Or maybe how to find a normal relationship so I can have sex without risking STDs as much? It seems crazy hard to find boyfriends if you're trans in a conservative area. Help I'm so lonely and might have HIV maybe.
>and might have HIV maybe.
Don't panic, not everyone who sleeps around immediately gives you STDs. First things first, get tested. Secondly, use protection you moron. Sleeping around is not a huge deal, just don't do anything too risky. As for a "normal" relationship, that's not easy for anyone nowadays, it'll probably be even harder for you. Find people who genuinely like you as a person, not because of your gender or sex or whatever. If that's impossible in your area then consider moving.
Just be open about it, also Bi people still exist. Thinking that only freaks and weirdos could be attracted to a trans person is kinda silly.
It's a hard fucking road. You're a minority in a minority group that is incredibly small, by choice. That means your pool of available partners is also smaller than average. To increase that pool, you have to find a community where that pool is larger.
"Get tested" and "use a condom" are pretty straightforward pieces of advice. As for the rest, no we don't know how it is to be trans and no we don't know what exactly the issues are, you said that you live in a region where you have issues with being open about who you are, so we told you to maybe move or try to find people in different areas where that's less of an issue.
Not the poster you're replying to, but I kind of agree. It's harsh but it's the truth.
Regardless of what kind of trans OP is, he's still a trans...it's the biggest possibly turn off for men.
>cant have kids
>weird physical features that share traits of both sexes
>you question your masculinity constantly
Definitely not relationship material, I'd rather date a single mom and they aren't much better either.
One and Done.
That can't be true in all cases, right? I'm so tired of being fucked once and then that's it. And I kinda want kids too someday. We can adopt. Right?
There's no reason to be so mean about things. It's fine if you're not into trans girls but some people are hopefully..
I'm not a fetish though. Just a normal person with regular human desires and emotions? Others trans people have boyfriends, I think. I mean some have to. So how do I become one of them?
no, you're not normal. You're disfigured with a mental illness and you act like a girl despite having a dick.
most people are turned off by all those things, but there are some who fetishize them, the other trans people with boyfriends just happened to find someone who was turned on by those things.
Well I'm not mentally ill. But if I were there are lots of like bipolar, depressed, even schizophrenic people that have boyfriends. So yeah.
Okay I'm not disfigured, either. I wish I could have a normal conversation about how to improve my life without it turning into the transphobic nonsense that seems to follow me around. I'm a pretty okay person and you don't need to say mean things toward me to have like an interesting conversation.
>Okay I'm not disfigured, either
that a fact? Well good job beating the odds.
still doesn't change the fact that the only people who will be able to get over you having a dick are chasers
You said other things, too. And you're not even right about the hormones. You don't know what their hormone levels are like. Mine are in the normal female range now, and were in the normal male range before starting HRT. Neat thing about the endocrinologist is that you get all this data from blood samples.
I don't understand what you mean. What odds did I beat? Most people aren't disfigured, trans or no.
And I bet someone could love me for who I am. They don't need to fetishize the trans stuff and I can be just a really wonderful person? But I don't know how to find him.
First, get yourself tested. Yesterday if not sooner.
Next, although it is 2016, consider dating only folks from larger towns. Small town drama can be life threatening. Don't run the risk.
After that, find other trans folks in relationships to hang with. They almost always have single friends looking for real relationships.
Potentially lastly, find a job if you don't already have one. Work relationships can help you be more yourself more often. You don't realize how much you have been someone else around potentially ignorant family members until you are in a sphere where people only know you as you.
It's too early to get tested. I'm worried about it but need to wait a long time before a positive can even show up.
Have a job but am very shy and awkward and quiet and weird. And I've never known a trans person before irl. They probably don't exist here. I live in a pretty big city. We have like 60,000 people.
OP...you're over romanticizing this.
I can understand why it's hard for you and it's definitely not going to get any easier. We're all analyzing this based on reality and you're ignoring the "reality" of being a transexual.
I can admit I don't fully understand it...but in my head, a gay man would be okay dating a transexual. You're asking why can't hetero-men feel attracted to trans-women and you want to find a guy like that...Truth is, the odds are slim. You say someone doesn't "need to fetishize the trans stuff" when in truth...they really do -.- and I'm sure you're a wonderful person but I'm afraid even that isn't enough to spark an attraction...especially having to overcome that sort of boundary.
And maybe get tested before trying to find the love of your life...
>love you for who you are
Bitch you couldn't even love yourself an got changed. Homosexuals are normal, being bisexual is okay, but think you can simple be a female cause you want to be is a mental problem he'll I have more respect for drag Queens least they know their a guy.
It is a felony to transmit HIV without letting your sexual partner know beforehand, whether or not you know you have it. If you don't tested you could have an angry one night stand suing the dick off and maybe prison time, where I'm sure you'll get all the attention you're craving.
I never said he had to be straight. Gay or bi is fine as long as he's cute and a good person and he loves me. And I'm not ignoring any reality. That's why I'm asking for advice on how to make it happen maybe.
Wow this is even worse than the last post. You think I'd like prison because of the attention I'd get there? :(
I don't want to transmit HIV to anyone. But I literally cannot test for it without waiting some weeks. Can you people understand that? I'm going to get tested, but not until I actually can.
So don't fuck anyone till you've get tested! My god you're fucking retarded. Don't have sex! Don't FUCKING have sex. Is that simple enough for you? Don't have sex.
Also the only people that like trannins like them as a sexual fetish. You've glorified your own gender identity so much that you're now defined by it. If you wanted a meaningful relationship with a man you should have just settled for being gay instead of using taxpayer money to satisfy a mental illness.
>people dont really see trannys as people.
At least they still identify as people. Whereas you have decided to have your own special snowflake definition on what makes someone a person.
Everyone just stop posting this autistic fag won't listen to a thing we say
Okay, well...then go mingle! Go to a place where gay/bi people congregate and meet someone! I don't quite understand why you need advice to make that happen...Just go out there and meet people =D
But yeah...wait for the test, first. I just sense your urgency at trying to find someone. Just understand that being/feeling lonely is completely fine.
>It is a felony to transmit HIV without letting your sexual partner know beforehand, whether or not you know you have it.
Er, nope. Only if you've been diagnosed and therefore know you have it. Or where specifically do they criminalize unknowingly transmitting it? I've never heard of that
What about my thread makes you think I'm irresponsible enough to start having sex before I'm tested? I never said anything about that jeez. And you really have no idea what it's like being trans in a conservative state. I literally don't have medical insurance because my state chose not to expand Medicaid as a "fuck you" to Obama and people like me who could benefit from medical insurance. So I pay 100% out of pocket to visit doctors and get my hormones.
It's I guess a low chance I have HIV. If I do have it then I'm going to commit suicide. Since I probably don't, I hope this thread might help me to get on with my life.
I dunno... I'm really shy, and when I try things like that it's just gay guys wanting a one night stand. I'm not too sure where to start or what to do. Thought about maybe online dating? But I'm scared my coworkers will see my dating profile and make fun of me or something.
Still...if you suspect you have it, then don't have sex and wait to get tested.
If you're still having sex despite the suspicion, it's a very irresponsible thing to do. Imagine how many people you could hurt all because of your irresponsibility.
Boy get over yourself you chose to be a fag an act like a slut but you can't be yourself an accept that people are gonna make fun of you anyone, nobody is gonna love you the way you want that's a fact in life an we deal with it.
Like holy shit your gay, social reject apparently, a manwhore, an whine about relationships but unwilling to actually try. Please just kill yourself.
The thread is about not doing one night stands anymore and finding a real relationship. And it came about from this HIV scare. I don't like feeling this way, that I might be infected with an incurable horrible autoimmune virus that I could spread to other people. All I want is to feel close to someone.
Don't blame your shyness. Hell you've already had sex. Most I've gone was 3rd base lol
I've been to a gay bar before so I can understand how promiscous things can get...obviously, wait for the test...but ignoring the HIV issue...if say things were normal, maybe you could just hold off on the sex? Maybe, lead someone on but remain interested? That's a pretty common case.
I find online dating to be extremely superficial. If you're confident about how you look, I see why not. Besides, most people who see online dating are on online dating and keep that information to themselves. I'd jokingly swipe right to a friend on Tindr just to see what would happen lol but I never take online dating seriously.
I'm not OP. I just meant in terms of court. Since I was responding to a post that said it's a felony even if you transmit it, even if you don't know you have it.
Specifically that it's a felony. I'm not trying to say that someone "maybe" transmitting it is okay or good.
And you know, it wasn't a billion dicks. Really just a handful of guys or something. I didn't want to have a series of one night stands but it's so much easier to find that than a real boyfriend. And it's been really lonely.
>And you really have no idea what it's like being trans in a conservative state
it has nothing to do with liberal vs conservative
I live in NYC and everyone hates trannies here too lol.
If youre gonna kill yourself, can you do us a huge favor and find an ISIS affiliated mosque and shoot it up/bomb it?
I hope you dont have the hivs, but if youre gonna go out, pretty please?
It's cool. I've got a trans-friend too and she's usually pretty scientific and analytical...well...idk what he/she is but I try to be understanding when I can.
Also, if you do get tested positive, please don't think that killing yourself is an option. If you can support yourself relatively well, the AIDS/HIV medication have come a long way and can effectively let you live a normal life. I don't want to think it's farfetched to find a cure but all that change in the span of 10 years? I can only wonder what the next 10 years can bring.
But remember to solve these things one problem at a time.
I'm saying this in the nicest way possible... don't come to 4chan, or any place on the Internet for that matter with thin skin. People are assholes and with the anonymity that comes with sitting behind a screen, they're free to spout whatever hateful speech they want with no remorse. These people wouldn't say these things to your face in real life. You need to learn to embrace the hate from these random idiots and turn it into humor, turn it into a joke, laugh about it. These people don't even know you, they're just taking stabs at you based on one part of you.
I guess bottom line, grow thicker skin. I know it's hard, but if you're overly sensitive to every thing everyone says to you, you're gonna have a horrible time in life. Laugh it off, however hard it may be, and move on with your day. Cheers.
No I'm definitely killing myself if I have it. You have no idea how it feels possibly having it :(
But I probably don't so whatever. I'm glad your friend has someone like you to talk to.
I think it's okay to be emotional in some situations. Like it's appropriate. And thinking there's a chance you might have HIV is one of those situations.
Are you really? I'm so sorry. When I say that I'm going to kill myself if I have it I'm not implying that everyone should. My life has been going very poorly for a long time now is all, and with this one more thing it would just be too much. Lots of people live with HIV/AIDS without it being too limiting or whatever. And I hope you're one of them.
Lots of people have hard lives. That you would give up from having less hardship is no offense to any of them, it only offends your fortitude and no other. I have HIV, I work a labour job, my mother is dead. I consider none of these situations worth being unhappy over. You have a lot to learn about life. You will learn nothing in the ground.
LOL I would call that worthless garbage slut in person an have done to people like him before and offer to put it out of its misery. People who refuse help for their mental problems should be put down