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always nervous around girls
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice

Thread replies: 18
Thread images: 1
24 virgin here, never had a serious relationship, I fear I'm just too far gone to never get a gf. I've gotten some really cute girls from tinder to go out with me, I've been approached by girls at bars and at work, but I always get so nervous I just act weird and creepy and blow it every time. Don't know what to do. I'm always stepping out of my comfort zone hoping the exposure will change me but it never does, I always wind up feeling embarrassed and hopeless. I don't know what to do. Accept being a forever alone anon?
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>>16643121
Just stop caring about "feeling embarrassed". Nobody cares, and they'll care even less if you don't make a big deal of it.

Been with my girlfriend for a little longer than 3 years now. I'm still super nervous around girls, but i just don't let it bother me anymore. I noticed now that i don't let it get to me, they seem to show a lot more interest.
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>>16643121
Just treat them like dudes at first. Turns out girls are humans too and act like humans also. Most of my hookups that I've had are because I talked with them like I do my guy friends. Joked around, talked, hung out, etc. I really wish we could lose all this bullshit about putting girls on pedestals. They're great, don't get me wrong, but they're just stupid humans like you or me, dude.
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>>16643213
>Just treat them like dudes at first
never do this
you will have sex never
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>>16643681
this guy doesn't get it, or treats dudes in a weird way

>>16643213
this guy sort of gets it

>>16643165
this guy gets it


Anyway your anxiety is normal. You are entitled to your anxiety. It must happen. But you will get better. Just remain determined and don't stop talking to girls. You'll get better at it. Good luck.
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>>16643681
That's weird. I seem to get sex for doing something that apparently won't get me sex. Oh well, I don't really care what this anon thinks. Best of luck to you, OP.
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Bobbers.
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>>16643692

I seem to be getting worse though. Date I had the other day seemed really sweet and I think my nervousness made me come off rude to her. I feel really bad that she wasted her time.
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Once you get them to a date say literally this and everything will go so much better


>Hey I think you're really cool, but to be honest I'm kind of shy around new people, especially attractive girls, if I say or do anything too weird for you feel free to tell me

Not only will you come off as genuine, you will actually be genuine, and by saying this she will lower her guard a little, because she herself is probably nervous. Seriously OP try this, I promise it will help.
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>>16643681
As a girl, I like when guys treat me like a bro. It makes me more comfortable around them, and I feel like it actually makes it easier to flirt with them. Imo, the best way to start a relationship is with friendship first. But then again, I guess most girls would rather have the guy be the one who is straightforwardly flirty.
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>>16643681
this x1000
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>>16644139
they're not treating you like a bro
they're making you think they are
and there is a massive difference you might never know
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>>16643121
Damn bro, are you me? I'm 22 and I just can't fucking shake this. I used to have severe social anxiety and I got over it with literally everyone else except attractive girls, who still make me a nervous wreck. I have done some seriously cringeworthy shit around them. I hate myself for it.

>>16643213
This is what I've been doing lately and I've got to say it's helping. Just imagine that they have a penis. Getting sex out of your head takes the pressure off.

>>16643681
This guy is missing the point. You should treat them like dudes just so you can get over your anxiety of talking to them. Once you do this for a while you won't be as nervous and you can then work on seduction. It's about baby steps.
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>>16644022
>I feel really bad that she wasted her time.

See, this is the wrong approach. You're putting her on the pedastal and trying to win her approval. You gotta turn the tables and have the mindset of "Is this girl good enough for me?", not the other way around.
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>>16644130
Not OP but I was just thinking about trying this approach the other day. Should i say this before the date, like when texting? Or wait until the date?
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>>16644170
This might be true. They most likely don't treat me the exact same way that they treat their male friends. But I'm still treated like a valued friend rather than just a sexual prospect, and that's what counts to me.
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>>16644022
Were you quiet? Shyness or nervousness, to her, may have just seemed like you weren't interested or bored. Did you contact her at all after the date?

You seem like a really cool guy OP, you shouldn't think they're wasting their time by spending it with you. You seem super nice, and like you really care about whether she's having a good time.
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>>16644247

Yeah, she said a few things and seemed like she normally texts me, but never replied when I asked if she wants to meet again. So its done.
Thread replies: 18
Thread images: 1
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