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I have a problem with my temper which is starting to ruin my relationship. It is starting to become habit and this is causing us to drift apart. I want to get a hold of my anger problems before I destroy everything.
Does anybody have any tips on how to manage anger and remain calm? Or can anybody recommend any books or websites I can read?
I get angry over the smallest, most insignificant things and they tend to ruin my day and make me feel like a terrible person.
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>>18595901
If you're anything like me, the only thing you can do is give up on her and everything else.
There is no method, to way, no advice to reducing your temper or anger. It's you, your future and your forever.
All you can do is accept it and keep on raging. Nothing will ever help and we'll both die with deep, gnawing rage throughout our cores.
At least out of kindness, I finally managed to commit social suicide. One day I decided to just delete all forms of contact, I live secluded and alone these days, with minimal human interaction outside of 4chan. I can take my anger out on dickheads here without hurting anyone I ever cared for again.
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>>18595901
smoke or ingest cannabis indica
worked for me
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>>18596306
Jeez, that's a bit intense. I was thinking more like breathing exercises.
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Would you move out of your parent's just to be able to get sex? All these 18-22 year young girls from dating sites wanna fuck, but my 26 year loser old self lives with his parents. I do it because I'm saving up to buy a house in full with the money from my full time job. Could easily afford an apartment....but I pay no rent here, and my mom makes really good food.
If I find a girl I seriously want to date, I don't think its a problem. My personality, looks, money make them don't care that I live with my parents. Dating target age girls are usually 24-26 like me....but I really wanna smash these 18-22 year olds, but they all live with their parents.
Should I move out and get an apartment so I can get sum fuk? Pic related, I missed out on fucking this THICC 22 year old because she lives with her parents too.
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Another pic of her
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>>18595885
Buy some land, stick a trailer on it.
Buy a condo.
Done.
Seriously, houses are just a pile of maintenance for kids.
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Are you "actually" saving for a house, or do you just say that to make yourself feel better about living at home. If legit, you girl should understand, otherwise you have to get a cheap fuckshack apt.... and anything cheap will be dingy, so is "that" gonna impress her? Ignoring that you are now paying X'00 a month specifically to fuck, so how about just a prostitute; likely cheaper and better - or ultimately if the relationship goes sour, or dry, you will become bitter because you are spending this money "exclusively" to fuck her, this leads to resentment. How tiny is your house you can't just bring her over? Your parents fucked in a field in public at rock concerts... they don't care.
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Why can't I be mean to people who are ass holes to me even if they are smaller and weaker to me
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Because your weak
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You don't have to, just pass the shit tests, read up about passing these.
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>>18595870
Because you're afraid of the consequences. Being mean doesn't exist in a void so you might have to backup your words even if it's against someone smaller and weaker. Them being smaller and weaker means nothing if your barriers and self respect is also small and weak.
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Hey /adv/, I could really need your oppinion on this.
So I've met girl A (which I've never met or seen before) about a month ago. Things sorta clicked, I mean we saw each other, talked for hours, kissed, everything was and is still fine. But then Girl B "appeared", basically a girl I've known for a loooong time, but we didn't see each other for almost 8 or so years (26 year old here). We've met on rough terms, she didn't have an easy life back then, nor did I, but we reaaally got along. We were basically a couple, but since I had to move away for a job, we kinda got seperated. I changed my phone, deleted facebook (not because of her, different reasons), and we lost contact with each other. But now, there she is. The first time we saw each other again, she asked my why I wanted to see her, and I told her because I wanted to, i missed her. I told her about Girl A, that I was seeing her. Girl B then tells me some really nasty things about Girl A. Basically, what she told me, was that Girl A was seeing and hanging out with Girl B's ex-boyfriend. How did she know? Because Girl B's ex-boyfriend was still chasing her and told her that she was seeing her (maybe to make her jealous.. i dunno). Whetever that was a lie or not, I cannot tell. And that put me the fuck off, since I don't want any drama. Instead i was seeing Girl B more often. And guess what happened, things just became fucking strange around us, like we've had moments of silence.. really awkward. I slept at her place yesterday, we didn't do anything. The next morning I couldn't stand that awkwardness anymore and straight up asked her what was going on. And she replied to me "You wanted us to be friends.. and that's okay for me." When I asked her if she slept well, she said no, she had too much things going on in her head.
Like what the fuck?
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>Girl B then tells me some really nasty things about Girl A
Is suspect
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>>18595931
I woulda straight up asked Girl A about those nasty thing if it weren't for the fact that the guy mentioned is Girl B's ex-bf.. this whole situation literally screams drama.
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desu i already feel more rational today, would still like an oppinion on this. can give more info.
will actually see Girl A tomorrow and confront her about the shit Girl B said.
Hey everyone. I'm applying to minimum wage jobs, but I can't seem to get hired anywhere. I'm bilingual, good with computers, good with people, have lots of relevant work experience, but still no one will hire me. I've put out like 30 resumes and no one has even called me back for an interview. I have a reference letter, other references, I gave my work and volunteer history, I have workplace safety cert, defibrillator cert, I'm clean and presentable, etc.
I'm considering basically passing it off as I've never had a job before, since I remember when I first applied to minimum wage jobs out of high school, a ton of places wanted me, but I'm not sure. What am I doing wrong?
>pic unrelated
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>>18595858
How old are you? Any red flags on your resume (like blank years)?
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>>18595858
30 is not enough. Came back in here when you hit at least 300 applications.
I've send 50 application in the last month and I got no response at all. Endure the pain, please.
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>>18595858
Damn dude,honestly maybe it's just timing but don't let it bring you down man. And desu, 30 is too small of a number. Keep applying bro.
I feel like I'm very much homophobic. And realize its a huge personality flaw. I don't know what to do about it. I really want to start being a more accepting person of those sorts of people. I find it difficult- sometimes I can't help my initial reaction when I see those sorts of things. I try so much to be nice to gay people. And its not like I go out of my way to be mean to any of them- it's more of an internal mindset type of thing.
I understand it's not and I want to make an effort to be accepting.
What could I do to change my mind about them? Please gayanons aaccepting people and people with gay relatives reply. Thanks!
>picunrelated
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>>18595792
Its ok to be homophobic or racist as long as you're a professional at your job and you let them do their own thing in personal life.
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>>18595792
Gayanon here , most of the disgust for homos comes from shit like tv show like , my name jezz , or rupalus , or really generally shot like that and it sort of implants ideas that all gay people are fairy faggots who are special snowflakes who need to be treated special , which we all aren't some are but most aren't ,
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>>18595792
Usually the best way to normalize any uncomfortable situation is to fake it till you make it. Especially, when it's in your head. If you treat them like any other person and treat their relationships like any relationship, then eventually your mindset will start to lean towards the idea that they're just people. Of course it's easier to practice if you know some gay folks or come to contact, but it should work anyhow.
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had my dad and stepmom make an 8 hour drive to visit me recently. my dad was physically and verbally abusive to me since i was at least 10, am 22 now. my gf and i have been fighting a lot recently because she is being extra aggressive towards me, so i've been focusing on caring more for my son right now. my parents were here from thursday night to saturday morning, and on friday night my gf and i had a huge fight over intimacy more than anything. i was thinking of ways to help us at the time and even called some of her family for advice on how i could help her. when she came home from work she almost immediately starts picking a fight with me, and i'm so fed up with her shit i just start yelling at her. she keeps antagonizing me, even when i'm trying to just do something else for a while to calm down, and i ended up kicking our 18 month old son in the side because he wasn't doing what i told him to do. i feel so terrible, and i couldn't stop crying after she took him away from me. i don't know what went wrong exactly, but i can't stand being like this. my therapist doesn't teach me anything about anger, and this was a random outburst i had, the second one i've had this year (as opposed to none for a very long time). i fear for my son, and can't help but wonder why i'm like this. what can i do besides hope my therapist will help me understand what went wrong?
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>>18595784
congratulations, you're turning into your cunt dad.
seriously, get to work on the anger stuff, don't go beta emotions on your woman, and treat that kid like he's your family jewel, which he is, literally and figuratively. and fuck your parents, if they cause hassle, cut them off.
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>>18595784
Jesus your wife sounds like a cunt
bump
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Anonymous
Need more affection out of relationship? 2017-08-06 05:44:23 Post No.18595775
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Need more affection out of relationship?
Anonymous
2017-08-06 05:44:23
Post No. 18595775
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>Gf was sad yesterday over losing one of her jobs, started crying
>Comfort her, make her feel better, give her words of encouragement etc.
>She's gets into a better mood, starts laughing with me and stuff
>Going to bed that night, I try to cuddle her
>She says not to touch her
>This is the fourth night in a row she's done that
>I always listen to what she has to say and try to help her anyway I can
>Whenever I need someone to listen to or to comfort me, she's only there half the time, the other half is her saying "whatever" and not caring, even if it has to do with her
Basically, I'm giving her more affection than shes giving me. What do I do? Should I get a cat or something?
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If you feel like she's not enough for you perhaps you should break up and fine someone who is?
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>>18595775
Have you addressed this problem with her?
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>>18595775
Have you talked to her about it?
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>Start school at 32
>Community college student
>Engineering major (robotics)
>UC I was planning to attend lost their accreditation for their engineering department (or something, but no robotics program anymore) this semester
>34 now
>Can go for mechatronics at a CSU
>The A.I. aspect is really what interests me
>Considering going towards software engineering with emphasis on augmented and/or virtual reality
>Still can get my masters in robotics if I choose to
The idea is that augmented and virtual reality both have to have the computers interact with the real world much like robots do
What is the flaw in my plan? Any advice? I'd like to still go towards robotics even as a software engineer
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>start school at 32.
kys. Employers think you're a waste of time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjfClL6nogo
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>>18595816
What an asshole thing to tell someone, as if everyone has the chance to go to school when they were younger.
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>>18596083
Everyone does. Most people worked their ass off at a job or two while doing school.
If you didn't do it by 24, you're a lazy fuck.
Anonymous
How do I stop hating black people/minorities with bad reputation? 2017-08-06 05:35:36 Post No.18595750
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How do I stop hating black people/minorities with bad reputation? 2017-08-06 05:35:36 Post No.18595750
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How do I stop hating black people/minorities with bad reputation?
Anonymous
2017-08-06 05:35:36
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Completely serious. I don't hate all black people but I always get a bad first impression if someone is black. I can befriend them if they turn out to be nice people (my best friend is black) but I tend to steer clear of getting to know new black people.
How do I stop being racist?
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>>18595750
shit I thought the picture was the one talking about murdering niggers. ignore it
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>>18595750
Well, I wouldn't call you racist. You claim your best friend is black so clearly you can value black people. Maybe you're just shy? Meeting new people is "scary"
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>>18595750
> nigger , any person of any race who commits crime
> black person - no different than any other crace carry on
Anonymous
Is it possible to get a girl this attractive when she's a virgin? 2017-08-06 05:34:03 Post No.18595746
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Is it possible to get a girl this attractive when she's a virgin? 2017-08-06 05:34:03 Post No.18595746
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Is it possible to get a girl this attractive when she's a virgin?
Anonymous
2017-08-06 05:34:03
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I'm work as hard as I can but I'm not going to be wealthy until I'm at least 35-40 and that's at the earliest. Girls as attractive as the OP one have tons of suitors when they're young and I'll be old. How low are my odds?
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>>18595746
You don't have to be rich to get girls you fucking faggot. Go out on dates now or go to /r9k/
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>>18595746
Everything is possible. It is unlikely that a very attractive girl is virgin in her 20s unless she has strong moral reasons, and people with morals rarely whore themselves out to older men for their money.
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>>18595749
Are you blind bud? Of course you don't have to be rich to get girls but this girl is a 10/10. A girl that good looking has a million guys after her. To get her, you have to offer the most, I'm only 7/10 lookwise, it doesn't matter how hard I work, I can't raise my looks above that. I can only make a ton of money.
>>18595752
See above, the amount of money I earn is the only variable I can control. You're seriously criticizing me for doing everything within my power? Sounds like you're the one the moral issues.
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TL;DR Life passing my by, career and life advice?
I feel like I placed fairly well on the genetic lottery but I'm fucking it up. I'm a decent looking and fairly fit 28 year old Canadian Software Developer. Relatively intelligent, learned Japanese and Game Design in my spare time. Main hobbies are Games, Novels, and Anime.
However I screwed up High School and University. I didn't network friends at all and I'm still a virgin. Those years blew past me at breakneck pace and I found myself in a okay software developer job, but not a career. Now I feel like all those amazing experiences I enjoyed from games, books, and anime went from being possible, to no longer an option. I foolishly believed I had a chance at those fantastical scenarios and only just now realizing I have to actually be proactive about doing something with my life.
How do I decide what to do in life and in my career, how do I prioritize in what little time I have left to achieve some memorable things?
I could try to get into the games industry and maybe I would enjoy creating games but horror stories about life consuming crunch are even worse in my scenario.
I could go for a more typically software developer job, I may be bored with the day to day soulless work but I'd have more pay, time off, and time for life.
I could go for the JET program and teach English in Japan, but that has it's own horror stories and making friends and girlfriends doesn't sound easy there. Maintaining my current friends/family with the timezone difference sounds like it would fuck me too.
How do I pursue losing my virginity, a girlfriend, and a wife? Make lifelong friends? I took a look at tinder and dating sites but found my hobbies that I thought were gaining in popularity aren't really, and I'm having to sift though hundreds of people that I don't think they or I would enjoy being around.
I pissed away my youth, can I regain some of it and where can I go from here?
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I used to live by the "milestones" in life. Almost treating it like a videogame:
>oh I'll feel better when I graduate college
>I'll feel better when I have a gf
>I'll be happy after I make $100k
But guess what, there's always another milestone to hit. There is no level cap or endgame. When you treat life like a series of events to complete you realize decades just flew past you.
Life is about experiencing the moment. Be it doing something new or sharing an experience with someone or as simple as taking a moment to meditate.
Stop thinking of life as a bunch of quests to complete and take the good with the bad and love it all because you're alive. You have a short little blip to experience so soak it all in.
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>>18595739
Reading your words I can feel a sort of freshness, you are still really young (I'm 30 btw).
It is actually a good thing. You feel like you are missing something and that is not in your past, is in your present as >>18595764 correctly pointed out.
My advice is write about your past and future, this will sort your confusion and help you state out what you really want. Then you should also be able to feel motivated to go whenever you want and to get back on your feet in spite of all bad things that could happen. I say so because human interaction is a never ending confrontation and it can be draining and painful from time to time.
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>>18595854
>you are still really young (I'm 30 btw).
lmfao.
>guiz ur still really young at 40, no srsly your life is only 2/3 over but ur still young.
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She has LITERALLY gained 100 pounds in the last four years.
She blames birth control time and again. Not eating habits. Not lack of exercise. Not me.
She's literally hid her weight from me our entire relationship until yesterday when I finally caught a glimpse of the scale while she was using it.
I'm somewhat appalled.
I love her to death and we've been through it all. We started from the bottom now we're successful together.
I'd hate to say "You're fat I gotta go"
But she's literally a bit over 300 pounds now. I thought she was super hot 100 pounds ago.
Sex is phresh and all but man she's heavy!
I've even told her if it's really the bc doing it fuckin take it out, "but babies anon"
At this point I'd switch to condoms to see her lose 30 pounds. (Even though condoms fuckin suck and choke my dick into limp status)
I just don't know what to do about the situation /adv/.
Can you give me some pointers?
Side note: we have a gym membership but I just can't get her to go every day like I've been doing.
"But anon I have work later"
"It's too late I'm tired"
I feel like it's always something.
Thanks in /adv/ance.
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>>18595738
How did she hide 100 lbs?
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>>18595738
>But she's literally a bit over 300 pounds now. I thought she was super hot 100 pounds ago.
Wtf how tall is she for 200 to look normal?
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>>18595738
so are we supposed to work out your gf for you? just tell her to get fit or gtfo
So I like this girl and she liked me too a few weeks ago. I know she liked me because we nearly kissed three times. Then a story came out that she was going out with another guy. she said it was all a big joke but at the time I was uncertain what to believe. I haven't talked to her since and it turned it was all a big joke. I still really like her but I feel like we've drifted apart. Help me please. What should I do. Pic kinda related because she sent it as a meme back when we were flirting and together we do some pretty cancerous shit like quote leafy is here. Also both of us like to make fun of buzzfeed.
I posted this thread yesterday but only got one reply so I'll repost and give more info. She is a year younger than me and the other guy is a year younger than her. She and the other guy are still friends they did the joke to trick their friends. What should I do.
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>>18595735
They like each other but afraid to let on to each other so they are playing this little game and calling it a joke. As you state here they are still hanging together while you are on the outside looking in.
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>>1859575
Can I do any thing to test the waters I can do anything manipulation is NOT off the table
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>>18595807
I really think you are overthinking this whole thing OP. If you like her give it another shot, call her or text or just show up instead of hiding from her but if you thought she liked only you that was obviously wrong. If she had liked you and upset you may have misunderstood the "joke" she would have stayed in contact with you and prove to you it was a stupid joke.
That whole they are a couple thing as a joke to fuck with their friends is juvenile courtship.
Anonymous
Should I contact brother's fiance? 2017-08-06 05:04:29 Post No.18595687
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Should I contact brother's fiance?
Anonymous
2017-08-06 05:04:29
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A little backstory, my brother is also going to college but he's been brushing everything off (FASFA, choosing classes, figuring out how he's going to afford this semester) until last minute despite our warnings for months. Now classes start in 2 weeks, and he just found out he's getting very little from FASFA and can't afford to go full time, but still hasn't chosen which classes to drop and which to take. It's also tax free weekend and the last day he can get his books for less by price matching and no tax, but he's instead choosing to sleep and brush us off instead of take advantage of this. He complains about being stressed, but refuses our offers to help figure things out with him and instead goes out. He's already low on funds, and he's choosing to pay out even more by missing out on this opportunity. Obviously my brother isn't listening to us, but my dilemma is whether or not I should tell his fiance about this. He listens to her and she most likely doesn't know about this weekend and how much money it could save. They share a bank account, she works 6 days a week, and most of the money is hers. Should I tell her about this opportunity to save money, or should I stay out of it and not give her the chance to save her money?
TL;DR Brother is fucking up and there's a few hours left for him to save a good amount of money, should I inform his fiance (who produces most of the money he's going to use) about this opportunity or should I stay out of it?
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>>18595687
Yes, tell her. Don't give her the long winded rant you gave us, or it's going to come off as too critical of him and she might shut you down.
Instead, tell her about the tax free weekend and you hope your brother is going take advantage of it for school but he hasn't mentioned anything to you, so you wanted to let her in on it to make sure he knows.
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He sounds like he has greater problems than just this, he's either a pothead stoner or severely depressed. Get him some help.
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>>18595687
Holy shit he's a lazy retard.
Do not tell her. He need to fall on his face.