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>in college
>suddenly making friends
FUCK
What do I do?
how do I maintain a new friendship? Ive had the same four friends exclusively since middle school. Now I have girls and guys chatting me up as if I wasn't that same kid I was in hs
When is it okay to add someone on social media?
how do I know when someone is a friend and not just someone being friendly?
Over the years, I've conditioned myself to believe anyone being friendly to me is just doing that to make fun of me in the long run (my situation in high school) so I've been avoiding friendships this whole time but I guess it's time for a change?
general shut in to normie advice pls
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>>18575254
>how do I maintain a new friendship?
hang out with them, discuss school-related topics, listen and tell stories
>When is it okay to add someone on social media?
as soon as possible, just make sure your social media profile is presentable, by which I mean, not full of anime and memes
>anyone being friendly to me is just doing that to make fun of me in the long run
I've experienced this kind of feel, since I was socially awkward in HS to a large degree where it caused me bad physical symptoms like shaky voice, shaky hands, grouching posture, looking down while walking etc. then later on in life learned to socialize better and now I wouldn't say I am that socially awkward anymore.
I think when you are out of HS, social anxiety starts to make less sense, because people in college tend to be less of an assholes than in HS.
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>>18575254
Just be cool. Go along with whatever they want to do but don't be afraid to voice your opinion if you think it matters enough to mention. Try and find the appeal in the group activities they do that your friend group might not. Dont be afraid to drink or go camping or something that might seem a little bit too much, just judge the company you're with and trust them if theyre trustworthy.
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>>18575254
>When is it okay to add someone on social media?
When you know their name and they know yours and you say words to each other.
>go to uni
>someone adds me on fb
>"eh whatever" - accept
>starts a chain reaction and one day later everyone in my class is on my fb
Anonymous
life after parents have suffocated me 2017-07-31 07:49:01 Post No.18575215
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life after parents have suffocated me
Anonymous
2017-07-31 07:49:01
Post No. 18575215
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> I'm 22 and have never been allowed to date, drive a car, have friends over, or get a job.
>Even though I'm an adult, my parents still try to control me as much as possible.
>They actually manage that bc I wasn't allowed to do anything to make friends or become self-sufficient when I was younger and then forced me into college.
>I'm about to graduate now and I'm trying to retain my sanity through the last stretch of this bullshit.
>In the last 3 years I've been able to work one bottom-rung job behind their backs, but because of college, I couldn't make enough money for it to matter.
>I feel like I'm some kind of developmentally-stunted anomaly of a person, just one rung of dignity up from Chris Chan.
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>>18575215
Call them out on their bullshit then quick join the army or something. If its been 22 years and they still refuse to let you be independent even after passing many many semesters worth of classes (your time > their money btw) and even getting a job that you have to consider to be behind their back then you need to do something drastic.
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>>18575215
1. Your parents sound well-intentioned, but have definitely made bad parenting mistakes.
2. You need to take responsibility for your own actions.
Your parents may have restricted your actions, and although they had a position of power, you made a choice to go along with their judgment.
3. The past is in the past. From now on, you can now start to take ownership of your choices. This is what responsibility is.
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>>18575215
I'd join the armed forces, honestly. IQ tests for placement/pay grade, 4 years of experience doing almost anything that society would find valuable (like being a mechanic), free insurance for the rest of your life, and a bonus to pay off your debt. Also, free room.
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I miss my best friend's ex girlfriend and I wish we were still friends, but their break up was very emotional and I haven't seen her in about a year because of it. Just to be clear, I don't want to date her, I just want to be friends again.
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Is it sad that i pretty much dont talk to anyone more than a couple times a week.
Im lucky if i can think of something to say when hanging out with someone for an hour or two let alone everyday over and over again.
Throughout all my life I've been masturbating by rubbing against hard surfaces below me. I can't masturbate if there's not at least like 50lb of pressure on my clitoris. I started having sex and it makes my boyfriend sad because it's imposdible for me to orgasm with him.
How can I learn to have orgasms in ways that don't involve >50lb on my clitoris?
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>>18575164
Stop masturbating. Also, you can take control so that you can slam/grind as hard as you like.
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Greetings answerers and inquirers of 4Chan,
This is my first post on here and I know I may sound like a madman, but it's necessitated I give you the information to get good responses. Now idk what's been going on with me exactly as of lately, but I think I may need help. For a while now, for an x amount of years, I believe I've been hearing a seriously sinister voice in my head. At times he can be easily ignored, or temporarily "discarded," but at other times it's kind of a bitch; sometimes he's just too damn persistent. I've been contemplating the matter lately and I'm wondering whether or not it's simply my own sinful mind, but overall I'm a really nice person so idk. But now for more current matters.. So yesterday, I accidentally fell in love with a girl the same day I found out she had a boyfriend. Don't ask me how this is possible; but simply stated.. trust me.. it is. I was walking home at around 11pm last night and saw a storm brewing in the distance; man I felt like I could just accept my fate and give my life to the storm. It was such a beautiful storm though. I'm not suicidal nor am I that emotional of a person. 99% of the time I'm a serious person dedicated to my objective; I am a man of science and hard work. Anyways, I got home and started looking at methods to begin lucid dreaming for reasons kind of irrelevant to this post. This is the same time I think I'm seeing a spirit in my room occasionally; it's a figure that's white, transparent, +highly contrasted in color. It moves quickly and disappears before I look directly at it. I've been hearing noises, feeling taps on my shoulder, I've been talking to myself out loud more, and I've even been conducting science experiments on myself writing full fledged lab reports regarding them. in college my GPA is 3.9thnx to that one bitch teacher; should be 4.0.. Am I madman? I've taught myself other languages as well, + it's to my understanding that knowledge comes with a price in certain situations.
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First of all nobody wants to read your giant wall of text. Next time cut it down.
Secondly ask a therapist.
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Wrong board OP, this is some /x shit.
on the topic of a sanity check, you're basically asking if you have schizophrenia or not, and the answer is, *insufficient information*
the difference between people with schizophrenia, and 'normalcy' is 'normal' people can recognize that their internal monologue is themselves, not external to them (god, gov. surveillance, demons, etc.).
Read up on psychosis on wiki.
none of the things you've stated conclusively confirm or refute your sanity.
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Might wanna get your eyes checked by an optometrist too if youre seeing wispy shit in the corners of your vision. Stuff like that can get really bad if its left unchecked.
t. Guy who let his eyes get really bad and had to get corrective surgery
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Hey /adv/ here's my situation.
Met a girl irl and added her on facebook the following day. She never accepted the friend request.
The thing is she may not recognize me since we didnt catch each others names, i asked a friend in common for hers, and i dont have a photo of my face as my profile pic,
So, should i send her a DM telling her who i am? (even though we didnt really interact a lot), i've sent the friend request almost a week ago.
Pic unrelated
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>>18575149
I would just send a single message saying it's you. If she doesn't add you, you can take it as a sign that she's not even interested in friendship regarding you.
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>>18575149
>i dont have a photo of my face as my profile pic
Here's your problem, go do it right now OP, take a selfie and add a photo of your face as profile picture. Many people don't even add you if you don't have a normal profile picture.
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>>18575178
Not OP, but I don't add people anyways. If they want to get a hold of me and share something, I will use Wire.
My fb profile is mostly for work, and I haven't added anyone to it in over half a decade, because 30 people who like "TGIF!" and the like once every 2 weeks are all I want appearing if a potential employer wants to snoop.
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What are the chances of an ex replying to a text message of yours if it's been at least a year since you last talked?
Around this time last year, it was a bad enough breakup that she specifically stated to never see or speak to her again. And that's exactly what I've done since. But I sent a text a few minutes ago just out of curiosity.
Pic unrelated. Just needed something funny to contrast the overall serious tone.
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>>18575139
what do you hope to achieve by contacting her
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>>18575139
>what are the chances of an ex replying
does it matter? she etiher will or she wont and you already sent it, so us saying '46.2%' won't change anything. especially since we dont have context, and no just telling us what she said isn't context.
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there should really be a pinned list of /adv red flags on this board.
to state the obvious:
contacting your ex is usually a bad idea, and accomplishes nothing.
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I feel bad
Everything is ldr in here so take that into consideration
So my friend met this Japanese girl online after he broke up with his gf a month ago, he is not interested in her or anything but as she as well broke up with her ex they sort of talked about relationships and stuff including sex partners and such.
>ff 1 week
My friend introduces me to her, 2 days later and 10hours of video chatting she confesses to like me and wanna start a ldr..
I agree because I also like her. (Won't be seeing her until October and if not October only next August).
To the actual point:
My friend told me they talked about sex a lot and told me everything she told him.
To be honest it is a kind of a let down to find out I won't be her first (as she will be mine) and hearing how naughty she was with her ex..
Although she and her ex dated for about a year, I understand that it's normal for them to have sex eventually but hearing all of the other details made me real sick, kind of regret asking my friend..
Will this feeling fade or is it going to bother me until I actually meet her face to face?
That's all I can think about, she is too cute and innocent in my mind for those kind of stories I've heard..
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>>18575129
what is with americans and their obsession with virgins?
I literally never give a fuck about such trivial bullshit. If she is fine in other areas and has cut ties with her ex, just go for it
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>>18575157
I'm not American though..
I am a virgin so I guess this is why, always thought I'd have sex with my first serious gf and that I'd be her first too, I always think of sex as something really emotional and if it's the first time for both of us it's more special I guess..
The fact that she also talked to my friend about it so throughly and talked about positions and what not it's kind of bothering me as well..
Well maybe because I'm a virgin faggot that's how I think..
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>>18575129
It'll fade away.
Virginity is just like, a vague, barely important "bonus" really.
Literally no woman is going to worry whether you're virgin or not... so why should you...
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How do I motivate myself
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>>18575052
With promises of rewards.
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>>18575052
Don't rely on motivation.
Motivation ebbs and flows.
Make commitments, and live by those commitments.
>>18575068
Rewards will help reinforce good behavior.
>gag reflex and almost vomit every morning when washing teeth
>no problem whatsoever in the evening
What causes this and how do I fix it?
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Try swishing and drinking some water before you go in for the brush in the morning. (I'd do it in the evening too honestly)
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>>18575000
Make a fist with your thumb inside and squeeze. Somehow helps suppressing your gag reflex
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Which one? Bitcoin or Ethereum ?
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>>18574951
30% cash, 30% bitcoin, 30% etherum and 10% heroin.
It will be a wild ride op!
>>>/biz/
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>>18575779
This except 10% in Apple stock
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>>18575803
>buying stock of super inflated company whose only leader died and they have nowhere to go but down
If anything, you want something almost dead and cheap like nokia.
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Hey /adv/, so im going to be a senior in highschool and i dont know what to do anymore. I have 4 older brothers and they have all had a perfect 4.0 gpa thier whole lives. My grades, on the other hand, have been complete shit all through highschool. Im reminded by my parents on a daily basis about how im not as good as my brothers and i can see the dissapointment in my parent's eyes. Everbody in my life is so successful and i dont think i can keep up with them. What should i do?
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Go to college out of state and live your life out of your brothers' shadows and your parents' comparisons and expectations. It's your life to live, not theirs. Perfect grades aren't everything, just do your best dude.
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>>18574729
Grades do not correlate to success. Here's what you are responsible for before a wife/kids: your happiness. That's it. Jobs aren't happiness. Jobs are a means to happiness. You take the best paying job that you can manage to stomach, and pursue happiness in your free time.
I had a 4.0 GPA in all honors class, and couldn't stand college. Wound up dropping out and joining an apprenticeship to be an electrician. I don't love being an electrician, but I liked it a hell a lot more than paying tens of thousands of dollars to spend 4 years of my youth (the most valuable time in my life) in a classroom, without a guarantee of employment afterwards.
Now, I'm not rich, but I'm more than comfortable, and my job can't be exported. Electricians are needed on-site. Ditto for plumbers, welders, etc.
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>>18574729
The world will always need plumbers. Also electricians, bus drivers, barbers, postmen, truck drivers, factory workers, firemen, cops, retail clerks, etc, etc, etc.
All honorable and well-paying professions
hey, I work in marketing and advertising. How do I deal with rejection better?
Sometimes you get the gig, sometimes you don't. It is life. But I always take it personally for a few hours afterward and feel angry.
Same with rejections from women. Even though in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter.
>How do I not be angry when told no?
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>>18574574
I listen to a podcast called "Philosophize This" from time to time.
On the episode about the Buddha, the speaker said something to the effect of
>Siddhartha (Buddha's IRL name) believed that negative emotions come from expectations. Say you're in line at the grocery store, and someone bumps into you. Most people would say this is a negative experience, but only because they expect to get their shopping done without any disturbances. Someone who wants to work on standing up for themselves or their public speaking skills might be delighted that someone bumped into them because it lets that person pursue a goal.
I find that when someone at my retail job pisses me off, I immediately calm down by thinking about this. Not that I think, "Oh I work in retail I should expect worse," but I actually think, "The only reason I'm upset is that I expected that person to be nice / my manager to not be a cunt." I dunno, it works for me. I've never gotten hung up over people rejecting me when I try to sell them memberships, though.
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>>18575518
Tl;dr
People suck ass, if they don't say yes then they're retarded faggots who don't see a great investment (you!) because their eyes are filled with cocks
Everything happens for a reason, fuck people.
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>be me
>kissless virgin, ugly as fuck and been told this online and IRL,never had a girl interested in me, never asked a girl out
>have not had friends since I was 12 or 13 years old
>go through high school a friendless loser, carries over to college because I don't know how to be any different, miserable loser in college
>have a meh GPA, don't know how to network at all because of no social media
>living with parents (don't really mind this tho)
>the life of complete social isolation and misery means I have no hope in anything anymore and have no reason to even try for anything in life
>went to a therapist a couple of months ago, never went again because I felt like she was judging me
>getting angry at women when I see them with other men due to how easy it must be for them and knowing I'll never compete
>and to top it all off I can only masturbate to fucking cuckold pornography now due to a massive inferiority complex
>literally 20 years old but can see myself living like this for a decade straight
Not having friends kills any motivation you could ever want to do anything in life. Every damn thing. Even if a girl did show interest in me now and straight up said she wanted to have sex, I would surely reject or ignore her out of fear about my lack of experience. I probably wouldn't even want to hang out with people because I would have no clue how to act with them.
I don't even know if it's possible for therapy, medication, anything to fix me at this point but if I could, how could I fix all of these /adv/?
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>>18574453
Therapy could help you a lot, I suggest you give it another go. Maybe this time you get a therapist you click better with.
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My life has turned into a big mess. First off I think my biggest problem is I'm a chronic liar. I almost finished high school with my associates in arts and only need one credit in math to get (which my parents think I did). Now I'm taking bachelors classes and the first semester went great so I signed up in spring did maybe one week of work then stopped going and doing work altogether. In my situation doing online I cannot be dropped from classes for not attending and I didn't make an effort to drop them and ended up failing 5 then in summer same thing now. I'm 100% sure in fall they aren't going to let me sign up for shit. The school signed me up to talk to a lady (about how I was going to schedule and do my work during summer) and I lied to her and didn't have the balls to follow up with her after lying the first time. Now I'm pretty sure me dad is going to find out and freak and I'm pretty fucking nervous. I've become such a loser I don't know what to do. There is no way I am going to tell them though that's for sure. I know I'm in college now and they have no involvement anymore but still I'm sure I'm going to get another letter for academic affairs which I've received several. What can I do? I don't think my mom cares as much but I feel like such a disappointment despite doing ok in highschool I don't really feel like college is necessary but I have no drive or ambition to do anything. I currently work full time and make good money but nothing I could support myself on I wish I could move on but I feel like a manchild still even at 19.
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>>18574193
I'm 23 and basically restarting college after dropping out at 20. All I can say is just go. Just get that stupid degree so you have it. It is retarded but that is what needs to be done. All you can do is retake the classes so you can get a better grade than an f in them.
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>>18575028
>26 and doin' nothing over here
You guys got plenty of time, you're not irreparable fuckups yet. Patience and understanding with yourself is the greatest boon you can afford yourself
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>>18575032
I'm figuring that 30 is the cutoff that if I'm not doing anything then in done for.