So a half an hour ago I was walking in the city on my way home. There were these UNICEF-volunteers hanging in the streets approaching people talking about little kids in Africa having trouble finding water and bladeeblabla... She asked my age, I responded with "23" and she said excellent and she asked me if I'm happy and I told her "someday are happier than other days", she said "it's because its fall and the days are getting darker soon." I said yes again. And then she told me "You know what's worse? Little kids in Africa who are sad because they have a lot of trouble getting water blablbala" After that she asked "now would you be interested in a monthly donation..." blabla you know the rest!
So what was my answer? "Yes! I'm interested..." Did I say yes because I wanted to? Or yes just because I was afraid to say no. Anyhow, I filled the forms but I told her that I'm going to think about it first before I'm depositing money for UNICEF"
Also might add that I am 23 years old and never had a gf, I am a student who barely can get money. I don't know but I have a hard time saying "no" because I'm not very confident and I'm also weak to say no to beautiful girls, she was indeed beautiful.
Help me guys, how would you've taken the situation under control? What should I do in the future if I'm coming across a similar situation? I need your help!
I had the same problem in my late teens people would ask for donations I'd panic and sign the form.
The thing that brought me out of my shell was getting a new job, socialising and going to bars with friends, working on my confidence and self esteem by setting targets and achieving them, going to the gym and getting fashion tips.
Of you could just say "sorry I'm late for work/my bus/meeting my friend" and make sure you know what to say to them as soon as you spot them, good luck fellow anon.
What you did was probably the best course of action - agree, come up with some excuses to not do it right now, then GTFO.
>and I'm also weak to say no to beautiful girls, she was indeed beautiful.
That's why they go to a modelling agency and pay the girls to do street campaigns (what, did you think they were doing it out of the kindness of their hearts?). They get a flat fee for showing up, and a tiered bonus on how many signups they get. They also get a "playbook" with lists of "if someone says no for x reason, use y argument". So called charaties figured out a long time ago that you get a higher profit margin* by paying people like that than by using volunteers.
Most charaties are scams in some way or another, and generally the bigger the charity the bigger the scam. When you sign up to those $5 a month schemes, you will get a call every single month asking you to go up to $10. Do that and next month they'll ask you for $20, so on and so forth. The call centre staffs motivation? If they get you to increase your payments, they get 50% of the increase for 6 months as payment.
And that, of course, is where the catch lays. A charity doesn't donate all its money to good causes - just it's "profit". If you donate a mil to my charity, I can buy myself a couple of brand new Bentlys (for "charity work"), give myself a 500k bonus (I just collected a million, I'm worth it), hire some escorts and take them on a round the world "all you can snort" cocaine cruise (to "raise global awareness"), then give the remaining 32c to some junge bunny in a mad hut and call it a day. In the eyes of the law, there's nothing wrong with that.
But the actual problem is that I couldn't refuse quickly to listen to what she was going to say otherwise I could've say no quickly and move on. But it was kind of a mind control she did on me :D, maybe I'm exaggerating but its probably because I never had a gf that I acted submissive towards her...
Next time tell them that you only donate money through charities promoted by your church or that you need to talk to your pastor or some dumb shit like that. they will probably leave you alone. I usually just keep walking with a "sorry, not interested" or just shake my head if they're not too aggressive, but on occasion I've gotten caught and I usually say that I already have causes that I support and all the money I intend to give goes to them.
the key is to remember that no hot girl carrying a clipboard is approaching you to ask you out, so you can ignore them without any consequence - the only consequences come into play if you stop to talk and they wring your money out of you.
Hey OP and anons, a few things.
They may actually care about what they're doing. I've seen a lot of volunteers put that much energy into something they care about.
As for how to take control of the situation, this quote from the Boiler Room does a great job explaining how the world works:
"And there is no such thing as a no sale call. A sale is made on every call you make. Either you sell the client some stock or he sells you a reason he can't. Either way a sale is made, the only question is who is gonna close? You or him?"
Either you sell this volunteer on why you can't donate or she sells you on a monthly donation. They bank on you being too embarrassed to cancel your donation (I do too btw, I know).
My personal tactic:
I ask for the information, and let them know that I want to look them up before donating any money to the organization. I want to make sure that the money is in fact going to where it says it's going to, what percentage is used as direct funds to Africa, what percentage is used to do fundraising. Basically, they can't give me enough information just on the streets and I don't have the time at this exact moment to ask all these questions.
Courteously but firmly let them know you're not signing anything right now and thank them for their effort. It's cold out and you want them to know that you appreciate their efforts and enthusiasm.
Who can argue with that? I'm an smooth-talking asshole.
We have those people here too. You just have to draw the line and say "Sorry, no" and start walking.
They are just doing their job getting your to sign your name, it doesn't mean anything to them.
Don't worry once your heart gets crushed by your first love (this is a certainty, don't think I'm joking) you will hate women for two years before you finally become a more well rounded individual. A very jaded individual, but well rounded non the less
>As for how to take control of the situation, this >quote from the Boiler Room does a great job >explaining how the world works:
>"And there is no such thing as a no sale call. A >sale is made on every call you make. Either >you sell the client some stock or he sells you a >reason he can't. Either way a sale is made, the >only question is who is gonna close? You or >him?"
This kind of reminds of that scene of that movie with Alec Baldwin, "Glengarry Glen Ross"
You feel that people wont love you if you dont do what they expect.
Point is: you dont respect yourself because you feel manipulated - and you are being manipulated!
Love yourself! Do what it takes to respect yourself! Next time ask your self: What does it take to respect myself, to love myself, to make you lasting happy? Who is important in your life if not you?
Get your shit together and just say NO!