Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 21. page

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I cant finish during intercourse cuz my arousals all fucked up from depersonalization caused by sexual coersion.

I dont feel part of life

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I'm a certified moron that married his unstable hippie girlfriend so that she could stay stateside. I didn't think we'd last forever, I just thought we could hack two years and she deserved to have a chance (she's boned back home).

She hasn't done any dramatic evil stuff. But she's become increasingly unpleasant and dogmatic in the time before and after the wedding, and I can really see moving in with her lowering my quality of life.

What are the logistics/tips/tricks (United States, NY) of breaking it off?

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Okay, for real, how do I stop jacking off to porn when I have my gf? I want to stop but keep being drawn back to it then feel guilt afterwards. I do so when we're in calls and she's asleep (long-distant atm). I actually fucking hate myself when I do and it kills me when she found out and felt like she wasn't good enough which DEFINITELY is not the case. I jack off more to her than I do porn but it's a problem. What do?

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I can't get girls to respond to me at all. I've beaten myself up over it my whole life. I've had a couple relationships but they were a disaster and i've been single for 8 or so years.

I've tried online dating but nobody ever responds, when I look over and smile at women they immediately turn away.

I was so desperate last weekend I went to a strip club and couldn't get anyone to even talk to me. I wish I smelled bad, that would make sense.. but these girls would be all over some of the most grimiest dudes you've ever seen, but wouldn't even talk to me.

What do people do, just forget about it and then it magically happens?

It's not happening, or i'm not lucky enough to forget about it

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> work at a shit tier tech company for 2 years
> mediocre pay, shit managers, shittier culture
> but i like my coworkers a lot and we hang out regularly
> fast forward 2 years
> get a new job
> objectively better in every way
> pay is almost doubling, my manager seems super chill and on top of things, culture is great
> but i just feel depressed as fuck sitting at my new fancy electric sit/standing desk
> i miss playing foosball with them
> i miss cracking the same bad jokes every day
> i feel stressed out going through onboarding stuff
> in my turbulent emotional state i hit up one of my former coworkers and pretty much ask her out
> she got a bf in the past 2 weeks
> things are awkward between us now
> become even more of an emotional ball

i didn't know switching to a new job can trigger such an emotional reaction, but it did and i feel really sad and lonely. has anyone experienced this before?

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What's the point of it all

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I am a bit at my wit's end. I haven't had a girlfriend in over a year. The dating apps haven't helped either. There was this one girl I matched with on tinder back in May but after 3 dates, she got the impression that I wanted something serious.

It was never outright said, and I get that I can give off vibes that I'm unaware of but I really understood it was literally date 3. I wasn't asking her to even meet my friends at that point.

This most recent girl, I met through mutual friends. Again, 3 dates. I haven't heard from her in about a week, so I can put 2 and 2 together. This is really unlike her cause she's such a good communicator.

But I'm at a loss for what I can do. The thing is, I have been told by many many many many people (not just guys, not just girls) that I'm handsome. I lift on a regular basis; I watch what I eat.

I have a stable career and am making decent money. (Live in a 1 bed room in a busy city) Have my own car.

I have hobbies(improv classes, acting classes). I even have a talent agent that represents me and while I used to get a decent amount of commercial work, things have dried up recently. I get auditions for cool shit but haven't booked a speaking role in years.

What the fuck am I doing wrong?

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So, i am a kind of weird sexual fetish and i cant seem to think of a way to sate it.

I really want my wife to have a fun D/s realtionship with a guy on skype, taking pics, setting rules around our sex life.

The best i can refer it to is an "e-cuck" fetish. We found one guy who worked out a little bit, but he kept breaking what limited rules there were and then it got bad for everyone after a few months.

Id like to find another person, but both me and her are hesitant after the past failure, and i can not find anyone who would make a good fit.

ive chatted with people on various boards and sites. no luck yet. any tips ?

pic unrelated,

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I had a moment of clarity today, I went around trying to talk to girls and failed as usual but I noticed very clearly it seems like i'm doing the same thing they are, afraid of rejection so putting up a wall, waiting for them to talk first, if I end up talking first, I keep expecting them to show interest first... it just felt like I was doing exactly what they were doing and I could tell in an instant thats why I'm not getting anywhere.

I haven't the slightest idea where to go from here though. Suggesties?

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That is interested in an honest talk I'm really on the edge contemplating if Leaving Las Vegas character Ben, displays a person that suffers of borderline personality disorder.

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what should I do about my under the belt hair? I want to shave my butt but I am unsure if I should shave the backside of my legs too? or should I have it all nice and trimmed with a smooth butt?

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just moved into a town ive never lived in before and know nobody. recently out of a 3 year relationship, need to meet women, and I also need a job.

Do I work at a ski resort in town, or at a sandwich shop in town?

Ski place:
Pros
-Ski resort will give me a free ski pass for the season (~$600)
-Huge discounts on gear
-Possibly meet a lot of people

Cons
-I dont know how the fuck to ski/snowboard
-heard the place doesnt treat employees too well
-id have to wake up suuuuper early and go to work even if its a gnarly fucking snow storm
-its for sure seasonal and id be out of a job when the snow goes away

Sandwich shop:
Pros
-I worked at a sandwich shop for 3 years at the end of high school, its easy as fuck, i know id be able to do well/tolerate it while i live here and i enjoy the tight knit crew relationships
- been in there a few times and holy fuck id be working with a bunch of beautiful women my age and listening to cool music all day
-from experience, its quite easy to dip the pen in company ink in that setting
-probably more flexible with my school schedule

Cons
-id be working in fucking food again and dont enjoy sucking asshole customers dicks all day with a smile on my face
-id have to pay for my ski pass/lessons/gear on a sandwich makers salary
-would meet far fewer people than at the ski resort

im basically guaranteed a job at either place, pay isnt too relevant as Im living with my parents while i finish school here and dont have very many bills, but the ski place will for sure be minimum wage and im sure the sandwich place will be close to that as well

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I'm pretty sure there are plenty of people here with this problem, but it's affecting my everyday life.

To start out, I've always had this fear of death. I mean, debilitating fear. I guess it started around middle school (22 now). Every time I would think about my future, I would think about growing old, and then start to think about death. Usually it just made me uneasy, but often times I would start getting tunnel vision. My heart would start racing, and I would feel like I can't breathe. This would happen out of nowhere if I just started to daydream or imagine anything. I just sort of learned to get over it and ignore it.

Come about two weeks ago, my grandfather passed away, whom I was really close to. Now ever since, I think about death every day, almost every hour. I know death is just part of life, but it's really putting a strain on my everyday life. I can't focus on school work or my job. I can't even focus on my hobbies anymore, as I'll just start hyperventilating and freak out. I feel like I'm on this miniscule time limit that will shut my conscious off. Reality just seems surreal to me now, and fake. I just don't know if I should just continue to ignore it, or should I seek some sort of help.

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God I'm so awkward at social interactions. I'm at my friend's graduation ceremony and when I sat next to my friends it didn't even occur to me to say hello to their parents that are sitting right in front of me. Now it's too late! It was pretty rude right? How do I fix this? I'm thinking about saying something like "hey sorry I didn't properly greet you when I arrived" when the ceremony ends. Good enough?

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So labor day weekend was the first time in a while that I had been able to go out with friends [been in basic training]. We went drinking and I drank a lot of vodka in a short time, but I was feeling alright. Next day I was feeling fine, smoked a few cigs in one sitting nothing crazy. Its Wednesday now and I'm just feeling off and I was throwing up yesterday morning. I have a disoriented feel. Is this from the weekend or am I possibly sick?