I'm just sitting in my room when all of a sudden I remember how soul crushingly lonely I am. My housemate has left for a few days and I get socialisation at work, but I'm fucking /lonely/
it's like 10pm, and the only person i'd be comfortable with from work is in another city right now, huh.
got the radio on so it sounds like there's another human in the room with me at least
Go to bed, wake up early next morning and do whatever it takes for that day to be productive so at 5pm you can say 'fuck it, I'm done' and hang out with friends later. It's Friday night at that point after all.
I went out and did shit
I currently do martial arts 3 nights a week and dance lessons 1 night a week and attend running club 2 nights a week.
90% of life is simply showing up, go out and find something to do
I don't have the time. I'm at university and I work part time, and have societies and things. But I've got terrible intimacy issues that I can't seem to get the fuck over. So, yeah, I'm surrounded by people who enjoy being with me, but I can't get that physical comfort. I just want a big ol' hug.
not to hijack OPs thread but i often wonder why nobody bothers trying to reach out to me. i never get a text message or an email or anything out of the blue, my band which meets once a week keeps in contact to set up scheduling and my girlfriend and my parents, but thats like 5 people. i wonder if it's just laziness or something. i don't really have facebook or anything so i understand its harder to remember i exist but i just feel like nobody cares about me. i have been seriously suicidal for the past 6 months and only a handful of people including my most immediate family have ever asked me how i have been in any serious capacity, meanwhile i always try and reach out to people i know well but havent seen to see how theyre doing, even when i meet up most of the time we talk about them, i wonder sometimes "maybe they have the same feeling about being lonely i do", but i doubt they have to convince themselves to not commit suicide every day like i do. i know there's no answer to this i just feel like venting about how lonely i am.