Thank you guys, for helping to open my eyes the other night. It was mentally painful and I literally almost cried, but it needed to happen and I know what I must do now. Can only go up from here. I'm surprised it took me this long to realize it, but better late than never.
Hopefully this doesn't ruin everything. If it does, I'll miss you guys. Godspeed.
>>16667294 This is not something you should be writing in a letter that never gets read. Tell this person. Knowing that they have your support even if they don't actually lean on you could make a big difference. Tell them!
It all seemed so good, and then you left me for him. You're the most beautiful woman I've ever known, I've never loved someone like I loved you. You're an angel, the only woman who's ever made me feel happy, you fucking slut whore.
A, You only look for temporary gratification. You never deserved the love I gave you and I wish I never met you. You betrayed me, I left, and now you're "sad" because I don't want to be your friend after what you did. Get in a car crash for all I care. I helped you escape an abusive relationship only for you to become someone more abusive than your previous ex. Fuck you and everyone you associate with, slut. -T
>>16667171 Alison Sorry for being weird and horrible to you. I'm sure you don't even think about me any more but I wish we could talk again. You're one of the only people I've been able to talk to and as I get older and more awkward I doubt I'll ever experience that again.
Holly, Sorry for being miserable all the time. I really liked you but I was so obsessed with making money at the time I probably just came across as a bit of a maniac. It didn't take you long to see me for the weirdo that I am but if I'd been more relaxed we'd probably be together now.
I like this place better. Only thing is I can't express myself to the fullest due to English not being my first language. But I like being an anon in here. In 4chan nobody will find out my identity like you did, I'm safe. Maybe I wanted to be found out.
I'm too tired to hate someone, so stop thinking I hate you. I'm just passing the days until nature takes me. Very few people know that I have less of a lifespan than most people. It's nothing immediate, but my own mother will live to attend my funeral. I'm not even sad, but I have given up on the whole "see the best in people" that I kept trying to hold onto for years. My deceased brother's birthday is on Tuesday, I have that to feel pathetic over rather than hold onto hostility towards you. I have my own stupidity to reflect on rather than wish ill towards you. Whether you wish ill towards me, I really don't have it in me anymore. If you hate me, know that I hate myself more than you ever could. No, I'm not gonna commit suicide, though. The knowledge that I probably won't live past another 30 years is enough
Are you a female? I know is sick, but I always wanted to date someone with a terminal decease. I'll treat you with the best care in the world until you die. I think I like playing the victim part and helping others, so is a win, win. Please let me know.
First, thanks for providing so much entertainment for me. I found your blog. I read it every night before I go to sleep. Reading about your pathetic, creepy escapades helps me sleep a little better at night.
Despite that, I wanted to tell you how disgusting you are. You're not trans, you're looking for attention. It's laughable how transparent you are. Every time "Chibi" mentions something she's interested in, you glom onto it like a leech. She's dating someone with black hair? You dye your hair black. She comes out as asexual? Suddenly your blog is filled with "I'd date an asexual" fluffy feelgood posts. She immerses herself in Tumblr culture? What a surprise, you're suddenly trans!
Not to mention all the bullshit you've written about "Sasuke" (by the way, your nicknames for everyone are SO cute). "Manipulative"? "Prima donna"? Aren't you projecting a little? Admit it--you started a fight because you saw he was progressing without you. He made friends easily, and that made you anxious, so you told lies about them. Telling him that your roommate doesn't use soap? Hilariously obvious of you. You want to act like "Sasuke" was "too competitive" for you, but really it just upset you that you could never beat him at anything. Madden. Yugioh. Yugioh? How fucking childish and petty ARE you? To throw a tantrum because you couldn't win at a kid's card game?
If I ever see you in person, I'd like to tell you what a little worm you are, but honestly, I'd probably be too busy laughing at you and wouldn't be able to get a word in. But I hope I do see you. I want to see your awful makeup and dye job in person. Sometimes I can't believe you are real. My own little personal Chris-chan Lite™. Until then, "Natalie".
I'm posting most of your name because I secretly wish you read this. Fact is, even though I haven't seen you in over 7 years, I love you. I think about you more times than I would care to admit. Every time I try to forget about you, I have vivid dreams where you come back to me.
I rejected you all those years ago because I didn't want to admit I was bisexual. I've come to terms with it now, and my biggest regret in life was rejecting your advances. You were the best friend I had; why didn't I see that? Why did I have to deny my sexuality and my feelings?
I learnt recently that you have had a boyfriend for at least 2 years. This pains me, but I sincerely hope he brings you happiness.
I know the breakup hurt you. It has been killing me, I'm sorry. It's been a year ad I'm still hurting. i just wish I could tell you how sorry i am. i wish things had turned out a different way. i haven't been this sad in years. You truly changed my life. I changed yours too, sadly, in a worse way. i still talk to Mikey, I'm happy with Zoe. Luca, You felt more than a boyfriend, you were my family and so was your family. I've never felt more hurt then when you didn't tell me that grandma passed away. 2 years i was part of your family, you were a part of mine as well. I guess to sum this up. Luca I love you, I still do, I know it's hard being trans, but one day you'll be fine, you'll be different. i'm Sorry Luca, i'm sorry Savannah. i miss you as a friend and a brother.
You know I'm over it right? I'm not desperate by any means, and am not waiting for you to be on fb or something. I'm not going to write. I liked you for you but you were too wishy washy to even be a friend. All I needed to hear was truth. Everyone is such a fucking pussy these days.
>Fine. I do not like myself. I hate what I have become. I have only proven to myself that I can not let go of anything. The black hole inside of me is still there. And fine I got out of control and fine I have gone not a step but a foot fucking back. But fuck seriously no offence it would have come out anyway. So in all honesty you were actually honest about your own feelings. Just you did it screaming and ranting and yeah truth hurts and to tell the truth. You do hate it here. You don't trust anyone. You feel as if it has become corrupted. The staff don't care, let's face it the other residents don't either. They want to see you fall. And in all honest you love suicide missions. When you have a death wish and people are out to crush you. That is when you act the best. That is when you don't hold back. That is when you will not fall.........you mother fucker. Fine literally I do have faith just push hard tomorrow morning and yeah be honest. When they ask "How was your weekend?"just go. "In all honesty it was going good until in a massive rant that was in pure panic I showed a side of myself that well was a truth. But it just all came out. Everyone hates me know. But now that I have said it. I feel better about myself unfortunately it has put me right at the bottom of the social mountain. But has given me incentive to still sort my shit out alot more hardcore and focused know. So finally saying what was a painful truth of what I think of this place. Has caused me to just give up not caring but the anger like I just needed to say it to just accept it and not let it be a negative. But a positive fine truth fucking hurts but sooner or later the lie to keep yourself going on will catch up. And it is a slim chance it will just go away as you move on. Only really if you get an opportunity to start somewhere far away. And I'am far away from that opportunity of a second chance. I have lost count now how many chances I burned. this is going to be a fucking fun 3 months".
I realised my game was best before I even knew what game was. Game fucked my shit up maine. And now these bitches don't respect and love me anymore :( They used to call me, you know. Now, nothing. They only hate on me :(
"It's not fair?" It's not fair how you treat me. I may be under your roof but I am not a child anymore. Though certain things may not be entirely your fault. I can't explain why I am such a private person. But I know that waiting days, months, years, to do the things I want in order to not upset you is breaking me apart. I have ambitions. I don't feel comfortable pursuing a single thing because you do not stop berating me verbally. I am never good enough for you, I am always a disappointment. You threaten me with your own death, but how do we spend time together? I watch you watch television. I think our relationship is sick in some ways, and it makes me feel dead and tired. I wish I could be comfortable with you, as your child who is now an adult. I'm crying because I have no idea what I should do. I want to make you happy with me, but I want to live my own life. And it is painful trying to make my own way. It's perhaps even more painful when I'm bound by those who love me.
To no one in particular, Living a life to make others happy, eventually leads to your downfall. I've spent all my life focusing on the wellbeing of others, with no one returning that favor. Everyone eventually moves on in life, and your good deeds are forgotten. As you mature, you see people for what they truly are. When you have no friends, no family, or a loved on to lean on. Living is truly difficult. Your peers view you as an outcast, strangers see right through you. Take chances while your still young, make mistakes, and follow your heart. I didn't believe my elders when they said life is short, but it truly is. For me, it's too late.
Dear A, I really cared about you, thought you cared about me too. I will always fo, even if you don't talk to me anymore. I miss you so much, every day. Fuck your anxiety and depression get your shit sorted out.
>nobody says it >get boxed into a stereotype by a group, ur this, ur a loser, I like u, I need u, I hate u because etc >ur my blaze buddy, my bff, my enemy, my etc. buddy, my ex, etc die, kill urself >more than glad to have to have interesting and unique friendships with unique friends, wow everyone is connecting with each other on the surface >sudden animosity sparks, because of jealousy in group politics, ur this what I don't believe what u say, u lie, what who's that, ur doing what hobby, u fail >wow I can walk away now I have stuff to do, besides I don't feel welcome anymore her- >suddenly wait a minute antisocial loser, I hate u, kill urself, ur friends never liked u, u will die alone, u'll work loser jobs, I'll never finish or amount to anything >can i just leav- >wait a fucking minute, u know u wont survive without us u fucking loser, yea be a loner, go kill yourself >ok, now u can go but remember what good friends we were asshole >....
Life is good just be thankful for what you have but then again this is 4chan so yeah I'll be six feet under eventually. I already picked a tall building to jump from.
Never tell anyone how you are doing just fake depression till you make it. Worked for me. Now I got a gf and a mansion.
Well it's definitely not better without you. Should have known that doing it wouldn't make me any different, wouldn't make me feel any different. At least I didn't ruin you, or I hope I didn't. If you're better off now than it was worth it, if you're not than I've made the biggest mistake of my life. I shouldn't have tried to change you, maybe you can be free now. I'll always love you
Right then, I know Valentine's Day is over a month away but god all I want to do is send you flowers and a cheesy card, or more lowkey a cute little stuffed animal, on that day. I want you to be my Valentine... And I know the day means nothing, it doesn't matter... But that's what I want.. I hope you'll say yes, if I work up the guts to ask you in a few weeks.
Please make me a manager. The more I see you work on other people at becoming managers instead of me the more it breaks my heart. I feel like I'll be at this job for 10 years and still not be a manager. I realize that I am a valuable employee to you, but this really hurts inside, and honestly, I know I said I would never leave you, but... I might one day leave you.
I hate always having to prove myself to people, and you're the one person I felt knew how hard of a worker I was. If you don't believe in me, how can I? If this person becomes a manager after this other person, I'm done. I'm sorry.
Where do I begin, I have a hard time sharing this with you but I don't think you love me, but my main problem is I don't know what love is. My parents never showed me and all my relationships only last for three months. Now I'm here with you living together. We're having a baby together and we were only together for three months when we found out. I just can't shake this gut feeling to run. The other night I couldn't shake the feeling so bad I went through your phone. I'm sorry. I found that you still lurk some of your exs face books casually which is cool cause I do it too but I also saw you went on POF on Christmas Eve , the weird thing is your profile is hidden and messages are deleted. This didn't help my feelings. It honestly doesn't hurt them though cause it could be for many reasons. I just want to feel secure in our relationship. I want to feel safe. I want to feel loved. I know I'm a pain in the ass and I know a lot of this is my fault but I don't want to feel like you're only with me cause of the baby anymore. I want the old us, the real us or I want to move on. I'm just gonna keep working on myself and if something doesn't change I'm leaving. I know I'm a runner and I always will be but I have to find happiness and this isn't it.
You were the brother I had lost, it's a real shame how things turned out but it is what it is. I do wish you the best and no grudges held. Regardless of everything you taught me a lot and I enjoyed your company, happy anniversary belated anniversary Jesse. I miss ya big bro. Cheers
>>16667171 Dear whomever. Everyone comes into your life with a purpose and when that purpose is fulfilled then it is time to let go despite the aching pain in your chest and constant thoughts of them them them.
I look for you everywhere and sometimes hope I pass you even though you've squirreled yourself into so many bad choices. Remember that love isn't just skin deep though, when you are older and the people around you lose the beauty they once had I hope you are happy with your decisions.
To the other, you hold nothing but detest for me. I see it in your face every day which is interesting because you are the one that got caught in your filthy little secret. I will never forget all of the pain you have caused me. I only cling to a thin strip of the loving and devoted person I once had. I will cherish our memories but cannot do so with you in this state.
I am outgrowing all of you and your petty ambitions and repetitive circle of fuck ups. I am willing to change and will do so without any of you and the rotting corpse that seems to linger in my head concerning you.
>>16670393 This happened to me too, anon. They always talked about how hard and great of a worker I was but then promoted someone else while I was gone on vacation. It's really not worth it if they are going to recognize your hard work and passion for the job. It was so hard for me to part with mine, and I said I would never leave. You should leave though and go somewhere where they will actually appreciate you. You will be so much happier.
>>16670594 I actually do want to continue working for them for the rest of my life, and have an actual job full time somewhere else.
I don't want management for the money, I want it to help my boss. That's all I want to do. I know 80% of everything a manager should know. I've been there for over a year. I realize it's about performance and not seniority, but fuck.
This really, really hurts. Every single day I am heartbroken. I'm fucking dying on the inside.
>>16670626 You're not writing to me, but I give up, man. I'm way too tired of trying to hold out for the bright spark that makes every other experience along the way worth having. I hope whoever you're writing to has the ability to, or at least has a good time ahead of them.
>>16670664 Holding on is all you can do, though. It's alright to feel down right now, but don't permanently give up, anon. I've given up before, I understand it, but just don't do it. It will get better, guaranteed. Especially if you don't give up. Because if you do give up, then yeah, you may never find that spark. There is beauty all around you, and that bright spark is within yourself, the people you love, and the beautiful things in the world. You'll find it eventually. Good luck.
>>16670577 To whoever left this carcass in my tree-hole: it smells. All I have done is all a squirrel ever does, gather tidbits and sleep and frolic. Why did you put this putrid thing in my home? How am I supposed to remove it, now that it is here? Oh! juices are starting to sink into our wood!
and, oh god, what am I going to tell Sally when she gets home? this is just absolutely foul and disgusting-- oh no, oh no, oh no.
She's going to think I had something to do with it, she'll think I killed this little bird and left it in the sun to go rancid.. Wait! What if it's all her fault, what if someone with a personal vendetta against my wife broke through our branches and left a threat? Fuck. Shit. Chigga chigga chigga. None of my usual methods of warding off intruders find purchase in the bark of an abstract fear. I'll find another tree.
--- OK I took way more creative license with this one than usual so Anon, please, don't take this as a response to you in any way.
>>16667171 Hey man. I know its been a while but i figured i have nothing to lose at this point. I gathered every last piece of my pride to write this. The thing about us was, that no matter how much we talked, we couldnt get enough of it. I remember when one of us wasnt here for a day the other would go nuts for them. We spent endless hours talking during summer nights, sharing together our lives. Its weird, but ive never met any person i could talk to like i did with you. So please give us one more chance. In the end its all up to you really. You broke me, so now im desperately hoping youd fix me. I really miss you and think about you everyday.
>>16670664 Do it. Give in, give up, be the old barn by the side of the road, all fallen in a pile of timber, growing fuzzy with lichens. Let yourself dry up and wither away until there's nothing left of you but a deftly arranged pile of tinder, waiting to fuel the spark the building fell for want of.
Hey. Long time no see man. I know you don't want anything to do me with and I understand that, because I was pretty shitty about things when we broke up but I just thought you'd want to know that my orange cat passed away recently. I know you really liked him a lot, and when we were together you talked about how you were curious about how Ds cats were, so I just thought I'd write this. I hope you're doing well. I miss you.
>>16670680 >>16670705 >>16670744 Giving up is just easier at this point. I just have this big gap in my chest where I used to be able to be optimistic. Where I can expect the best to come to those around me, but I'll always just be expecting the best for them and not for me. 2013-2015 has been an awful period for me minus a few brief sparks of enjoyment but those brief sparks were shallow, materialistic distractions for the most part. Even my family can see that my personality has drastically changed since 2014, came back a bit in 2015 then vanished again. My sister brought it up to me on Christmas Day and I was more distraught that it was so transparent that things were getting to me than I was the actual present reason for why I was down. Every day since New Year's Eve has been me thinking just how laughable my situation is, and if anyone else could see it they'd laugh too. I resigned myself to being a stepping stone for people to advance from and never need to look back, but the reality is that that is my perfect role because I'm quite easy to forget once you walk past. Like that of a stepping stone in a river.
At this point I'm just throwing a pathetic pity party for myself, though. tl;dr is simply I've resigned to just wishing others the best and I'm willing to just stay in my rut.
>>16670893 Yet I'd bet that some people don't forget about you, because you're worth more than that. Everyone is. And you'll figure that out someday. It's fine to throw a pity party for yourself, but afterwards you should at least try to improve your situation, because it is definitely possible.
But only you can convince yourself of this, so best of luck and just don't give up. For now, sure, but not forever. I don't know you, but I'm sure you have a long life ahead of you and a fair amount of years behind you, don't squander it cause 3 years of it have been shitty.
The way things are right now could be a lot better, but I'm oddly content. Even though we can't be together because of distance, it's amazing what's happened between us in the past few months. The mutual feelings of love between us are incredible and other people are taking notice despite us continuing to be simply best friends. F made a comment in passing the other night about us obviously loving each other which surprised me a lot.
I'm glad we're both moving on with our lives though. I've got another few years of college but after that the world is our oyster and I'd like to do some of that traveling we've been talking about for years.
It feels so right to be going in this direction with you, best friend. I love you.
I miss you, E. I really do. But you taught me some important lessons... You taught me to never get too invested in someone if they aren't as invested in you. The way you ended things was cruel, but it's made me a stronger person in the end, and strangely enough, I thank you for that. Without you and all the pain you caused me, I wouldn't have accomplished any of the positive things I have recently. I wouldn't be where I am today if it weren't for you.
>>16671341 This seemed familiar and I almost thought it was written by someone I know to me, until I noticed the contradiction in the letter. That gave me an odd sense of relief knowing it couldn't have been him. I guess I have to thank you for making me realize I still care what M___ thinks about me
D, Still miss you. But it's been damn near a year. We've been broken up longer than we actually dated. Dunno why I still think about you as often as I do. Honestly, if called me right now I'd answer, though I don't know what I could say. I know you won't. But part of me hopes. -J
I love you. Always have and probably always wil. It's hard to see you talk about people you're seeing and it's hard for me to tell you about the ones I'm seeing but part of me feels 100% certain you don't feel the same way nor will you ever feel that way and the other part thinks that you do but you know I need some working on.
Started from when I mustered up all the strength within me for a solid 3 days to finally say "hi" and introduce myself to you.
You were an exemplary physical specimen. Perfect smile, Deep brown eyes, the body of a rock star, and well dressed (for the most part) I knew it would never be though. Our lives were headed in two different directions and we both came from different back grounds.
Just friends though.
My attraction to you didn't go much deeper than that because I barely knew anything about you personally.
(Added on Facebook)
You turned out to be a sarcastic fuck, with a genuinely kind heart. You knew how to laugh at yourself as well as take the heat from you friends playfully dissing on you. (I can dig it) All I could do was watch as the first years of my college experience drifted away and before I knew it I was going through the motions letting life take its course all the while coming to the realization that I could never be enough for you.
I'd occasionally post on your wall in an effort to start a conversation and deny the fact that we'd never cross paths again, but I could see your wall (Psychologically) was up as I got no reply. You kept interaction stagnant and only let people who were a part of your community within your social circle. (I respect that)
I wanted more though.
Love at first sight is a joke. Anyone who tells you otherwise is an idiot. I was infatuated with you and eventually fell in love with the idea of the person I assumed you to be based off my own knowledge of you...
You get the gist of where I'm coming from though. I wish you the best and wish we could be something more. You'd probably laugh at this letter which I don't blame you for. I would too.
Oh, I'm impressed. You really did just use the boy to make her jealous so she'd actively seek to spend time with you. I take back what I said not that long ago about you not being so bad, you actually are fucking disgusting, Jose. Not that the boy wasn't almost as bad, but yes I guess I'll thank you for yet again proving I can't fucking believe in anyone actually having a decent bone in their body.
Just go tell her how much you love her so you can fuck off out of the picture together. Watching you toy with anyone you can is sickening.
A, I'm sorry you've had feelings for me for such a long time. I'm sorry that I've been with someone else for the past five years. I'm sorry that I used to feel the same about you. I'm sorry I keep hurting you. -C
I love you. I love you. I love you. I don't know what I did or if I even did anything to make you leave. Maybe you just got tired of me. I wish I knew. Everyone is saying I don't really miss you and I just miss the way you made me feel, but I really really miss you. Your smile and your laugh and how you love space so much and always made really stupid jokes and laughed so hard at them Maybe I'm just romanticizing. I kept telling myself you were only hurting me because you were depressed but maybe you changed. I only wanted to make you happy. It's stupid of me but I keep looking back at old pictures and messages. Wishing you still loved me now like you did then. I'm trying to forget about you but it's so hard. Everything reminds me of you. I can't help but hope that someday you'll come back and love me again, even if it's not good for me. I lost my best friend and the love of my life. I'm so empty. I'm sorry. And happy anniversary.
I spent 3 days on a sudden urge to change myself and it was terrible. It seems to be in the process of falling through but I feel like these emotional outbursts are like trying to snap a kneecap back into place. I am getting closer but the adjustment is still not complete and won't be for some time.
Reasoning: I am sure many readers on here feel far more confident in a game or forum, and I think my goal is to find a way to migrate the virtues of my own internet personality to the real world. Being two people is tiring, and I really do believe that my e-go has been hogging my competence and confidence. Do you feel like your "real self" could benefit from the reduction of your internet presence, /adv/?
I whished I had the courage to tell you what I feel for you. I should have told you years ago, but I couldn't bring up the courage. Loving you, but not telling you, has poisened everything. It poisened our friendship, it poisened the way I behave around you. like a jelous paranoid maniac. but how was I supposed to feel? I felt threatened each day that this could be the day you settle for someone else. you are my best friend. I can't lose you. but I can't stay with you if you go for someone else. I just can't. I couldn't live with it. I don't know what to do. this feels like hell. it makes me depressed. being depressed turns you away from me, makes you think I'm a bitter person. maybe I am, but why am I that way? because of this fucked up shit with you. do you know? Never felt fucked up like this.
I remember you talking about how you mother used to make home-fried chicken in the high rises. I remember that you talked to me at two in the morning at that inner city bus-stop and made me feel at ease after a rough night and I needed just another person to talk to.
I don't know where you are now. I'm glad I got to share some of my food with you. But when you told me you were staying in a nearby motel and gave me your phone number, I should have called. I'm sure you were just lonely and wanted to talk to someone who actually cared.
I get that. Thanks for being there, even if that's just where we happened to end up being.
I hope you're alive. I hope you're living the life you wanted.
I asked you what kind of dreams you aspired to, and you couldn't really name anything. That made me sad.
I just really wish you would read my messages. You're supposed to be my boyfriend but you never seem to want to be with me. It hurts when I see you with other guys. Please pay me more attention, because I'm not alright
Hi M. I wanted to tell you that you looked beautiful today and that I love what you did to your hair. The point of this letter is to ask you out at a coffee shop sometimes and maybe eat some doughnuts from that place you really like. I've been meaning to get this off my chest since the moment I first saw you, but never figured out the words for it. Anyway, see you tomorrow.
E, You're a flower child; guardian of the trees. I always thought it was cute. I loved your name, despite how ugly your last name sounded in place of mine. I loved your jokes, despite the way you sometimes aimed to make me want to kill myself. I loved your face, despite how ugly you said you were. I liked to trace it, so as to memorize it in case I ever went blind. I saw you to be quite beautiful. I loved you, despite how horrible you were to me. It didn't matter, and I would ignore all the things you did.. out of love and stupidity. I chose to believe in you when I had no reason to trust a word you said and you let me down. again. and again. When I was working that day, and you showed up during the rush and I was trying to take the orders of 20 high schoolers, I jolted. It was you, as scrawny and unhealthy and sloppy as you looked, I suddenly felt manic. It was you, and you were once mine, and you could never be again because you fucked it all up. And that day, you forgot your damn chicken sandwich and I knew it was no mistake. You left your receipt on the counter for me to find and it was no mistake. You came back 3 minutes later and I handed you your damn sandwich, and you hugged me. I felt okay again, suddenly. I felt calm. But it was no mistake. I feel like you aimed to leave a mental scar there, and it worked. It really fucking worked. I'm about to be 19. I quit smoking, I'm studying French, I'm actually taking care of myself, my family speaks to me again, and you're nowhere near me. A year ago, I would've never believed that I would learn to hate you for everything you did. I was so madly and deeply in love that the future didn't matter. I wonder if you ever see my letters. I wonder if you're doing okay. M
I love you. I'm still so surprised that we are together. But I guess the unexpected things in life are some of the best. Being with you is one of the greatest things to ever happen to me. I would truly someday like to marry you. I hope we stay together long enough for that to happen. I'm sorry that I get so anxious/insecure/weird sometimes. Past relationships have kind of damaged my trust. It's not that I don't trust you (I do trust you), I just hate people and I don't trust anyone else. I'm just terrified of losing you. But I'm going to fight for this, because I love you and you're worth it. I promise I wont fuck up this semester. Thank you for being apart of my life.
I'm sorry for fucking up this last semester so bad and wasting time and money. I'm sorry for disrespecting you. I'm sorry for fucking up the car. I'm sorry for constantly stealing your alcohol. I love you.
Please don't get too stressed out or worry too much while I'm gone. Life is short and you need to just embrace the little things. I love you and I'll miss you. Please make sure D doesn't fuck up in school too bad.
I have loved you since we first met in middle school. To this day, while we are both in college, I remember the very first sentence you ever spoke to me. I hated myself for not trying harder to get with you in high school. It tore me apart whenever I saw you hanging out with other guys at parties, even though you and I had a special relationship.
I've liked you for a while now. You helped me get through a dark time in my life, and for that I'm very grateful. Recently you've been in that same place yourself: suicidal and depressed. I've helped you with this, I've kept you from going through with it multiple times and I've got you to get help for yourself. I'd expect at least some show of gratitude given that you literally owe me you being alive, but I got nothing. No thank you, no sign you cared about what I did. Instead you think some kid that could literally not care less about you is the one who has helped you the most. Fuck you. You don't deserve the help I've given you and if I didn't have a strong set of morals I would've told you to piss off a while ago.
I don't like you. I can't stand being around you. Everytime you open your mouth I want to punch you in your disgusting fucking face. You don't even speak words so much as let them ooze out of your mouth like a soft turd. And you fucking smell like an old folks home. You're such an unbelievably pretentious piece of shit, everything you like or enjoy is the most important thing on the planet. I don't give a shit about your stupid video game character or what cool item you found. IT'S A FUCKING VIDEO GAME AND HAS NO RELEVANCE TO MY LIFE! What would possible compel you to think anyone gives a shit? You're a complete parasite, leeching off the income mom so you can sit upstairs playing games in your underwear. You have absolutely no value to anyone, yet you somehow still think that you have the standing to tell others what life decisions they should make. Despite having absolutely NO relevant experience in the matter. The irrational confidence in your suggestions when they're completely devoid of logic or meaning is staggering. Everytime I have to visit for a holiday I have to sit in my car and calm myself down so I don't flip out and throw something at you for saying something stupid, but I still have to keep visiting for the sake of mom because she needs social interaction and not some worthless asshole who forces her to sit around at home all day watching shitty sports recaps. The only respite I get is knowing that your a morbidly obese tobacco user with high blood pressure, a shitty diet, and absolutely no exercise, so you're going to die relatively soon. I just wish you would hurry the fuck up sometimes. Nobody likes you, you're of no use to anyone.
I know that my lack of a sex drive mixed with your high sex drive is going to end up breaking our relationship. We fight about it weekly, as I am "not normal" and shouldn't get mad when you bring up sex as a topic. As much as I wish I could want it like you, I can't. I try..I try and please you every once in a while so that you will be happy but I just can't want you in that same sexual way that you and most of the population wants people. It's not me. I don't know what I am. I'm not asexual, i still have some sort of sex drive sometimes. It's just not normally. But you feel that the sexual aspect of a relationship is vital, whereas I don't see it as very important. I know that eventually we will end up parting ways because of this. It will just lead to more and more problems over the years. I love you. I do. But not in the same ways that you love me...I guess. Do I just wait it out or do we just break up now? I don't want to lose you as a person but I want you to be able to get your sexual urges out. Something that I can't always do for you. You won't go out and see other women. I understand that. You don't want me to end up upset and you don't want to fall for someone else. You love me more than anything. But its just not fair to you to have to be stuck with me, someone who doesn't need sex in their lives. I wish I knew what would happen in our future.
I don't know if I couldn't find the right time to tell you, or if I didn't want to find the right time to tell you. There is something about you that I can't explain, I don't know if others feel the same way about you. I just feel so weird about putting myself in a vulnerable position but I do care about you. I don't just care about you like the other guys do when you wear revealing shirts, but on the days that you wear sweatpants to school, or have a cold.
I know you're having a tough time of things lately, and I do my best to make sure I'm always there for you no matter what. But its been 5 years and I can't believe you haven't realized how little of a handle i have on my own life. I've been getting counselling for far too long now to be able to tell you about it.
Sometimes I think about leaving you when you speak to me like shit, because the good times i look forward to never seem to come around. But then again maybe i'm just depressed and using you as an excuse to justify my feelings.
I want to offer my sincerest apologizes for how I react to "the news". I should have never walked out on our relationship based on such trivial matters as your biology.
You being born a boy has nothing to do with who you are and the person you've desire to be.
The truth of the matter is that I miss you, girl. I really do. I've been chasing tail since I departed you constantly searching for that one woman who'll make me happy only to realize that it was you this entire time.
Yesterday you forgave me and gave me another chance, I was so afraid when you broke me up, I didn't believe it at frist and when you called me for going to your house I tought we were coming back but no.... Ihad this huge talk with you, and you forgave my inmaturity and childish ways, but still, watching you making a fist and criying when I told you that no matter if we're friends, lover, acquaitances I'd always be with you, it just broke me.... I swear, Jesus I don't ever want to see you like that again, I'm so stupid, fuck, how could I even made you cry and I may say I'll never hurt you again but th thing is I'll probably will with different things, a word, a gesture, I can't make you cry agian and I can't forgive myself for it.
You gave me a chance but I'm not sure if I actually deserve it, but I'm selfish and can't let you go, I love you so much, I can't see you cry again, so this time I'm really tiying.
What happens when your boyfriend of 3 years dumps you through a letter and you later found out he cheated on you.... Again. (No I won't Send this too him) and yes I was writing on the bus right after I found out so I wasn't really rational or writing nicely ... But here we go
Leave J alone. Seriously, stop snapping her. Stop messaging her on facebook, stop texting her. I know you two are friends and you made advances towards her but she said no and she's dating me. I'd appreciate it if you would just fuck off please. You're kind of a fuccboi and I think you're incredibly disrespectful.
You also leave J alone. Liking and commenting on all of her instagram posts is creepy and not going to get you anywhere. You're like 3 times my size but man, I'll still square up.
I love you, thank you for remaining faithful. You are absolutely amazing and I can't wait for what the future holds for us. I can't wait to travel with you. Every time you smile I melt. I'm so happy to call you mine.
I'm sorry you think I haven't put enough effort into our friendship. I just get anti-social and I know I don't see you much anymore because of college and everything but since I've been back in town I just felt really anti social and a bit depressed. That doesn't mean that I don't value our friendship though and everything that we've been through. I love you dude.
>>16667290 A, I think about you every fucking night and I can't get over you. I'm sorry I shit everything up. I didn't mean to hurt you. I thought I was "doing what's best for me" but it didn't work out. I don't think we can ever reconcile a relationship between the two of us, but I'm breaking up with S. It's been over for a while now. I just want to talk to you like we used to. J
Danielle, I'm sorry that I let our friendship drift so far apart that something so small could ruin it. I miss you. Almost every day something happens I wish I could talk to you about. I wish you could know that I blocked him on facebook. I don't talk to him anymore. His friendship could never be worth losing yours over. I wish I would have handled that last conversation differently. I wish you were still my best friend. -L
>>16667171 wrote this in /soc/ but ill put in here just in case
N sick and tired of playing these stupid games. message me on facebook if you want, or don't, my life will go on just fine either way. id like to see you but i really dont feel like doing this anymore. B
They say first love is like no other love Maybe that's why I can't seem to forget you Even though you're fucking toxic I need to get you of my life or else i'll be hearing forever about the girls you're screwing
this is so cliche, but I feel free, relieved. I'm not scared of doing the wrong thing or moving in some way you dislike. at ease, my muscles don't tense. not waiting for you. I wasn't seeking approval, just an answer but I don't need it anymore. I was always so worried I'd lose you for good I did anything I could making sure it didn't happen it's funny though, sitting here, where we once sat together, whether or not I'll see you again is the last thing on my mind. I have a smile today. and this wasn't for you it was for me.
What the fuck do you mean that was too much? You fucking asked me to....you know what this shit isn't worth my time. I'm already over this, time to go jam out to some music. I still wanna be with you, but I'm putting this behind me. I know you're going through some shit, I just hope to god that this is what it's from and that's not you showing your true self to me for the first time. I feel better.
b why did you make me like you and think you could feel the same? its been so long since ive felt special or met someone special like you. unlike anyone i know or at the very least, the most honest. you have no idea how much that means to me no matter how impractical, i would have tried.
you've fucked over my life every single time never a fucking chance not even with the people I trust is there a fucking line of shit bags and dick queers who want to fist and lick the fucking tears of a twelve year old.
Well now I'm old and it's humility and the stretch isn't so far and you're long dead but you're not right now so you're scar from 2 wounds that won't heal so let's end this tonight.
Holy fuck that's actually pathetic you never grew up holy fuck oh my god oh my god
.....idk what went wrong....I can't find a point where things got to the point where they just wouldn't work anymore. Ever since you moved in down the street I couldn't get you off my mind. Growing up, there was always something about you that drew me to you. I wish so badly that I could go back to that point, and force myself to walk down the street and Talk to you as a kid. I wish I could have grown up as your friend, and gotten to know you before you started feeling hurt, and closed up. Even now, all I can see when I look at you is this hidden side you only ever showed me once in a while. The side of you that lit up when you genuinely laughed. When you got excited about a project. Or the side I saw just once, when we sat crying, wondering how Wed gotten so fucked up. I miss you.....a lot. I miss you and I know there's no going back. I know we were so different, and a lot of times things were bad, but I miss all the moments that weren't....I miss the bad times that made me a better person. I miss trying with you. I gave up ....and I feel weak for it. Everyone tells me I was strong, but it doesn't feel like it. You broke me down so much, and I only ever remember that when I see you now, and you stare at me with that dead look in your eyes. Idk how to move on. I can sit here and genuinely be happy for you, and happy you found someone so good and perfect for you, yet I can't forgive myself. I don't fuckin get it. I'm happy with my life, and yet I keep feeling like there's this huge chuck with no closure. So here I am, saying all the things I can't say to you.....wishing you could read it, and say you miss me sometimes too, even if we won't and shouldn't be together again. I wish you'd day you forgive me, and that you're sorry too, because I forgive you, .for all of it even the worst parts. I love you J, .....I love you a lot, and I will never ever regret what we had.
My son, All I want for you is for you to be kinder and happier than I am. You'll make mistakes, you'll have regrets, you'll get hurt and you'll hurt others. But it's okay. Learn from your mistakes, nurse your wounds, and don't be afraid to be wrong or apologize.
Don't be a bitter, aggressive shit like I am. You deserve better.
My mum, If I wanted your advice I'd visit the seven eleven and ask for the powerball numbers. You're a broken fuck up, not everyone is as retarded as you and that's cool. But it's okay. I don't have to be like you, I'll have fun, and whatever.
I don't love you I am fooling myself into liking you because I am lonely and desperate. You are pretty smart I know you can see right through me. I don't deserve a partner desu. Yeah sure I have recovered from self-harm, stopped smoking, trying to not be a hermit anymore and will be going under the knife to live a better life but I don't deserve anyone. Every time I date someone I always fuck the relationship up. I hate myself so much and can never properly love anyone especially you. Man fuck you I hate you.
You're a cunt. A manipulative and abusive cunt. But you know this already.
I enjoy having the power to revoke your season ticket to West Ham for next season because your tears will be fucking delicious if it happens. You know this too.
I can't wait to move out and leave you behind. No more you being a whiny dickhead, no more you threatening to kill yourself or saying you wish you weren't born. That shit gets fucking boring after 6 of your 13 years on this dammed Earth, but you knew that already.
Fuck you, and fuck handegg beside that shit ain't football.
I'm fucking tired of it. All of it. I'm tired of you not listening to me or even fucking thinking about what I've been through. I went through eight fucking years of military lifestyle and I do not want to deal with anymore retarded shit. I do not care if you want to still keep your guy friends or go out still I will just fucking continue on then without your stupid fucking ass. Don't be fucking pissed off at me when I'm doing just great without you. Seriously go fuck yourself for trying to ruin my reputation with your bullshit lies about me hurting you. Everyone knows you're a fucking lying crazy stupid little cunt. For the record we were never together because I was always with Kelly because I knew you were texting guys behind my back when I fucking told you to quit it even though you insisted that we dated.. At least she knows how to be a woman you fucking waste of sperm.
There are times in life when being right is nice, and there are times when you want to be proven wrong. This whole thing is one where having been proven wrong would have made me happy and I'd have felt like less of an idiot.
I mean, either way, I'm an idiot. I wonder if what you told me about him was true, though. You told me time and time again, and even other people, how he abused you and would lose his temper with you, that when he got mad you just wanted to kill yourself. You said how you didn't want to move away from him because he was your only real life friend, despite how he'd supposedly treat you. But the entire time we were together you were just using me for the affection he stopped giving you. I ended it because of how you were with him, both for your sake so you could just go be with him instead of supposedly being tied to someone else, but also because being an inferior option to him was just really fucking awful. You didn't care about the breakup, you just cared that I stopped giving the affection as a result and you cut contact with me. You even went back to focusing on him entirely. I knew the mistake I was making when I said "yes" and I wanted to be wrong. The only thing I don't understand about you is how you changed even your sleep schedule to suit mine. The only answer I have to that one is that you really didn't want to spend hours not receiving attention. It isn't as a result of loving me, though, just that you loved affection. If it was about me then what's happened since wouldn't have gone the way it has.
I maintain that I was right with my initial suspicion, and that I was also right to end it for both our sakes. I'm still not interested in looking elsewhere for "love" and I'm not the kind of person interested in ever rebounding. I hope you smile on, at least. Whether what you said about him was true or not, it is true that he can make you happy whenever he chooses to. I also hope you do treat yourself like I told you to. You deserve it.
You used to be my hero. Growing up I wanted to be just like you. Even though I havent lived at home in years it was nice seeing you when i came home to visit. Not anymore. When you discovered Facebook a few years ago and your old high school friends I didnt say anything. When I heard that you decided your old high school friends from 40 years ago were more important than your own family and kids, it bothered me. When you started keeping secrets from Mom about who you were calling, I became angry. When you struck my mom for asking who you keep having secret conversations with, I lost any sympathy and respect I had for you. Frankly, I'm glad you live alone now. I'm 6 hours away and I have no intention of seeing you again. I hope it bothers you that your four siblings no long wish to speak to you or that your wife is now forced to fend for herself with her aging mother. If you really think your buddies from school are more worth your time than your kids, then be it. I won't be seeing you again.
I am going to keep sending you texts and emails like an insane person because I just can't stop myself. I realise that this kills any chance of romance dead, but I don't give a fuck. So long as I don't creep you out so much that we can't be friends any longer than it's all good. My wife wouldn't like it if I were courting you gently, so that has to be for the best.
I am obscenely excited about tomorrow. It's been days since I've seen you! My heart is pounding. I can't wait to meet you again. I hope we get to spend a decent amount of time together, I have so much I want to tell you.
Yours with affection and mild arousal, Your most dedicated orbiter.
>>16678161 P.S. I was in a long meeting today where I was supposed to be paying attention to important stuff. I kept thinking about you and losing my concentration, over and over again. I don't think there's space for anything in my brain anymore, because you fill me up from the inside out. I would cheerfully be your slave.
Hey mom. I am glad you and dad divorced each other, you were right to wait such a long time even it I kept asking at only 6 years old when you were going to. I am sorry I tried killing myself two years ago. I would have actually done it last month but I've heard you crying over the divorce and I know it'd push you over. Your so proud of how far I've come yet I still break down quietly almost once a month and sob in the shower hoping someone would murder me. I've made lots of new friends at school but I don't really feel close to them except for one really sweet senior who is leaving this year. I had class with her (performing arts class) she's super awesome and she's kinda like me. We've been talking for awhile now and I really want to ask her out but I couldn't do that too somebody especially knowing I am still broken inside from my past. As I sit here with a knife in hand thinking about how sharp it is I know I'll never do it but maybe when I finish high-school I'll join the military and die for a reason. I feel lost in life, It was nice talking though mom. I never wanted to be a burden to you but I feel like I am making it worse sometimes. I'll leave the rest for another letter I love you mom. -kj
da haben wir über ein paar Monate ganz schön aneinander vorbei geredet, denke ich. Schon letzten Sommer hätte ich offen zu Dir sein müssen, aber ich hatte damals wie heute einfach zu viel Angst vor Deiner Ablehnung. Dass wenn ich Dir sage, dass ich Dich eigentlich mag, der richtige Moment dazu schon längst verpasst ist und Du mir ins Gesicht sagst, dass ich ein Idiot bin. Wer traut sich denn schon einfach so sein Herz nach langer Zeit zu öffnen?
So gerne würde ich Dich wieder lachen hören wollen und beim Sprechen die Blicke spüren. Ich bin so unsicher, ob es Dir besser geht, wenn wir uns näher kommen und ob Du das überhaupt willst.
Vielleicht ist es gut so, wie es jetzt ist und beide gehen ihre Wege.
Aber dann will ich Dir trotzdem gesagt haben, dass Du mir etwas bedeutest und ich mich immer freue Dich zu sehen. Ich hoffe Du bewahrst weiter so viel Gutes in Dir und ich wünsche Dir nur das Beste, Maria. Ich werd Dich sicher nicht vergessen. Mich noch lange an Dich erinnern.
this might surprise you, but the reason for all this mess going on right now is you.
When we first met and you looked me in the eyes, I had the weird feeling that there is something between us, although I'm actually too rational to believe in something called "love at first sight". And I had the strange certain impression that you had the same feeling.
At the beginning, we just played with each other and everything was cool. After a while, I realized that I felt more attracted to you than I should feel while being with someone else. Don't get me wrong, you are not the reason for the failure of my relationship, things were already pretty bad before.
I know I have been acting really strangely the last weeks. The reason is that I did not know and still don't know how to handle the situation. I don't know how you feel about me, but I've fallen for you. The problem is: my heart wants it, but my head cannot find a single way how it could work. That is why I had to act the whole time. But I am a terrible actor and you must be wondering what is going on. Having to wear a mask and not showing my true intentions hurts, so I want to let you know: I would love to kiss you, I would love to warm you when you are freezing, I would love to carry you to bed and make it with you and I would love to cuddle with you afterwards. I would love to be a part of your life.
But I will never be.
I don't even expect a particular response because, even if you felt the same way, it wouldn't change a thing because we are not allowed to be together. It is just absurd how every little thing worked and works against us. But I wanted to let you know.
We will have to see each other for a few weeks, then you will be gone forever. And you will leave not knowing who I really am because all I could do in this situation was to pretend. You came into my life only for a very short while, but left a wound that will stay for a longer while. How can I forget you?
Sorry for being such a pathetic person. I didnt want the things to end up like that. Im sorry for not writing to you when I had a chance. You 've stopped me from taking these meds that were ruining my life. Thank you for making me realize that they were only hurting me, even though they were supposed to help me. You got me out of my depression and the sole reason Im here today is because of You. You dont even realize that how much you are worth to me. You have changed my perspective, my entire life. Thank you for being there for me when i needed someone. I love you E, yet i still managed to fuck up everything. I hate myself for not getting the hints. I hate myself for making every talk between us seem awkward. I just never really talked to anyone in my life. I hate myself for being the reason we are not talking anymore. I just dont know how to talk to anyone. You dont even need to have any feelings for me. Im not worthy of you. Im trash. I just want someone to talk to. I miss you.
Sometimes I wonder if I would be different if you had been in my life. Sometimes I wonder if I wouldn't have turned out so fucked up, or if this is just the way I am. I try not to use you as an excuse, and I do the best I can, but I've made some colossal fuckups this past year and a bit.
There's an old song here that says "it would be nice if 'life' meant living without you, but I can't live a single day without you anymore."
Funny how I got used to see you randomly without realizing how true this song is for me when thinking about you. Months passed away... maybe I wasn't ready to feel, maybe it was just about not creating you trouble (both of us know why), maybe I was in self-denial. Maybe the being who randomly popped up in your classes was just an empty shell pretending to be me.
And yet, now - too near and too far from you - the song makes me perfect sense. I can't wake up without remembering your storm-coloured eyes, I can't sleep without your sunny smile creeping into my dreams.
I want to know you better. And I want to let you know me better, not the empty shell who randomly popped up in your classes claiming to be me, but the real me.
So hopefully, I can tell you that I want you. Not as some "half", but as you complete and whole. To let me be the roots for your wings, little girl who travels trying to find some blue flower.
I know this is probably hard to understand, but to me, the mental hospital was the most horrifying thing imaginable. Hell, even I can't explain why, but being in a strange place, around strange people...something about that terrifies me. Then there's the chance I'll never get out, that's what terrifies me the most.
I know there's no way for me to get out of going to the hospital if I get sicker, besides killing myself, and I can't kill myself without hurting you, and I love you more than anything.
If it gets to the point where I have to go, I'll go. For you.
E, I can't stop fucking thinking about you and it's driving me insane. I hate you, I hate what you've done. but I still care, and it's too painful. I want to completely forget you. you fucked me up. I've never been so damaged by a single person. not even my mother. I do everything to stay positive and pretend you don't cross my mind, but I'm worrying about you and I don't fucking know why. you never will worry about me. you'll pretend to, but you never will. I want to text you, ask about your day or something. but that's just like me, always so caught up in the past. fuck you. M
hi E. tomorrow is my birthday, i know you remember this. or maybe you dont since you left me back there to die, while having the time of your life i learned what it is like to be in your position this year all it did was make me scared of what you were capable of i feel sorry for her i feel sorry for myself i hope you quit doing drugs with him.
please do not write me anything for my birthday. but dont forget it, ok?
Abby, I need to say something... extremely important. I mean, so important that it's probably best to read this when you have time... it's quite long. Anyways; my biggest regret in all of this is that there's no opportunity to tell you in person. What I'm about to tell you is probably the single most important thing I'll have ever told you in my life and probably the most embarrassing. You've been extremely close to me in these last nearly five years now and I can't ever repay you for how much I really appreciate that.
Abigail, for the last five years you've been one of my closest friends, you've given me support and kindness even though I've never deserved any of it. You have no idea how greatful I am and always will be to have such an amazing person like you as a friend. For nearly five years you've been making me feel things, amazing things that I've had to hold back for the sake of preserving our friendship; but I'm done running away from how I feel because I know it's never going to change. I once heard that the feeling of being in love puts a... spark in someone's eyes, and even since I saw you again my world has never felt so bright. Since I stopped being ashamed of what I've felt I can't stop smiling, it's as though my life of melancholy has been reduced to nothing with just your presence alone. Abigail Vera Drew, I am in love with you and I have been since I met you. I know a girl like you would never want anything to do with someone like me, but you'd make me the happiest man alive if you'd be mine. I know this is a lot of information to take in at once, I understand that. So unless you have your definite answer already then I more than recommend thinking it over and being sure you know you've made the best decision you could've. Thank you for your time and just know that whatever you decide I completely support and I'm ready to keep my head held high.
Sorry for lying S. The truth is I fell out of love with your ugly ass a long time ago. You've aged prematurely and you have too many health issues. When I look at you all i see is your mother. I wasted everyone's time and put on a show to justify my behavior. I moved on a year ago. Good luck with A. You 2 truly are best together. As for me, I'm looking for someone real. Not a fake ass lying bitch like you. C ya.
You know there are times I wish we still talked, or the better yet we're still together. I guess what I am trying to say is since you left me I have made some questionable desicions. The more I write this the less I doubt you would understand my internal conflicts and yet I wouldn't be here had it been for you. Talk about the irony.
E I know you'll probably try to waltz back into my life soon. It was always this time of year when you were feeling pathetic and lonely. I'm not in the mood. I'll fucking ruin you if you talk to me again. Stay out of my life.
TO ALL HUMANS. IF YOU ARE STILL BREATHING. THIS IS FOR YOU
AN OVER ABUNDANCE OF IGNORANCE
THIS ISN'T ABOUT THE 1 PERCENTERS, SANDPEOPLE, INTERNATIONAL BANKERS OR WHOEVER YOU DECIDED PUT THE BLAME ON TODAY YOU ARE THE FUCKING CANCER THAT SUPPORTS ALL THIS HORRENDOUS SHIT GOING ON
YOUR IGNORANCE FUELS THE WAR MACHINE YOUR IGNORANCE SUPPORTS THE RELIGOUS PEDOFILES YOUR IGNORANCE FORTIFIES THE CROWN YOUR IGNORANCE WILL BRING THE DEATH OF EVERYTHING THAT IS GOOD
JUSTIFYING YOUR TOXIC EXISTENCE WITH YOUR WORTHLESS SPAWN WORTHLESS PARENTS MAKE WORTHLESS SPAWN EVERY WORTHLESS PARENT LIES TO THEIR CHILD EVERY WORTHLESS PARENT LIES TO THEIR CHILD EVERY WORTHLESS PARENT LIES TO THEIR CHILD EVERY WORTHLESS PARENT LIES TO THEIR CHILD
SPACESHIP EARTH IS HEADING FOR THE SHIT PIT
WORD IS IN THE WIND FOR ETERNAL SIN ARBITRARY LEADERS ARE ABOUT TO TELL OUR BROTHERS TO DROP THE BOMB ON ALL THE USELESS EATERS MASS EXECUTION FOR PRISON PLANET
WAKE THAT DORMANT BRAIN I WANT TO SEE 7 BILLION HEROES DIRECT YOUR ENERGY TOWARDS FREEDOM TODAY THE BARE ESSENTIALS HUMANS NEED ARE FOOD, WATER AND SHELTER (WE'VE ALWAYS HAD THE TOOLS TO CREATE ABUNDANCE FOR ALL) WE HAD THE TOOLS TO CREATE RADICAL ABUNDANCE FOR ALL OVER A CENTURY AGO CAN YOU COMPREHEND? WE HAD THE TECHNOLOGY OVER A CENTURY AGO WE HAD THE TOOLS TO CREATE RADICAL ABUNDANCE FOR ALL OVER A CENTURY AGO DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHERE TECHNOLOGY IS AT RIGHT NOW? HOW IGNORANT CAN YOU BE WAKE THAT FUCKING DORMANT BRAIN
There is only one person I truly miss enough that I'd do whatever they wanted to re-establish a connection, and they've known me for less than half a year. He is also the only person with whom I have no contact and would welcome contact with again. Everyone else that I want something to do with is already able to contact me directly, some in multiple ways. He's the only person in this world, however, who has access to one other means of contact that only my second-oldest sister has.
Not that this is saying much. After all, I'm just me, and this "me" is a proven idiot. Still, I do my own thing now that he's off doing his, he's probably fully replaced me already and if he's happy then that's fine. But, skippy, make no mistake. It's him that I'd focus on and his life I wish to walk back into, but also his life that I won't disturb.
My wishes for "someone" to smile? My wishes for "someone" to act in their own interests? My wishes for "someone" to hold onto their optimism? They're all for him. It won't be me that he says he loves, but I look forward to the day he says he's truly in love and content.
Oh, but make no mistake. I am just me, and this "me" is an idiot. But this "me" who was so hesitant to say that he loved this person, truly loves M, and M is an adorable kitten in personality
I'm sorry little bro. I'm sorry I have to watch a profoundly sick society corrupt your heart and mind. You're so young and I can already see the pain, anxiety and stress your surrounding's have put you in. Every attempt at freeing you only ends with backlash at me from everyone that is supposed to love you. I would hope for a better world, but i don't believe in hope. instead I will work to change myself and in turn our surroundings. I truly imagine a greater place for you, for myself, and the future generations of being. i love you with all my heart
Dear, I wish I could go back in time and say no when you begged for me back. I'm not really sure if it's because I regretted dating you once more or because it led to us being in this position. I wish I could've been strong and said no to you, and moved on to someone who cares about me like my new person does. Maybe if I had let you off easy then, you wouldn't be trying to sabotage me now. I really wonder why you're so hellbent on hurting me and ruining my relationship. You've moved on and so have I, I just don't understand why you want to take this away from me. Alternatively, maybe sometimes all these shitty things happen to make way for lovely new things. Meeting this new person was possibly one of the best things to happen to me, it's so weird to feel genuinely loved and appreciated and adored by my partner. Maybe moving on isn't so bad.
I had a freak out about becoming an adult a month before I turned 18, and I see now, as an adult, that I was right to. College sucks sometimes, relationships are hard, taking care of your life is hard, drinking and smoking is so nice but so expensive and bad for you, and life can be so sad and so happy at the same time, it's confusing as hell.
>>16667171 Hey dad, Everything you do makes me fucking sick. I hate the way you've treated the family and especially my little brother. You tried to stop me traveling, you mentally abused my little brother and fucked everyone around you with your mind games. I hope you're fucking happy with your dried up old hag of a girlfriend and with the thought that I personally don't consider you to be my father anymore. You forfeited that right when you fucked off to England and stopped influencing my life. I hope your realise that you're going to end up old and alone.
I love you dad. But fuck me you make it hard to do that.
>>16680813 Actually you know what, I'm leaving this site, I'm so done with this, I hate being here anyhow. If you truly want to see me you know what you have to do. I would never be mean or not respond to a message. Good luck arguing and sending messages to anons who aren't me.
I wasn't your best friend, but you were mine. I haven't quit smoking quite yet. Every night, just before I go to sleep I have a cig on the balcony like we used to. That's when it's the hardest that you're gone, but it helps me remember the good times. Kiddo's doing fine, he even sat on my lap the other day. He's allowed to go into my room now, and loves every minute of it. I've reconnected the playstation but it's still too soon to play. Oh yeah, I went to see the new Star-Wars. I think you would have liked it. I miss you buddy. I miss you so fucking much.
i get it, you don't need us and we don't need you. I just have mental issues that can't be resolved. You'll never get it, you were supposed to save yourself and save us. Instead you just ditched us. It hurts, not knowing what I did wrong. I know I talked horribly about you but it's because I thought you could use it. I don't even know why, even if you're kind and honestly a good person I just can't help but focus on your fuckups. You can't just walk away say sorry, apologize and move on.. that's not how it works. I'm hurt and I need you to realize that without us you might as well be dead.
I don't know if you care, you probably don't and that's why I gossip and that's why I'm here. You never valued me as a friend well this is how I cope with it. Just understand what I am and I have issues like you. It's why I keep asking about you so I can see if I matter in your life. I don't know where I'm heading but I'm spontaneously living in this moment. Right now me and the boys and focused on you and it sucks that you rejected me for some girl. It hurts and I just want everything to be just like it was before. I can't help my anger sorry bro.
Anything hurtful I do is just because I want to matter. I don't want to exist alone, I can't do it alone and maybe it's why I hate you. Why do you not care? If you improve yourself and become what I fear you could then I might just be depressed for everything I've done.
I'll send her this eventually. Not now, though. ____________
I like you.
You're an interesting, intelligent and insightful girl. In other circumstances, I'd tell you straight to the face. And I'd tell you "some" months ago, but you know why I didn't - I needed to keep discretion, otherwise it would create an uncalled for messy situation. [And also because I didn't bother even to love myself at those times - let alone have feelings for another person.]
Yes, I've been keeping this to myself for quite a long time. And I still can't believe I'm telling you this by Facebook and in English (I'm aware my [her-language] is too crappy to tell you using it, as well your [my-language].
That is why - as soon the classes ended - I tried to keep contact with you. I phoned you, I looked for your contact in FB [and I found it through a common friend].
I like you enough to want to know you better, and I've been liking you for quite some time. And because the guy who rarely popped up in your classes was an empty shell who didn't even love himself, let alone love a girl.
So, sorry for being blunt here, but.
If you are interested, will you have a lunch with me, where we can talk together? Or will you say "I'm busy, sorry" yet again?
>>16681669 At the moment, I'm with my heart aching because of a thousand things. I simply don't know how to approach you. I fear being dumped yet again by yet another foreign like it happened once in my past (and before you ask, no, I don't have a fetish for non-[insert country]). I don't have a fucking clue if I'm the kind of guy you're into.
But sometimes, a person must dare if the person wants to be happy.
If you are NOT interested, please, say a "no". Even these two letters would be enough, as long as you're being sincere. Regardless of your answer, I will NOT bother you in your work, I'll just pretend to see you as yet another professor. Just like I did.
However, if there is the slight chance we might have something together, please let me show you who I am.
(If you lurk here you might recognize yourself.. Also I'm planning on sending this to you, if I had a way of contacting you)
Right. So.. I have to do this. I'm most likely embarrasing myself and I seem weirdly clingy or something but I don't care because I still have so much to say to you and to ask you. I should just let go and forget but somehow you affected me so bad I can't seem to just give up and forget about you. I could if you just told me everything, if you just told everything you know you should, the truth and everything I deserve to know. Were you actually just playing with me and lying about everything? I refuse to believe that at all of it was all bullshit. I know some things had to be true. Otherwise you're just a crazy and sick human being.
You convinced me I should trust you and you pretended to "love" me so much and told me all sorts of amazing things. You seemed like I was everything to you. You told me I was everything to you, you told me I was "the love of your life". Hah what shit. You made me think I loved you. Now that I think about it, I didn't. I thought I did but it couldn't have been actual love. I just liked you and I was too horny and you manipulated me into thinking it was love. How could it have been love, I was an idiot. We didn't even talk for that long and we never actually met. But all the times we skyped for hours and hours, you fucking sang for me, what the fuck was that, you wrote a poem?? Or did you? That was probably fake. You spent so much of your time talking to me, being so "real" with me, all that couldn't have been all fake. If it was you're the worst person ever. Really. And a fantastic and dedicated liar. (1/2)
>>16682168 I believed we could've been something, I really did. This is why I hate feelings and I always just hide everything and never get attatched to anyone, it avoids me getting hurt. I was way too nice and submissive to everything, you just played me and I let you. I didn't truly love you but I really cared about you, I cared about you so much, I really liked you and I wanted us to be together. I would've been willing to do so much for you, I would've been willing to some day possibly move to you for fucks sake. You broke my heart in a way.
Why did you have to do everything you did, why did things change? (if they ever were true) You have got to tell me the truth, just man up you idiot and contact me one more time and explain why you're a massive dickhead. You were fucking crazy, why did I get myself into this.. I'm making a fool of myself. I made a fool of myself with so many texts I ever sent, especially after we broke up.
I have a terrible feeling in my gut, in a way I always did, it never felt completely right.. I can't let everything go, I can't forget before I talk to you one last time. I have to know what was true and what was lies, what was I to you, what was it all, and what happened. I need the truth, all of it. It's the only way I'll stop thinking about you. You said you didn't find anyone else but I don't believe you. There is someone else isn't there? If so, you should've just told me. I wouldn't have to suffer with this vague bullshit and not knowing anything. I hate being confused and not knowing the reason why to everything. When I get attached, when I want something I can't let go easily, I have to know everything before I can let go. Please talk to me.
I kinda hate you in a way actually. You're awful, even if it was true you're still awful and mean. (2/2)
Way to go sociopaths, glad we found out what type of influence you are to everyone around you. Offline and offline not only are you proven psychopaths with narcissistic personality disorder but you're sociopaths as well. You might not subscribe to karma but the trouble and lies you have done to everyone is just a reflection of what a shitty person you are being. Not saying you are this bad person or you are a menace that will never change but as of now you need psychiatric help.
Woman I should have just come to find you, but I didn't want to look like what I am: desperate. Desperate for you. I will regret that for a long time. Next time, if there is a next time, don't say "I might need you later" - just tell me that you need me and I'll be at your side.
>>16682184 I sang to you a lot during our short, but wonderfull relationship. Everything I said, everything I did, was because I actually legitimately love you. I remember the first day we met, we spent hours on skype telling each other about our lives. I want to believe that what we had was real, because it felt like nothing else. I was being genuine with you, and you seemed like you were as well.
I don't want this at all especially with the trouble you have caused. Be good to your sibling and be happy with your life. I'm alright and I'm gone from this country by next year for work. Not everything is peachy in my life but I have to work hard and I know that. I'm sure you have no time for this and I do not as well. I'll be with her, or find her I hope you find your love as well.
I just want you to know that I forgive you. We were both so young and inexperienced and we didn't really know what we were doing. I know I fell in love with you because I had forgiven you everytime you fucked it up. We've been together for two years and you've been a piece of shit, but now I can forgive you. Do you know why? Because if I don't, I won't get over it, and I NEED to get over you, because you're an asshole who doesn't deserve my time, words, even thoughts. So, if I forgive you, you'll be meaningless! You're just my ex. There's NOTHING between us now. However, thank you for those few things you did for me, thanks for listening to me when I needed to talk. Thanks for showing me how a person is not supposed to act. I won't repeat the same mistake.
>>16667171 Dear E, I really don't approve of your relationship with C because I'm still in love with you. When you told me that you want to take it further with C I secretly felt really sad and I'm still so hung up over it. Please just break up with her already and come back to me. We can have what we used to have, I'm so much better now, you've said it yourself. You say I'm pretty, funny, and you obviously want to be around me, but somehow C is your pick. What's so good about C anyway? She's okay, but she's not really that attractive and she's so inexperienced and indecisive and is such an attention whore sometimes. The dynamic of the three of us being friends is so weird and makes me feel so uncomfortable, and to be honest, from the start I've wanted C gone and for you to be my girlfriend. I'm tired of being the third wheel.
All I want is to be your girlfriend. I'm sorry I keep playing my attraction off as nothing, and every time we have a "get stuff off your chest" conversation, I don't tell you the truth. But now I am, I guess.
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