Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2667. page

>she says
Doesnt matter, she's obviously into you. Anything that involves you spending time together will be perfect.
Since it's valentines day a lot of cliche shit might not be a great idea. Things like the Zoo, dinner, etc, will be very crowded.

Can you cook? Do you have similar taste in media? Is there anything both of you particularly enjoy as a hobby?

OP here, later that night as we were at a diner after drunk shenanigans we were looking at that horoscope shit. She was looking at her sign, pointed out that her matched marriage sign was a Gemini, which I am, and smiled at me.

>>18001262
We both cook, talk frequently about food
Most of our food outings weren't "let's be together and use food as an excuse", it's more "we both really want this particular restaurant let's go get this food that we've been fantasizing about"
We both like similar movies.
Tbh I don't think she has many hobbies apart from drawing and cooking. She brought up rock climbing though.

>>18001305
Think of something simple but pleasant to cook for her and watch a good movie together. Include wine or preferred alcohol.
I'm assuming you wouldn't be opposed to something happening with this chick, so try not to sit away from her or intentionally de-escalate the situation. She was the one who invited the idea so if she feels like you're getting the wrong idea she'll probably make that clear, you sound like good friends.

>>18001203
>but he's proposed an open relationship
abandon ship and abort mission
repeat
abandon ship and abort mission

i know the feel of throwing away many years of investment, and the feel of someone bamboozling you for an extended period of time by pretending to be something they are not (and the personal embarrassment of falling for it for so long). it sucks. but the sooner you gtfo, the sooner you can begin to move on.

>>18001220

This man means everything to me. He's the only person in the world that understands me. He's so funny, and kind, and we're so alike in every single way but this. I'm trying to be understanding, I know men have a biological urge to 'spread their seed', but I wish I was enough for him. I can't just jump ship, he's my everything and without him I have no family or friends of my own. I'd literally be living on the streets, and who could love me then? I'd rather come to terms with an open relationship, but I don't know how to curb my jealousy and fear.

Perhaps propose threesomes, I don't know if you're into women but regardless, he'll be able to try new women but you'll be able to get in on it too without being left out. Plus if you do it with a different woman every time you won't have to worry about him getting too attached to someone else. That's the best scenario I can come up with.

Honestly though, unless this is just a phase for him, your relationship could be tough to hold onto. He hasn't proposed in 7 years? That's not a good sign.

Honestly that was my only idea, your situation sucks ass and I wish you the best.

>>18001192

assuming you already did 'the basics' there's nothing we can say. tell us what you already do and that'll narrow it down

Plant a fruit tree

>>18001192
as an intellectual activity, learn philosophy and some branch of it
in practical terms, learn something technical. say, to fix computerscellphones/whatever.

how old are you?

>>18001137
Low T and/or serotonin

>>18001137

do you masturbate?

>>18001140
I'm 25. What are things I could do to ameliorate this?

Thanks!

>>18001115
Solid fucking advice you should have written a little before Christmas. Then I wouldn't suffer right now how bow dah

I agree with all this except the 'captain' bit. I agree that women like a man with a plan but I think subjegating women is pretty stupid.

>>18001029
>Can losers ever become happy, confident, successful people?

Calling yourself a "loser" isn't helping anything. You are what you do. So do stuff to be happy.

>>18001029
Thanks for making this thread. I spend half an hour and about 400 words trying to say something similar but it didn't make sense.

I just want to be someone else because I can't escape who I am and have been for 26 years. If I was someone else at least I would have what it takes to work up from nothing.

>>18001063

As I said above, you are what you do. If you keep wallowing in regret, you'll be stuck. If you move on, you can grow.

>>18001026
>However I do not know how to cross the boundary from professor->friend->lover.
You don't because you could be fired for it and good luck having a successful career after that.

>>18001035
Yep /thread but I don't think its considered immoral to go out with a former student you'll never teach again so check that possibility out. I don't mean you should groom girls to want to have sex with you because you'll eventually take it too far but maybe if you meet some chick at a bar randomly and it happens thats ok.

I think I read about some recent Basketball coach was a noted poonhound who had sex with many college girls and it wasn't technically wrong but he lost a lot of recruits over it.

>>18001026
>professor
lol you're an equivalent of PhD student

Also how did you get to teach with a Master?
In every uni I know of you would need at least a PhD. A PhD student is a TA at most.

She's the women eating a side salad from McDonalds with a diet coke.

By back to you, I wouldn't worry about it. She might just prefer an open and relaxed environment as opposed to an intimate, 4 person dinner, since its the first time ur meeting them. She also might not want you to cook just to avoid the hassle. Don't take it personal.

>>18000987
I've met this girl a handful of times. She and her husband were at my wedding to my husband 8 months ago...
She also knows I'm an avid cook...

What the fuck

>>18000954

remember that a rejection isn't a judgement of you as a whole, its just a girl deciding if you're a match or not. plenty of amazingly hot alpha chad guys get rejected all the time, arguably more than betas to be honest, because they ask more girls out. they realize that there is nothing wrong with getting a 'no'. they know it doesn't make them ugly or sad or creepy or losers. it just means the girl didnt get that special feeling. and that doesn't speak more or less of a person, at all.

all that being said, if you find yourself continually setting yourself up for dissapointment, cosnider why. its not nice to realize one might be ugly or have some other glaring flaw, but that doesn't make you a bad person or a lesser person, its just part of the hand you've been dealt.

even if you are ugly, you can still date, you just wont likely get an attractive partner. its dissappointing but once you realize that it means you know the person you're with loves you for who you are instead of how you look, it can be extremely freeing.

if you want our help, start by posting a picture of yourself. thats the first impression, thats where we start, and we work our way deeper from there. if you can't do that, there isnt much we can do to help you

Know that no one "deserves" anyone. A person just tries to spend time with another person in hopes that that person wants to do the same thing with the other.

Also, you never know until you try.

>>18000954
>how can I get over this
By becoming a man that is worthy of her. You need some willpower to get yourself in shape, get on a path to a proper sustainable career, clean up your look and force yourself into social situations so you learn how to act. It's embarrassing at first, but a necessary step to becoming an attractive human being.

You should be doing all these things for your own sake, women are attracted to success and drive, but if you don't have enough desire to better yourself for betterment sake, do it so you become the person she would be attracted to.

You can't help her. She needs to want to walk away from this shit life. As for the drinking, she needs to realize she's got a problem and want to get help. Otherwise there's nothing you can do, OP.

>>18000953
I know I should, but I've fallen for her hard. Like, after we fucked the first time she told me that she thinks I might be a better boyfriend than her current one

>>18000930

Oh boy. I can't wait for reality to catch up with your stupid ass. Have fun, my naive man!

>>18000915
You sound autistic

>>18000915
>I could have asked her for two minutes, tell her I think she's really pretty and that I would love to take a coffee with her and talk about random shit, maybe if she likes, ask her phone.

And she would probably have said "no". This is the least efficient way to get dates, OP. You didn't miss on much.

I'm sure someone will show up saying "I got a date asking out a girl at the bus stop!!!". Whatever. It usually doesn't work. Don't even bother.

kinda similar to the OP, but I've got girls stare at me, say, at the bus/subway/whatever...
how would one go about talking to random girls in the street? I'm an aspie and I have no clue what to do... ask her phone # and what else?

also... this has happened twice:
>ask her phone
>"no, I won't give you my phone" (thinking I asked for the device instead of the number)
some girls are just dumb

>It usually doesn't work. Don't even bother.
and what if it does?

In the days that I don't fap, I noticed that I'm usually busy with stuff and occupied most of the time. When I do fap I've noticed that I'll just be on YouTube or playing video games

>>18000868

get rid of internet in your bedroom. most fapping is brought on by porn.

if its not, get rid of the door on your bedroom. no privacy = no fap.

and if you still fap, WILLPOWER.

>>18000868
Stop browsing 4chan. Everytime I'm on here, it usually ends in me beating off.

>>18000836

in my experience flirting is not the way to start a "relationship" - flirting is the way to find fuck buddies

>>18000844
Checked. But yeah that's the intentions.

>>18000836
obviously you flake out and get on 4chan

I would search California online obituaries or just suicide articles and see if any match her description. I've always been afraid of this, I too have an online friend who has attempted suicide a few times. I wish you the best of luck.

>>18000847
thank you

>>18000857
No problem, I hope she's alright senpai.

please respond

>>18000820
only pussies cry on 4chan about girls you fucking pussy

>>18000820
Lmfao