Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 160. page

Be prepared for the fact, that he will be different from that image you've created in your mind from all the late night converstaions.
May be he'll be better, he'll be worse, but he'll be different - he'll be a real person for those two weeks.
Prepare for this, accept this and squeeze as much communication between you two, as possible. It'll be helpful in the long run

>>18716260
and you know for sure he isn't going to rape and kill you as the culmination to his year long plan?

I don't understand LDR people at all, too weird for me.

Yeah, I realise in person we'll both be totally different, I know for sure I will be, I worry I might become too much, I'm also stupidly worried about what clothes to take with me, I'm from the UK and he lives in Georgia in the US.

what is your job?
I also live in London btw

You're in such a spiral of negativity that you're gonna find it hard to get out regardless of what anyone says here. You need some deep alone time and you need to really dig deep down and figure out how to change your core beliefs of yourself. It's never to late to change, I'd suggest traveling in some poor countries to give you a bit of perspective of your actual position.

Also lifting weights is mundane, if you want to get physically fit try a sport where you can join a club and meet people. Rowing, rock climbing, yoga, table tennis, anything is better than nothing.

Also one more thing stop dwelling on the past so much, you cant do shit about it now.

>>18716210
>>18716210
hahahaha. well op I have to say you might not be much of a charmer but at least your life is hilariously sad.

The issue is here is that you try to leave up to the expectations that other people set for you.

You think that friends, money, women make you a better htan others. But that's actually not true, at the end of the day you're a man and you're still alive so no one is really better than you.

Try to live your life in a way that makes you happy. Because that is a foundation which will never fail.

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I hate you too, nigga.

>>18716200
I get drunk enough for their retarded beliefs to make at least a modicum of sense. Hope that helps.

I have tried arguing with them in the past, but all it did was make me realize how true the saying "never argue with an idiot, he'll drag you down to his level and beat you with experience" is.

Argued over astrology, and the arguments made so little sense and they would just randomly turn around and say "hah, see, you don't know anything about astrology, you don't know what you are talking about" with smug smiles. Absolutely pointless.

One particular friend I just enjoy hating on, I tell him he and his beliefs are retarded all the time, and he takes it in his stride.

>>18716200

You kinda sound like an asshole. why be friends with them at all if its like this.

sad self-bumb

>>18716145
Just say hi. If youre too shy and arent more proactive in your relationships then this is what happens. Just fading out wont fix anything the long run.

>>18716222
every day i say hi how are you all kinds of stuff but they are just ignoring me

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>>18716141
cont.
I consider the air I am near when resting(my bedroom with my bed and computer) to be the air that I am used to. I go days without leaving it because of my anxiety and OCD.

The pollutants when going out to buy food at the store, the weird smells in the store, the exhaust fumes from the traffic, all cannot be safe and I do these exercises when I come home and finish placing the food in my room

>wash hands 3-4 times, twice up to elbow, last times just up to wrist with hot water
>go up to bedroom trying to not touch anything with at least one hand to keep it clean
>inhale in bedroom, exhale outside bedroom door through both nostrils
>inhale in bedroom, exhale outside bedroom door through left nostril, holding the other closed
>inhale in bedroom, exhale outside bedroom door through right nostril, holding the other closed
>blow around mouth for any particulates or pollutants that came out of nose or stayed on my face from going outside
>repeat this at least 3 times
>put face in front of air conditioner as some kind of change of temperature, breathe out and in a few times
>re-do the inhale/exhale/mouth routine, 3 times, same as before
>gargle water 3 times, over 1 minute each time
>hawk out any snot or anything in my mouth that could have collected pollutants from outside air, 3 times

I have to do that every time i leave the house. even just opening the bottle of water to gargle water, I have to blow on the sides of the cap to make sure there are no pollutants/particulates, the blow on my hand/wave my hand for the same reason, then open it carefully to make sure my hand doesn't touch the nozzle.

Just the breathing exercises take 15 minutes or so of constant strong inhaling and exhaling. It's extremely uncomfortable.

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>>18716148
cont.
>think my mentally ill family is trying to poison me
They're mentally ill so i think they must think that i want to kill them so they try to kill me first by poisoning me or at least incapacitating me cognitively.

keep in mind, they're all diagnosed with severe mental problems, i'm not. I went to a therapist a few years ago and they only thought I had aspergers. i've put cameras up and left food in my room and stuff like that to see if they go in while i'm gone, and i never caught anything, but it's still there in my head, this feeling of like "don't eat that" or "you don't know if this was tampered with"

it's a bit annoying and becoming a bit OCD.

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>>18716156
cont.

I have a severe problem with eating anything that I think is "toxic", or even putting something in my mouth like a toothbrush that I think has plastic with "toxins" in it, or toothpaste or mouthwash. I haven't brushed my teeth or anything for over one month now because of the fear. The same goes for food. The ingredients need to be natural or not show up as toxic when I google it or I will throw it away. This goes for microwaving food. They all have these plastic containers you microwave the food in, and I refuse to eat food that was microwaved with hot plastic against it.

I have this overarching paranoia, OCD fear that these things will kill me or make me stupid, or something. My stomach hurts from not brushing my teeth for so long and digesting the gross saliva in my mouth. My heart hurts, probably from some heart problem from the poor oral health and anxiety of these things.

I want someone to tell me that they went through the same thing. This is the worst I've ever been, physically and mentally.

>>18716046
>a family unit is the highest form of relationship/frienship between humans. Unconditional love. But we aren't all a family
just food for though:

family units are created by former strangers who dated each other than then fucked, which means they were exactly as susceptible to the whole idea of the value of attractiveness and wanting to get something out of the other person

A man I know got into a car crash when he was younger, in high school. He suffered brain damage and can no longer walk, due to amputation. He learned to speak again, and has probably lost 15 to 20 IQ points if not more. His speaking voice is much different now, one you'd expect to hear from a disabled person. All of his high school buddies? Gone. He tried to contact them but they ignore him. Disgusting right? People fucking DISGUST ME. I hate them, and my hatred grows every day.

This sounds like an edgefest, but it's true. I have no desires to be violent against them, it's just I hate them. It leaves me very conflicted. Because I love humanity too. But the days where I hate them seem more frequent.

>>18716061
Family unit including child, grandparents, aunts and uncles. I guess I should have been more clear. Good point though. My cousin just married a girl I consider not that attractive but she's very nice and I respect him a lot for it. Looks aren't everything.

But yeah that is a good point. It seems that mode of thought can even extend to families. "Well you HAVE to love them, it's expected." Well yeah, but at the very least we can say that some do or try to.

Just an extreme example. The mother and father of a murderer. Some disown, and rightfully so, some say they're still our son, and we still love him. That kind of love.

Try stack overflow? /biz/, /sci/?

>>18716013
it would be helpful to see the exact data format

so far it sounds it sounds like sheet A has just one single column and every cell contains 4 values separated by semicolons

if that is indeed the case you should split the one quadruple column of sheet A into 4 columns

then merge all A sheets

then, in the merged sheet, paste the B sheet not below, but "to the right" of what's already there

then sort the rows by ID (ascending or descending. Excel can definitely do this with numbers. I just hope the IDs are all in the same format [zeroes in front or not etc])

then youd just have to make a formula that puts the content of the "name column" on the right into the "name column" on the left for every row. because of the sorting by ID, the matching "name columns" will already be in the same row

hope that helped

>>18716013
Your in good luck lad. Fortunately, the task you are describing is fairly simple to implement using macros. This can bring the task down to seconds, which is probably very desirable to you. I can give you some code to get you started (obviously remove the greater than sign from these. Also note that the ' before a line I'm Visual Basic for Excel indicates the line is a comment):
>Dim varWorkbookA
>Dim varWorkbookB
>Dim varWorkbookAPath
>Dim varWorkbookBPath
>
>varWorkbookA = ActiveWorkbook.Name
>
>varWorkbookBPath = "C:\Path_of_workbook_b"
>
>Workbooks.open varWorkbookBPath
>
>varWorkbookB = ActiveWorkbook.Name
>
>'do a for or while loop
>Workbooks(varWorkbookA).Activate
>'Google code for ctrl f function
>Workbooks(varWorkbookA).Activate
>Range ("A1").PasteSpecial

You'll be best off going to /g/ with this one. It's trivial if you know excel VBA, but if you don't know it, it's a pain to implement

>>18715998
Maybe not autism but he definitely has something.

>>18716023
He's just becoming more and more difficult to deal with and the whole family notices this.

Now my dad happens to be a smart man, he used to be an FDNY captain, so he knows how to command people, and he's brilliant when it comes to math, money, the stock market, etc, but everything else he comes off as an imbecile.

Even his "friends" at his Elks Lodge think he's crazy. They call him both genius and stupid but they yell at him for having a shirt attention span.

He's extremely forgetful, and the fact that he's hard of hearing just makes it all more frustrating. He refuses to get a hearing aid, and he blasts the tv at volume 40 saying he doesn't keep it loud because he's hard of hearing, but that he just likes it loud.

>>18716040
He could seriously have a degenerative disease. Get him checked out.

>>18715988
Spoke to someone I haven't spoken to in months this week, we stopped talking out of anger then I built it up as a massive thing and ended up avoiding it for all those months.
They were actually cool with with it, was stuttering and shit but I feel better afterwards for having done it.

Met a girl on a night out yesterday in freshers week. She let me come back to hers and let me piss in her mouth. Was brutal.

Felt appreciated at my 2nd job, it is a dead end job and I have one much better than it, but I finally felt appreciated there after at least five years feeling like shit.

The manager there doesnt know about my other job despite telling him multiple times I teach, and he called me in. Being the schools were closed cuz of the hurricane I went in for about eight hrs the other day and made some money.

But it felt like a family there, everyone was a team and even the Asst. str mgr really thanked me for coming in.

Power was out at the house nyway and still is. The store hadta throw away a lot of food though cuz of an outage, they had a 2nd generator but it didnt really do justice for the meats.

>>18715895
TRUST NO ONE

>>18715922
Thanks

>>18715895
My experience has, without fail, ALWAYS been "once a cheater, always a cheater." Any time I have dated somebody who cheated on other people in the past, they cheated on me. It was generally after they cheated on me that people would open up and tell me the guy had done it before. If I were you? Going into a relationship KNOWING somebody has no issue at all with sleeping around on their partner is not smart. I would find another girl, OP.

>>18715812
If you don't even have an idea I'd hold off from makeing a decision. Your parents seem alittle irresponsible with money.

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You have awesome parents,
I suggest finding a place in the same state/province your parents are in. I also suggest heading into the city, they tend to have the better community colleges, the city is also a good place to find a starter job if you wanna train for your future, hope this helps
Sincerely, Cinders2Ashes.

Thailand
Philippines
any other 3rd world country full of whores

>>18715723

Maybe start with karate or teakwondo, where the kids classes have a lot of emphasis on dicipline and respect

He can switch over to combat-oriented martial arts once he gets a little older

This will also be a good compromise for the sake of your gf

> turn him violent
So what. Look at someone like say McGregs. Many good fighters have aggressive personalities. Being a fighter yourself you should know you need that killer instinct so to say to truly be good. I think grooming your son to be a great fighter is a noble goal. Also if your girlfriend isnt the mother she can fuck right off.

>>18715723
Your gf is retarded.
Example are you violant? No
If you ever see mma fighter interviews there humble as fuck.
Fighting builds skills, perseverance patience and other stuff. Also your kid will be able to defend himself. Why would she want him to be chucked by bullies. Just teach your kid about being kind to others and shit. Honestly your girl is being irrational.

>>18715659
>want to be friends with girls

not possible.

Guys only pretend not to want sex with women because they think that eventually they will get sex.

>>18715699
This.

i mean i guess you could become friends with your gf's most loyal friends who wouldnt ever think of cheating
also dont ever do shit that would make your girlfriend think that you valued the friend more than her

>>18715593
Just start hiking and biking dipshit. Get a landscape job. Make moving to the country a goal you push yourself with.

>>18715631
I would hike all the time if I could, but I can't because I'm busy studying. Moving is a goal though

>>18715656
Get a job landscaping to pass the time then.

>>18715580
ciggaweed

Don't smoke

>>18715580
I smoke Marlboro Smoothe shorts
Honestly, they're all pretty decent once you get used to them