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Avoid asking these common questions:
>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.
>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.
>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.
>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.
>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing
>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>
>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking
>Brandon or Female Brandon
>Who is Brandon/Female Brandon?
A shitposter who's convinced he's ugly. He keeps posting his picture to ask if he's ugly and to ask for dating advice, only to rebut or ignore any responses he gets. Female Brandon is a girl who pulls the same shit.
Also piss off.
Old Thread: >>16682328
*shrug* My second date with my gf was to an arboretum.
I know for a fact that if I specifically took my girlfriend to a major museum or gallery she'd be over the fucking moon (every time we pass by one I poke her and ask if she wants to pop by, because she always does, and always asks if she notices first).
>I know for a fact that if I specifically took my girlfriend to a major museum or gallery she'd be over the fucking moon
I wonder how a Museum of Natural History would go down. I've always been partial to those.
Do you often try to share the passions/hobbies of your partners ? Or you prefer let them doing their thing on their side ?
I'd looooove to have a gf who'd be willing to try and like riding motorcycle with me so we could ride the world together...
Please, tell me you would at least try it !
Some of my favorite places to go with my boyfriend include museums, botanical gardens, and musicals. I think they make great dates as long as both people are into that sort of thing.
Yes I absolutely do. Though one of the main things that attracted me to my boyfriend in the first place was our shared hobbies and interests. So I'm sure you could find a girl willing, especially if she's already into motorcycles and related things.
While actually AT them? No? But we have lots of sex in general... She's never turned me down for sex, and are always kind of trying to one up each other in giving each other pleasure.
My ex didnt knew much about motorcycle before dating me, now she's completely crazy over, she's really passionnate about it, too bad she cheated on me :/
All the girls i know who ride motorcycle are quite masculine, she was the only one i know that loooved to ride but take it like a hobbie and not some way of life like some others do, it was great, i miss thoses times.
I really hope i'll find someone into it, or at least willing to try and appreciate it !
This is a cute relationship, but might not work out with each partner having very different priorities and understandings of the world. I would have loved to have dated a 30 year old when I was 20 years old, though.
This Monday, I'm getting lunch with a girl that I met on tinder a few months ago. Before this we went on two dates in November. On the second date things were getting pretty heated, clothes came off and all that. Problem is, I'm a virgin, and also very self-conscious about my body and felt that this girl was too good for me. I ended up psyching myself out, and couldn't really get an erection, in fact I remember that I was shaking pretty hard during all of this. We ended up stopping because she said we were "taking things too fast". We watched some Netflix and cuddled, and before I left she kissed me and said she'd see me later. I texted her the next day asking if we could talk about what happened last night, and she was pretty distant and said that she had just gotten out of a relationship and she wasn't sure if she was ready for something serious again. I was devastated because I felt that she was just letting me down easy, and that basically I had fucked up by getting too anxious. After that we pretty much cut contact. I've been dwelling on this ever since it happened because not only was it extremely embarrassing for me, I also really liked this girl and was upset that I basically destroyed any chance of a relationship with her. Or so I thought.
I messaged her out of the blue like 45 minutes ago just to see how her winter break was going. I honestly didn't expect a response, so I was surprised when she replied moments later. We ended up talking about how our breaks were going. She ended up saying that we should hang out sometime and I asked her if she wanted to get lunch and catch up, and she agreed.
Girls, guys, or anyone with an iota of relationship experience, how do I not fuck this up? I am honestly completely baffled at how different she was acting towards me today compared to when we last spoke in November.
So I went on a date and it went really well, messaged her later that night telling her I really enjoyed hanging out, she agreed.
Saw her at work the other day (shes a customer), couldn't talk for long as I was busy, she texted after that she understood I was busy and it was okay.
Two days after that I messaged her asking how she was and that if she could let me know when shes free to catch up again and now its been three days.
I get it people are busy and she might even be waiting to message at a later time when shes 100% sure shes not busy, but im still left wondering if she'll reply.
I did ask how she was, she could at least reply to that I think and she also seemed so interested, even my chick friends at work said her texts were obvious signs of how much she was into me (smiley faces galore).
Tl:dr is 3 days with no reply a bad sign after asking for a second date, which she even mentioned doing on the first date?
Why dont girls like dating single fathers? Im not looking for a baby sitter or a new mom for my kid... most girls i ask out say no because i have a kid. Either thats a cheap way to cop out with out saying im ugly, or they dont like guys with kids or both.
For the same reasons people arent interested in dating single moms. It comes with a host of obligations, it kills spontaneity in the relationship, and their ex is often a recurring figure. Meanwhile there's usually a good number of people your own age that don't have kids involved.
It's not really a complex thing.
Well fuck me sideways. I guess youre right. Ah well i guess ill just die a single guy. Hopefully when my kid grows up she doesnt experience the same loneliness i experience every night. Fuck it. Il just be that weird guy who cums on anime dolls and puts it on 4chan
yeah some girls don't. It can be boiled down to them wanting to be among your first priorities, and if you have a kid the kid will obviously come first. Maybe they don't want to deal with the kid's mom (in the future). you just have to find girls who like kids and see your status as a dad as a testament to your reliability and commitment. I'd be totally down to seriously date a single father providing we related and got along
>Il just be that weird guy who cums on anime dolls and puts it on 4chan
Maybe you shouldnt be in a relationship if this is your go to response when you realize you have some points against you, instead of trying to up your market value instead.
Then go for single moms. For all of the issues I listed they have them too, and would be on the same page.
>girl insists she want's to know me better
>rarely inquires anything about me
>relies on me to carry the convo, one word replies me if I stop asking her things
what the fuck
right now she's not replying to me; think I pried a bit too deep
or she doesnt have the manners to make an excuse if she doesnt feel like talking
I realize she's texting other people, and it would be a huge pain to tell all of them, but you think she would feel obligated to tell me in a timely manner when I did when she double texted me when I was working.
Apparently a friend told me my old crush from like 2 years ago still likes me, and I should talk to her... I don't have her number anymore so Imma try to get in touch on FB... what do I say when messaging her after all this time? Like... I don't wanna just say "Hi" or some shit, but i don't want to come off as the weirdo I am, either
How can I upgrade to a white girl? So I've been fucking this hot black chick for like 2 months now, but I'm getting kind of tired of her. We just aren't that similar with regards to life goals and the like.
I want to find a nerdy white girl that I can get along with and possibly do something more than just fuck. I'm studying writing at a big college, but I suck at making new connections. The only way I met this girl was through tinder. Is there any hope for me? I'm tired of sneaking around with this butterface
My bf has a female friend that got cheated on and dumped two weeks ago. (by somebody she has an off-on relationship, so she already seems rather insane to me...) Yesterday evening my bf had plans to meet her. He hasn't responded to my texts yet and it's 8am now. I have to admit that some rather unwanted thoughts are starting to creep in. Is it normal to be worried? I don't want to be paranoid. I trust my bf, but i don't trust a girl that's clearly in a situation where she lacks validation and attention...
Oh and i don't personally know that girl, i've only been with my bf for 2 months and the chance to meet her never came up yet.
Probably won't work out and the age gap is a little on the big side, but I wouldn't really care. Personally wouldn't do it though
Some things I like to share, others not. Motorcycles are not something I'd be interested in, but other girls might
The same reasons why guys don't want to date single mothers. How is that not obvious?
The biggest thing is chemistry. You can't synthesize chemistry
So this girl I went on a date with last weekend hasn't replied in 3 days and its the weekend again.
Obviously I want a chance to smash her, but I don't want to seem desperate or clingy.
Is it reasonable to message her asking what shes up to tonight, even when the last message involved letting me know when shes free to see me again?
Or should I just go out clubbing like I planned and find a sloot?
Well first date I didn't even make a move or flirt too much.
If anything I was thinking maybe she was put off by my lack of 'smash vibes' if you know what I mean (she Chinese so I thought she might be really conservative).
And yes to the last part, relationships are so boring in comparison to being a perpetual club slut, but I thought maybe I could finally change.
Good point and I think you're right, we're only a year apart but im second year uni and shes full time work with a master degree.
Ill just wait it out, she could even be seeing other guys and trying to come to a conclusion which one to invest most in.
there's a girl that i've been really good friends with for a few years. however, i'm also madly in love with her. how can i ask her out without damaging my existing relationship with her?
Girls, how standard is it for you to do this in this situation?
>Gf and I agree to mutually break up cause she's going off to college.
>she still loves me she says
>not even 24 hours sleeps with her ex that was her first that she still loves
Only thing I can think of is she didn't love me enough to even have bad feelings.. Idk
Then try to subtly create some and observe her reactions closely. If she's open to it, slowly go further. Otherwise abort mission and she will forget about it pretty fast.
If you are a slut this might be "standart". However. She clearly was just trying to let you down gently. She didn't love you and definitely doesn't "still love you". Going to college is NO reason to break uo if you care about somebody.
Don't get bitter. Try to find a better girl next time
Is it normal to be worried?
I guess? I probably wouldn't be but that's just me and I tend to have faith in people 'til they prove otherwise.
Is it weird to not respond to texts early in the morning from you girlfriend when you've been out with friends (probably getting drunk, which probably makes you still hungover)?
That depends on your boyfriend and the texts you sent him.
I almost always respond to texts from my girlfriend when I see them, unless I'm busy or distracted. However when I'm with friends and drinking, I also have a habit of just putting my phone in random places (because It's uncomfortable in my pocket), so hours might pass by before checking, and if it's late enough or just a completely banal comment, i'm probably not going to respond because I just think it's not worth potentially waking her up.
There's no real reason for you to work yourself up in a tizzy. Being worried over something that you don't think will happen anyway is completely pointless and will just make you miserable.
Just wait for him to respond back and see what's up.
>Why does she say this to me?
>Just pretend you're my spouse and you can get he same rate... or pretend youre my child and get 50% off of tuition.
Maybe so you can get the same rate?
Too obvious for you?
Thanks for your response anon...
Just to clarify, i'm waiting for a response since yesterday evening when he went to her. I'm aware that it would be stupid to be worried if he doesn't respond so early in the morning after a night out. And i also wouldn't be worried if he had gone out with the boys or something. But i know that he's been alone with that girl. And that's what makes the whole situation rather uncomfy...
I'm usually all for "trust untill proven otgerwise", but i find it rather difficult cause i can't quiet grasp that girls moral standarts since i don't know her. I DO trust my bf, but he's rather naive and might not get the warning signals. I don't think he would do something as stupid as sleep with her, but i don't want her to abuse him as her beta-orbiter to make her feel better about herselfe. And i do have a feeling that that's exaclty what this friendship is about.
She could have been using her ex to feel better about you.
Or she still liked her ex but loved you too much to do anything when you were together.
I think you're probably just trying to put yourself down by saying "she never loved me". Or to feel validated about the split since you'd "never work out anyway". Or to convine yourself it was good riddance because shes a "dirty slut" anyway.
I think you forgot the part where fucking your ex to feel better about your newer ex and being with somebody despite still having feeling for another person infact DO make you a huge slut?
That really depends on what you define a slut to be. I'm not saying you're wrong for considering it to be the behaviour of a slut, but there are people who would disagree.
The biggest question is: why does any of this matter to the OP? How does he know anyway?
So if you trust your boyfriend and don't think he would betray you, what exactly is it that you're worried about?
Even if she abuses him as a "beta orbiter" for a moral boost, what lasting effect will could that possibly have on your relationship? Or even on him at all?
She's not going to eat his organs or steal his kidneys. I'm pretty sure she's not going to convince him to let her beat him up.
If you trust him enough not to cheat, I honestly don't see what else there possibly could be for you to be distressed about.
I'm pretty sure there are some guys here with that exact fetish. <.<
What exactly was NEET again?
No Education Employment and Training?
I general... I think most everyone is turned off by that. General drive is one of the most attractive traits in people, and that shows a decided lack of it.
*shrug* just ask him what's up later. You don't have to go full crazydump on him, just a simple, "Hey, how'd it go yesterday".
By the way, it's been two months. You were probably due.
I think in 10 months of dating, my girlfriend and I have missed a goodnight text exactly 3 times. It happens. You're just going to get nights where you're just wrapped up in other shit (like trying to make a friend feel better) and you just forget/don't notice until way too late.
good, that's what i was planning to do anyways! thanks for confirming.
yeah, i don't mind a missed text. but why'd id have to be whilst he's alone with a desperate girl that i don't have any reason to trust. fuck... i don't want this crazy bullcrap.
you sure about that? but there are girls. my suggestion would be that you just threat them like human beings. no different than the guys. and if you find one you are fond of, start to get to know her better, then proceed to bring some sexual tension into the picture.
you don't have to APPROACH anybody. just make sure to be inviting and genuinely interested in the person you are talking to. by the way, do you want to talk to girls genuinely interested in anime or "cosplayers"?
I have an ex boyfriend who I've been good friends with for a long time. Before we started dating, he told me how worried he was that it would ruin the friendship and losing me as a friend permanently is the worst possible scenario that could come of it. We only dated for a few months, it never got serious because I realized I didn't really feel strongly for him. We broke up on good terms and are back to being good friends. I told him that if he needed space to get over it, I would absolutely give it to him and we could reconnect at a later time when he was ready. He continues to want to hang out a lot though, and he really doesn't seem over it (eg: got drunk and told a bunch of people that he was madly in love with me, tells me how much women suck except for me, etc).
We act completely platonic together now that we broke up, I don't flirt or let him pay for things or lead him on in any way. But is it my responsibility to distance myself from him? I can tell he's trying to move on and not doing a great job of it, seeing me probably doesn't help. I assume he's got some hope that we'll get back together but at the same time I do think he genuinely likes being friends at the very least. I'd feel really fucking awful for cutting him off, I don't know what's worse.
A couple of weeks ago some friends and I were talking about how during exams you just masturbate a lot more, and we'd say things like "oh yeah, sometimes you just get bored and you're like: well better go masturbate then", and then one of the girls said: "well sometimes when you've come but kept going you're like, "might as well keep going then".
is this actually something girls have while masturbating?
Femanons, think of this situation:
You have lost a flash drive at university containing different files for university ans some pictures only meant for your boyfriend.
A guy finds the stick and contacts you (as you have a class together but hadn't contact yet).
How would you want the guy to react?
Should he react at all, other that handing you your drive?
Even though us men don't seem like that sometimes:
Ask him, talk to him about what you see.
If you want it to be more comfortable, you could say "you don't have to answer anything, let it sink in." or you could write him an sms (no hwatsapp or that kind of bullshit, he doesn't want you to know if he read it or not)
Okay women, here ill looking for you to reveal the keys to your games
Say you are somewhere with a friend or two. Or for now, lets start with easy mode and youre alone.
You and I make I contact and youre attracted to me and Im attracted to you.
What are the vague signs I should look for as a signal to approach you.
Say you winked at me or smiled back and I crossed the ocean to come talk to you.
Now what the hell are you looking for me to do. It seems like that wink is just your way of letting me know that I should come entertain you. Which is bs but thats not the point. How exactly do you like to be entertained.
Do you want me to get straight to the point, exchange names and ask you out.
Do you want me to compliment you first. Make decent small talk about whats going on.
What do you want. I know every woman is different (but not really) but having a few womens opinion is better than having no idea what Im doing.
>Girl is responsive and asks me what I was gonna say
>I ask what her plans for the weekend are
I can get if she's not interested and we stop talking but then they message again without bringing it up.
What's up with that?
i guess my bf spends too much time on the internet. he obviously has fallen for that "make her cum first" fad. when i cum my desire for sex is GONE. I don't even get wet anymore. that's as if you'd try to fuck your girl after you already came. what do?
Uh guys cant keep going after they cum. Refractory period. Wed love to if our penises even stay semi hard but sex is impossible so thats not a comparable analogy.
Also he wants to make you cum first because its more likely that a man will get off before a woman will and when he does sex is over. So if you had to choose between no orgasm or orgasm then sex which would it be.
Then tell him that. If you are okay with no orgasm and want sex more then he wont mind swapping. He only wants to make sure you are pleased.
That being said dont be a bitch and start complaining when you dont get off and demand more from him. You made your choice here.
well, making me cum is fucking hard work and sometimes i just want the closeness and intimacy and am not in the mood for an orgasm. i think it's sweet that he's so concerned about my satisfaction, but i'm absolutely ok with only occasionally having an orgasm. i guess it's also because he likes the feeling of accomplishement if he can make me cum. eh, i guess i'll have to just tell him. low key.
My girlfriend won't let me fondle her breasts directly because she's embarrassed that she have no nipples.
Does she me she have inverted nipples?
If so how to go around that, and assure her it's nothing odd.
my bf's pretty anxious and awkward. he's good at hiding it! but i can see straight trough him cause i'm just the same.
how can i help him to let his guard down around me? i don't mind and i don't care. i just want him, with all his flaws and oddities. help /adv/.
This may sound odd but try to do some of the stuff in those ASMR videos.
Simply put, just do stuff with intimacy.
Cuddle with him, play with his hair, etc.
Ask if he wants to talk about his day.
not all the time. but you can tell that he thinks about his actions and how others perceive them all the time. he's an awesome guy! but i want him to see that he doesn't have to try so hard all the time...
>Cuddle with him, play with his hair, etc
we do that all the time. but he seems to always be on guard about every word that leaves hismouth, about every touch and move. i don't mind, but i know it's exhausting and i want him to feel at home with me.
i apprecciate it! But would you like to have sex comletely not horny? it's just going trough the motions and that's absolutely not what i want. it's no fun to sleep with somebody that's not horny anymore.
Sometimes I just want a quick blowjob, sometimes I want intimate sex.
Express what you want from you partner. Imagine if you wanted intimacy and he just wanted a quickie. If you dont think communication is important you laid your own bed.
My girlfriend is being bitchy with me because I didn't compliment her on her snap story. When she first complained I said 'I saw it and you do look very pretty', to which she replied 'doesn't count when i have to ask but thanks'. Is that rude of her? Should I play into it or ignore her? I feel she's being unreasonable.
She's also out at a nightclub atm if that makes a difference.
then tell her that you love her just the way she is. that every inch of her body is perfect to you. that you want to be able to love her whole body. that you don't care if her breasts are not looking like everybody elses cause you love them most for being HER breasts.
also, a little later tell her that playing with them will probably make them "come" out" over time.
Not usually but I think she craves attention. The only reason we ever fight is because of double standards and petty things like this. She can't handle any criticism at all without freaking out. I'm just worried that because she's out at a nightclub she may be using this as an excuse to hook up with someone. Or is that irrational?
well, i think it's sad that this topic had to end in a fight. i do hope you didn't word it like that because it sounds very exposed if you say it like that. maybe suggest that you can touch them in the dark for a start? she's just afraid you'll be repulsed. if she starts to feel secure because she feels like you still think her breasts are fantastic after you have touched them and are aware of the "gravity of her problem".
if you don't trust her like that then this is pretty much doomed. not saying you shold be trusting somebody that's not worthy of your trust. you should seriously overthink this anon. it doesn't sound pleasant and healthy
ah. hm, then it starts to get complicated.
she needs the validation and you don't provide it in the amounts she expects you to. she want's you to be all over her and to do so when erybody can see it. please and thank you. she practically uses you and that's harsh.
It's probably not as bad as you think it is, but even if it is, it's not a huge turnoff unless one nipple is dime sized and the other is like a slice of bologna.
That's why we don't think about something off putting, we think of something unrelated to sex, the commonly used example being baseball.
well, it seems like all she cares about is me me me.
and yes, her being out with her female best friend might be a reason for her behaviour. she probably want's you to be (her idea of) an ideal bf to show off how she's so awesome she even got the part with the knight in shining armour down. i might be projecting but it seems so obvious to me. she uses you to feel better about herselfe infront of others. not very nice and sincere desu.
She is sending me question marks and unhappy faces. I just replied 'I frequently tell you you're beautiful and send you thoughtful messages. Telling me it didn't count and being annoyed at me just because I didn't compliment you one time..'
She turn this around on me and say its my fault for ruining her night. We fought just the other day because an ex bf kept asking her to hangout (she would ignore him when he asked, afaik), I asked her to delete him off fb since he kept harassing her which created a fight, her saying I am 'controlling'. Yet when a girl from uni messages me about a group project she freaks out and gets annoyed at me
I'm 20. I've had quite a few other girls but we're all FWB so there was no emotions really. This is my first relationship though so I've kinda gone a bit WK with her.
I want to break up with her but I'm pretty emotionally attached to her. I struggle to open up emotionally to people so I guess since I have for her I feel more vulnerable
Just over 7 months. I don't know, she can be really caring, she's attractive, she's sweet and thoughtful. I have no idea if I can save this. I'm now starting to be less 'tolerant' of her hypocrisy and immaturity, which I assume will cause more fights. I don't think its healthy to be in a one sided relationship. That actually reminds me earlier in the relationship we got in a fight over her saying the relationship should be '60% her in control and 40% me'.
You would sacrifice personal pleasure for the pleasure of your partner either because them being satisfied makes you satisfied, or you enjoy the sense of accomplishment of having pleasured your partner. Would you always want the guy to cum five minutes into fucking you?
evreybody can be caring if they want to. does she want to be caring towards you?
that's good. i have a feeling that it won't take too long untill your feelings start to cool off and you can get out of this without getting hurt too much.
and wat? 60%? why would a relationship even be about somebody being in controle? that's rather stupid.
what does she want to have controle over?
it sound like she just likes to boss you around. that's no way to treat somebody you supposedly "love". i mean, by all means, you two are rather yound so it's normal to have some realtionships to get "the hang of it". but don't let her walk all over you. i guess that's your lesson you need to learn out of this. you don't need to "be an asshole" or "put her in her place". just simply walk out of this if she doesn't give you the respect you deserve.
She responded to my message 'I wasn't annoyed!', what should I reply to that?
I have no idea, but I stuck to what I said and told her its 50/50. She doesn't walk all over me but she definitely tries, she acts like a princess. But yeah seeings as its my first relationship its a big learning curve.
thanks! you cleared away lot's of questions.
well, actually i wouldn't mind. i can't cum from penetration anyways and my bf cumming is the most satisfying part of sleeping with him. but i might be a very weird one, so there's that.
I'm thinking of replying 'You clearly were, you only respond 'ah okay' when you are annoyed, and then to tell me 'it doesn't count but thanks' comes across as passive aggressive. Even if you weren't annoyed, I feel very unappreciated for you to call me out for not complimenting you one time'
don't feed into her drama. she will find a way to turn it around and blame you. in the end she will be the one expecting an appology from you. tell her that you have no spare energy for drama like that and you're now heading out to the gym (or whatever) and that you'll talk to her again when things have cooled off a bit.
>spare the whips for later on.
50 shades fucked BDSM image beyond any hope.
BDSM isn't about whips, YKIMK.
I'm just being honest, with no hidden agenda.
If a woman ask me what you like in sex, I'll answer I'm into BDSM.
Its 2am (Aus), I ended up just turning off my phone. I'll deal with it in the morning. She took 30 minutes to respond to my first response to her (after she opened it), probably realized she seemed petty and thought of a way to recover.
So there's this cute girl I sometimes see in the subway... We always smile at each other, never talked though.
I sort of would like to get to know her. Should I talk to her and if so, what do I say?
I'm probably overthinking this too much, but well...
it was a metaphore. get over yourselfe mr. i hate pop-culture.
yeah, so should i hand you a step by step guide on how to give me multiple orgasms oraly at our first dinner-date? have some dignity anon.
ok. that might be te best option. godspeed anon! don't let her drive you insane. i'm sure she has her good traits and if nothing else you atleast have a lot of opportunities to hone your relationship skills.
yes! if she keeps smiling at you, DEFINITELY make a move. maybe something funny/cute/awkward like giving her a little wave next time you lock eyes. if she seems amused, be brave and ask her to grab a coffee.
Well when she got drunk at a party two weeks later, were at she told me. Based on a time line of events I pinpointed it that soon, because we talked and hung out regularly after still like we weren't even broken up, except for the day it happened.
I just said 'Goodnight' and left it at that (felt like I had to say something). Depending on how she is tomorrow (assuming she didn't cheat on me out of spite at the club) will determine if relationship continues. I'm pretty easy going and I have pretty much no drama in my life except with her, which is usually drama she starts and feeds off.
Thankyou for your help anon! You've really helped me through this and opened my eyes. I never really saw it as being used until you pointed it out.
perfect. that way you don't give her more reasons for drama. don't let her drag you down to that level.
i really hope she has cooled off untill tomorrow and you two get a happy ending!
Well, I'm 26 y.o virgin never had a gf before nor I ever wanted to have one.
Now there is this girl that works with me, she's cute in her own way.
She cook cakes, pizza for me, insist on eating together some times, pour me tea often.
Ask about my day, what I like and dislike, she comes to me when she's troubled about something, laugh at my social awkwardness.
You know stuff like those.
if a girl seems to enjoy and seek eyecontact. if she smiles and starts to blush for example. or if she needs to whisper to her friends "about that cute guy over there, that totally just winked at her".
do something that she won't forget. you don't need to "ace" it 100%. in my case, you being a bit awkard would greatly add do your charme.
maybe even admit that you have no idea how to handle this but that you didn't just wanted her to slip away and if she would like to exchange numebrs so you can make awkward conversations till one of you musters up the courage to suggest going to the movies.
>is she a social butterfly and nice like that to everybody
That's why it's hard to interpret her behavior.
I'm the only guy around in work, so I can't tell if she's just being friendly or being interested in me.
>same "awkwardness-level" as you?
I doubt any one is as socially awkward as me, It seems we were together in the same college and took the same classes, but I wasn't paying much intention to anyone back then.
well, you can always try the "sexual tension" method. try to subtly cross the "being friendly" line and see how she reacts. make eyecontact a tiny bit too long or sit a bit too close. if she seems pleased then you got green light. slowly increase the intimacy untill she'll give you a subtle int that you have gone too far. if you follow this rules you will always be able to back up again and not loose your dignity if she's not interested after all.
>try to subtly cross the "being friendly" line
Sorry, I should have been more clear.
I don't want to get into relationship.
She's a nice girl and she deserve someone better than me, And telling her to lay off is rude since she's doing nothing wrong.
I tried to distant myself from her but she got worried over me.
>make eyecontact a tiny bit too long or sit a bit too close
Part of my social awkwardness, is that I tend to look to people in the eyes, too long in fact. I was once asked by a relative of mine if I'm gay, because I didn't glance at her friend's cleavage.
As for sitting she usally choose to sit either across me or beside me when we eat, if that mean anything.
ah. you want to friendzone her? well, just act as if you don't notice her advances and if she ever goes further, just tell her that you "don't see her that way and wouldn't want to risk your firendship". bam.
you don't have to. if she never crosses the "friendly" line, you aren't obliged to tell her about your lack of mutual interest. if she crosses that line and you just let her do her thing and say nothing then it starts to get mean. iow, if you would start making her do favors you know she only does because she's actually in love with you. that's where you should draw the line and have a talk with her.
reposting from the "never forgetti thread" cause i figured ther's more people in here.
question to you guys:
would it be weird if i'd let my bf fuck escorts if he ever felt the way op does? i mean, i can understand that it's a daunting thought to only be able to fuck one person for the rest of your life. and besides, there would be periods where sex just isn't on the table. after giving birth for example. i guess i could live with my man fucking other women to get it out of his system if i knew there was no chance of him getting emotionally attached to these girls.
I see, so she is most likely interested in me in a romantic way.
But she's waiting for me to make this first move.
Which is something that I have no intent to do.
I feel sad for her, Should I pretend I got a girlfriend or something?
it's hard to tell actually. but it might be.
no, you don't have to build a house of cards to make her feel better. it's not your fault if she has catched the feels. she would need to deal with unreciprocated infatuation on her own. it's not your job to ween her off
What is a good method of asking a girl out?
Like specifically, when and how should you do it, and what's a good place to ask a girl out to for a first date?
I'm a 19 kissless male here so I really have to start getting on the ball
Didn't want to make a new thread just for this.
Finally had a message back from someone that isn't a robot on POF. Read through her profile and seems a pretty interesting and cute grille.
What's the etiquette here, do we need to exchange a few messages before I try to swap phone numbers? I've had dates before, so if that comes I'll be alright, but the whole online aspect is new to me and frankly scares me a little. There isn't much info on my profile, but I don't just want to talk about me, right? What do?
I think I fucked it up big time.
So I asked a girl of my class to date. We were very intimate on the first weeks of class, but both lost interest on each other. At least me on her, and then she found a BF.
I just wanted to ask her out that very same moment and did it, this same monday.
She laughed a lot and felt very good, but told me that no, she just broke up with his BF and felt like didn´t want to know anything about boys or dating, and that she was with low self steem.
I tried to do the same thing on Friday, but confessing my feelings for her and telling her that I want to help her with her problems, that I appreciated her a lot and that I loved how she was, how she laughed and that I want to make her feel good for a millenium, which is true. I probably fell in love for her.
I didn´t stood more and today I told her on phone my feelings. She looked really upset or nervous and told me that no is no, just what I expected.
Did I lost every opportunity I will ever have with her?
Now I have to face her almost every day on class. And I don´t know how to make the situation comfortable, or how don´t give a fuck.
I expect advices from both genres. Thanks.
Which is better size for a penis
7x6 or 8x5.5
Its weird but when Im not actively masturbating a lot my penis loses an inch but gains in girth.
Im pretty sure its because of the ligament being stretched a lot so more is allowed to stick out.
Say im into 1 night stands. Which one should I have ready.
Today My ex GF forced a conversation where she could drop in the fact that she fucked a random guy on new years a month after we broke up, why did she need to tell me this, iv been nothing but polite and respectful to her since the break up.
Has anyone travelled with a sex toy? Im traveling to the US from Canada soon and Im taking a wevibe (still in the package unopened) with me and some rope cause Im seeing my long distance gf. Advice? Should I ship it there instead of just take it with me?
If you're flying, put it in checked baggage. Leave it right on top of everything else in the bag. If it flags the bag for inspection in an x-ray they won't have to rifle through all your shit to find it.
I once flew with 30lbs of partially assembled electronic components. They just dumped it all out in my bag. You should be fine.
There's something that's been bothering her for a while and she wants to talk about it. Not much you can do, really
I don't understand how she can force you to have a conversation. You have yourself to blame for this, at least partially
I don't know, I don't measure and rate penises
Given that you flaked on her? Yeah, you messed up. She's not interested, move on
There are so many variables involved that we could never give you advice on such a vague and abstract question
I'd carry out the rest of the date normally, then throw him the "let's be friends" line. That's not something you bring up on the first date
How can I upgrade to a white girl? So I've been fucking this hot black chick for like 2 months now, but I'm getting kind of tired of her. We just aren't that similar with regards to life goals and the like.
I want to find a nerdy white girl that I can get along with and possibly do something more than just fuck. I'm studying writing at a big college, but I suck at making new connections. The only way I met this girl was through tinder. Is there any hope for me? I'm tired of sneaking around with this butterface.
(Female) Eh, probably not. It would really depend on when the truth came out. If I went into the situation knowing it, then no, I wouldn't date them. I have no issue with homosexuality, but it's not something I want to think about in my relationships. It just makes me uncomfortable.
Now, if we had been dating for a couple of years and we're madly in love and the truth comes out? I wouldn't just drop someone like a rock. But we'd need to talk it out a great deal until I can learn to be comfortable about it. Even then, I dunno what would happen at that point.
I don't know if this counts, but my boyfriend's experimented with guys in the past. I don't care about that, but he's also come to the conclusion after those experiences that he's 100% straight. I really don't know if I'd date someone who was actually bisexual, because there are too many things to think about
Should you wait until the last day of class to ask out a girl you are interested in? Considering you are forced to be in a room with them I can't help but feel it would turn the rest of the semester into an awkward hell.
Are you American? Because the semester just started a week ago, bro. A lot can happen between now and May.
It's only awkward if you make it awkward. If she turns you down, smile about it and shrug it off. You need to learn to be comfortable with rejection. You'll experience it a lot in every aspect of life.
Women of /adv/, I need help picking a fun date. Here's some ideas:
>go to a sit down deli and try every single meat and antipasto they have
>go to an animal shelter and pick out a dog (my dog died and it'd be a fun way to get a new dog)
>one of those escape room things
I'm clueless so these are my best ideas. I'm 25, she's 24, I'm Italian and she's Russian.
>Would you date someone (the opposite sex of you) if they were bisexual?
Sure, but as a general rule, I get tired if I have to deal with someone who puts their sexuality/sex life at the top of their identity. If it's just a facet of her life, part of what makes her who she is, then I'm fine. I get repelled by anyone who puts a big spotlight on themselves for no reason.
I'm fat, but I'm working on it.
I'm 6'0". I'm confident, have gainful employment, am educated, have my own place and car. It seems the biggest dealbreaker for me is my weight, but it's getting there. I'm hoping to be 190lbs by July. I go to the gym daily and bicycle 20km daily.
Should I even bother trying to date now or wait until I'm at my goal weight?
I'm doing the same thing as you.. ButI'm trying to wait to date until I'm happy with myself. I think I might lose focus otherwise and it'll put a hold on all that I'm doing, and I'll eventually be unhappy with myself (again). Great job over there, though!
First off, good job to the both of you! I did the same thing last year -went from 265lbs to 215lbs-. I think it shouldn't really matter if you make it to your goal weight if you're looking for someone. Either wait until you're comfortable with yourself and then date someone or find someone who likes you as you are -which it sounds like you can- and will further push you to keep working on getting your weight to a healthy number.
I'm kind of reluctant to say anything, because it's purely an aethetic thing that may or may not matter to you, becuase your health is BY FAR the most important thing, and because it sounds like you're down a good path and that's AMAZING dedication, but just be cognizant of the fact that at that speed of weight loss, you're probably going to have a bit of loose skin. The recommended rate to minimize that is 1-2 pounds a week.
Anyway, I find that when you're working out, you general have a better, healthier look than when you don't, no matter your weight. And that effort tends to count for a quite a bit.
Will you be as successful as if you started when you dropped another 30-40 pounds, probably not, but at the same time, that's still probably going to be more successful than if you weren't dating at all.
Honestly, just do what you feel most confident and comfortable doing. If your health and that accomplishing that goal is your priority and you think dating might have a chance of being a distraction or interfering with you doing that , go ahead and wait. If you dating and meeting someone is your priority, go ahead and go date.
Do what you think is best for you.
is this cheating?
I have a GF that I really love, but she's away for some months. Yesterday me and my homeboy partied and I lost him so I walked back to my dorm with some chicks that live nearby. We talked and such, and I know one of them really likes me but I'm not the type to be unfaithful so I don't even answer to her flirting.
Me and those girls and another guy stood around and nightcapped before going to bed. I was BLASTED drunk so I went to bed and passed out immediately. Now, this chick that I presume likes me all of the sudden walks in in the middle of the night. I have no idea what time it was, but she lays down next to me. Worst is.... I let her. Because I miss this with my GF that is abroad. So I cuddled up with her and fell asleep. I'm sure she wanted to fuck but all I did was cuddle up with her and sleep.
What do you reckon I should do? Telling my GF will probably make it the end for us.
What's the best way for a guy to open up about certain feelings he has for a girl without risking the friendship? I am extremely extroverted but also very intuitive and I keep my guard up to maintain friendships. I enjoy the friendship I have with this girl and we back and forth a little bit, but she's a gogo dancer and I'm a raver who socializes with everybody in the room, but I'm not sure if she just has a friendly demeanor towards me. I am a very likable person with an extremely positive attitude but I am... Eh kinda into this girl? I want to let her know that I'm feeling some type of way about her but not come off in a way that would damage the already healthy new friendship I have with her. (A month)
Just to clarify we don't hang out all the time, we've seen each other maybe 2 or 3 times irl and text occasionally.
I think it should also be mentioned that she's "talking" to someone and told me straight up without instigation; I've been nothing but a friend and only hit on her very subtly and vice versa (from my perspective anyway, she calls me 'her doll')
What number date is this? What's an escape room?
I'd suggest against the dog one since she'll kinda feel attached and it'll feel like the two of yours dog. Which if you're not in a ltr would cause issue.
I am afraid I might have ruined a budding relationship by overtexting her the last few days.
We parted for the weekend and I told her to get in touch when she was free.
Assuming I won't have heard from her by monday morning (when we will meet in class)
how can I unfuck the mess I drove myself into?
Un-fuck yourself slowly by never talking to her until she says something to you first
Yeah it's gonna be hard af but think of it this way, it she doesn't talk to you back, it wouldn't have worked anyway. Congrats you just saved yourself a heartbreak.
if she actually gives a damn about this dude there's very little chance she'd forget to text him, honestly
OP, I know it sucks, but just wait till she texts back man, don't come across as needy it's wayyyyyy off putting
For the girls:
How often do you think about boys?
I look at how much effort women go through to look beautiful, and the money they invest to it, it feels like guys are on your mind 90% of the time.
As a guy, I have tons of hobbies and distractions that can keep my mind off women, but I feel like use this just use time to get more 'game'.
Is this just for the really pretty girls?
>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
So... I guess writing a cheesy love letter to my ex (who cheated on me three years ago with a friend) is not a good idea?
Why do you want us to treat you badly? I dont want to. I want to be the ultimate chivalrous super boyfriend that treats you with nothing but affection. Being mean and treating someone poorly is not something I want to do
But its becoming more and more apparent to me that you guys literally want it. My sex/dating history is looking more and more like
>Treat girl well
>Doesnt work well
>Be a dick to girl
>Shes on my dick
I made plans with a girl online 2 weeks ago and we've had to reschedule twice already (work, last minute plans, etc). We're supposed to be meeting up tomorrow and I'm a bit nervous about asking if we're still meeting up or not.
Any suggestions on how to write my message?
"Are we still meeting up tomorrow? Here's hoping third time's lucky!"
Why in the world would you do that?
If I were interested, I'd have messaged him
Not much at all. I don't put effort into my appearance for boys, I do it for myself - it makes me feel more confident, and I feel good when I feel confident. That's not to say I lack confidence, but it gives me a little boost.
After an argument with my gf where she was in the wrong, she's asking me to apologize. I told her I'm not going to apologize when I didn't do anything wrong, I tried to change the conversation and she wont let it go, she said 'are you really not going to apologize?'. Do I stick to my guns? This fight was started by her being disrespectful to me and me calling her out for it
Humanity doesn't deserve the right to exist
Dont hit me with that bullshit. Dont pretend it isnt true
Or maybe you really do think it isnt true, that its all some great dellusion all girls believe in because of evolutionary girl genetics or something
That girls will moan that men treat them badly, then seek out guys that treat them badly because they like the rush, then moan they've been treated badly
While perfectly good guys dont get a look in because they werent mean enough
I mean, I get it
Its bullshit, and I understand why women have such a bed rep of being retarded, but at least I get it now
Dont hate the player hate the game I guess
You know it would have been a million times earlier just to apologise and compliment her, right? I'm not saying you're in the wrong, I'm just saying you could have very easily diffused the situation.
Thats the thing. I complimented her twice after she said I didn't compliment her. That still wasn't enough, she replied 'doesn't count when i have to ask but thanks', which is passive aggressive. I can't apologize for something where I didn't do anything wrong.
No I didn't apologize for calling her out about her being passive aggressive. I just messaged her 'I'm sorry your upset but I'm not going to apologize for standing up for myself'
Great come back. I'd say something to insult your intelligence but you'd probably get wet and jump my dick if you did
But hey Im not mad. Its just the way rhe world works. Do whatever you wanna do I guess
Look, I know you don't want to hear this, but you're really not making the situation any better. She's obviously not willing to step down, so it's up to you to be the adult and do it. Pick your fights wisely.
If you both keep up being this stubborn, your relationship is either going to have significant periods of unhappiness, or it won't last long at all. If you thought she was getting upset over something minor, why not just apologise? After all, it IS something really quite insignificant. You've both contributed to this situation, she's not completely to blame.
I don't see why I should apologize when she is creating drama over something petty. I literally didn't do anything wrong, I only contributed by calling her out for being rude. I just wouldn't be happy with myself and I'd resent her if I apologized. Maybe I can think through it but at the moment I just can't bring myself to apologize when I'm confident (and other people who I have shown the conversation to) I literally did nothing wrong
Honestly I wouldnt stress over it. The other guy is saying you should just diffuse the situation, but if shes going to be ass blasted over something so stupid she's going to be ass blasted over other trivialities in the future too. A relationship based around soothing her ego doesnt sound that fun to me.
You did nothing wrong in the argument, I agree. But you didn't do anything to diffuse the situation, which you could have done so easily, and so avoided this entire problem. All you had to do (and all you have to do now to fix this problem) is apologise. Like I said, I know you don't want to hear this, but as an outsider, this is my opinion. The way I see it, you're both being childish, she's just being more childish than you are.
In the end, is this really worth both of you being this upset over?
Sure, as long as they didnt think they could fuck a girl and pretended it wasnt cheating or some nonsense.
I don't really care if she went after women in the past, as long as it stays in the past.
If what you enjoy is "dadcore", embrace it.
I told him to apologise, because he asked what to do, because he presumably wants to fix this problem. Everything I've said is under the assumption that he still wants to be in a relationship with her, otherwise I'd be telling him to dump her for being so immature.
I've just left her and sent her a cute pic to help cheer her up. I'm stubborn and will stick by what I think is right. If I cave in now, then she'll expect me to cave in over all the other trivial arguments she starts
I understand what you're saying. I'm not sure if I want to fix the relationship or breakup. I disagree with me being childish, I understand its a petty thing to argue over but she is the one who started it, I just don't want to cave into her because I'll resent her.
I'm really ugly, but girls always say personality is more important. Not that any will be on on a Saturday night.
What can I do and say to be more attractive in this way, improve my character so to speak.
>I'm not sure if I want to fix the relationship or breakup.
See, I'm convinced you're doing the right thing because of this point. If you'd been specifically asking what to do to keep this relationship, then maybe another course of action is in order. But if you're not ever sure how much you want this relationship, it's best to just stick to whatever you feel would be best for you. So long as you accept that there's a risk it will negatively impact this relationship, I don't see any problem in being willing to draw a line in the sand for this issue.
>Go after the right kinda women and it's cash as fuck.
Not that guy, but how do you find those kind of people? I entered the dating world late -- in my twenties -- and now I keep entering relationships with the wrong people.
Thankyou for your advice anon :)
Yeah if it ends so be it. If she wants to be immature and flip this to be my fault I wont put up with it. This isn't a first something like this has happened. There's constant double standards in this relationship and its like being on a minefield where the mines shift, some things I saw annoy her and sometimes the same thing wont annoy her.
I was always taught to stand up for myself and I'm doing that. If I was nasty about it or unreasonable I'd apologize, but I wasn't at all. I am allowed to speak my mind which is what I did
I learned that good guys never finish recently
>roommate meets girl he likes, asks me to come along with her and others so he's not the only guy
>go there, instant connection between her and I
>I act like good friend, I stay out of it and let him try to do his thing
>fast forward two months, he never asks her out, is basically a beta orbiter
>I later meet up with her to discuss the situation
>we talk about him for a little bit, rest of the time we talk about our feelings and we confess that we like each other
>because of situation, we decide not to do anything for a while until we tell him the truth
>we text frequently all throughout winter break
>get back to school, she starts talking to me less
>we haven't seen each other in person ever since
>feel alone and forgotten, but at least my friend has his chance now
>he tells me he lost interest over the break, now just friends with her
>mfw I lose the perfect girl for me being the good guy
>mfw he just loses interest despite my sacrifice for him
>I've never felt so alone, so forgotten, and so betrayed in my life
>I don't know what to do /adv/ anymore
why do people do this?
Girl says she wants to hang out with me or I ask girl to hang out and they are enthusiastic about the idea and say yes, but after that you never hear from them even if you ask them what's up?
Is it a lack of interest, anxiety, or just saying yes and then ignoring because that's easier than saying no/
If I'm into the same woman as a friend of mine I'd talk to him with the goal to more or less agree to not make a move, on the premise that he will actually ask her out.
Of course he knows nothing of what you did for him, because you did it without talking about it.