Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1663. page

>>18307575
Welcome to quarterlife crisis.

you need to go to a different hospital

>>18307585
They are going to open a new one but it's going to take a very long time. Moving away from my family is not an option because I a high risk of sudden cardiac death.

>>18307521
She doesn't really have a life outside of me. She has no friends, her family is scattered throughout the country, nowhere near our state, and she doesn't really have any hobbies. I've tried several times to get her to socialize or to pick up new hobbies, but she never sticks with any of them (though she does like watching some anime now). I can never feel relaxed around her. This may be selfish, but she's got a lot of anxiety problems, and frequently has panic attacks. there's always something we have to do/buy to make our lives better, and I'm always taking things too slow, whatever it may be. The relationship, getting another pet, buying a new desk to replace an old one, trying some new $100 a month membership for skin products etc. Speaking of which, while she's got debts, she's also not great with money. Her family's always been poor, and since she's been dating me, she's been buying nicer things in general, almost all on my money. If she wants a new book, CD, movie, clothing, most of the time it will be me paying for it. Also, I pay for every single meal. Not just on dates, I pay for all the groceries, I pay for every snack, I pay for every time we go out, even if it's just to McDonald's or something. I just want to be able to look at her and relax, feel happy to see her. I can't ever do that. I just feel responsibility, crippling debt, and emotions I have to tend to.

Also, in general, I never saw myself getting married until my later 20's or early 30's. I'm 21 right now, and getting married sounds like signing away years of having fun and going places with friends or by myself, signing away any and all time to myself, and signing away financial freedom. Like I said, my girlfriend seems overly dependent on me emotionally, and she can't handle being alone for long. She's told me this, and I've tried to be understanding. I'm sure I could be doing better, but it makes the relationship and just spending time with her exhausting. (2/6)

>>18307526
I'm really introverted, and she just doesn't understand alone time. Not to mention she has trust issues since other boyfriends have cheated on her in the past. She regularly goes through my internet history and checks my texts. In return, she tells me I can go through her texts and internet history, but I don't care to, I don't feel like I should have to. This just makes her feel more suffocating.

Some of you might say this is just cold feet for marriage, and that's understandable. However, I've had most of these feelings for a lot of the relationship, in which case, this post really isn't about marriage so much, but just the relationship in general. I would've broken up with her by now, and we did at the beginning of last year. She became really depressed for the next several months, more than normal. She's tried committing suicide before, so this really scared me. Also, instead of getting a part time job like a normal college kid, she literally fucking sold herself as a sugar baby for money from old guys; I really wish I could say I was kidding. I ended up getting back together with her mostly out of fear that she would hurt or kill herself without me. For the first 2 months, I told myself I was really happy and this is how it should be, but I just wasn't happy. Well, ever since we got back together, I've stuck by her because she has no friends and no family anywhere near her to go to. Hell, I'm her emergency contact for her job and school. I've always been scared to death that without me, she'll die or drop out of college and become a fucking prostitute. She's told me multiple times that if we weren't dating, she would've starved by now because her family won't help her out and she won't look for a part time job because she says "I'm in college." (3/6)

>>18307532
We've gotten into some arguments about commitment, and the subject of breaking up did get mentioned a couple of times. Each time this happened, my girlfriend broke down crying hysterically and then went into a panic attack. This just confirms my fear that she can't function without me. This fear has been the reason behind pretty much everything I've done in the relationship for the past year. I bought a $4000 engagement ring and proposed to my girlfriend not out of love, but out of fear that she would die if I didn't. Not saying that's her fault, because I made that decision, but that's where I'm at right now.

I'm making my girlfriend out to be this horrible person, but she's really not. Like I said earlier, she's a wonderful person. When we met, coincidentally we were both really depressed and in bad points in our life. She helped me out of my depression and always accepted me even at my worst. She's smart, she's funny, she's so kind it hurts, and we can get along great. Also, while I've said all these things about not really being much into my girlfriend, she worships me. She tells me multiples times a day that she's lucky to have me, that she thinks about me all day, she does anything she can for me just so I'll be happy. The reasons I don't want to be with her boil down to her being clingy as fuck throughout our relationship and being very high-strung/never able to relax kind of person, as well as massive dependence on me. This in turn has me feeling completely responsible for her emotions and happiness as well as responsibility for her financial situation. This makes me feel suffocated and tied to someone that doesn't make me happy anymore. I feel like if we had stayed broken up before we got back together, we would have both been in a better place, she probably would've moved to her mom and changed schools and been better off. (4/6)

how tall are you

>>18307511
Only 6'1 but I attract really cute short girls

>>18307536
how short

>>18307476
befriend him so at least when he snaps he doesn't shoot in you in the head while you sleep

A lot of indians are sociopaths, especially the darker, lower-caste ones. Good thing there aren't that many in the west.

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>>18307495
That's morbidly what I'm thinking, though I'm kind of hesitant to even engage him desu

>>18307499
>being raysis towards 5 Indian bros expressing their bond through a pose

Colonizers please go

>>18307289
Church

>>18307289
Tldr social events you hate.
>>18293702

>>18307446
I don't mind social settings. I'm looking for specific places in NYC that people had success with.

Don't message her only once a week you retard, she probably think you just wanna fuck her or has found someone who talks to her more than once a week

>>18307272
Well yeah, I've been trying to make more conversation but she takes longer and longer to respond.
Is messaging every couple days too little?

>she probably think you just wanna fuck her
God I hope that's not the case. I thought it would make me seem less desperate, I guess. I didn't know she cared that much until recently.

>>18307295
Girls are needy and like to be made feel special, you said your dating so you should be texting whenever you want, not saying you should be filling up her phone, but just try to make sure she knows you are interested in her

>>18307176

>pooped out a son

lol. First of all congratulations! I would prep for long sleepless nights of crying. Babies like white noise so you can try to have a playlist of calming sounds. They're also gonna put their mouths on everything which is their way of learning actually. So try not pull every single thing out of their mouth (unless it's hazardous obvs). Good luck anon!

Congratulations, anon.

write shit down
don't try to remember

Something is off there anon, usually they keep 2 man per group

>>18307198
Explain yourself.

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>>18307170
Find other dudes with common interests.

Good luck finding friends if you're not in college/high school. Making friends as an adult is awkward and forced.

>>18307145

Congrats. I did the same thing as you except when I was 21. Just enjoy your time there, don't be scared to talk to people, join some clubs or whatever. I also recommend you look into doing a co-op with a company through your university. This way when you graduate you will have a higher chance at employment.

>>18307169
How do you make friends in uni?

>>18307145
Do as many internships and projects as you can. Looks good on a resume. A hiring manager would rather see a 3.0 GPA w/ experience vs the 4.0 with none.

>>18307096
bit of context, we have been seeing each-other for a bit under a year now, and now that its gotten a little bit more serious for me I'm feeling it. Is this normal? I've never been in a relationship, I'm 21 btw just fucked tonnes of chicks and emotionally get them to fall for me and then I usually disappear.

And when I say I can help I don't mean "just be yourself bro" I mean answers.

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>>18307096

>Willing to give advice on being chad

Immediately disconnect your computer from the internet and go outside.

please respond, i have no friends and i cant trouble my parents more then i have, iv been on chan for 8 years and your the closes i have to someone that knows i exist, i have my gun in the drawer and i honestly cant think of reasons not to end it.

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>>18307082
Life has no goal. No life is any valuable than the other unless YOU rate it. You are suffering because you are trying to control everything. But everything is always changing. Stop telling life how it SHOULD be and just accept how it IS. Let go and enjoy what you have now.

>>18307112
but she promised wed never fall out of love she was not the prettiest girl so i felt like it would make it easier to find someone to love me forever, and then out of no where she says that, i feel like im completely even when i talk to people i have myself, i feel like im just a asshole.

Mercenary, merchant marine, oil rig worker, truck driver (circumstantial), law enforcement (circumstantial; state troopers, not street cops, make bank). Also, trades (electric, plumbing, and welding), but you need to technically study for those, so I don't know if you count them as college.

penis massage therapy

>>18307051
Is military any good?

I wish I could do something more for my mom but I know I can't even do anything for my self.

>>18306976
Give them grandkids

>>18306976
>What can I do for them?

Just don't end up like the guy in your picture. Its fairly simple really.

Just become a proper human being and make sure to tell them that you're thankful and turned out fine because of their help.

Also if there ever was something you fought over (like your parents pushing you to get a degree or something) make sure to tell them that they were absolutely right if you ever feel like that.

Look up University course text books and pirate them off of LibGen.

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>>18306947
>I'm broke right now so it can only be online
>Due to my limited time I can only study for an hour or two a day. I have to go now and let other people use computer.
Learn what a library is.

>>18307058
>limited time

>>18306777
>I dust and vacoom room every week
>it feels like there's not enough air/oxygen in a day or two.
Sounds like there's really something wrong with that place. Ask owner to get it checked for mold.

>>18306828
I think it may be because the room is small so I use up all the air in the room? It doesn't feel airless when I don't sleep in it. I make sure I'm clean and there's no sweaty clothes/socks in my room.

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>>18306860
>Room runs out of air with one person breathing in it.
Sounds weird but could be. How should I know?

Do whatever it takes man. Clean it more often. Don't stay there during days. Move to another apartment. I don't think there's any magic to it.