Well, /adv/, I'm just gonna get straight to the story
I'm a senior in HS and I've been dating this girl since the end of sophomore year. She is basically perfect; long golden blond hair, vivid bright blue eyes, 5'3, long legs. Her smile is so perfect, seeing it makes me smile. She acts so cute, especially around me, and it drives me nuts. We do everything together, she taught me to love whatever I was doing, regardless of what it was. I actually got excited for math class at 7:00 AM because I sat next to her. We even go on family vacations together, because we can't stand to be apart for very long.
So, long story short, this girl means everything to me, she's my whole world. However, there's a big problem. This last week she was acting really weird around me, yesterday she broke down and told me why. Two weekends ago, she was at her friends house. I was helping my buddy move, so I didn't go. I guess it was kind of a party because people were drinking and guys showed up. She got drunk on a dare and then got crazy with her friends, and college guys kept trying to get them alone, and at the end of the night, one offered to bring her home. She doesn't remember much but she lost her virginity to him that night and woke up in his bed. I love her but she just killed the way I saw her, all of my trust and our relationship. She gave some random frat kid her flower, for nothing.
She keeps begging me to forgive her. What do I do?
Move on. In two years, you'll never think of her again. You'll literally meet like 5000 new girls in the next five years.
They are all sluts, manipulative, clingy, and crazy. Get used to it.
Source: 30 year old anon
Stop shaming the poor girl for having sex would probably be a good start. She obviously feels like shit about it and you thinking her virginity is so fucking special isn't helping.
You just break up with her and move on. These are things that happen in the real world. You either end it now and it sucks, or you end it later and feel like a gigantic beta for putting up with it for so long.
I'm an alcoholic and black out at least a couple of times a week. I've never once woken up in a random bed while I was in a relationship. Even drunk me has some moral compass. He occasionally even does dishes. The moral of the story is, unless the girl was roofied, she probably wasn't doing much to stay faithful.
Side note, why didn't you have sex with her after dating for more than a year? It's all becoming clear now....
Congrats, you just got cucked for the first time.
Now your options are:
a) Embrace being a cuck, start posting on reddit and let her boss you around forever.
b) Start posting on /r9k/ and become a paranoid schizophrenic woman-hating autist.
c) Realize your own shortcomings and weaknesses, and set out on the path to becoming a strong, virtuous man, the kind she deserved.
We were about to, because we were going to stay at her vacation home in Hawaii. Before that she kept telling me she wasn't ready, but we did lots of other stuff. Just about everything else.
There really are a lot of stories about being cheated on on /adv/. Men and women (though I'll admit slightly more women, at least on /adv/).
Is it because it's such a common problem, or is it something that people are more willing to ask the internet? Or is it just one guy trying to get the people here to lose faith in love?
That would be cool and pathetic and the same time.
Your girlfriend at best made a mistake while drunk and at worst was possibly sexually assaulted and we have 2 people already going she must be the manipulative whore.
I dont really care what you do. However, it is likely that one day you will be on the other side of the situation where either you make a drunken mistake or you realise you are trying to get women drunk and offer them rides to coerce or force sex out of them.
You owe her a clear and mature explanation that because you see the situation as entirely her fault you cannot see her the same way and therefore you will end it.
Well, now you won't be having sex with her at all since you're breaking up right?
You wouldn't stay with somebody who tells you she isn't ready and then drunk bangs some dude, right?
You do have some self respect, right?
It's the jewish subversion of traditional Christian european morality m8
"Drunken mistakes" are still unacceptable and anyone with an ounce of self-respect would not allow themselves to put up with it.
Cheating is pretty common in the real world. I wouldn't say the majority of relationships, but I've definitely encountered it a lot. It also sounds cynical, but I imagine for every person who finds out they were cheated on, there's at least one person who got away with it.
I've seen plenty of friends cheat on their SO, maybe half of the time the 'cheatee' found out.
People wouldn't do it if they got caught 100% of the time.
It is because society puts a lot of onus on women for matters relating to sex. In OP's story, a guy literally got his gf drunk and alone on the premise of a ride home then raped her. This apparently makes HER the whore. That is pretty fucked up.
That's a good attitude OP, break up with her ASAP. Keep it clean, polite and drama free. She made a mistake a broke the trust of the relationship, but don't stick around otherwise it's on you. Get out, go find someone else and don't wait so long for sex next time.
Do you think people become sober the moment they realise this guy raped someone else? If this is your reaction to her being sexually assaulted it is obvious you never even loved her to begin with anyway, so why act so butthurt on behalf of what literally is a shitty thing to happen to someone else?
You need to stop being on the internet.
>Gets crazt drunk with friend
>While boyfriend is away
>spends all night drinking in a group involving a college student
>Identifies, when drunk that the college student is looking to hook up
>Guy offers to take her home
>wakes up in the guy bed
Just no. Learn some responsibility please.
Just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean she has to have sex with you, and can't with anyone else. Her body, her choice. Your job is to support her no matter what. That's really misogynistic to be mad at her for expressing her sexuality or being independent of you. You should apologize to her.
Wow, man. I feel so sad for you. You are so delusional that it's honestly astonishing. You seem to be in denial so bad for some reason. I hope you get help, man. You're really really blind...
Bit of both. It really happens, but the easiest way to b8 /adv/ is cheating threads or "Was it cheating or rape?" threads.
Not sure with this thread.
So OP broke up with her and fucked his elementary school crush right before making the thread, or immediately after making it and didn't need any advice anyway. Or technically cheated himself to get even, then broke up? Sounds legit.
god forbid she makes a mistake. honestly, move on, but staying around just to fuck other people makes you look even more immature than her. and this seems to be more about the virginity than the cheating so you're probably a dick anyway.
there's literally nothing special about virginity, and itll probably be better for her self esteem
She's a piece of garbage for what she did, if he's to be believed
Actually they do, right up until they demonstrate they're not worth shit.
Don't give advice on this site.
Go back to tumblr. You don't know if the guy was drunk too. A girl being drunk doesn't make her irresponsible for her actions. Cheating men are also jerks, nothing to do with the fact that what OP is talking about is a girl.
The problem with girls like this is they've already proved they are incapable of avoiding "mistakes" like this.
How can you trust her to never do this again? It's as if someone hands you a phone and tells you not to text "nice tits mum" to their mother, and then you just go and fucking do it. I mean it's tempting as shit, but holy shit you never followed basic orders this guy gave, when you typed it in did you really expect him to trust you ever fucking again with his phone? Probably not.
She broke your trust, and there is no way you should give it to her again, her being drunk, virgin, or with friends makes no difference. There is a simple rule to not cheat whilst in a relationship, and she broke it, who the fuck does she think she is to just ask you for forgiveness when she can hardly follow a basic rule?
And broke up with her "30min ago" as of one post made 20min after the start of the thread. Amazing what someone can do in 20min while keeping /adv/ updated, without ever letting on that he already broke up with her.
Two possibilities really,
1, She had a moment of weakness and decided that you and her are not worth shit so got railed by chad randomdick.
2, Her special flower went many years ago and had had miles of dick ploughing through it but she had to come up with the V story to attract and keep you. The trip to Hawaii would have blown that right through (in her mind) so she came up with this bull.
I guess that either works as an eject button – glad to see you pressed it.
PS. - Don’t tell her why as it will ruin your rep.
>Le I was drunk so I got on top of the first dick I saw
Hmm I don't know, if a cop busted you for speeding and you turned out to be drunk, do you think the law will be any easier for you? First of all, when you're in a relationship you most definitely should not be putting yourself in positions and locations where people typically "hook up"....This isn't to say you can't hang out with your friends, but certain boundaries need to be drawn.
If I was you OP I'd just end it, I know now it feels like this is the only girl that will ever love you but it isn't. I had my ex cheat on me too, and whereas in my mind I know she was lying when she said "she did nothing with T that night" it always lingered in my mind that she was sleeping around, and the relationship was never the same. I was way too suspicious of her and I just didn't trust anymore and when we inevitably broke up she of course told me that she did in fact sleep with T just to hurt my feelings.
You're still young, there will be other girls.
FUCK OFF EVERYONE ITS SERIOUS I LOVE HER AND I DONT CARE IF I AM SECOND PLACE SHE SAID HER FLOWER IS FRESH AND SHEL DONT REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED SO IT STILL COUNTS U CANT JUST SAY THIS ABOUT A RELATIONSHIP U DONT UNDERSTAND
I don't even know why this is even a question. If it bothers you that much then just break up, duh. Why spend months or years being salty about this when you can move on with someone new? According to you, the girl you loved is forever gone anyway, so no point in dragging this out.