Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1501. page

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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything

GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.

FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>What do girls/guys think about <an insecurity including, but not limited to: looks, physical traits, personality traits, virginity or otherwise lack of dating experience>
There is no one answer. Preferences differ, but complexes are always a turn-off.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it, little by little, step by step. There is no single magical moment that will instantly change you forever.

>I like someone. What do I do?
>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. You're overthinking it.

>XYZ happened. Interpret this for me please
We're not in their head, we don't know.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing.

>Someone has made it super clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No.

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>.

>Brandon, that guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships, fart guy and the guy who stuffs his pants
Fuck off

>Why is there no new thread?
Create one yourself. You can use these macros: https://imgur.com/a/y6BF2

previous thread: >>18415571

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Should I buy a dehumidifier? It gets pretty hot in my apartment (faces south towards the sun) and there's not really any way to connect an AC unit of any sort. Would a dehumidifier help at all with the heat?

I live in the prairies which I thought were supposed to be drier (could be wrong), I'm honestly completely unsure how much a dehumidifier will do.

Anyone have any thoughts? Thanks.

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Part 1/2

About her: lives with parents, dropped out highschool(Getting GED) at 14 cus of bullying(didnt know this until we started dating)

Me: working parttime, and live with roomate
(^these are relevant to story)

> met through xbox(yeah lame), did most of talking there, played games, watched videos, talked in general
> we text too dont worry
> We've video skyped once in entire time dating
> tired of voice chat and text, want to talk to her face to face
> for past month or month in a half asked if we could video skype
> She's def not a catfish, i have some of her selfies, most ppl would considered her unattractive
> thought maybe i was ugly, but she and her friend say im handsome
> refuses because of body image issues but i still love her anyway, and tell her that
> says she needs to prepare mentally
> 2 weeks pass, ask what do I have to do to get her to video call me
> asks me to marry her
> i was confused if it was a joke, laughedit off, told her its too early in a relationship for that
> she's embarassed, tells her bestfriend
>best friend goes off on me, says i dont love her
> bs drama shitshow for 2 days, didnt know she loved me that much
> we talk out misunderstanding, she knows its odd to ask something like that so early on
> another 2 weeks later she cant talk over xbox because family
> use skype with only me talking and her responding by text first couple of days, no big deal

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I found a temp job for a weem but I met someone there. She is much older than me (I'm 23 she 36 and just an absolutely amazing person in every way not to mention the most beautiful woman I have ever seen). She gave me her number on the last day.
Anyway we met on Sunday. We had a bottle of wine at my place. Talked and things were going great. After that she proposed we go for dinner and we did. Enjoyed another bottle of wine and our conversation continued. After this we went back to my place. And this is basically when things kinda went to shit. She asked if I had anything else to drink and so I opened a bottle of whiskey which I don't think I should have now. But we sat outside on my balcony chatting about life and family and halfway through I just began to get really depressed. I won't bother with details but growing up with my family there were a lot of harsh things. It was pretty dysfunctional and much of my depression stems from that and my train of thought just got completely side tracked.
We were both drunk but I definitely drank way more. Anyway my last memory is her and I kissing a bit on the balcony and then beyond that it's a blur (1/2)

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I've not ever been bullied. Which, seems strange I'm a super nerd with pretty niche interests (I'm on 4chan right now), I'm a virgin (until just the last few months kissless), I'm overweight thought not obese, I'm not attractive in any conventional sense, I am currently unemployed, I'm living with my parents, and I've always had a little bit of social anxiety. The anxiety has improved, and it certainly was never as debilitating as it can be with some, but still an obstacle. Still I have to wonder, why does everyone seem to like me? And know that I'm grateful, I just don't get it. I really want to know where this comes from. Maybe so I could start using it for useful things other than just feeling good around others, or maybe even so I could stop hating myself.

I had a girlfriend briefly recently, but she was... too sensitive and obsessed so I broke up with her. That's a whole saga in my life I'd like behind me. At least I didn't fuck her. And then I hung out with another girl like a few nights but it just obsessive again so I quit. Both of them pursued me. That's not really my biggest concern though. Throughout school teachers would let me slide on work. Tons of preferential treatment. One class literally just "disappeared" from my transcript because I did almost none of it. So I got through with a 4.0. Even though I definitely didn't work hard enough for it, I got through with that. One teacher used to actively compare me to another one of the top kids in our class and rank me above him. Which was weird for me, that guy went to Princeton, tried way harder than I did, and already seems to be successful. I went to a local state school, and dropped out after a year and half having failed many classes. It seems all of that preferential treatment did the opposite of help me. Even when I was a kid at home I used to get away with things. My mom sucked at disciplining me.

What did I do to deserve this? Do I have a silver tongue? What gives?

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My ex-gf sent me this letter. I broke up with her but I don't know if I should reconsider.

/r9k/ told me not to but I don't know if that's virgin jealously/rage

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>be jerking it for years
>used to be able to go in bathroom and jerk it to imagination
>usually me fucking a classmate
>get to high school
>find porno
>torturing my meat to hardcore porn for years
>2 times a day everyday
>meh
>have had sex and it hasn't ruined me where I can't cum or that I think I'm supposed to just cram it in her asshole or something
>haven't had sex in years
>still jerking it like normal
>been downloading more and more porn
>have this sweep of "guiilt" I guess you can call it that? where I say fuck it and delete all videos/pics of porn
>end up going right back to downloading and beating it after a day or two
>just started finding amateur porn
>literally fapping like 6-8 times a day now since finding amateur porn
>get depressed as fuck because I wish it was me in those videos having sex with a gf instead of just jerking it

How do I stop? I'm sure I was fine before but at 24 going on 25 I am NOT supposed to be jerking it this much. This can't be healthy for me....emotionally or mentally. How do I stop?

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How do I get over a 4chan addiction?
This place has changed the way I speak, think, interact with people, what I enjoy (or more specifically what I don't enjoy), it has worsened my social skills, and has made relationships harder for me
How the fuck do I finally leave this horrible shithole? It's been slowly killing me for 6 years

I used to be a relatively upbeat and humorous extrovert that a lot of people enjoyed because they thought I was witty or friendly or charismatic, I made a lot of friends I enjoyed, I had a relationship, etc
Then I started browsing 4chan and over time I've become more dull, I lost my touch of humor, I lost all of my social skills, I started growing away from friends and now have none, I've gained a growing depression which has slowly taken over all of the hobbies I enjoy, i.e. I've started slacking on weightlifting, I can't find enjoyment in video games anymore and only feel anger/dissapointment in them, I've been sleeping in more and getting tired more easily, etc
I'm an extrovert trapped in the life of a depressed introvert

So I want to finally leave 4chan. It's become my only source of comfortable contact with people, because even my online friends have abandoned me.
But that's the problem. I want to leave but I don't know how or what to do if I manage to leave.
pic unrelated

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My brother died in a car accident in December.


Just recently we started going though his belongings. He was a very private person so this was my first time in his house and I'm his brother and best friend.

I found several computers, This one seems to be the one he used on a daily basis based on where it was located (his office downstairs)


I found a list of passwords, pins, and passphrases under a set of coasters on his desk.

So I was able to get onto this computer buy entering 5 of the passwords until I got the right one.


I am almost 100% sure he has encrypted files on this computer, And having the passwords I can access them. But I don't know how to decrypt files....

It's windows 7.

I am almost 80% sure It's just hookers he has fucked, He has told me previously he fucks high end escorts and takes pics and video of them.

I didn't find that anywhere else so I assume they are encrypted on this computer (as his brother, And I guy...I assume this co computer because if he was masturbating to the pics he took he wouldn't want to go find another computer on the other side of his house to look at them.


Anyone help?


Said computer

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Question for youse guys...

So there's this girl that I work with. She works in a different department than me but we've talked probably about 4 or 5 times and I get good vibes from her. My question is, since I'm too much of a puss to straight up ask her out or for her number, would it be weird for me to randomly add her on FaceBook? Like what do you think her reaction would be if I did?
Thanks!

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>Boss complains I only work 9-5 when others stay around later
>I automated a lot of my tasks to get all my work done by 5
>Boss still wants me to stay late, to create work if necessary

How can I fake it guys

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my dad had a stroke and i dont know what to get him for fathers day.

i usually just get him tools but he cant use em.

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This is just going to sound edgy and lame but so did he.
I've fantasized about going out shooting for years now.
I get so fucking angry at the the thought of working shit jobs until I die that I wonder why I don't start planning what i've dreamed about for so long.

What would you have told him a year before he did what he did? I know it's not the same, his gripe was with women, mine is my place in the world. I relate to him though.

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Please help me decide if I should have kids. If it's something you need a strong, concrete yes or no answer to, then my answer is a weak no because I'm unsure.

I'm a 25 year old female, in a long term, committed relationship with a man. It is definite that I want to marry him. He is not my first relationship: I have searched a long time to find who's right for me. He is a suitable mate and I think a suitable father for children. We are currently not living together yet, but we are arranging it, and we will arrange to get married someday. I am currently on the mirena IUD and sometimes we use condoms as well.

To give some background info, my parents are the type of people who would disown me if I got pregnant (especially before being married). So when I think "pregnant", I'm not happy about new life, instead I feel dreadful.

Also, I have a phobia-tier fear of pregnancy itself (what happens in the body), and the birthing process itself. I first got those fears when my mom talked about it when I was a kid in front of me. And it might've been contributed by graphic movies about giving birth that'd be shown in the health class at middle school. Point is, I know it'll be painful & scary and I'm scared.

Finally, will I even be a good parent? The odds are stacked high against me, in terms of how I grew up, what I did, even my very personality. Will being a parent even be a good idea, with my fear of childbirth? It will be very hard to support a child when I have no family support network (and don't know how to find one).

I just always thought that it's better to have a child when you're financially stable, rather than bring a child into poverty and hardship. I always thought it would've been the greatest gift to wait till me & my partner are ready, but now I see I've waited too long. It's not just about the money. It's about having help too, especially from family and friends. My family will not help (and probably won't want to, or can't)

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Does it matter how many sexual partners a women has had? The girl I'm dating currently has told me that she's had 4 previous sexual partners (she's 18) but other people have told me she has a bad reputation for being a slut. She also tells me she's done anal. Should I give her a skip and find someone else or does it not matter that much?