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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1480. page

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So, today I decided to go out with a friend to a thing we had pre-planned, despite the horrible London attacks. Shortly after leaving the house, I got a call from my brother, berating me loud enough that the whole bus pretty much heard. He wanted me, an adult in his 20s, to get the hell back home. Reluctant and embarrassed, I returned.

When I got home, he gave me the "I'm sorry, but I'm not sorry". His actual words were "you didn't really do anything wrong, and I'm sorry that you're upset, but I'm not sorry that you're safe". I didn't want to escalate things, so I just decided to be the bigger person, and apologise. Then he actually had the nerve to call me passive aggressive, because I didn't want to talk about it further.

Later in the day, he brought it up again. This time when I did try to talk he got aggressive and shut down the conversation, and went off on one.

I realise some of my actions seem passive aggressive, and I probably am, but my intention isn't to get a rise out of someone, or indirectly insult them. I grew up in a house where it was better to just keep your mouth shut, and bottle your feelings, because things had a tendency to go from 0 to violence pretty quick.

I feel I should add, I did omit where I was going, because I didn't really want to talk about it, and get into a fight over it. My family is super overprotective, and it often feels there isn't much personal space. I just want to keep things private, and on a need to know basis.

Despite my intentions, was I being passive aggressive, was he, and who's in the wrong?
9 posts and 1 images submitted.
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He's a nosey cunt, tbqh.
Should've either told him to fuck off, or "yeah, sure" and still done what you wanted to do.
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>>18385568
I did consider just ignoring him, and going. But, it wasn't just him. My parents were worried as well, and wanted me to come home. But, the problem is he couldn't let it go, and kept poking at the issue. Also, just ignoring him and doing it would have ended in an even bigger fight.
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>>18385568
Thanks, though. The verdict in the house seems to be I'm in the wrong.

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When should I start applying to colleges?
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When you know for certain what you want to study and you aren't just going because you're supposed to.
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What do you wanna do?
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>>18385465
October/November, especially if you're doing early action.
If early decision start in September

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Today, I ate 200 calories so far. I had 100 calories of oatmeal for breakfast. And 100 calories of eggs for lunch. It turned out the eggs were spoiled. I now feel bloated, and I feel sick. Should I eat dinner? I am not hungry, but I need to eat more calories. I am overweight, but not like obese or anything, I have a bmi of 24 or 25, I don't remember.
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>18385425
if you aren't puking and shitting by now, just have a light and bland dinner thats easy to digest
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>>18385425
You should work out more and worry about counting calories less.
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>>18385425

...Why do you need to eat more calories?

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The fuck is this red thing all over my chest?

What I know:
>not itchy
>not an std
>not contagious
>it's ugly
>when I took acid once it has gotten away for a week, then came back
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>>18385383
is it raised? or any different from the rest of your skin?
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How long have you had it?
Where did it start?
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>>18385402
No, it's flat. But do you think a body can create a pigment like this out of nowhere? I haven't had this a year back.

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Help! I'm isolated.

growing up i always had people around me, friends, my large family, schoolmates, roommates in college, whatever in a major city.

then i moved away and got a job. nobody i know here is a friend. my old contacts are on the other side of the contact. every day i'm alone, have nobody to go to, nobody to get a beer with save co-workers. it's been 6 years since i've actually lived in my home city and saw 'everyone' again.

i have don't have issues banging girls, but i have issues developing connections to them so i don't see myself getting a relationship so i can rule that past-trauma out

and i didn't like being pinned as the clown or beta of my friend groups so i separated away from them to build My Own circles.


I feel so alone, at work, at home, and phone calls with my family don't cut it. what should i do ???????? should i quit and move back home to where all the people i know and love are?

fuck man, i wish being a kid again, playing donkey kong 64 taking turns with a friend from school over, while my parents did other shit, my my friend's parents did older shit, and i was constantly surrounded by people who cared about me
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>18385379
This is pretty common now a days, I can definitely relate. The only advice I can really give you is to explore your interests/ hobbies and meet people along the way. Lonliness is sort of part and parcel with the way industrialized societies are built, and it's not uncommon to fall into periods of isolation. What's important is not losing sense of yourself and continuing to develop yourself in the meantime.
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>>18385379
>i have don't have issues banging girls

*cough*normie*cough*
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I've found that loneliness goes hand in hand with self-hatred.
If you don't like yourself, loneliness will hit you twice as hard.
I grew up hating myself but with age I realized that I'm just a dude like everyone else, I started actually liking myself, I thought I was pretty rational and clever, it helped me out immensely and now I have a much easier time getting to know people.

Video games is a easy and fast way as long as you don't let them consume you, jump online with a mic and just banter with people, I've made a lot of friends that way.

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basically anything you'd recommend doing with condoms to make them less obnoxious to use

also brand recommendations

also why the fuck are they so expensive
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>18385326
pre tear the corner when you start fooling around
Then get really hard and open the condom package

hold it firmly and roll it down your shaft,
it can be hot to have the other person do this for you

as for brands, dunno, I avoid spermicide its not great for your cock or her pussy. I also get the ultra thin ones cause condoms suck, but if you have a longevity problem then don't get those.

make sure you get ones that match your dick size (girth mostly)
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>>18385326
I like Kimono and Skyn
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>>18385326
>also why the fuck are they so expensive
packs of 100 are rather affordable
but then you're posting here, so you'll never ever have the need for 100.

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In Canada
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>>18385282
Because all you fags do is look up formulas in ASME codebook.

But in all seriousness, engineers who are just starting out are paid a decent wage. Only the engineers (usually older ones with experience) make the big bucks.

Also, many employers just want you to rubber stamp shit so they are legal.
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>>18385282
don't worry bro
us scientists are also getting fucked over in terms of wage

the further up the academic ladder you go, the less the average person gives a fuck (with the exception of medical professionals). At this level a few big wigs get all the glory and researchers post docs and junior engineers do all the work and get basically nothing.
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>>18385282
Because most engineers are fucking useless tools that have no real life experience with anything. Seriously, I'm a production manager and I spend at least 6 hours a week red-lining drawings because 75% of the engineers I work with just copy and paste shit, and completely lack common sense.

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I have been dating my girlfriend for about a year.

But have been having her live with me since before we were in a relationship, she was a co worker who needed somewhere to stay.
and she was cute, and i liked her so i said fuck it, come stay at my place.

I wouldn't say i was forced into this relationship.
As i stated, i found her cute. I liked her a lot and enjoyed her company.

So about a month in, we make it official.

she would die for me, too.
i know she absolutely loves me. i know she's in love with me. i know she loves me more than she has loved anyone or anything.

My problem is, i'm 21, and i don't know if i'm completely in love.
I absolutely do love her. I care for her, i love caring for her and making her happy.

It's what keeps me alive really.

The question that passes my mind every half hour is, can i do this for my whole life? is she the one i'm supposed to stay with?
should i really marry her and bring children into this world with her?
I feel like i'm supposed to experience more people and single life.
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Break up with her or suck it up
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>>18385218
i couldn't live with the guilt. i know i'd ruin her for life. and i couldn't live with knowing i ruined someone's life.
she doesn't deserve it.
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>>18385211
>I feel like i'm supposed to experience more people and single life
Says who? So you want to sleep around and expose yourself to possible STD and unplanned pregnancy just because that is what is considered "living"? You have the mindset of a child. You know what living is? Having goals set and working toward them. Having your finances in order. Taking trips and seeing the world. Spending time in the company of good friends and family. Having a companion that sees you for who you are and will be there for you like family because that is basically what they become. Security, son. That is true living. If you want to spend countless nights drunk, in bed with people who's names you don't remember and untold social drama from other partiers, break up with this girl right now. Stop wasting the time of people who want to have something of true value in their lives.

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Could the police look through my internet history without having any of my devices? For example, if I committed a crime and had searched something relating to it, could they look through the search history of an entire area and pinpoint that it was me? Not that I want to commit a crime. Pic unrelated
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>>18385206
You'd have to look up your isp's policy on that. Generally, they'd prefer not to share their information for free, but a warrants a warrant.
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>>18385213
Will this be done for smaller crimes, such as a theft?
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>>18385240
I have no idea man. It depends on how hard and resourceful the boys want to be to nab you, if they need more conclusive evidence. The world is not as Orwellian as people make it seem, but its still great to be cautious of that.

But it takes a pretty serious court trial to get all the info they can get to bust you. The most id worry in your position is them checking up on you and your house. But theres more crimes that happen everyday.

It takes a team of 10 agents to fully stalk a single person. They're only doing that to muzzies nowadays, generally

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He's an asshole that doesn't do much of anything, my mom doesn't know much about taxes and usually has one of my dad's friends do it for her under a joint marriage file. But since she doesn't know, technically she's evading too since his name's on it and it claims he earns 0 when he's a self-employed service worker. I want to report him/screw him over somehow but I'm afraid my mom would go down for it instead.
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>>18385195
Be careful annon, you're gonna hurt your mom in this one.

It might not be worth it
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>>18385195
First of all whose paying the rent. Maybe get life insurance first. Lots of dad's get murdered every year. You gotta look out for the family. Insurance is a back up
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>>18385195
>Considering reporting my father to the IRS because he doesn't do much of anything

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I don't really enjoy many things but what I really like is music. I love just seeking new things everyday, finding new interprets and sounds that I haven't heard yet and I built up a pretty big collection over the years. I played drums in the past but never really got good at it, mainly because I wasn't disciplined enough for it. Always had a good ear for music and rhythm though. And in the last couple of months I've been playing with an idea of trying to learn how to dj.

I'm 21, is it too late to start? Where should I start? How much does it cost to buy some basic hardware (used, of course). I would just like to be playing a few nights at small clubs every now and then.
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I don't want to ask on /mu/, they are all faggots over there.
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>>18385149
21 is not too late to start

anything worth doing is difficult and requires dedication

theres about a million different ways of doing this, so consider if you want to be making your own stuff, mashing other peoples stuff, doing it live, or compsing music at home.

I personally recommend as a good starting point a kaossilator. I have the pro version and its awesome, but if you can record or sample from a regular one ~$150 you can a ton of awesome loops you can then edit and sample later.

Some expression pad that works with a DAW (digital audio workstation)) is also ag ood way to go.

if you don't want to spend money on software, look into Ubuntu Studio, it comes with tons of awesome free professional quality software
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>>18385681
Thanks man. The thing is I don't know literally anything about the know how, where should I start, where should I learn from?

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What does normies have that makes them able to get laid while 4chins users are left to become an wizard?

>see normies in everyday life
>fat, lazy, unemployed, ugly
>still somehow has a partner

>see anon posters
>average in all aspects
>still somehow single and virgin

Is it really all about being introvert or extrovert?
8 posts and 1 images submitted.
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>>18385067
Most of people on this site aren't virgins.


Anyway - lack of social skills.
Being introverted doesn't make you a social inept, but a lot of people on here are.
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People talk about sex and relationships like it's some thing unlike anything else. It's just social interaction. Not just everything leading up to sex but fucking itself as well. You're interacting with another person. Whether you can interact with someone else well is the #1 factor for getting someone interested in you.

Sure many guys here meet few girls to begin with because they have little going on in life and/or are overwhelmingly in male dominated environments. But it's also about being able to quickly establish common ground or a spark with someone. "Normies" who like talking to people will be more relaxed about initiating small talk with just about any girl they meet. Then they can find out that the girl who's perhaps not a supermodel that would've stood out to them on the street, is actually cute and shares similar humor and has something over her that interests him. That's how regular couples form... aka the opposite from staring at the hottest girl in the room from afar and picturing life together.
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>>18385067
I'm a 4chan user, and I get laid all the time
these aren't connected concepts

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It is INSANE how alone you can feel in a relationship.

What makes it worse is that there isn't anyone to go to for help.

I am looking for advice regarding my relationship with my girlfriend, and I know that I can't ask for it here because people that respond to threads regarding relationship advice give knee-jerk reactions and act like the only course of action is to leave your SO over some petty shit. Nobody wants to work anything out.

And I can't blame you, it's not like you know who I am. It's not like you know my GF. You're just working off of the stereotypes. You have an image in your head of who she is, who I am, and who we are as a couple. You're can't be asked to take the time to sit down and ask questions regarding the situation or how each individual feels about the scenario, so it's easier to just dispense "blanket advice". It's easier to just sit and say, "Nah, just scrap the whole relationship and just wait for your fantasy gf that never disagrees with you."

My girlfriend of 5 years and I are arguing more and more over silly shit. We will both get upset and then realize halfway through that we're being childish and that we need to calm down. We fix it and apologize at that point, but it's becoming more frequent. It always comes down to one of us doing something and the other one saying "You shouldn't do that!" and escalating from there. Why do we feel a need to tell the other what to do?
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Leave that bitch
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Disagree, I see lots of 'break up' suggestions' but there's also plenty of 'stop being a little kid and talk about your problems together' suggestions.

really, like with any other question posed, you get pretty much every possible answer. you're just singling out the 'break up' posters because they are admittedly easy to spot.

but you can't really blame someone for suggesting ot break up when a lot of the problems like yours are
>we have this issue that drives me insane
>but no matter what you suggest i will insist there is nothing that can be done about it
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I know how you're feeling...
...me neither have someone to talk with (because nobody would understand how much I love my partner, and that my wish is making everything to go good again).

Cheers you, anon
Try to talk with her, she's probably suffering too

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>have a cuck fetish
>gf wants to cuck me
what do
6 posts and 1 images submitted.
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Give a little kiss to an oncoming train.
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Have fun with your relationship where you will never feel adequate physsically or emotionally and will constantly feel like a failure. Btw it's already lost if your gf wants to do it. She clearly already has no respect for you and wants you to pay for her shit while she fucks other men.

All in all I would consider an hero.
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Cuck fetishes are just a meme. Watching porn and actually being cucked are two different things, and you will probably not enjoy it like you think you will. If your girlfriend is serious, consider moving on.

Tldr: wife and I separated, mostly due to me neglecting her, about to not see her for a year what do.
My wife and I separated on her chose because she was unhappy. I will admit now that with us separating it has helped me realize what I did wrong. I want to correct these things but she says she gave me the chances and just wants to move on. Due to work im about to not be able to see her for a year or so. What can i do to earn a chance in her heart again, she says she wants to be friends, but its just so hard on me.
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>>18384996
Just keep her on the leash. If you come back and she isn't pregnant then ok be Captain Save a Hoe...you could find a husband at your new job
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>>18385004
And how would you go about being captain save a hoe then? She has said she has no feelings at all for me now.
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>>18384996
Give her space

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