Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1685. page

>>18299964
What got you down anon?
I'm here for you, elaborate

I havent been happy for long time. I faked being happy.

It is that i dont have a gf nor have no idea wtf im going to do. Im fat no close friends to talk to. People are cynical to me. I still try to seem happy while feeling like i have no purpose. Tried to hide it with video games but im too depressed to even play them. Also last post was mine

>>18299958
Don't look for problems where there are none. It doesn't bother him.

But if it does bother you - for yourself, not for him - remember that the last 10 pounds are the hardest to lose. Your best bet is a slow fitness programme. Just skip one fast-food meal a week, do a little more exercise, and you should be able to lose a pound a week - and at that rate (as opposed to crash diets) it is likely to stay off.

>>18299958
>2 kids (20 mo and 6 mo). Both work.

Aren't there laws against that?

i don't think any decent husband would expect your body to look the same after giving birth to to kids.
anyways, your body needs 6 (!!!!!!) years to completely recover from a pregnancy. ofc that is the last bit, you will feel normal again way sooner. it's recommended to not exercise for 6 months after birth, so you can now start again. but the problem isn't really excess fat as it sounds, so exercising might not help. you can get a waist trainer, which helps the area to tighten up again. it also prevents the skin to hang down and tear, which will make it saggier. do body wraps. (hust use a firmy cream, wrap the area with ceran wrap and sleep like that).
ofc you should definitely est healthy and exercise. but lose skin just takes a god damn while to become firmer again, if it ever does completely...
if you also have fat to lose, you know what to do. consume less cals than you need and the weight will go down.
starting out small is better than procrastinating till "next break". that will never happen. pack up your kids and go for a walk. take them to the pool, ask grandma to babysitt and go for one of those courses designed to help reform your uterus (which is still stretched out, iow needs more space than normal), your abs (who got oushed to the side and stretched to oblivion, they will snap back, too), and do kegels.

you'll be fine. don't stress over it. you're not 16 anymore, you had two kids. talk to your husband if you need support.

>>18299946
>Narotic
ASMR

Bump
So I want to know what it causes, not that i have any problems with that, its just interesting to know and maybe I am not alone with it or someone is smarth enough to tell.

>>18299948
I do know asmr, but how did you come up with that?

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I've only dated 1 girl from high school. We were together for 4 years. Never truthfully went out on many dates per se. During college, I hooked up with 2 more girls. More like a nightstands.
This might as well be my first date ever assuming it's a date. what if she wants to hook up? A girl like that makes me nervous lol did I say she is a solid 10?
All my insecurities about my weight/looks are heightened now.
I've never been so freaked out by a girl before lol

>>18299942
Yes, it is a "potential girlfriend date" and yes, that is scary - especially when it seems to have happened to you without your getting much of a vote.

But that may have been exactly what you needed - someone to push you into what you wouldn't have had the nerve to do yourself.

Remember that in your age bracket most people (especially women) have moved past judging people purely by appearance, and respond to the person inside. So while you think you're just a 5 on the outside, she evidently sees something attractive in your character.

Not a whole loot is expected of you on a first date - just try to have a good time in her company. If you have a good time, she'll have a good time, and then both of you will know if you want a second date.

>>18299942
Stop talking and thinking nonsence, buy condoms and DATE THE BITCH!

Also
>cant come home drunk
ofc you can. Who cares if your mommy will spank you, you will soon be getting married and moving out with your new gf anyway.

Really just stop thinking, hang out with the girl, exchange numbers with her and 18 hours after end of first date ask her on another.

Good luck op!

>>18299931
Sound like a lot of hormones. You two have a lot going on and he has a lot to think about. If you can, try going to counseling together. Its natural for pregnant girls to be tempted to shit test their partners. You just need to learn to motivate him in healthy ways. Counseling can do that.

>>18299931
>I f playing vidya is really worth never getting to know his child (i'm pregnant... ).
>I'm pregnant
/thread. No but really just try to recognise when you start this behaviour, it doesn't seem too bad as you're just trying to look out for him but the reason you feel so emotional about it during and after (when you make the post) is what your hormones do to you. Also you shouldn't doubt yourself when you have good reason to be concerned, nobody wants their or their spouses testicles offed.

>>18299983
>>18299994
yeah, i'm aware that being pregnant is probably the reason. but i am alao not sure if you can say that it's all hormones and overreacting. for example, i want him to take care of hinself ao that my kid doesn't have to gros up without his dad. i want him to pick up after himself so he's a good rolemodel for the kid and so i don't have unnecessary additional chores to do. i'll have enough work with the baby, soon...
i want him to not depend on his mom for stuff like his taxes because one day we will have to teach our child and he can't let mommy fix everything for him forever.

i know i'm demanding... but i only ask this shit because i feel like it would create unnecessary issues in the future.

maybe counceling is the answer. i'll talk to him about it.

thanks anon!

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>>18299896
> iOS 12

does he have siri activated?

Yeah it said 12 on the Facebook app it says 10.3 in settings. He has Siri on. Can't access Siri voice the botton is gone

Barring specific traumas, people hate themselves for three main reasons:

1) They feel alone and rejected/ignored by other people,
2) They feel useless, lacking in achievements,
3) Their brain is fucked up and prone to depression.

The first two can be helped by socializing/working at concrete goals, but it's slow and frustrating. The third one requires meds, regular exercise and sunlight, etc... But it's not automatic and some people just spend the majority of their life depressed.

>>18299894
Trauma is unlikely, I was kind of bullied as a child but it wasn't anything too severe. Very loving household.

I do feel lonely. I have friends and stuff but I feel like I don't connect with people, namely because I am just so boring and uninteresting.

I don't have any achievements, but then again who truly has? I do practice things and have hobbies, so it's not like I'm directionless. I don't feel useless so much as not interesting.

I am prone to depression but I doubt much more than your average person. I'm a fair bit more reserved than most people and think things too much, which can affect it maybe.

Self-compassion(not self-pity). Treat yourself as you would treat a dear friend.

I'm sorry, but where DID you see this relationship going?

>>18299880
i honestly envisioned it as her just wanting an older guy. i never thought of it as a serious thing

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Have you met her parents?
>tfw a guy just 5 years younger than you is fucking your daughter

She's jealous and feels threatened by a more attractive woman, a woman that lives with her boyfriend.

She's worried YOU'LL fuck her and leave her.

>>18299838
Imagine it as the reverse. Most people wouldn't be okay with their girlfriend living with a guy.

Would you be okay with it if your girlfriend lived with a guy who is hotter and better than you in every way, and you found out she had dinner with him and spent the nights hanging out with him? Wouldn't you be worried that she ends up cheating, or leaving you for him?

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>>18299837
its how life is and it sounds like you have a subconscious revelation about how little our lives actually matter. It has led countless people to commit suicide themselves, because what is the point? That's why media etc. don't talk or write about it, it would just lead to more suicides. The state/society loses resources when people suicide, they gain much more from people not realizing the horrid truths about life and the world.

I wonder if Neolithic people ever an hero

I'm just frustrated that theres no change in the way things are done. There's no support groups or anything being set up to help those vulnerable to suicide. The world continues and there's gonna be more kids like her that die for nothing.

Who gives a shit about the previous people, cause I'm sure they dove give a shit about you either. This is such an non issue that a thread tragically died for this.

>>18299813
Ok. Assuming they don't.

For general privacy reasons etc

What would be the issues against using a different name

>>18299827
If you really have to have social media accounts for this job then just set them to private like most people.

Yes, but it isn't likely to succeed. As soon as either one of you meets someone local it'll be way too much effort to bother with someone an ocean away you've never met.

if you have means to live togather/close then yes its possible

internet "gfs" who you never meet when you are underage is not a relationship

it takes more effort than a normal one

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>>18299779
>>18299779
I met my boyfriend of 3 years in a 4chan online chat and we live in different countries. I'm an introvert virgin, he's an introvert virgin. It works great, but we're also not normies and enjoy our online company above reality stuff. So yeah I don't know.

People say "online" isn't a real relationship but I spent most of my time online either way and so we just do it together. We watch anime together, video chat, talk all day, eat, share links. This definitely works.

>>18299775
The key word is roleplay.

Also before the act set up safe word so he wont rape you for real. Have fun!

Almost nobody refuses good pussy and oportunity to wrestle a bit with nice lady at the same time.

>>18299775
With your words

>>18299783
My boyfriend is a beta male I'm his mistress so it's kinda hard. I'm just tired of being the dominate one all the time.

>>18299750
I think this is something you need to talk about with your wife more than anything, anon.

I'm not great at figuring out what to say in these situations, but I hope this isn't too hard on you.

>>18299750
OP I suggest you consider this from the child's prespective, if given the choice would you have rather grown up without a father, or if they are lucky a good step dad?

Personaly I don’t think its fair to bring a child into this world in your situation.

Good luck with the cancer.

>>18299750
Don't do it.
You do not want children growing up without a father.
There is a reason men raised by single moms are such losers.
Plus you probably won't even see the baby born.

Then why would you want to be in a place where you ain't worth anything?

>>18299692
Because he wants to say "lol fuck this" and go get fucked elsewhere what can he lose really

>>18299692
I want to produce and make music in the city

>>18299735
This