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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

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Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.

Avoid asking these common questions:

>Is it normal for me to go to a club/bar by myself?
Yes. Stop overthinking this.

>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practicing and exposing yourself to it.

>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.

>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing

>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.

>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>

>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking

>Brandon or Female Brandon
Piss off.

>Frog
Also piss off.
>>
Is having a panty sniffing fetish weird for a girl to learn about, or is it so basic you wouldn't care?
>>
>>16644241

How is enjoying the smell of your partner a fetish?
>>
>>16644241
I'd be really into it, but I have no idea how common that is.
>>
Is it appropriate to tell an ex you still have feelings for them? What if they are already in a relationship?
>>
What does he mean when he says "that was intense" after sex? Is that a good thing?

>>16644290
But why would you? I think it's best just to move on.
>>
Had a thing with this girl, but she goes cold on me, stops texting back, yada yada. Sucks but I move on, simple enough right?

But whenever I saw her through mutual friends later on, she was always angry at me for god knows why. I'm legitimately confused and I'd appreciate any input as to what's going on with her.
>>
>>16644241
Wouldn't bother me at all but I'm very open-minded and most fetishes wouldn't bother me at all

>>16644290
She's your ex for a reason, leave her alone, especially if she's happy with her new partner and you care about her at all

>>16644367
No idea, I'd suggest asking her directly and politely instead of asking people on an anonymous internet board
>>
>>16644241
Pretty damn basic, but no, you may not have a pair of my panties.

>>16644290
You're an asshole.

>>16644367
She's mad that you didn't "try harder" for her.
>>
>>16644397
>I'd suggest asking her directly
Already have, she just avoids the question or says nothing is wrong.

>>16644424
>She's mad that you didn't "try harder" for her.
Extremely annoying if so, because I was pretty damn keen on her at the time.
>>
>>16644450
You didn't miss out on much. Girls that play games aren't worth it.
>>
A female has mostly guy friends, yet she is a virgin. What do you guys make of this?
>>
I had tentative plans to meet a girl after work later in the week. Tentative because the culture in this country is always working late, so meeting time is variable. That's totally legit.

Now she's caught a cold. Do you think that's legit? The culture in this country is also that you work even when sick...
>>
>>16644488
She doesn't fuck her friends willy-nilly, which is a smart call.
>>
>>16644232
>bf likes to brag about his knowledge of cars and car repair
>actually doesn't know much about cars
>shifts his automatic car at the wrong times
>like shifts to 3 going downhill or on flat land
>says he knows how to drive manual, but always stalls the car

I think he's just doing it to feel like he can manly brag to me. Any time I disagree with him (just jokingly, who gives a real shit anyways), he gets defensive.

Men, do I just let him brag/lie about it? It's kinda trivial, but annoying because if he talks like that to other people than me, he'll probably look like an idiot. What do?
>>
You liked me in highschool too, didn't you? Guys have that thing called instict too.
>>
Is working in a hentai company that big of a turn off?
>>
>>16644307
bumping this question

>>16644556
not really
>>
>>16644307
He means it was intense. Sounds positive. It left an impression.
>>
Women, what is the easiest way for me to lose my virginity? I actually really like "unconventional" beauty in girls, some girls that others would rate 2/10 or similar are my perfect 10/10s. Does that mean I'd have a chance with those because most men are not interested? Or should I just go literally anyone and see what happens?
>>
Does a woman know if you're interested in her, or are they as oblivious as men?
>>
>>16644776
Ask someone you like. If you literally don't care hire someone, it's easier.
>>
>>16644905
I believe they are as oblivious, generally. But I also worry I'm far too obvious so what the hell do I know.

I think it's dangerous to think they know, though. It puts the blame on them. That's why the Friendzone is a thing. You can put the blame on her for YOU not making a movie, because "she knew"
>>
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She's 5'11, I'm 6'0. Do I have a chance? I hear 6'0 is short according to women.
>>
>>16644905
It depends on how obvious you are. Girls know their "beta orbiters" are interested in her, but it's easier to pretend you don't know, really.
>>
>>16644232
women: do you get better orgasms from oral, or sex?
>>
>>16644907
>If you literally don't care hire someone, it's easier
I'd like to avoid that honestly.
>>
Do any other girls ever day dream about having a dick and fucking their boyfriend with it? Or forcing him to give you a blowjob?

I think it might be kind of a weird fantasy, I think it has to do with the power dynamic or something.
>>
Women, how would you feel if your boyfriend came out and told you about his depression?

We've been together four month. We're already on the "I love you" stage. I've battled depression for a while and it's been rough. It's a dark time in my life where I've lost interest in my career and I feel like I'm going nowhere. She doesn't know any of this and I don't know if it's too early to discuss these things.

I also want to stop working so, so bad. I own a company and make $4,000/mo but only work something like 30 hours a month. I have all this free time but I'm "on call" so I'm tied up. It feels restrictive and I want to stop.
>>
>>16644936
"Penisneid", Freud.
>>
>>16644936
Do you know pegging?
That's totally a thing. Google it.

I'd approach the idea with him delicately, though.
>>
>>16644942
If she says she loves you and you doove her, absolutely tell her. Everything.
>>
I love my fiancee but she has some strange fetishes. Her latest "thing" is she wants me to piss inside her pussy after sex. This just seems way out there and it's making me doubt our relationship. I proposed on Christmas and we're still in the wedding prep flutter, but I'm having second thoughts because it just seems so weird.
>>
>>16644954
That is kinda weird, but I mean...has anything else changed? A little piss is going to ruin this thing?

I'm not saying it shouldn't. I don't know if I could do that. But think hard about it, dude. Have you talked to her?

She's asking you to do this stuff because she trusts you. She's probably never told anyone that kinda thing before.
>>
>>16644241
I know of it's existence and I'm okay with it. I think it'd be the same for most girls

>>16644290
Of course not.

>>16644307
He means that the sex was intense. Men are not complex creatures.

>>16644367
Probably felt like you should have put in more of an effort

>>16644518
I don't know, I don't live where you live and I'm not familiar with your culture, so it's hard to get inside her head

>>16644552
There's no real way you can talk to him about this without emasculating him. Just leave it. Also why would he shift gears on an automatic?

>>16644776
Easiest? Hire a hooker. Otherwise, try and get with any and every girl indiscriminately

>>16644905
Can be either

>>16644918
Nah, she's going to want a guy who's at least 6'8"

>>16644936
Never thought about it

>>16644942
At that point, I'd probably have somewhat of an inkling, depending on how lose we are. In your situation, I think you should, your partner should support you

>>16644954
If that's the sort of thing that's causing you to think twice about marriage, don't get married. That's a pretty normal fetish. Or maybe I'm just on 4chan too much.
>>
>>16644936
Yes, but I don't care about the power aspect of it. I really just want to know how the penis feels pleasure.

>>16644942
The longer you put it off, the harder it will be on her.
>>
>>16645083
>don't know where you live/culture

That's part of my problem. I'm an American living in Japan, she's Japanese. I can't get inside her head either.
>>
>>16644954
>My fiance has some strange fetishes

Why exactly does this bother you? Is this specific fetish just too much? Is this fetish just the law straw? Are you worried she's weirder than you thought? What is it exactly that's giving you doubts?

Ask yourself those questions, ask yourself how big a deal this is to you, then have a talk with her about it.


>>16645083
> That's a pretty normal fetish. Or maybe I'm just on 4chan too much.

imo the latter, but I'm not on here too much so no idea
>>
to girls:

i'm an idle rich guy but i live in a small, one bedroom studio in disrepair (only 1/6 lightbulbs working, broken closet door, missing curtains, fridge with a broken door). would you consider this deceptive? i mean, if you were to find out how much money i have. i'm not actively pretending to be poor, i just don't like to disclose how wealthy i am (it's caused problems in the past) and don't care to live opulently.
>>
>>16645181
It's a problem if you go out of your way to hide your wealth, but you just sound lazy. Lazy is a problem, maybe not a huge one, depends. Make sure your house isn't broken before you bring a girl home, at the very least.
>>
>>16645190
i try not to bring people home because it's kind of embarrassing but it seems inevitable it will happen in the near future.

>It's a problem if you go out of your way to hide your wealth

how much of a problem?
>>
Womenfolk: What are your hobbies and interests?

Penis havers: Same question
>>
Girls,

I've never asked a girl out before but I plan to pretty much as soon as I get back to college when winter break ends. I don't really expect her to say yes since she doesn't seem to into me, but I figure I may as well give it a shot. The problem is, if she says yes, I have no idea what to do for a first date. So what have been some past first dates of yours that went well?
>>
>>16645200
Guy here. Gym, books, movies.
>>
>>16645197
Dealbreaker. What else might you be lying to the poor girl about? How does she know that you've been honest about other things? That does depend on whether you've outright lied to her and other circumstances surrounding your relationship, but you tread on dangerous ground either way.

Are you wealthy because of your job, or because of family/inheritance? That also plays into it, somewhat.
>>
>>16645197
If you actively hide it, what's the functional difference between hiding and lying?
If she asks you some question about your past (or present) and you tell her something other than the truth, that's bad.

But also, why not fix your place up if it actually embarrasses you?
>>
>>16645197
Whatever effort you put forth to hide your wealth will tell someone the amount of effort you are willing to go through to lie about anything. Yes, an explanation may suffice but you WILL lose their trust for some time. The greater effort you go through to hide it, the greater the deception, the greater the loss of trust.
>>
>>16645200
Knitting/crochet, video games, reading, geocaching, swimming, writing, baking

>>16645201
Generally something low-pressure like coffee/tea works well. Ask your friends/acquaintances if there are nice places to go around town, since we can't give specialized answers here.
>>
>>16645181
I wouldn't consider deceptive, but I wouldn't want to date you if you live in a place like that. That just shows disrespect for yourself and your surroundings

>>16645200
Reading, vidya, British comedy, fashion and makeup
>>
>>16645207
>That does depend on whether you've outright lied to her

i haven't.

>Are you wealthy because of your job, or because of family/inheritance?

the latter, my job doesn't pay much.

>>16645208
>If you actively hide it, what's the functional difference between hiding and lying?

that i'm not lying about it? it seems like an important distinction. people hide things all the time.

>why not fix your place up if it actually embarrasses you?

nearly all of the time it's good enough, it's only when others want to come that it becomes an issue. easier just to avoid bringing people here.
>>
>>16645238
>the latter, my job doesn't pay much.
Then that explains why you don't much like to spend your money. Just don't lie. And fix your goddamn house, holy shit.
>>
>>16644488
My best friend has mostly guy friends (including me) and hasn't tried to fuck any of us yet. Sometimes you just meet more people of the opposite gender.
>>16644954
I mean that's kind of a weird fetish but it doesn't seem like something that should make you question a marriage. If you don't feel comfortable doing it then tell her that and she should stop bothering you about it.
>>16645219
>generally something low-pressure
Yeah that's what I was thinking, just wondering if there's anything maybe a little out of the ordinary that impressed any girls because I do really like this girl and don't want a mediocre first date to be the end of things. Also I figure a local coffee shop maybe a bit out of the way is at least somewhat better than the Starbucks by campus right?
>>
>>16645238
If you are asked a question that would require you to reveal it, what do you do?
Just say you are uncomfortable? It's not lying but it's not a good look, either.
>>
>>16644936
Not exactly, but I do wonder what it's like to have sex as a guy. Seems better and a lot easier to orgasm. I used to think sex just wasn't supposed to feel good or comfortable, and that any moans were more from pain.
>>
Is it a turn off for me to prefer an older girl? like 3-5 years older than me. Sadly I have a bit of a mommy fetish but I would never date an actual single mom, nor am I into that degenerate adult baby shit
>>
>>16645257
>If you are asked a question that would require you to reveal it, what do you do?

i would answer the question.
>>
>>16645248
Trying to do something unique is good, but it's not like anons here know your area well. You'll have to do your own research, but you're on the right track.
>>
How to break up with a mentally unstable girl? Not that I don't love her anymore, I just changed the view I had of women since I met her. I regret getting serious with her. I also don't want to make things terrible for her.
>>
Guys, do your balls often stick to your legs? Why not wear briefs or boxer briefs if they do?
>>
>>16645270
There's no good way to break up with someone. You don't owe her anything other than telling her that you're over. Explaining things might seem nice, but doesn't typically help much. If you're scared that she may do something drastic, contact someone close to her before/after the breakup.
>>
>>16645276
they're less comfortable
>>
>>16644552
Auto tech here, just let him embarrass himself. I've met him a hundred times and his kind only ever learn from their own mistakes. Make sure you're there when he does get called out because he'll never say anything car-related to anybody who's present ever again.
>>
>>16645276
Boxer briefs are nice. They keep all my parts seperate, and are good for smuggling a burrito should be need arise.
>>
>>16644552
Dude sounds like a tool, honestly.

Tell him to get a stick if he actually wants to be a real drive.

-A trained racing driver with a competition license and a career in Motorsports marketing.

>>16644918
It's fine. Personality is everything, don't listen to /r9k/ and their "waaaah I'm a manlet nobody will ever love me" rhetoric.

>>16644954
This is pretty weird bro, I think she's just horny and coming up with weird shit though. It's kind of impossible to do unless you're one of the minority who can piss with a boner, but yeah.

I ain't into pissin' on girls but maybe she is and maybe you are, I guess it's worth a shot to see if she's down for that.

>>16645138
I probably couldn't get mine inside her!

Haha, get it? It's a dick joke.

Ok, seriously, though, Japan is a weird fucking place for dating. When I was there I ended up dating a Korean, of all things. A little bit of me is jealous of you at living the weeb dream, but honestly, a foreigner dating Japanese girls is always going to be a minefield.

>>16645181
I'd fix your place up, maybe get something slightly nicer, but that's about it. Don't flaunt it, just have a clean, working, tasteful place.

Not like I don't know the feeling, though - I have decent money and a nice studio too, but I can't bring women to mine because it's covered in anime posters and figures and I have a life-size waifu pillow in a very obscene state of undress on my bed.

>>16645257
It depends on the question. I'll bullshit/obfuscate it if necessary and not critical that I tell the exact truth.

>>16645276
Sometimes, although my dong flopping around is the bigger problem.

Boxer briefs fix it but I sometimes run out of clean ones and have to default to normal boxers, and it sucks. It's hard to get to sleep at night because of my dick being tricky.
>>
Why do girls only like me when I treat them like shit?

It's the same damn cycle over and over.

>Completely ignored/sidelined until I start being an asshole
>Suddenly have to beat girls off with a stick
>Get in relationship
>GF can't stay off my dick as long as I'm mean to her
>Can't handle the guilt of being mean
>Start being nice
>GF loses interest
>We break up

All I want is to be nice to girls and make them happy. Why do they only like it when I'm mean to them?
>>
>>16645376
seems like being mean is what makes them happy. your methodology is all wrong.
>>
>>16645388
It doesn't make ME happy, though.

Being a bastard just makes me feel horrible and I have to force it.

Why is having a nice relationship impossible?
>>
>>16645396
it's not u just have to find one of them psychotic girls who have no self esteem and like to be worshipped
>>
Been talking to this girl for a few months, got introduced to her by a mutual friend. We're really close friends now. She's turned me down in the past, citing school among other things, but she's not trying to get into a relationship anytime soon. Would it be appropriate to still ask her to be my Valentine? She means a lot to me and we talk all the time. I just don't know if she'll feel like I'm being too pushy...
>>
>>16645405
don't do it anon
>>
>>16645397
I don't understand how not wanting to be abused and insulted and demeaned makes a girl psychotic.

Is there really something that wrong with me that I just want to see my girlfriend smile?
>>
>>16645405
No, because you don't mean it platonically. She already knows your feelings and she has rejected you.

You wouldn't ask some other female friend would you? You still want a relationship. Just don't do it.
>>
>>16645312
If you are the rich guy, "bullshitting/obfuscating" is lying. And lying, in a relationship, is bad.
>>
>>16645415
>Is there really something that wrong with me that I just want to see my girlfriend smile?

the way you go about it, yeh
>>
>>16645424
no, he's someone else. i don't like caps.
>>
>>16645376
Assholes only attract girls with issues, you know.
>>
>>16645425
I'd legitimately like to hear what you think I could do differently.

I'm at the point where I'm recovering from the last relationship and getting really close to becoming a douchebag again, and I really don't want that kind of relationship again, so advice would be nice.

>>16645433
Ugh, I know this is probably the truth, but for my whole life it's been this case of "attract no girls" or "attract girls with issues by being an asshole" and I eventually drift into the latter every time.

It's not even like I try to be an asshole, I just stop caring eventually after years in a row of failure, and the second I do it I suddenly become "interesting to women." It's absolutely maddening.
>>
>>16645458
What have you tried to do in relation to girls? Where have you tried meeting them etc.
>>
>>16645464
All kinds of places. Bars, clubs, school, through friends, conventions, whatever.

I dunno, it's just like the second I get bitter enough to be like "fuck girls" and start blowing them off, they suddenly can't leave me alone.
>>
>>16645490
>I dunno, it's just like the second I get bitter enough to be like "fuck girls" and start blowing them off, they suddenly can't leave me alone.
Because you're not desperate anymore. Desperation is obvious, and a huge turnoff

How are you an asshole to girls, btw?
>>
>>16645501
Nitpicking their appearance and personalities, calling them crazy, trying to blow them off, I dunno, whatever.

I don't even remember that much anymore since it's been a while since the last cycle.

I've had a long-running issue with getting "too close" to girls that are already in relationships with other guys (not all the way though) and it's probably for similar reasons, because I'm actively trying not to give them attention.
>>
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My female best friend crawled into my bed and tried to cuddle with me after having sex. I couldnt decide how to handle it because of the mix of emotions I felt so I slept on the couch while she apparently was waiting for me to come back.
Now we've had a bit of tension between us and probably made out a few times but she didnt want it to escalate to sex which I was cool with. However I am not okay with her trying to cuddle with me anymore after that stunt. She thinks I hate her because I spend less time with her and wont touch her anymore. And she is trying to make it up to her, but really Im just cutting out all parts of our relationship that blurred the line.
Women what would be going through your mind if you were her.
>>
>>16645509
Yeah, it definitely sounds like your main issue is desperation. You should just focus on yourself and your own life and goals, and it'll happen.
>>
>>16645519
I get what you're saying.

It's just hard not to seem desperate, I guess. I'm almost 30, it's been 3 years since my last relationship, I've been busting my ass for my own goals but everything seems so damn empty being alone, and it's hard not to focus on the ticking clock over my head.

It's like, when I don't try, nothing ever happens at all, and when I do try, I seem desperate. I wish I knew how to make things happen without seeming desperate, I guess.
>>
do european girls like american accents?
>>
>>16645518
Forgot critical point. Sex with another guy she didnt know for a one night stand. Im kinda disgusted with that behavior but Im not one to judge every thing a person does.
>>
>>16645529
It doesn't happen to everyone at the same time. I have a friend in her late 30s who has never met the right guy, despite being female and having 'life on easymode'. Another friend is 23 and has been dating her boyfriend for 5 years and they're still going super strong. Yet another friend has just turned 30, was divorced and has recently become engaged to a great guy and they're absolutely in love.

It'll happen when it happens. This isn't something you can force or rush
>>
>>16645518
I don't understand - you had sex but you refused to cuddle for some reason? With a girl you call your best friend? What in the world is going through YOUR mind?

>>16645540
If you're not exclusive then she has every right to do that. If you wanted exclusivity, you should have said so.
>>
>>16645518
>>16645540
That's an extremely critical point.
Have you told her WHY you reacted that way?

If she thinks you hate her, have you explained that you don't? Or do, I guess?
>>
Are femanons here?
>>
>>16645550
I think what he means is she fucked some dude and then tried to cuddle with him.
>>
>>16645543
Obviously, I know you're right.

It's just so damn frustrating, surrounded by friends who are dating, long-term, married, or even just posting about the girl they hooked up with last night, and meanwhile I've got nothing.

Sometimes I feel like I used up all my luck with the last one and don't have any left, and it fucking sucks.
>>
>>16645554
yeah
>>
>>16645561
Cool!
>>
>>16645550
Were not in a relationship. She can go sleep around if she wants, but its as >>16645555 said. Trying to cuddle with someone after having sex without someone else is so far in the realm of things that are not okay
>>16645551
Nah I dont hate her. I just see it as my fault for giving her the impression that something like that was okay. So im correcting our relationship. Ive told her I dont hate her.
>>
How does a guy feel about you when you he leaves, call you "my love" and gives a frontal hug? Parts of me has been thinking could it mean anything?
>>
>>16645550
>If you're not exclusive then she has every right to suck some chads cock and snowball you
Women logic
>>
>>16645576
He still loves you. But he decided to break up with you anyways. So keep that in mind.
Its kinda hard to get a guy back when hes like this. Logically hes going to shoot down any reason for you two to be in a relationship.
>>
>>16645576
Yeah, that probably means he likes you. I don't know what kind of incomprehensible fuckboy would call a girl "my love" without actually meaning it to some degree.

Seriously, if you like him, and suspect he likes you, just say something.
>>
>>16645554
what kind of question is this?
>>
>>16645539
meh, why not.
>>
>>16645577
He has ever right to fuck Stacy raw, it works both ways. It's not woman logic, it's everyone logic. Stop letting your hatred and bitterness towards women allow you to jump to conclusions.
>>
>>16645261
oh anon... how old are you? 16?
3-5 years is in the same age-range.
it starts to get weird if you are 20 or younger and the other person is above 30. everything else - meh
>>
>>16645584
With a purpose! ;D
>>
>>16645598
>Women honestly think this logic is okay
>>
>>16645518
How do you know she didn't want it to escalate to sex?

Are you sure it's not just because she thought you didn't want it to?

Man, if it were me, I'd just fuck her.

Honestly, fuck it, why do we put ourselves through all this shit and all these games when it's obvious what we want? It's stupid.
>>
>>16644232
Is it a really odd thing for a guy to listen to Bieber? I don't think his music is that shit
>>
I know its a probably a dumb, old question but why do woman in social events go to the bathroom in pairs?
>>
>>16645660
To talk.
>>
>>16645641
D
His new album is honestly pretty good, but it might seem weird if you are a massive fan of him and ONLY listen to him
>>
>>16645660
It's nice to have someone to talk to.
>>
>>16645641
I've heard so many people say that they really like his more recent stuff, I wouldn't really mind if you were similar
>>
>>16645641
I'm honestly not sure if it's worse that you only listen to Bieber or that I only listen to AC/DC and anime music.
>>
>>16645612
What purpose?
>>
>>16645660
Yep, talking.
>>
>>16645660

I'm a dude but let's apply some basic observation and logic skills here:

1.) Have you ever been to a loud venue? Guess where it's quieter

2.) It's actually sometimes easier to navigate/bulldoze past crowded areas in pairs vs yourself (plus you're less likely to get bugged by randoms who try to stop you to hit on you)

3.) Have you ever SEEN the women's restroom at a busy venue?

Lines literally out the door because
A.) women take longer than men (more clothes to take off that are tighter fitting and harder to put on in the first place, so just peeing takes longer)

B.) There are less facilities for women (women can only use toilets and you can put about 1 to 2 urinals in the space that it takes to have a bathroom stall).

C.) They actually tend to use the mirror in the bathroom to fix shit.

Which makes it handy to have someone else to talk to while while waiting around
>>
>>16644918
Yeah, manlets still gets easily laid you know
>>
>>16645724
True. Also, we don't just pee. We do some freshening up. That can be a quick mirror-check up to touching up our hair/make up. We check our outfit and clean/rearrange everyhting we aren't happy with. Maybe we also have an emergency (hole in panty hoses, broken nail, friend has a breakdown cause her bf ignores her, other friend is franatically asking every girl in the room if she has a tampon for her,..) fixing those needs assistance and time.
>>
Women, how much of a bonus is it if a guy smells good?
>>
>>16645749
>bonus
That's all it is. If he smells good, great. If he smells normal, that's fine. If he smells bad, obviously bad. Smelling good is just a bonus, nothing more
>>
>>16645749
Big one!
>>
I may be missing something here, but who the fuck is Brandon? I know someone of that name. Makes me curious?
>>
>>16645790
There was a guy who kept posting his (or someone else's) picture asking if he was ugly and how to get a girlfriend. Female Brandon is a girl who basically did the same thing. Neither are responsive to actual advice.
>>
>>16645800
Ah thanks bro. Not the abandon I know then. Much appreciated.
>>
>>16645624
A lot of people of both genders do. No matter the form (dating, bf/gf, fwb, fuckbuddies, ons, married, etc) you need to have a conversation about exclusivity, because it is not always implicitly understood.

If you don't like that, don't enter sexual or romantic relationships with people who do. Don't waste your time and energy bitching about other people having a different view of exclusivity than you.
>>
>>16645807
But that is exactly what he is doing, hes cutting her lose. You are the one bitching about it.
>>
>>16645807
Im not in a relationship with her and it has nothing to do with exclusivity. Can you honestly not see how its not okay to go cuddle with someone after having sex with someone else.
>>
>>16645854
Not the same anon, but don't worry.

That's definitely fucking weird.
>>
>>16645869
I just dont understand how she would think this was okay.
>>
>>16645879
Yeah that's kinda weird. Did she think she was in a teen movie?
>>
>>16645879
Have you asked her? She might not care that it's weird for you. If she trusts you, she might have wanted emotional comfort after getting railed, I don't know dude.
>>
>>16645894
She has a few beta orbiters (the stalker kind who come back no matter how bad you treat them) and I can imagine her getting away with it if its them. She probably doesnt even see the problem. Its so obvious that something like this isnt okay. I just dont understand.
Im not entirely sure if how Im handling the situation is correct. Shes been pretty desperate for "forgiveness" and doing things like kissing me on the cheek and trying to sit on my lap, baiting me into kissing her. But now I just assume shes just had sex with someone else and it reject it. Which of course makes her believe Im mad at her and she doesnt know why. She thinks its because she crawled into my bed without asking which is comical.
>>
>>16645854
Wait, what was the story? Did she fuck a dude, then came to your bed to cuddle? Oh wow... That would be very frucked up.
>>
Girls.

Ive messaged a girl i met on social media to ask her out, i know shes not read the message, its been two days and i know im being childish but the wait is killing me.

Would it seem strange or desperate if i now got her number through her friend so i could text her instead?
>>
>>16645929
I haven't been in your situation but I get what your saying man. Just tell her you think it's messed up she would do all that. The rest comes down to how much you really like her.
>>
>>16645947
Yes it would be. Don't do that. She's probably not into you, start preparing to deal with that. But a text won't help especially if she didn't personally give you her number.

Maybe try again in a week and if there is still nothing let it go.
>>
Question for the ladies:

So I'm an average guy with some standard insecurities. I don't approach women because I don't think they would be interested in me. Even when women approach me and flirt with me, I don't pursue the opportunity because I just assume that once they learn more about me, they'll stop being interested.

I'm quite happy with myself and my life. I'm proud of what I've done, and what I'm doing, where I've been, and where I'm going. My career is a large part of my life, and despite having no one to share it with, it fills me with immense satisfaction and purpose. But I'm afraid that I will continue pouring myself into my work for the rest of my life and eventually die alone.

How can I move past this idea of being worthless to women? Is there another option besides just dating until something clicks? Are there women out there mad enough to work through a shell like mine?
>>
>>16645980
It was on a night out i met her and we ended up making out for a while. Ill take your advice and leave it as is. Its pretty strange because im fine talking with girls and asking them out, just never had to rely on facebook for it before, im used to an instant answer.
>>
>>16645932
Yeah she tried that, I slept on the couch because I was conflicted about kicking her out. But now Im resolved to make sure nothing like this happens again.
>>16645950
Its not like Im saying we cant be friends. Just cutting out any grey area. I dont think I can reason with her and if she doesnt understand that I dont really trust her for other things.
>>
>>16645854
I platonically cuddle with members of the opposite sex so... No. Is this being done maliciously or because theyre oblivious to your feelings?
>>
>>16645996
So is the problem that she had sex with someone else, or that she wanted to cuddle with you after
>>
>>16646010
It doesnt matter which one you do. She likes you. But if you pick a bar, pick a quieter one so you can hear her.
>>
>>16646010
If you both enjoy a casual drink yes.
>>
>>16646001
This is why the red pill exist.
>>
I'm not sure if a girl I like reciprocates me, but I'm afraid that someone else may beat me to her if I don't take initiative
should I gamble and ask her out or should I wait to be closer to her?
>>
>>16646001
I platonically cuddle as well. But would never do it after having sex with someone else. Its clearly messed up.
>>16646006
The latter. Go cuddle with the guy you just had sex with. Im only upset with myself for giving her the impression that something like this was okay. Didnt think I came off as the emotional tampon type.
>>
>>16646020
Ask her out. Don't torture yourself. You want to, so do it.
>>
>>16646024
>emotional tampon
I kekd.
Sounds like you two have different ideas about emotional intimacy, and different morals regarding sexual boundaries.
>>
>>16646029
You know people cheat on others with that type of excuse.
>>
>>16646042
Youre thinking of morals
This isnt an excuse, this is an analysis.
Whether or not it was wrong is based on his own opinion, he was hurt by her actions regardless of why she did it.
>>
>>16646047
Whoops, different morals about cheating.
>>
My current gf has been bullied really badly in the past to the point where she now has permanent scars, trust issues, anger issues and will sometimes say she's not good at things or is useless, or will talk herself down. she's been through a lot, and I try my best to help her de-stress as best as I can, but sometimes she snaps at me, not like arguments, just small things easily trigger her, and if I say anything slightly wrong or try to explain things, she sometimes gets angry at that too. She does however look forward to talking to me and spending her time with me every day and we usually talk for hours on end.
Also, one of the games she likes to play is very stressful and makes her angry on nearly a daily basis.
What would you anons do in my position, Im trying to get her past this phase of stress and I'm willing to help her with anything to make her happy but I'm not sure if I'm doing the right things.

Also do any any anons/femanons have any suggestions to make her happy?
>>
>>16646029
I just cant understand how anyone can think something like that is okay. Guess cutting out any semblance of our relationship is the best option. I didnt really want to hurt her but its doesnt seem like we'll be able to understand each other.
>>
>>16646077
It's a grey area to me, I have a few female friends who wouldn't be weirded out by me having sex with someone, and cuddling with them after. But, I'm absolutely dead certain that if any of them had romantic feelings for me, I would find out quickly.
>>
I like a girl who gives me very mixed signs. I'm friends with her best friend. We are all adults. Is it stupid or childish or just wrong if I ask her friend about it? I mean if I ask her friend what's the deal with the girl and me, why she acts like that. I guess that would also imply somehow letting her friend know that I like the girl.
>>
>>16646061
posted this earlier in a thread about dealing with someone who's had issues in the past. Slightly relevant here.

>>16645829
>Just be a steady, consistent rock, that tries to be understanding, and stable. Don't be a pushover, and don't force things. Just be there, always, to provide support and reassurance for her to lean on if she needs it, but also let her stand on her own when she needs to.

>Treat her like the special person you think she is, but don't coddle and smother her like she's an invalid who can't fend for herself.

>Ultimately, when people are damaged in that way, what they need to learn first is to trust and believe in their own judgments, long before they can learn to trust others. Your role is to facilitate that

Basically it's equally important to support her, provide her emotional support, and let her vent, but also to not foster or condone bullshit habits, to not be her punching bag, and to be the sense of mature rationality when she's gone too far.

I'll repeat a line:
>Treat her like the special person you think she is, but don't coddle and smother her like she's an invalid who can't fend for herself.

She's a grown adult. Be there for her, but treat her like one, so that she remembers that she is one.
>>
>>16646139
are you by chance a female...
>>
>>16646152
If you are an adult ask her directly.
>>
>>16646183
Thanks, I'm gonna do that.
>>
Girls:

Is it acceptable to ask
a girl out for a coffee after knowing her for a week? Should I wait? Keep in mind I talked a lot with her and we even texted for a while, but so far we've only been out with our mutual friends.
>>
>>16644232
I'm a guy and my ex and best friend were drunk together and she came out of the blue and to,d me that she loves me but doesn't want a relationship at the moment I'm pretty blind to this shit and I need a fresh pair of eyes to look at this.
Am I being fucked around?
>>
>>16646205
Yes it's ok. Do it.
>>
>>16646205
I mean, that's how most of my friendships and relationships have started and I'm doing pretty well.
>>
I want to ask a girl (that I'm not dating but I'm interested in her) why she's been quite cold with me lately. I don't know how to word it right to make it sound the least awkward and unconfortable possible. Should I just ask her why I feel she's different with me than the rest? And I shouldn't imply it's my fault right?
Also, it's a bad idea to let her know that I like her, in this situation, right?
And I guess she's gonna deny being different with me maybe, any advice for what to do in that case? I'm confident enough around her but still a bit nervous and I'm sure I'm gonna get extra nervous in a serious talk like this, even though we should both be alone at that moment.
>>
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>>16644232
Girls: Where did I put my dress shirts? I can't find any of them in my dresser or my hamper and I fucking washed them last night.

What the fuck man.
>>
>>16644556
>> is working

You're doing something right.
>>
>>16646227
Why not do something simpler first? Ask how she's been feeling lately, because you think she's been feeling a bit off. That's just something off the top of my head which does carry as many negative implications and leaves it open for you to mention that you think she's been acting odd recently without stating off by saying she's been cold to you.
>>
>>16644942
Don't do it dude. I told the girl I loved about mine and she ran for the hills.
>>
When I have sex with my partner, I think of someone else, is that bad?
>>
Hey femanons
How was your first blowjob? How long did it take for you to make the guy cum?
>>
Girls and Guys, what is the best and most appropriate way for a girl/guy to lose the V-card?

A bf/gf, or a FWB/fuck buddy?
>>
>>16646308
How old are you?
>>
How much do muscles attract you girls?
Not the kind of muscles where some skinny dude is wearing a t shirt 2 sizes too small, but a buff guy who's wearing a sweater/jumper and you can see his round shoulders and the sweater hanging from his pecs - bare in mind his face is 7ish/10, would this be a turn on for you? In a club for example would you be happy if he showed interest in you?
>>
>>16646263
Yes, that's a very bad sign.
>>
My girlfriend's 'best friend' keeps pushing for me to get her hooked up with any of my single friends. I have a pretty small group of close friends, most of which have girlfriends. Of the two friends without girlfriends, one is in the marines and won't be back for another 8 months and the other outright said the girl was too ugly for him.

Will my girl's friend eventually leave me alone? Why does she feel the need to piggyback off our relationship? And I've already repeatedly told her all my friends are taken or in pursuit of a girl already. She's asked at least 10 times and I've only been dating my gf for a few weeks now.
>>
>>16646348
You should explain this to your girl and ask her to explain it.
>>
To the/a women of /adv/:

I approach you at your work and ask you for coffee. I offer to leave my number.

>we've spoken a few times before, you've helped me with my purchases each time
>you laughed at my jokes
>you said last time "I was thinking about you earlier"

What is the likely outcome of this?

I'm thinking four scenarios and their outcomes:

>you accept, things go peachy
>you decline, things go peachy. I'm not a pushy guy. I'd likely never shop there anymore because it's uncomfortable for everyone involved
>you don't respond: this is awkward as fuck, I'd probably take this as a 'no' and be on my way
>you make a scene

How likely is scenario #4?
>>
>>16646300
Hey Paulie
Fuck off
>>
>>16646368
The chance of you not getting either of the first two responses is about 99%.
>>
Texting a girl.

I said I was interested in talking to her more, and she said she wanted to talk more too.

I'm worried I've come on too strong, as she is less engaged. How do I walk it back? Just chill for a bit?
>>
>>16646308
The one that feels right leading up to it. I can't tell you which this will be for you.
>>
>>16646368
Why offer? Write it down beforehand and just give it to her.

If she does cool. If she doesn't cool.
>>
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I've been on a couple of dates and discussions always seem to turn sexual real fast. I'm a bit prudish, I don't like to talk about these things with effectively strangers. Some questions I've got:

>how big is your cock?
>have you masturbated while thinking of me?
>what's some of your fetishes?

This just makes me real uncomfortable, is this normal fare for women in the 25-27 range? I'm not going for obvious sluts, either, most of the women I've gone on dates with were very reserved and what I thought were conservative.
>>
>>16646386
That sounds like normal mid-20s thoughts, yeah.

I think you're confusing "healthy sexual activity" with sluts in this case. Sluts fuck around with people they don't care about and cheat, talking about sex and having a lot of it with someone you like, enjoy being around and want to be emotionally closer to is normal.
>>
>>16646394

I'd never ask a woman how big her tits were or how frequently she masturbated for example. It just doesn't seem like "coffee date" material discussion. It weirds me out to be honest.
>>
>>16646405
>I'd never ask a woman how big her tits were
I mean, you shouldn't have to, they're right there.
>or how frequently she masturbated for example. It just doesn't seem like "coffee date" material discussion. It weirds me out to be honest.
I mean, you do you. It's not for everyone, but being sexually invested in a romantic partner is pretty important to most people.
>>
Why can't i fucking cum or get hard enough?
Recently lost my virginity about a week ago and every time we've attempted sex I've either had a hard time getting it and keeping it up and I've never been able to cum.
This morning I thrusted for about 15 minutes as I started getting softer until she just said "you're done" and we went back to sleep.

It's getting annoying as fuck at this point.
>>
Don't you find it funny how you can post as the opposite gender in 4chan and after some time you start thinking like the opposite gender?
>>
>>16646455
uh you dont though
>>
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How fast does dick cheese accumulate on your penis? My boyfriend says maybe if he didn't clean his junk for a month it'd start to get painful. I'm curious
>>
>>16646580
depends on how you shower and how long your foreskin is

might take like a couple of weeks
>>
>>16644241
Honestly, I think it would weird the shit out of some girls. Some other girls might me completely ok with it though. I would be ok with it, for example. My best friend wouldn't
>>
>>16644367
Maybe she started acting cold to get reassurance out of you that you still liked her. Sometimes we do that, don't really know why, but slightly ignore or pick a fight with our SO just so they try to win us back. Show they care. It's weird, but it's true
>>
>>16644488
Nothing. It happens. Get over it. Doesn't mean she's not into guys.
>>
>>16644556
Nope to me. Might be to some. Still, most girls watch porn (or read hentai if they are into manga and shit, specially yaoi) so I don't think it would be much of a problem
>>
>>16644905
They usually notice faster than guys do, but sometimes choose to ignore it on purpose. It's the easiest way to not have to have an awkward conversation with a guy you don't like. Pretend you don't know he likes you
>>
>>16644936
Umm I sometimes fatasize about that sort of stuff too. Specially if I'm masturbating
>>
How do you ask a close friend or someone you barely know to be fuck buddies as a guy? Like theres no problem if a girl were to initiate but if a guy does that, all hell breaks loose
>>
>>16644232
Who is Brandon? Why is he so famous on 4chan?
>>
>>16646673
If there is overwhelming sexual tension that you are absolutely sure she is aware of, I think that's the only way you can suggest it.
>>
Guys if you wanted to flake from a date with a girl (that you set up), what excuse(s) would you use?
>>
Ladies find me attractive and are all over me at parties and whatnot. However I haven't been laid in almost a year now. It's partly because I can't close for shit but also because my personality is super fucking dull. How do I appear to be more interesting?
>>
>>16647047
"I won't be making it today/tonight."
>>
>>16647047
>I'm really busy
>I've got work/family obligations

Or my personal favorite

>my car is having issues
>>
Girls what do you like the most. An introvert or extrovert guy ? Let's assume they would both be confident.
>>
>>16647047
And another question. What could be the reason for flaking if he seemed really interested, always texted, flirted, talked about future dates and we were getting along really well?
>>
>>16647097
Extrovert to balance out my introvertness.
>>
>>16647102
There are hundreds of possible reasons, ranging from a gut feeling to finding out something terrible about your past.

If your inclination is to say "but there's nothing awful in my past," you've missed the point.
>>
>>16647097
If I'm choosing from either extreme, neither.

>>16647089
If you just want to get laid, you don't need to appear all that interesting

>>16646897
See >>16645800

>>16646386
Talking about sex is pretty normal. Maybe not on the first date, but soonish

>>16646368
I'd probably take it but never contact you, to be honest

>>16646348
Have you actually said no?

>>16646324
Muscles alone will not keep me interested in a guy

>>16646228
Under the fridge?

>>16646205
Go for it
>>
>>16646348
Talk to your girlfriend. Let her know that you tried (and it's clear that you have) but at this point, there's nothing you can do.
>>16646368
Depending on how chill she is, unlikely. Possibly #2 if she's not interested. I know someone who this has happened to with two separate guys approaching her at her job and she said no to both, however one of the two was because she just wasn't expecting it. #1 could happen but put all of your hope into it happening.
>>16646324
It's not the first thing I'm drawn to so I can't really say.
>>16646263
Yes.
>>16647097
My boyfriend is incredibly extroverted which balances my introversion nicely.
>>
>bump into cute girl I noticed before in my dorm
>we talk, she says she noticed me before and wondered what class I was in
>I mention I've seen her before and get her name
>bump into her again today
>leave the lift as she talking about her day (had stuff to do)
>we agree to continue the discussion another time
>see her on the dorm's Facebook Profile
>think about sending her a "so what were you saying in the lift?" or something to that effect.

Should I? Too creepy?

I can also just wait to bump into her at school or the dorm and get a better sense of how she is before ringing at her door and asking her out, which I'm going to do anyway.
>>
I was joking around with a girl I'm seeing on facebook and she sort of didn't get the joke and got slightly mad at me. I apologized even though I don't think I should have. She kinda said okay but still not sure how she feels.

What's the next step anyway? I don't want to be pushy desu, should I wait for her to talk to me first ?
>>
So, past months i've had this situation several times: I go out and meet a girl at a bar or just in the street and somehow we start talking. The conversation often goes smoothly and I can see she is interested,
but when her or my friends want to go to another bar or some other place the conversation often turns awkward really fast and I don't really know how to close.

Should I ask her number or stay with her and try to continue the conversation or something entirely different? I really suck in this part when it comes to meeting girls and/or hooking up(which is most of the time not my sole intention)
>>
>>16646368
Making a scene is definitely the most unlikely. Nobody enjoys that, and there's no need for it. It's a phone number, for Christ's sake.
>>
I think I'm in an abusive relationship and I don't have a way out of it. I'm scared even posting this because I made a post on reddit asking for advice like a year ago and my bf found it and he got really mad at me. He still holds it against me. My bf made me move to a different country and he's negative about my personal goals. I'm writing this because I'm kinda drunk and my bf isn't here.

I was living in a bad, abusive situation before I met my bf. He always says that if I don't like whatever our life is I can go back to that bad situation.

Right now I have like almost no money in savings but I'm trying to work online extra to get some money saved up. I need realistic advice about how to get out of this situation in a six month timeframe or less. I don't want to beg for money from strangers. I'm here because I need guidance on how to get out on my own.
>>
>>16647298
Beg for money from strangers.

Stop setting up obstacles. We can't help you if you're contributing to your own continued abuse.
>>
>>16647298
Are you that girl who moved country with her bf after backpacking with him?
>>
>>16647300
Like I totally get what you're saying, but I'm going to be honest and say that part of my resistance comes from the fact that I feel like I'm not someone who deserves money from strangers? Like, I'm in a bad situation and I want to get out of it myself, and if that means I have to be here longer that's okay. It's not physical abuse, it's just emotional, so I can withstand it longer. Do you know what I mean?
>>
>>16647310
I am a girl in similar situations but I don't really post on 4chan that often so maybe there's someone else you're thinking of?
>>
>>16647314
I don't care why you're working against yourself. It only matters that you are, and that you understand this simple concept: it is literally impossible for anyone to help you unless you first discontinue ALL of your choices which work against you. This isn't a sympathy issue. It's a practical one. Either you do everything humanly possible to help yourself or you wait for this situation to take its toll on you. Anything else is a waste of your breath and our time.
>>
Girls,

How would you honestly feel about your boyfriend being a foot fetishist ?
Would you agree to involve your feet into your sexual intercourse ? (that sounds completely retarded said like this but might as well ask)

I mean would you masturbate your bf with your feet, would you let him lick them etc. Not that i'm 100% into it, i'm really attracted to feet but i could easily do without it and i'd be ok if a girl doesn't want to, i really don't want to creep a girl out.

Because i really don't know how a girl might feel about that, honestly that seems really fucking boring to masturbate someone with your feet, and to have your feet licked must feel really freaking weird
>>
>>16647226
Just add her and go from there. That's fine

>>16647251
What was the joke? And just wait it out

>>16647293
Do what you want. If you feel a connection with her, get her number or stay.

>>16647333
If that were the only way he could get off, then it's a problem. Otherwise, it's fine
>>
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This is a stupid question for both genders, but what is cuddling like?
>>
>>16647388
it's like holding on to a warm teddy bear that is also holding you back

it's p nice desu it feels great, you can stay like that forever
>>
Women: if a guy asks you out and you're not interested, here's some ways to let him know:

- "no, sorry, I have a boyfriend/girlfriend"
- "no, sorry, I'm not interested"
- "no, sorry, I'm not dating right now"

That should be the end of it. I asked a woman out today and this is how she responded: she backed away maybe 6 feet and looked scared, her voice cracked and she said "sorry, no, sorry".

Please don't do this. This is a low blow, makes me look like some kind of monster.
>>
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>>16647390
s-sounds nice.
>>
>>16647396
While the heart of your advice is reasonable, you glossed over the girl in your story sounding like she has a severe anxiety issue. That's not as much a place for a kind request as it is for lots of therapy.
>>
>>16647413

I didn't mean that, it's just I can take a "no", but it's hurtful getting a response as if I was a rabid animal. I said "sorry if I made you uncomfortable" and off I went.
>>
>>16647427
Okay, it makes sense that you'd be hurt by the reaction. What does that have to do with the reaction being something which seems to come involuntarily from a mental problem? I can understand you asking emotionally sound girls to reject you politely. Bringing up the woman you asked out today makes it sound like you'd request a schizophrenic to please stop hearing voices.
>>
>>16647427
>I didn't mean that, it's just I can take a "no"
1, she didn't know that.
2, you're missing the point.
>>
>>16647451

Is it that common that men make a scene that it's unreasonable to think they can handle rejection? All I'm saying is that if you're going to reject someone, do it politely.
>>
>>16646451
maybe you're gay and in denial
>>
>>16647464
It's not about statistics, it's about fear. Sounds like that woman had a big fear of men. Fear doesn't care about logic. She needs help dealing with her fear, but I doubt that you being annoyed about it is going to change her behavior.
>>
how soon is too soon to tell your partner that you love them?
>>
>>16645749
More than most people probably think. Women can actually smell what immune system and symmetry genes a guy has. Guys with good and compatible genes smell naturally good.
>>
>>16645660
Talking definitely, but also safety. I'm a weak girl and I've always been taught to never go off to the bathroom alone. Sometimes shady stuff happens there, so having someone else is more comfortable.
>>
>>16647396
I just think you're taking it too personally. She was probably an introverted girl that doesn't know how to handle that type of demands.
It's not your fault, move on
>>
Girls:

There is (or was) a girl (my personal 11/10) that I "know" from school (never talked with her). I was looking at her often on school corridor, and few times she saw that and she was smiling to me. Unfortunetly, I was fcking coward and I didnt do anything...

Half year ago I finished school, havent seen her from this time, but I still thinkinking about her...

I know her name so I can write to her on FB, but do you think is it worth? Do I have any chances after this? What do you think?
>>
For girls and maybe guys
So I'm trying to slide into this girls DMs. The only way I'll know it's successful is if she follows me back.
What do you think would be the most perfect opening line when I first message her?
I was thinking, "hey, I randomly came across your page when looking for someone and just wanted to say you're cute"
Good? Bad. Anything I can do to tweak it a little?
>>
>>16647592
Just fucking do it. The worst thing that can happen is that she ignores you. And if that is the case, she didn't even know you existed. If you don't contact her, she'll never talk to you.
>>
>>16647611
>she didn't even know you existed.

She know about me (there was few sitiuations that make me sure about it), but I have no idea what she can think if I write to her after few months, it looks beta as fuck.
>>
Girls:

If a guy you knew of in high school—but never really talked to or hung out with—messaged you on Facebook and, after some conversation, asked you if you wanted to hang out sometime, would you think it was a thinly veiled date or a purely friendship related thing?

I'm headed to university soon and the girl in question lives in the same city. She took about 5 days to say yes but I'm not sure how this fits into everything.
>>
>>16647655
Thinly veiled date... which isn't a bad thing. But she doesn't seem interested.
>>
>>16647632
Contacting someone isn't beta, being beta about it is. Message her and ask her to coffee to catch up, dude. If she responds see what happens.
>>
My gf of four years and I have been having a rough patch.

She got off birth control recently, and since then has had zero sex drive. She says she is afraid of getting pregnant, even with condoms. But she doesn't even want to have oral sex or anything.

This has been going on for months now, where we have sex maybe once then not again for 2-3, sometimes 4 weeks.

What bothers me the most is that in the past, before we were dating, she had two one night stands. One involved sex, the other was going to but the guy couldn't get hard. She knew these guys from High School, but didn't know them besides knowing who they were.

She broke up with her boyfriend of three years in High School and two weeks later slept with this guy. Then a few weeks after that she hooked up with the flaccid guy.

This didn't really bother me until recently, because two past partners isn't a large number to me. But it gets to me every time she says "no" to me.

You won't even let me put my arm around you, but you'll let a guy inside you after two weeks of talking?

I texted her an hour ago saying that this bothers me, but in a more polite manner. I basically said it bothers me that I feel like I'm not as close to you after four years as these guys were after two weeks.

She'll probably never respond, or get really upset and blame me, but whatever. I had to get it off my chest.

Any advice for the coming fire? If it helps, when we first started dating for the first year or so we were having sex three times a day. We've probably had sex over five hundred times total since we started dating, but now it's down to once a month - two months.
>>
For many years ago i liked this girl, and she and her friends knew. I never did anything about it, but almost evertime I walked past her in school her friends "friend-teased" her, wich was obious was about me, and then she got very embarresed. So do you guya think she liked me?
>>
>>16647683
Her first message and her message saying yes both had a smiley faces; does that mean anything?

Do you think it could have been a shittest or something similar?
>>
To girls:
If u like music like Justin Bieber or something like that, do you think guys who listen to death metal seems strange and then you find them less atractive?
>>
>>16647731
don't over-analyze it.
if she said yes go for it, you'll see how it goes
>>
>>16647713
I wouldn't say that the teasing is proof, especially since they knew you liked her.

>>16647689
I'm not sure what you expected from attacking her about something that she did so long ago. I don't think that'll convince her to sleep with you more.

I'm someone with a low sex drive who has had some casual sex. For me, it's because I am only horny once in a blue moon. So the ONS I happened to be horny. Its easier to do that than maintain a relationship, since I don't want sex as frequently as relationships have it.

It seems like you equate sex with love and closeness. Which is a common love language. It's hard for me to give you advice, since I don't relate. When I feel really close to someone, it doesn't turn me on. Having an intimate moment makes me want to cuddle and hug, but sex is not something that often pops into my mind. I often had to remind myself that that was something that my ex needed.

It's certainly not a need for me. And sometimes I just really didn't want to go along with it (especially since I did all the work with my ex).

It was a contributing factor for our split. Certainly a lot else was wrong, but it added to the tension.

I don't think your girlfriend is exactly like me, but I thought I'd give you another perspective. I never avoided sex because I hated my ex, or because I didn't feel close to him, or because I didn't like him around. I just didn't have the desire. And having sex when you don't really want to is not fun. I've had a lot of that kind of sex. It made my skin crawl.
>>
>>16647753
You sound a lot like my gf, and I kind of sound like your ex.

Not good....she hasn't responded. I didn't attack her, I just told her that not having sex in my life makes me feel like she was closer to her ex's than she is to me after four years of dating.

I hope she doesn't take it badly...I love her, but if she doesn't want sex than I can't be with her. I need sex to feel loved, especially if the girl had casual sex in the past.

I don't think girls understand that letting a guy inside you is the largest sign of love possible to a guy. if you let someone inside you, that means you trust them fully. If my gf won't let me inside of her, to me that's saying "I know we've been dating for four years, but I don't trust you as much as that random guy I made out with then a week later slept with."
>>
>>16647764
Personally, I did really trust the guy I had casual sex with.
While I would say sex is usually a sign of trust, I can't relate with saying that no sex is a sign of mistrust.

I understand that you need sex to feel loved and happy. But why is her world view wrong? If girls are supposed to understand guys, why can't guys understand girls? Why is her unhappiness worth less than your unhappiness?
(and from the conversations I've had with other guys, I think you're generalizing your own experience. I know guys who disagree with you about the significance of sex)

If you guys are incompatible, you're incompatible. She's not doing it to spite you.
>>
Question for females.

I tend to fill my schedule to the max while uni is in session. I'm taking 18 credit hours, 5 classes and two music credits for ensemble and lessons. I work two jobs at the university, plus I tutor independently in the evenings.

When I get home I do HW and practice then it's usually 10 pm and I suck fuck it I'm going to bed.

My last dating situation didn't work out because I hardly made contact with the girl throughout the week. DESU I have a great deal of stuff on my mind aswell during the week that wasn't her.

How do I make dating work in my situation, or is it impossible? I think I might be spread to thin atm.
>>
Arranged an informal date with a girl during the afternoon. In the evening, said girl cancels the date shortly before going out, saying that she's out for dinner with her parents, she can't be home on time and she feels tired after working all afternoon.

What do I do? I texted her saying "don't worry, I'll meet a friend anyway". Should I wait a few days and try again, hope she'll be the one to arrange a new date or move on?
>>
>>16647796
Eh, wouldn't want to date a girl who detatches emotion from sex. Not wife material.
>>
>>16644232

Femanons, what would you make of a woman with only guy friends?
>>
Anyone, m or f

I was at a new years party and at one point my friend was talking to a girl and said to her while I was passing that I should be her midnight kiss.
Then later another friend was trying to set me up with her.
Then she said she doesn't actually have a crush on me but right after her friend said I should go for it, I told her what she said but she said go for it again.

Do you think she actually likes me or what? It's confusing as shit.
Can't ask her out without knowing, would make things extremely awkward if she said no given our shared friends
>>
Me and a female coworker recently added each other on facebook. We talk quite a bit at work and it's comfortable and easy, but talking on facebook is impossible because I'm autistic or some shit.

We had one conversation online a couple of days ago but we mostly just complained about to each other. How do I start future conversations and move towards, like, other shit? I haven't talked to anyone online since, like 2004. I can't talk to her at work anymore because we're on different shifts.
>>
>>16647740
If you listen to nothing but death metal, yes it is weird. There's a ccouple good death metal bands that put out incredible music, but never respond "I listen to death metal" when someone asks you what music you listen to.

I usually answer "I like progressive rock and classical music and certain metal bands". Don't ever say black or death metal. Most people will just think you're constantly angry and hateful. I know that's not true, but let's be real people are stupid and have no idea how to appreciate instrumentalism.
>>
>>16648449
Do stuff like ask her how her day was or talk about a photo she posted or whatever.

>>16648177
I'd think she was drama. Those 'I don't like girls, they only bring drama' girls are always the ones who bring drama

>>16647889
If you want to date, you have to make time to date. I don't know if I could deal with a guy like you, because your life is clearly focused on a couple of things and I don't know if I'd want to try and compete with those things

>>16647740
People who only listen to one type of music are an issue, both you and her

>>16647689
Welcome to the beginning of the end. You know the reasons why she's acting the way she does, and then you're attacking her for something she did over four years ago. You were super irrational, and that's just going to cause resentment on both your ends. I really don't know how you can erase the effect this is going to have

>>16647655
>thinly veiled date
This one

>>16647592
What do you have to lose?
>>
How do women feel about being asked out almost immediately?
>>
To girls.

Did you sent your nude selfie to your bf by yourself or did he have to ask for them?
>>
>>16648516
What do you mean by immediately?

>>16648520
I don't send nudes
>>
>>16648524
Like let's say you're at the store and I came up to you and just asked you , "Hi! Do you want to go on a date/have lunch/have some coffee?
>>
>>16648530
Definitely not. I don't know you, you could be a complete freak or an asshole or whatever.
>>
>>16648533
I'm always told by friends to go out and meet someone at a bar or some shit and I tell them 'no' because some random stranger won't wanna hang out with another stranger.

Your response to that question is precisely why I don't go out to places and meet other people. It's stranger danger, which I understand completely
>>
>>16648546
There's a difference between asking someone out right away, and chatting to them for a bit before asking them out. The latter is pretty acceptable in bars and clubs and whatever. Your friends are not wrong to encourage you to engage in that behaviour
>>
>>16648549
But I don't even bother with attempting to chat because of my fear of chicks having the same reaction to any scenario.

Don't tell me that if you're at some fye (for example) and some dude comments about an album you have in their hands, then you chat it up and he seems nice or whatever, and he asked to see you again, you would?
Even though he's still a complete stranger?
>>
>>16648590
That'd honestly depend on a lot of different factors. How long we talked, whether we seemed to have some chemistry, and yes, whether I was attracted to him. I really couldn't say yes or no based on that alone
>>
>>16648493
>>16648449
Every time I think of doing that I just see myself as intrusive.
>>
Is it true that the first message on an online dating site doesn't really matter, that women make up their minds whether or not they'll date a guy just from his picture alone?
>>
>>16649300
Well, how do you decide who to send a message to?
>>
>>16647910
Good question, I'm wondering something similar. Had plans later in the week, caught a cold on Monday.

I'd wait a few days, give some space. I'm trying to do that now. Trying.
>>
Girls, in this scenario what should the husband do?

His wife no longer wants to have sex with him and she isn't ok with him sleeping with other women. He's already tried communication and even couples therapy, but it hasn't changed this scenario.

Girls, what do you think the husband do here?
>>
>>16649513
Divorce her, or suck it up.
>>
>girl invited me out suddenly
>had a nice time
>start texting her more
>agree to meet again
>gets sick, hasn't mentioned delaying meeting
>gets less responsive

Should I just wait for her to contact me?
>>
Well I got a question for women.

I've dated a few girls and in the past when they were sad or upset they would want talk to me and seek comfort. I've dealt with two girls who were possible girlfriend material, but they had this one trait that made it awful to try to connect to them.

This trait is when they got depressed they would refuse to talk to me and ignore my existence. I don't very much like this at all. They say they have a romantic interest in me but then they pull this shit and I'm just kind of left high and dry just waiting until they get the fuck over it if ever.

Am I just being jerked around and they just don't give a shit about me and I'm just too much of a trusting ass?
>>
>>16646177
Nope.
>>
>>16649615
A lot of people recluse when they're having a depressive episode. It's nothing against you. Though, i recommend you avoid dating depressed women if you have absolutely no understanding of how to help.
>>
ladies can I get your input on whats going on through a girls mind in >>16649385
basically girl I like chooses other guy who only wants to bang her. After he does he leaves her and this happens with a few more guys and now shes trying to start something up with me again.
>>
>>16649636
Apparently I'm the speical snowflake I guess because when I have mine and I want to blow my brains out, all I want to see is the person who I'm romantically interested in.

But it's not like I can force myself into their lives if they won't even talk to me. All I can do is say the same bullshit over and over "Well I'm here for you if you want to talk. I care about you." Meanwhile they will talk to everyone who isn't me about this trash.

There isn't much you can do when you give someone the freedom to not associate with you when they are like this, except feel like shit that they don't want you in their lives at their lowest.
>>
>>16649649
Sounds like daddy issues.
>>
>>16649655
I'm always torn between desperately wanting my partner, and feeling a crippling fear that I'm unworthy of their presence. Results in me trying to reach out, and also being distant as fuck.
>>
>>16649668
Please for the sanity of the guy you date, please try to understand that if they thought you were EVER unworthy of their presence they would have dumped your ass and gone on to fuck a whore.

Like, I can't be any more blunt about this. Trust in your partner and trust that he sees value in you even when you feel otherwise. Because what I'm living now is fucking awful and I hate this. I feel fucking awful, sad, rejected, alone, and I just want to kill myself because the one person I want to talk to doesn't want to even speak to me but will speak to everyone else, this is awful and I'd hate for anyone else to feel this way.
>>
>>16649311
You can't compare that at all. Guys message everyone from people they just find attractive to people who they genuinely feel they might have a connection with - and the spectrum of what guys find attractive vs. what women find attractive is pretty big. Women seem to look at the picture, see that it's not Johnny Depp, and ignore it without even visiting their page.
>>
>>16644552

He is damaging his tranny. He also might feel like he has nothing to offer you so he mentions it ad naseum thinking "this will make her think i am useful to her."

Maybe you could something you know hes right about and stroke his ego that way? Then give him the sex he wont expect it.
>>
>>16649695
Actually a dude, but yeah, your advice is still good. I understand what you're saying, and I always reach out to my girlfriend, its just that sometimes its hard and she has to reach out to me.
>>
File: birthday.candles.jpg (387KB, 900x600px) Image search: [Google]
birthday.candles.jpg
387KB, 900x600px
Went on three dates with girl. Made out but haven't had sex. No plans to hang out but today's her birthday. Should I get her something, and if so, what?
>>
>>16649773
Take her out on a special date instead
>>
>>16649783
What's a special date?

I've been wanting to take her to a drive in theater that's about 1hr away. Is that special? I imagine anything that takes some effort is going to be special somewhat.
>>
>>16649792
Can you take a picnic or something to the drive in?
>>
>>16649807
I live in Florida, unfortunately. A picnik is like suicide by ant.
>>
>>16649812
Then maybe take her out to a nice restaurant instead.
>>
Guys, what are your go-to ways to get your gf/wife in the mood?
Girls, assuming you had no plans on having sex on a given day, what things can a guy do that might help his odds of getting lucky?
>>
>>16649812
>Not having a truck bed to line with 5 blankets and having a picnic in there.

Step it up senpai.
>>
>>16649563
You're getting phased out. You can try to set up another meeting but after that don't bother
>>
Is it a good idea to pursue someone you like and get along with so far, BUT ~30% of the time you have no idea what they're saying/talking about at all, blank stares , and its the same for them? Like he just switches topics awkwardly sometimes and i have 0 idea to keep up, and he doesnt get my humor at all 30% time. I dont want to waste my/his time

I think this one is more of my hormones/chemicals speaking. But i dont know if i am thinking too much??
>>
>>16649902
Go on a few dates, if you like him more because of said dates, continue dating. Repeat until you stop liking him or you die.
>>
Ok women.
The fuck are you doing with all that god damned fucking toilet paper?
I've had multiple female roommates over the years and, Jesus, it's become so god damned apparent now that I live alone that you guys apparently just flush down fistfuls of the stuff every time you use the bathroom.

So what the fuck are you doing in there? Yeah, I know your vagina isn't exactly as conducive to orderly pissing like the penis, but god damn, you don't need half the roll to clean up.

Three or four squares, nicely folded, should be more than enough to wipe up any sort of piss related mess, even if your pisser acts like a sprinkler on mist function.
>>
>>16649824
Just make it a whole night of "I find you sexy as fuck".
Not just 10 minutes before bed time ask her "You wanna fuck?"

Make a nice meal, dress up a little nicer, groom. Open a bottle of wine. Be all touchy (not groping like a 14 year in a movie theatre, touchy nicelike, like you would a new car).

Generally make it a whole night of her feeling like she's the sexiest woman on the planet.
That really gets them running
>>
>>16649911
Hmm, i guess i will. I just keep spiraling into the future, like i think if anything happened i would be sick of him and vice versa after a while. But i rarely rarely like people, so i will just give it a chance then


>>16649917
Dude, 3 or 4 squares is way not enough not to get moist piss coated hands. It's sort of like a cavern where we wipe so you also need extra tp to reach up there so you dont get moist fingertips. Dont be an angry dumb about t
>>
>>16649917
Because >>16649927

If you want us to use a couple squares then shove our rank, stale-piss coated pussy in your face for oral sex later in the day, sure. I'm sure we can all agree that's a fine trade-off.
>>
>>16649927
>you also need extra tp to reach up there so you dont get moist fingertips.
You know there's a sink in the bathroom right
>>
>>16649927
I mean... you should be washing your hands anyways after finishing your business down there so I don't get why most fingertips is now a problem when you are going to clean your hands two seconds after.
>>
>>16649935
Jesus, do you not understand how germs work?

>piss fingers
>have to touch clothing
>have to flush the toilet
>have to turn on the sink

Enjoy all the piss gradually coating your stuff over time.

God, guys are gross.
>>
>>16649927
>>16649931
Look, I'm just mad because on my own, I discovered I used one roll a month. And I even dab the head with a square.
Where as splitting it with one woman, we'd go through one in every 4 or 5 days.
I feel a little cheated, you know, for having to split the cost 50/50.

I've never seen a woman piss up close, admittedly, but even if you're filtering that shit through a pastrami sandwich, surely there must be a lot of wasted paper to account for the discrepancy.
>>
>>16649938
Wipe with your left hand you fucking cretin
>>
>>16649939
Then instead of asking dumb questions, tell her you're going to buy your own toilet paper and she needs to buy her own because she's using way more.
>>
>>16649917
Periods. I can assure you, most of the toilet paper is being used in that one week every month.
>>
>>16649944
Look how well that works for India.
>>
>>16649938
>Germs
I don't think you know how germs work, let alone how piss works as a whole. Piss has about as much germs as your mouth contains there girl. So when you are slobbing on that cock or cunny, you are basically spreading your disgusting germs all over their sexual organ. But you don't see any problem with that.

Let alone apparently how to clean yourself, or how to use one hand that's clean to pull up your pants, flush your shitter and turn on the sink.

It isn't that hard girl, I've had TP break and get shit on my wiping hand, it isn't like I've never achieved the feat of putting on my pants, flushing a toilet or turning on a sink with one hand.
>>
>>16649938
>do you not understand how germs work?
You apparently don't. Piss is relatively clean, and there's the hand you arent using to wipe anyways.
>>
>>16649949
India has a bigger problem than using too little TP in the bathroom. They are shitting in public where there is no bathroom. They had to do a god damn PSA about where shit belongs, trying to correlate india to you being unable to do a simple task with a free hand because one fingertip has pee on it is not the plight of india and should not be compared as such. You are going to wash your hands a minute later, unless you are some disgusting savage that doesn't wash their hands after using the restroom.
>>
>>16649958
That's a myth.
Piss is "sterile" but only from the kidneys.
Once it's in the bladder and especially as it passes through the urethra, it has plenty of opportunity to get contaminated.
Especially with women.
Those bulldog jowls are mighty fine home from all kinds of little critters.
>>
>>16644556
that's actually a huge turn on for me and I have no idea why. I was persuing a guy who did that for almost a full year before giving up.

>>16644918
absolutely. as long as you're not a midget

>>16644942
my boyfriend has severe depression as well. it puts a huge strain on our relationship at times, but I'd rather know about it than have him deal with it on his own.
Tell her, but be prepared to deal with everything that comes with it

>>16644954
if a weird fetish is making you question your relationship: you're not ready to marry her.

>>16645749
hella bonus.
>>
For guys: is it more of a turn off for a girl to not shave, or for the area around her vagina to be red/bumpy?

I've always shaved for my boyfriends whether or not they ask me to, but it's hella uncomfortable and I have pretty sensitive skin down there.
>>
So, my bf low key hinted that he got cheated on in the past. I wasn't sure if he wanted to talk about it or not. The topic arised because a good friend of him recently broke up a ltr because her bf cheated on her.
Guys, if you were in his situation, would you want to talk about getting cheated on with your gf or not?
>>
>>16650002
Depends on whether you look like an Imam or a Mexican teenager down there.

If my tongue needs a machete to find the sacred idol, then, yeah, defoliate.
>>
>>16650002
Girl here, i just keep my pubes trimmed short. I also use conditioner to keep them silky smooth. Never had any complains. I get ingrown hairs and razor burns very easily and i feel way better with trimmed pubes than "completely bald".
>>
>>16650003
>Guys, if you were in his situation, would you want to talk about getting cheated on with your gf or not?
Not really. I don't like talking about sensitive topics for the sake of it. If I felt it was appropriate I would have brought it up directly.

>>16650002
Trimmed seems like a happy medium
>>
>>16648493
We actually worked it out. she said she felt bad, and that she wants to start having more sex, she just wants more control. she wants to be the one who initiates. I guess I just got too grabby.

makes sense, most of the time when we had sex in the past she was the one to initiate. I just have to control myself around her and wait for her signal.
>>
My GF is 5'1 and Asian. Before we came together she partied a lot and drank very much (me too so not a problem). We are together for 5 1/2 Months now and went on holiday together over New Year.

In summer was the last time we drank together, where I easily drank twice as much as her. Now since we are together I stopped drinking and she claims she did too but on our vacation she outdrank me by much. I admit that now I tolerate nearly nothing anymore but anyway but I am a 6'1 white male.

In her defense I could see the alcohol on her (she visible gained weight) and the time where she could be partying we nearly always write or Skype etc.
The question is now that it is possible that a small asian girl could keep such an high tolerance without drinking.

Sorry for my bad english
>>
>>16648590
I probably would. For coffee or something. Coffee not being an euphemism of anything else
>>
>>16649917
That's....not true. Also, we bleed from our vaginas, remember? Lady parts also leak other fluids appart from pee
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