I resently discovered that not only I'm not an ugly fuck, but that actually I'm quite handsome. It's been overwhelming, to say the least. It's not like I had absolutely zero confidence, I just always assumed I was a 5/10 with highly above average intelligence, so I always figured my intelligence compensated for my looks. But then I started noticing girls staring at me when I'm walking, I've even seen some biting their lip and staring at my ass. Random 7-8/10 girls start conversations with me, and are very flirty. Hell, they even laugh at my jokes. My jokes are NOT funny. My jokes are about endocrinology, genetics, nutrition, medicine, themes like that, and I know they aren't party-tier. Not even my classmates like them.
I have absolutely no idea how to stop the aspie inside me to control my thoughts evey time a qt talks to me. I know I could bang many of them, but I just drop spaggetti every time they talk to me, and I can't even start a conversation with a girl.
I'm not cringe-worthy, and can hold up a conversation really well, but I always end up rejecting them unconsiously.
For example, I went out for a couple of drinks with this 9/10 I know from a few years back. Things were really smoothly, pleasant conversation, lots of sexual tension. Then we shared a cab home, I joke about not having any money and she said "you're staying with me".
You know what I fucking did? I said "relax, I do have money". I fucking rejected her.
I know that for an aspie I'm not that bad, but I would like to know if you guise know any tips to help me go to the other side where I don't do this sort of stupid things.
TL;DR: a lot of women find me very attractive but I'm too beta to do anything about it, and when I get the chance, I blow it. Also, good at keeping conversations, but horrible at initiating them.
I wanted to use this:
next time before you say something,
think about the >implications and consequences of what you're saying. Understand that its sometimes better to not say anything at all than to speak without any thought behind it
If you're really have "highly above avg. intelligence" this should not be hard
It's really hard with ADHD, sometimes I drift away when I do that, and rarely come back without someone else snaping me out of my daydream.
Anyway, already on therapy about it, so I guess I'm already doing what I should be doing about this issue.
Any tips on initiating conversation with strange women, though?
Dude, just roll with it. Confidence does not come overnight.
Now that you've made this discovery, just practice on it. Not many folks can say to themselves that they are handsome/cute.
Initiating conversation is nerve-racking, but that too can be fully developed with practice. I guarentee you will fuck up the first few times, but you will succeed other times.
Personally, making people laugh (no matter the sex) is the best way to make yourself comfortable at any given context. In my experience, talking to the men at a given party first helps me ease into the venue. After I've made a few acquaintances, shit, they would sometimes introduce me to the chicks! But if that doesn't happen, at least you know people there.
After that, after I became comfortable, I would then start chatting it up with some of the chicks.
This, of course, is my own experience, take it as you will. It's all about building YOUR method of speaking with chicks.
Trust me dude, I went through exactly what you described. Of course, don't become an arrgoant asshole either! That can happen.
Here's a link that somewhat gave me some foundation.
http://www. mode. com/stories/12-things-confident-men-do-differently/11781683
Again though, YOU have to make your method. It will take time.
You will have awkard moments.
But you will succeed, if you have perseverance. Everything starts with you, so work on you first.
(Also alcohol and some predy gud friends help a long way)
Forgot to mention, /fa/ is another pretty solid spot to start. You'll know how to dress well (good way to build confidence), just don't mind the many assholes that thrive in there. Some mean good.
/fit/ is predy gud too, but I haven't been in a long while.
>a lot of women find me very attractive but I'm too beta to do anything about it, and when I get the chance, I blow it. Also, good at keeping conversations, but horrible at initiating them.
They don't find you attractive
you are a self centered asshole most likely won't never get laid outside whores.
Get some therapy so you can become a better person seriously.
>implying I get laid
Already going to therapy, m8.
Anyway, actually I'm usually on /fit/, but might go to /fa/ for advice, really good idea.
Will give that a read. Thanks Anon.
I actually been lifting for 2 years and the only noteworthy injury I've had was while jogging.
Even if /fa/ suggests expensive clothing, I'll take it as a base and go for cheaper similar clothing.