>tfw a girl you hooked up with flakes out on you
I feel so crappy. I spent months on online dating, finally found a girl I thought I'd have something real with. Went on 3 dates with her, had a great time, we ended up having sex on the third... and then she just kinda drifted away, never available, stops answering calls/texts. I feel really dejected. I mean, she was the first girl I had slept with in a while, and although we had sex 3 times in one night, made me wonder if it was really bad sex for her or if she was just lying to me about it being great.
I mean, and don't get me wrong, I REALLY went through hundreds of girls in online dating until this one girl I was attracted to gave me a chance. And now she's gone, and I'm back to square one. I've gone on other dates from this site and they either cut the date short and never want to talk again, or they have some horribly obvious problem like stinking breath that ruins any kind of attraction I might have had.
How do I get over it guys? Should I give up on online dating and just try to meet people in real life? Do I try to work on myself and just ignore dating for a while; I'm thinking maybe these girls just see me as some broke college student working part-time and lose interest: the fact is my life isn't very together even though I'm 24.
I feel like my whole 20s, which is supposed to be the time I'm having a decent sex life, is just being wasted away, and the only thing I get is rejection at the end of the day.
POF, I'm Canadian
I guess but like... fuck man I really liked this girl. I'm just trying to forget her now, felt like we had something but I guess she's not a serious girl.
For years I was really anxious about making moves on women. I guess online dating helped me get past the "training wheels" stage of dating, I'm basically a recovered weeaboo/neckbeard who cleaned up his act a lot, worked on social skills, hygiene/fashion. It felt like I "learned" a lot about how to date girls through this website.
Maybe you guys are right and I'm finally ready for "real life" dating, but the only problem is I've got few friends in "real life" and I'm trying to build back up my relationships with people.
For years I was that shy, quiet nerdy guy. But I think I've finally got the balls to just start talking to girls in real life.
Honestly maybe some more questions into this would be better
How do I go about meeting girls IRL? I don't want to be stuck with Tinder and POF and OKCupid for the rest of my life... where do people meet? I have very few friends, everybody I know is always working/busy, most are either in LTRs or too damn busy working...
Don't get too attached to girls you meet on dating websites. You have to remember that they are most likely talking to men other than you.
You probably have more success if you tried talking to serval women at once. Both offline and online.
OK big update
The girl called me and it turns out the same day she started flaking out on me, she found out her mother was dying from cancer. She called and explained to me that she's been really messed up, missing work shifts, ignoring friends and not sure if she'll have to travel back to see her parents.
I mean don't get me wrong, I get that she might be lying, but I felt a real connection with this girl but somehow I feel she was telling the truth.
In any case, I feel a lot more ease of mind that she gave me an explanation. I've left the ball in her court, if she wants to call me back I've told her I'm there if she wants to talk. Ok with even just being a friend since she was actually a really cool girl.
Glad at least we got to spend one really great night and morning together.
Man the truth is... I was logging plenty of times to see if she was online talking to other guys. And even though other girls were, she never was. Once she started dating me, she never seemed to go online again. In fact, she made her pictures private the day she told me she found out her mom got cancer.
I mean, all in all I'm just glad I got some peace of mind. I'll date other girls but it's good to know it wasn't my fault that things didn't work out. I'd like it if she calls me back, but I'm not waiting for her.
>I feel like we had something
honestly and I'm not going to lie, we're both sort of autistic and weird. probably why we both seemed to be into each other.
she admitted she never dated in high school and was very nervous about relationships until recently. clearly a nerdy, shyer girl, but very independent and bold at times.
also one thing we both told each other is that we both taught ourselves the dwarvish/elvish languages from lord of the rings as kids. along with both of us knowing tons of stuff about marvel/xmen. I got her into star wars too, she said she wanted to watch the original trilogy with me. I know it sounds dumb, but I've never gotten laid to an xmen movie before.
we had sex 3 times in one night, then morning sex and breakfast when we woke up. it was a damn good night. i strongly felt like she was a keeper.
Well, I just talked to her today after she called me back, and she said she just needs some place. I told her I'd be there for her.
I understand how finding out your mom has cancer can mess with a person's head. I'd rather just wait for her to say something. In the meantime, I'll date other girls and fondly remember the dates we had.
You know what OP? You were pointed out about the ways of your autism and boldly accepted them. I respect you for that.
See people? OP realizes his needy ways and decides to find comfort and enjoyment in them as well as share them with a woman he cares about. Is he autistic? Sure. But he's brave enough to admit it and bold enough to keep his chin up and keep trying. This is why you other anons are single. Because you won't do what he does.
Thanks bros. She's one of the only girls I've ever met who I felt I didn't have to "pretend" to be a "normal person". I could just be my weird, autistic self, and she'd laugh at my jokes and want to give me a kiss. It was great.
I totally understand she just needs her space, might need to travel across the country, right now she's thinking "Will I ever see mom again?" and she needs that space to deal with her own issues.
I've already got another date set up, and I guess I'd be cool with dating other women for a while, but I'll always have a space in my mind for her. If she reaches out again, I'm definitely glad to see her again.