Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1435. page

If you are not in a relationship op personally I would do it.

>>18421455
Hahahah. Gotta love 4chan. Believe me I'm tempted but like I said, it can't happen for several reasons.

>>18421450
Bone up on your 80's rock because fucking her to her music will rock her world. 50's not old

>>18421441
the fact that you were open and honest about all this might change something but at the end, if I were him, I would just move on.

sorry but shit can happen and you also need to move on if he breaks up with you.

>>18421465
well that made me even worse but thanks.

Don't they just give you a shot for the clap?
Just get the shot?

>>18421304

It's a part of life. It's all there is to it. An inevitability but don't forget when they're going to go they'll have lived their life time just as once you're about to go you'll have lived yours. No on is really being short handed and their deaths are important in the sustenance of life. That which all your descendants require for their life to become real.

Think of immortality as being representative through your genes. As long as they're passed on then that which made your ancestors and make you are making it into the future in a conscientious mind which would not exist if it wasn't for all of you prior.

>>18421419
But isn't it fucked up that in order for new genes to survive old ones need to die
It is so sad and unfair, it is unbearable, the fact that they die because we need to live, how could a world so beautiful impose such thing on us?

>>18421429
Death isn't unfair just as life isn't really a blessing. They just are what they are and they require one another otherwise neither could exist.

It's sad that you have to say goodbye to people one day but when you say old genes die they don't. They carry on through you.

Nature isn't kind, cruel, biased etc... It just is. A system of life which has all the components to support life. Even when some of them components seem unfair and cruel they're just as essential as the ones we perceive as kind and beautiful. If everything was "light" we wouldn't know we were looking at it. We'd think we were looking at nothing.

Was actually going to make a thread about this.

I used to be able to keep friends and relationsips for a long time. Now it's so difficult.
I've tried being friends with people I've met here but following up on the convos and keeping in contact becomes almost a chore. What the hell happened? I used to have a bunch of friends back in the Diablo/FFOnline/Monster&Me age.

>>18421309
Why is it so hard outside of college?
I had friends and girls liked me.

>>18421277
If you're not a NEET, colleagues and classmates are an easy start.

If you're a NEET who's not broke, go travelling and stay in hostels, you'll meet all kinds of people.

If you're a broke NEET, pick up a hobby. Play basketball against people at the park. Go to a book club. Anything.

>>18421262

Stop listening to the red pill and grow a spine. The "self" part of "self disciplined" means you gotta do it yourself.

Start small. Make a deal with yourself to do whatever, uninterrupted, for five minutes every day. Do this for a week and then raise the allotted time to ten minutes, fifteen minutes, twenty minutes and so on.

>>18421262

self discipline is simply having the will to do something, even if you dont want to. the problem with a lot of people in our generation is that they believe we need to WANT to do something in order to do it, that there is some secret path to tricking our selves into doing all the things we claim we want to do but clearly dont want to do because we never do them.

its a myth. self discipline is you doing somethign for your self. otherwise it wouldn't be called self discipline.

some people use a reward system, for instance when i was younger and would do my math homework i would reward my self with a piece of candy for every 3 math problems i solved. but that ISNT self discipline, thats a reward system (though it requires some small amount of self discipline in order to not just indulge the treats without finishing the homework).

then there is the buddy system., im horrible about working out, but my roommate was GREAT at it, so i told him to force me to work out. again this still requires SOME self discipline to stop you from simply saying 'nah im skipping' but its a lot easier when you have someone telling you waht to do.

which leads to another great discipline system: being disciplined. the 'master-slave' system works really well, i mean we all did well in school growing up mostly beause our parents would punish us if we did not. children whos parents dont punish them tend to just flunk out. so if you're willing to surrender power to someone else, do it. the problem herei s its hard to find someone who wants to actually manage your life for you and long term its bad because without them you'll just revert. and again some level of self discipline is required because you could just get up and leave now that you're an adult, you are no longer a kid with zero options.

cont:

666 welcome to the carnal realm, a land of indulgence one layer above hell. Many orgasms lie ahead, but be careful. The descent is not a slow one.

Do whatever you want. I don't see the harm. If you're looking for a girl to marry, swing to a new branch when you get the chance (statistically speaking you should)

>>18421207

opening up a relationship like this is kind of a branching off point, but the desire is there so its going to happen or the relationship is going to dissolve.

so if you want to keep going, go for it. i would love to lick your balls while you fuck her, maybe DP her if we can fit them ion (im a little big)

enjoy OP

>>18421207
>be me
>talked about ffm with gf fr years
>basically talk about it every time we fuck
>6 years in we have our first
>7/10, like losing v card for better and worse
>no impact in out relationship
>skip two years
>have our second, 2/10 because the girl sucked
>get the third 2 months later
>8/10, beautiful girl, a real sweetheart
>few months later go to her house for the weekend (she lives in another city)
>11/10, have sex five times for hours, cuddle watching disney movies
>we're in love with her and she kinda is with us, a bit unsure because it's new to her and she's single
>Don't know where it's going but feels good man

Tl;dr: it takes a ton of maturity from the two of us to get through and survive, and you and her can get the feels for another person no matter how hard you try not to. Use escorts if you want to lessen the chance of it, but even then it's not guaranteed.

>>18421203
Stop overthinking, it stops you from "being in the moment"

If you like the person, and they like you, then you shouldn't have to worry so much. Just take things slow, and don't overstep any boundaries.

Granted, you're going to have to overstep the boundaries eventually otherwise the relationship won't be able to flourish.

It's confusing, but don't overdo it unless you have to. If you overthink, start getting anxiety, etc then you're more likely to fail. Kinda like a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Think of it like this - if you do nothing, never take things further because of anxiety, then you fail automatically. Keep that in mind, you're bound for failure if you do nothing and are too anxious.

Now, you have nothing to worry about and nothing to lose knowing that you're gonna fail going in. Realize that failure is a learning experience, but if things work out, then great.

Don't expect anything going in, I guess is what I'm trying to say. Expecting too much is what brings you to that anxiety/smothering stage where you feel like 'oh shit, I have to do this otherwise X will never happen'

Try to focus on getting to know him/her as a person and just enjoying their company rather than expecting a relationship. If things go well, the relationship will come as a side effect rather than the goal.

>>18421203
Why not just find someone who likes you back and doesn't play childish games when dating?

If you like her, show it. if she doesn't like you back, why would you even want to be in a relationship with her?

File: 1495762695449.jpg (57KB, 652x650px) Image search: [Google]

57KB, 652x650px

>>18421363

Only women and extremely attractive men can afford to act like this

>>18421142
With "approaching girls" its an appearances and numbers game. Get good at that. This is the courtship approach.

Another important factor, and way to meet girls all in itself, is making friends. Some girls will become interested in you if you talk with them on an equal plane like men and show kindness and understanding. This is the modern/feminist approach.

Use both approaches. Different people respond to different things.

>>18421212
>numbers game
>what he mean by this?

You need to use game theory to optimize your chances. Tactics include going to scenes with many single women, taking care of your appearance, and so on

>>18421212
>>18421220

Well appearance wise, I'm afraid I qualify as a skinnyfat, with the only fat on me being centered around my stomach area, front and sides, but not too much. Average looking otherwise, except for my slightly longer light brown hair and green eyes. But my looks aren't really the issue, if I had concerns about that, I'd head on over to /fit/. I just have no idea how to approach her. I never see this girl outside of a working environment.

Go to the doctor.

>>18421133
Here's a really bizarre and off-the-wall thought.

Have you considered seeing a doctor?

Well, if you were inept enough to allow it to get that bad in the first place, it sounds like you need to go to a clinic and get educated on how to take care of yourself, because this will keep happening to you if you don't.

>>18421111

unless you're willing to go to a designated courting ground, your only option is to talk to the women you find around you in life or at other social events.

bars, clubs, and literal single events are the desginated courting grounds. if you're going to whine about how all of those dont work for you because of reasons, thats fine.

but that means your only alternatives are to A) talk to people you meet in real life or B) talk to people at non-singles events.

your answer to A) is likely that your life is not condusive to meeting people, like you never go out and you dont meet new people at work and etc. etc.

so that leaves option B) non-singles events. these can be anything. no matter where you live there are local events. your response to this is 'HOW DO I FIND THEM?' or 'NO THERE ARENT NOTHING REALLY HAPPENS IN MY TOWN' in which case we would tell you to actually fucking try because every town has events. you can even create events by going to local hobby shops and requesting to host an event through them. you'll meet people, and they'll make money. you can also try meetup.

remember that simply doing a single search and then not bothering to attend anything is NOT actually trying. Even if the event doesn't directly appeal to you, go anyways. if you are going to insist on having events catered to your specific interests filled only with attractive single women you are in for a hard time, which brings us to our next point:

these are not going to be filled with attractive single women. if you refuse to go directly to designated cruising grounds then you are going to have to wade through a LOT of other dudes and ugly girls, and girls who arent single. welcome ot life.

hope that helped

>>18421121

My issue is that I don't want to go trolling around for women but I want to meet single women. It seems like I missed so many chances. I graduated college already so I can't meet women that way. Duck!!

>>18421139

>my issue is that i dont want to go around trolling for women
>but i want to meet single women

pick which one of these desires is greater and roll with it, and stop complaining.

>>18420968
What the fuck do you want advice for? You want to be a neet then be a neet. You want to stop blowing through your savings? Put some moderation on your vices. You want to blog? Start one.

>>18420986
How do I be a neet with no supporting cast?

I think you lack motivation op. Is there anything else you want that you can't have sitting in front of a screen?

http://goaskalice.columbia.edu/category/about-anal-sex

>>18420953
>it didn't hurt terribly.


Don't ever do ANYTHING sexual unless you can rplace that line with "I really enjoyed it a lot"

>>18421221
What if its about pleasing your partner?

are you 11?

How old are you? Why would a guy would need his friends' consent when it comes to things like this?

>>18420933
What the fuck

When it makes financial and mental sense.

>>18420843
As soon as they can legally drink the alcohol.

>>18420851

this. if its literally not possible whats it matter. different communities are also more condusive to traditional family units than others.

people living in the city tend to move out asap. people in smaller towns with larger properties tend not to.

>>18420842

just buiild up your own life and existence. the more you define your self as a singular person the less it hurts when someone leaves you. despite what rom coms have lead you to believe its /not/ good to be only half of a relationship

>>18420848
Can't tell you how much sense this makes now. Seems as if my whole defining purpose was her. Main part of the reason I had to fall back.

Going through my first one as well. Good luck, anon. I hope we both find our way out of this nightmare.