159
Doesn't matter. You want to be a slut, so that's what you are. Go ride the chad carousel until your skin melts away and your sperm-addled brain can't conceive of anything more abstract than finding a beta to enslave with your chimera child.

>>16704102
it's a big turn off

a combination of the threat posed to a relationship by the other man, and the knowledge that you can just have sex and not really care about someone

I've been seeing a girl and heard they had FWB's and I dumped them, I'm not having it speculated in public if my girlfriend is sleeping around

>>16704116
Same. I wish there were more guys, or people in general, like you.

It depends on what kind of man you want to marry. If what you are looking for is a bitter virgin from 4chan, it's a turnoff. If you are looking for a more mature and experienced guy, it's not a big issue.

>>16704171
>>16704190
haha, I'm guessing the virgin frogs are like >>16704182 who hate women who would never fuck them anyway

It's a big question for me though. It's between living life at its fullest (since we could die any day why die sexually frustrated) and waiting so it's (perceived) more valuable in the future..

>>16704173
I actually don't know who that is

>>16704184
What if she had just one FWB?

Just got out of a FWB relationship with someone.

>she said she's had MANY sexual encounters.(never asked how many)

>her co worker and ex co worker who introduced me both said she had a lot of guys "talking" to her all the time.

>was actually a really great person, would've definitely had a serious relationship with her which was the goal.


>dropped her because I'd never be able to trust her, yes FWB but knowing she can fuck another person anyday is no good.
OP. Depends on the guy, and how much of a sloot you wanna be. That question will always come up at some point.

>>16704190
Kek, not really. The general population doesn't find promiscuity attractive. What's very interesting is that they've found it's even generally unattractive in males.

Not to mention that people with lower partner counts and who wait longer to have sex in a relationship have lower divorce rates and higher relationship-satisfaction and health rates.

>>16704202
If I'm using a person purely for sexual needs, it would be just one, forever or until I'm no longer single. Which would raise my number to 2. That shouldn't be so bad right?

>>16704218
Not that anon, but for most it's not all about just numbers. It's about type of relationships too.

>>16704205
OP here, and if it's the count then that's no problem. I'd limit myself to one FWB forever. Concerned more with how the quality of that affects future relationships.

For example, one of my friends lost her virginity to an FWB so from that info would that make her less relationship material to possible bf with just 1 partner who was casual? As opposed to a woman who has had 5 real boyfriends so it's committed sex with 5 people.

>>16704201

Feeling dissatisfied with your past, wondering what if, and having regrets is the number one thing that will mess you over in a long term relationship.

virgin frogs and the like are of the opinion that ignorance is bliss. That if you never know anything else ever existed, you can't miss it. They blindly believe in that.

But curiosity still occurs.

But if you've lived your life to the fullest, and you know full well what's out there, it's a lot easier to say, "Hey, messing around is fun, but i've experienced enough of life to actually have formed an opinion and be able to be discerning, and this, this is something real. Something satisfying, and something special I would never trade anything for else."

Is it foolproof? No. But at least you don't regret anything; and honestly, that's probably one of the most important things in life.

Just my 2c anyway.

>>16704205
Ah, here we go, the teachman "study" brigade is here. Virgins "by choice" who speak for the entire male population.

>>16704182
bitter virgin detected

>>16704102
as long as you're safe and don't have too many partners, it wouldn't matter to any women-respecting, secure and confident man. i've had 2 gfs and 2 ONS in my 25 years and no girl has shamed me for it so far.

>>16704218

FWB dump anon.
Questions to ask yourself

>Would you be comfortable with that person having sex with someone who isn't you? Which would be acceptable because it's nothing serious.

> Are you going to be friends with this person or strictly just sex?

>if feelings get involved on either end and they don't match up. Will you be upset?

Know what you want and why you're getting yourself into. Think of how you would see the experience in the past, present, and future.

>>16704272
Hmm you're right, I suppose a big part of it too is not getting emotionally involved. If I can actually do the FWB thing. I'd prefer it to be someone I'm friends with because I would have to trust that person too... I have another friend who lost her virginity to an FWB (acquaintance really) and he secretly taped it and sent it out to his friends.

>>16704227
Something to think about indeed. I am a very regret-prone person and I feel like my youth needs to be spent on things I'll probably not be able to do when I'm older. (this is also affecting me on the career-level, should I experiment with other fields/industries, etc. lol)

>>16704245
Thanks for the reassurance. For sure I would limit the quantity.

>>16704102
Male reporting in.
Most guys on here would call me a male slut, I've had FWBs and relationships here and there. I am very loyal to a girl I'm in a relationship with and never cheated - even if I have had the chance to. That is, because I know I can find someone if I need to within say half a year.

But having this doesn't actually imply I will cheat, it's quite the opposite. A relationship benefits from this since you won't stick to someone you don't love or who doesn't suit you. In general I'm way more loving, because I chose my girl over others I could've had. She's precious.

The general idea that a girl who has FWBs would more likely cheat is wrong. This is not connected, it just says she likes having sex (And no girl will fuck a dude she doesn't like characterise). But liking sex does not equal needing sex.

>inb4 generalizing your own experience and projecting them on others

That's a valid point, but then again so do you guys projecting your own opinion (that girls who have sex are sluts and "ride the cock carousel) on women. Cheating comes from weak will or lack of moral standards. A FWB does not equal those though. It's a conscious decision.

tl;Dr: OP, I wouldn't judge you for fwb. I'd maybe do so if you cheated, but that's not the same - coming from someone who actually has a bit of experience.

>>16704102
good for a night but wouldn't wife

Hey, I'm 30yr old experienced guy... Sex is fun. As long as anyone else involved knows where you stand on things there is no harm in having fun, doesn't have to be all serious. There are always 2 extreme answers to this kind of question. It's always either of the following; 1. Absolutely not - This, in my experience comes from people who are deeply insecure, traditional or have religious beliefs that means their life choices are directed by their faith.

2. Be a slut if you want to - This kind of reaction comes, in my experience from people who, have no boundaries, have attachment issues, lack self love and respect etc.

I think the answer i would give is balance. Just because you like to have sex doesn't make you a slut, or a bad person, it makes you human. But that doesn't mean it is necessarily healthy for you to go around and bang every person in sight.

Allow yourself to be free to make informed choices that enable you to have fun without comprising your safety and your self respect.

I have been in relationships girls who have been with multiple partners and also girls who have had FWB's in the past. In my opinion and experience what someone has done before shouldn't effect what happens now, if that were the case where would we all be!?

On a personal level, it didn't affect me at all. In fact it can be a good thing. I found talking about sex and trying new things with these chicks a lot more easy going and fun and expermental which was a plus for me. I came from a very traditional religious background, so it was quite liberating to be honest... Enough about me now, i say go for it with the above in mind.

Anyway that is my 2 pennies, hope that helps. If any of the points made are not applicable or unhelpful, please disregard at your leisure.

Kind regards

>>16704245
>bitter virgin detected

So fucking what? You think people can put up with that shit for years and not be bitter? Getting your feelings wrecked leaves a mark you fucking twat, real people feel shit you fucking autistic cunt.

And what goes around comes around.

>>16704485
> letting emotions guide your opinions

What could possibly go wrong?

>>16704485
>what goes around comes around
>ya cause OP is the exact same woman who hurt you in the past
why are you so mad? what happened to you in the past that you can't have normal conversations with strangers on the internet without making a tantrum like an incontinent child?

>>16704102
>How do men feel about women who have had FWBs or casual sex relationships?
Id have a casual relationship and sleep with you. But never marry you. And would probably end it before the relationship got serious.

Depends on what you want. Theres no going back once you do. If you want to go whoring around like the rest of society dont expect the people who didnt whore around to love you. If you sleep around casually expect to marry someone with a similar sexual history and moral integrity as you.
I wouldnt want to date you and theres no reason you should want to date someone whos going to see you as a slut. So its best if we dont date.

>>16704227
Oh yes cause life is it about sex from what your saying, might as well throw out everything an be a caveman. Lost my virginity at 13 then never wanted sex again cause it's nothing but an impulse an people who have no control don't interest me

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#nohymennodiamond
#MGTOW2016

>>16704102
Whores. No respect for them personally.

>>16704201
You said it yourself. Do you value yourself.

>>16704533

Life isn't about sex.
Life is about not living with regrets.

If you regret never perusing a once in a lifetime job opportunity, then that might bubble up and cause problems.
If you regret not having enough sex, then that might also bubble up and cause problems.

Impulse control and restraint is important. But knowing how to actually live your life is equally important.

>>16704553
Not the anon you're replying to, but you seem to only think regret applies to things you didn't do, when you absolutely can regret things you did do. So keep that in mind too.

>>16704531
>Id have a casual relationship and sleep with you. But never marry you.

>If you sleep around casually expect to marry someone with a similar sexual history and moral integrity as you

Kek

>>16704553
Life is about consequences. You pick actions willing to accept any consequence thrown at you. Then you can live without any regrets.
If you know the sleeping around will make other people see you unfavorably when it comes to marriage and you still sleep around, you cannot complain about being seen unfavorably.
Live life so that you will never regret anything. Be willing to accept any consequence of your actions.

>>16704565
A casual relationship is not the same as sleeping around. I dont have sex with anyone until 4 months into the relationship. Normally break up before then. If we go 4 months its serious enough to have sex. But marriage is a different story. Relationships are about so much more than marriage and sex.

>>16704577
Was that reply meant for me or..?

Last time I have sex was back in 2008.
Stop complaining.

>>16704580
Meant for >>16704570

>>16704102
For the love of God, your sex life is no one's business but your own. Unless you advertise your sex life to any and all interested, you're good.

Now go out there and get laid.

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>>16704102
If the guy hasn't ever had FWB's, he will probably consider you a slut.

If the guy has had FWB's, he will consider you a normal human being.

>conclusion:
>guys hate to feel inferior to other guys who have casually fucked their fwbs

>>16704613
>For the love of God, your sex life is no one's business but your own.
If you cant share your past you shouldnt marry that person. Thats how I would treat any person that I was marrying.
If they cant look at my past and see thats its how I got to be the person I am and accept that then we shouldnt be married.
The fact that you feel the need to hide things just proves its something you shouldnt do.
Like you dont apply for a job and hide your history from them when they ask. Dont treat your spouse with less respect than your treat your employer.

>>16704572
>Life is about consequences

Aaaand that's how people end up repressed and bitter as fuck. Because they put themselves in little boxes out of fear of actually living.

Of course you have to be mindful of the fact that there's consequences, but letting a negative emotion, particularly fear, dictate what you do in life might make for a pretty sad existence.

>>16704102

You sound pretty young, so I'll try to not be too judgmental but basically ... who the fuck cares? If a guy wants to judge you for your sexual history, do you really think that you'll want to be in a long term relationship with that guy?

Instead of asking what men feel about it (which btw, I love friends who are into FWB's), ask if you want it .. and what you think about men who don't want you to have casual sex.

>>16704624
>Because they put themselves in little boxes out of fear of actually living.
Fear is a good thing. Its a warning letting you know that the things you value, that your prioritize and in danger. Like marriage for one thing. It lets you know that theres a consequence you dont want. When Im afraid of something I take a hard look at it and ask my self and Im willing to live with that choice.
Its not dictating, its understanding that life is about consequences. there are no second chances. Live your life so that you never regret anything. If you want to escape from that box so badly do it. And never look back questioning why people dont want to marry you. Only a child wouldnt be able to see long term consequences. If it were an immediate consequence youd probably say the opposite.

>>16704627
Obviously she still wants to be in a relationship with someone who values sex. She doesnt want to rule those guys out because shes horny.

>>16704102
I would date, i would never not consider them for permanent relationship but it would influence the way i look at them. it would make it hard to have sex with them as sex for me is personal. there are many more problems with this type lifestyle but like guy said above keep your past to your self it no ones business.

I will always feel comfortable in the range of (number of partners I have had × 0.66) +/- (number of partners I have had ×1 3). Basically the older I get and more experience I have the more acceptable I will be to a wider range of partners.

>>16704596
You're backpedaling,
son. You literally said "I'd have casual sex with you, but not marry you" and then "people who have casual sex marry other people who have casual sex".

>>16704102
>How do men feel about women who have had FWBs or casual sex relationships?
I don't care about it.
>Is it something that puts a woman off the marriage material section?
No

It will probably make you a more versatile partner. So go get yourself some fuckbuddies (use protection tho) until you find the man you'll spend the rest of your days with.

>>16704667
No, I literally said Id have a casual relationship with you, but not marry you.
Try reading. A casual relationship isnt fwb. its what I call any relationship that doesnt have to exact purpose of getting married.

>>16704329
>underrated post

>>16704673
>Id have a casual relationship
>and sleep with you
>But never marry you

was this aimed at me?

>>16704746
nothing contradicts>>16704577
Marriage is a no go but I dont enter every relationship looking for marriage