Is it normal to completely cut contact with guys you were once close to and pretend they don't even exist? I'm pretty inexperienced so I don't know how it is but I'm wondering if this is what people do. I mean don't most people remain friends or even friendly?
if you've lost the thing that keeps you and your friends in touch then i dont think that friendship will last.
you dont cut all contact with them but you lose consistency and the relationship basically falls out. time to look for new friends OP.
I meant more like in the romantic context. Is it normal to pretend the person never existed if you were so close once? I guess I'm wondering if I should work through the hurt feelings or whatever else instead of just plugging my ears and walking away. I've done it two times with guys who hurt me with their uncaring nature. Basically they led me on in a relationship, knowing that it was hard for me to let people in, and then wanted to be "friends" when they got tired of it.
I guess I'm wondering if the reason why I keep running into guys like this is because I never deal with the feelings and just block them and it all out. Or if I'm just being too sensitive.
I guess because I'm sheltered and naive and want to believe there's some good in them. But I probably need to realize there's real assholes out there and I was just stupid to believe the illusion. It's just hard to let go of people you believed in and shared so much with.
The first one actually did pull me back once and hurt me even more. I thought the second one was a good person so I keep thinking "oh I shouldn't completely break all contact again, we did have good times", but it's probably my inexperience talking. I will have good and better times with people who actually care.
I do this all the time. It's mostly on accident, though. And I never try to reconnect out of fear that they might hate me for having ignored them. Especially if they expressed romantic interest in me and I didn't feel the same. It's sad because I've lost great friends this way.
I believe that friendship is the core of a good relationship. In my' experience, the break ups happened because we didn't get along very well. You're most likely going to have the same dynamic with someone regardless of relationship status.
Burn all bridges, cut contact, remove them from our life as much as possible, you'll get over them faster and make your life simpler in the long run.
There's always exceptions of the rule but this isn't your case.
There are various reasons why someone would completely cut contact. I wouldn't say it's normal, just that cases can be made to do it. There are unreasonable cases, there are reasonable ones. I'll give my perspective as someone who did cut contact, and then my perspective as someone who had another cut contact with me very recently.
I cut contact with someone I was incredibly fond of, because he continuously sought to provoke any reaction he could just for a bit of attention, rather than just outright asking. He'd do things on the grounds of making others jealous. What actually pushed me to cut contact, however, was a combination of his outbursts in July, and him lashing out at someone he didn't even know just because he felt like it. So I bid him a farewell and cut all contact. Following that, he proceeded to spend all his time fawning over a girl, then more recently wanted to talk to me again then found someone that makes him happy. At least, for him he had a nice happy outcome to his year and he's gone into 2016 with someone he cares about. I would still argue that me cutting contact over the events were reasonable, no matter how fond of him I was for well over a year.
As for the other case, my recent ex cut off all contact with me after I said we should break up and that he should look closer to him because I was sure someone else could make him happier. Granted, he was also a very depressed guy, but he cut off contact shortly after the breakup even though I would have loved to have stayed in contact with him. Stupid, really, because I'm in love with the dork but right now he's off hopefully enjoying himself
either they got what they wanted from you and no longer need you
or 2. the thought of you pains them and they cant be around you without being sad
3. they realized youre a shitty person with no redeeming qualities and dont want to waste more time on you
theres probably other options but those are the 3 ive experienced
Yes its better that way.
>tfw had dated a girl who was full whore mode.
>tries to get friendly with me
>i know shes a literal cuck while also cheating on her bfs with 5 people
And thats how i realized relationships are fucked.