Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 2586. page

>>18026253

If you want something you want it. End of story.

I had one of those OP. She was great when I could just joke about shit without worrying about offending her like 99% of women, but terrible when I realized how dependent and needy she was.

There's nothing wrong for wanting one, most normies cant hold a conversation for their life and their interests are as bland as cardboard. Browsing 4chins isn't going to get you a gf though, just a gf(male) or some mentally unstable chick, and yore better off single. And this is coming from a NEET femanon.

A girl I've known for 6 months, but whom I've been dating for 3–how much should I spend on a valentines day gift?

I want to get her a ring–nothing too fancy. How much should I spend?

This is keeping I'm mind that when I asked her what she wanted, she said she doesn't want anything, just a flower and maybe some candy. But I really want to get something special for her. I love this girl. But I also don't make a lot of money–being a student and working part time minimum wage jobs.

So how much would be appropriate to spend?

Why do girls give such conflicting signals that make it impossible to know if they're interested or not?

>>18026243
I usually get a giant stuffed animal, and truth be told I never ask for anything, but I love receiving a huge cuddly bear. You can never go wrong with that and I'm sure all females feel the same. I think a ring would be too soon, even if it wasn't for engagement. If you want something meaningful I'd get her a necklace, something she can always wear but not feel weird about. Money doesn't matter to girls unless they're gold diggers or materialistic tbqh you could just get her a card and she would be overjoyed you even thought of her.

>>18026249
Girls overthink things a lot, she probably had a shitty ex who makes her second guess everything. The more you talk to her the more she'll open up I guarantee

>>18026165
Nah, if she's comfortable enough with you to smoke a bowl with you after work, it'll happen again. It'll happen again! What's there to worry about? She says she hasn't been in a relationship for 3 years, clearly it's not like if you didn't ask her out yesterday you lost your chance. You're still in it, just try next time. Ask her to come over, or go over to her place, or whatever, make small steps and then make your move. Good luck.

>>18026165
Sounds like she likes you and the two of you get along really well. You didn't miss your chance. Just ask her out soon, because if you wait too long you will actually miss your chance.

>>18026208
>it'll happen again. It'll happen again
Well, we've smoke a few times. Two nights ago we were going to but she never went outside, and last night she got mad (not angry, just like "haha, i'm mad") at me and said "make sure you wait for me this time!!"

Also, I checked the schedule and we don't work together for a few more days. I don't want to ask her to hang out over phone, but maybe it's my only chance? idk.

It's so weird. I feel really comfortable around her, even more comfortable than all of my previous serious relationships. Why the fuck do I get so awkward and choke up? The only time I feel just uncomfortable is when she tries to trick me into saying I like her (I always change the subject). Yesterday she was like "you're normally really quiet when you're high, but you've been talking this whole time. Why is that?"

I wanted to say "it's because you're the only person I actually like talking to here, you're probably the most chill person I know." But what I said was "uh...maybe its cus...uh, I'm smoking a cigarette? Yeah, that" then she just laughed and said "ok"

Then I started getting really awkward and quiet, so maybe she jinxed it? :(

Also, would it be a bad idea to talk to one of my coworkers about this? Saying something like "oh, so has annonette ever said anything about me?" Our manager is a really nice person and I've talked to her about anxiety and stuff before.

>>18026054
Ask her to go to a doctor and have blood tests. Tell her that sex isn't everything, but it is something, and it is possible that she has a low sex drive because of some deficiency.

Better to do this now, mate of mine just broke up from a 10 year relationship because they never ironed out this problem in the early days.

>>18026101
I can't think of a way to kindly put that, I'm afraid she'd take it as me saying there's something wrong with her.

>>18026054
Get better so she likes it

>unemployment requires that I apply for 3 jobs a week
That's awesome! Hand-ups, not hand-outs!

Find a way to make your dreads look business appropriate, cut it off, or start looking for more hands-on or blue collar work. You aren't in unemployment to be picky. You're in it to not get kicked out of your living space.

>>18026027
is it just me or is that pic supposed to look like there's a fucking planet in the sky.

anyways, um just apply for jobs you're under qualified for. Is that not the obvious answer? Plus what's wrong with working in more of a blue collar or service setting? You might not be as well payed, you might need to down size a bit, but you'll be on your feet. idk best of luck anon. Don't loose the dreads, but loose the dread, y'know?

>>18026043
The least you could do is actually read my post and understand that I'm trying to save both myself and employers hassle.

Also, that conservative cockamamie bullshit doesn't work.

http://99percentinvisible.org/episode/magic-bureaucrat-riverside-miracle/

"Get a job any job" programs invariably fail compared to "we'll support you while you get training" programs.

Be glad for the time you got to spend with her.

Now imagine that she's dead and go on with your life. Sounds harsh but you're gonna suffer more if you keep thinking about her.
And yes, you can stop thinking about her. Just try hard.

>>18025658
you're fucking stupid. If she could cheat on her bf with you, she'd be able to cheat on you with another dude, and yet you still want her?

if I were you, I'd just send her bf everything you've done together, ruin her life, and then move on with yours

>>18025667
I hope I can get out of this as soon as possible. Can't believe my first love is a girl cheating.

>>18025671
I gave her my word and she trusted me on not spreading any pictures I took between us. I don't want to hurt her.

You need to be careful, that's not a good sign. Take this from someone who's been with women like that. They need to test you, to know you're in a constant state of anxiety like they are. It's fucked. Be careful bro

Just dump her now if she's going to play these high school games.

>>18025427
>>18025434

Yeah this. I knew a 14 year old that wouldn't do that sorta thing.

Tell her to cut the crap.
Or dump.

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Well from an outside experience looks like she's cheating on you. You're probably on denial.

Can you ask her that without going into an argument? Oh fuck no. Plus she'll make it look like it's not her fault or whatever. Just meditate over it wheter you wanna stay with someone who will most likely cheat on you again or not.

Believe it or not, there's more people out there. And a lot of them do factor your feelings into their equations.

Best of luck.

>>18025161
Have you cheated on her? I would put my investigation hat on if I were you. Your instinct is probably right. You don't trust her..,,and that is a conversation you need to have with her. She needs to earn your trust again....obviously you guys aren't really focused on the relationship. Maybe she wants an open relationship. Would you be ok with that?

>>18025161
Don't ask your girlfriend anything. Call her mom and ask her to talk to your girlfriend. If she actually is with her mom, just tell her you tried to call and it didn't work.
If she isn't, dump her. Move on with your life.

Not in my case.

The advice givers I know seems to have learned a lot from failure and ruminating on problems. There might even be an inverse relationship.

you know the saying that some people can dish it out but can't take it?

its like that, only with advice

some people are really good at dishing out solid advice, but can never follow their own advice either.

so you take this board with a grain of salt

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TLDR
>haven't had sex in over a year
>at college girl in class flirting hard
>attracted to her only because she has a vagina and isn't objectionably ugly

Do I ask her out or no?

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Helpful reference of where I got rating of 5.5 from

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Bumping with doggo
Any advice would be helpful my friends

No, as long as you're not tricking anyone into knocking you up. Like, don't poke holes in the condom or say you're on the pill when you're not.

>>18027772
Then how the hell am I going to have a baby? Apparently they won't be happy if they find out my wish. Tricking them maybe the only choice. I don't need their child support or any sort of it.

>For your information I have trouble with finding love, I'm 26 now and never have a long term relationship.
If you aren't stable enough for a LTR are you stable enough for a child? Any child you have is going to learn from you how to interact with their peers. How to form relationships with friends, family, and lovers, as modeled by you. If you're just going around having one night stands, and unable to find people in your life who you can actually keep in your life, should you have a child?

You're not in a good position to raise a child, on your own or with someone else. Work on identifying and fixing whatever's going on that's stopping you from being able to form attachments/keep relationships going.

>>18027749
that's probably good, man. I've been with the girls who don't care if you're carless, and you don't want to deal with them. just get a damned car.

>>18027756
Yeah but how do i get girls without a car shits expensive all i have is $60 atm and im helping my mom pay rent so money is really tight

>>18027766
I'm going to say stop listening to what 4chan says and, ideally, stop posting here too. you say you're 18, but you post like you're about 16, and even if you're telling the truth I figure you're probably being overly influenced by depressive shitposting here.
just relax and stop listening to what shitheads say. this will seem utterly trivial when you're a few years older as long as you don't do anything stupid now.
who cares if you don't have a girlfriend right now? you say you've had one before, so you're obviously not fucked up socially. people have gone for years without a girlfriend and not died. the rest is just numbers, you'll get it right eventually.

girls enjoy male attention

>>18027736
>wut she meen by this

Shes stringing you along because she likes attention and playing games. You are likely not the only one shes doing this to.

>>18027729
yall are gross but it sounds minor. sure this thing isn't traditionally loyal, but it's not cheating. it's not like anybody's genetics/spermoids are going to be transmitted through the internet.

>>18027731
True, but obviously there are issues with the relationship that needs to be addressed. So would you go through her phone or not?

>>18027734
>go through her phone
man why do you think that is a good idea

Thats pretty fucked up. Tell her the truth and apologize. Then download a dating app in your own country if you really want a relationship.

>>18027723
You're pathetic and possibly beyond help. Hopefully you'll delete the apps and use your phone to make an appointment with a psychiatrist

>>18027757
I honestly didn't think I'd get a single match...I was just messing around. At first I kept going with it because I thought eh, she'd get tired of me quickly but she's noticeably falling for me now. I don't want to lose this opportunity now either :/
I live in a rural area here so it's hard to find a relationship as it is. Think a town with ~1000 people. (mostly old people). Plus I find women from her country to be very pretty too.

>>18027768
I know