Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 1430. page

File: IMG_1578.jpg (131KB, 750x613px) Image search: [Google]

131KB, 750x613px

>>18423654

He's weird but worse than that he's incredibly creepy. He's obsessed with the game the witcher and his every interaction feels like a bad forced larp. He dresses like he's wearing a pseudo costume too.

I'm 90% sure the name he gave us is fake (just look at that bullshit) and he has a very vacant unwavering stare. At first I thought he might just be a retard on the spectrum but lately I find myself becoming paranoid that he's unstable and might have some kind of record.

I don't know how he met my niece or what she sees in him but he makes my entire family uncomfortable whenever they stop by. He hardly talks, will not address you until you address him first and When he DOES speak it's very unpleasant.

He's very rude (told my wife her cooking was like cafeteria food) and just says strange things. He told us once his job was "a listener" whatever the hell that means and he's extremely sensitive but indirect.

For example I made a joke about Hilary Clinton once and my niece informed me the next day that "he was very upset."

My niece confided in my daughter that this guy is Polyamorous and has been pressuring her to do weird sexual shit that she is very uncomfortable with. I seriously wish I didn't know that but it just adds to the weird factor. Lately the kid has seemed depressed. She's gaining weight and spending less and less time with her family and friends and now she's talking about moving in with this guy and I feel like I need to step in.

Recently his ex reached out to my daughter-seeing her tagged in my nieces photo on FB. She warned her that he was trouble but my daughter refuses to give me any details. Just that "it's pretty bad."

File: IMG_1577.jpg (141KB, 750x987px) Image search: [Google]

141KB, 750x987px

>>18423658


I've tried digging around but I can't find much on him online besides an embarrassing old deviant art page. I can't shake that he has some kind of record.

So here I am.

On one hand I'm torn, she's an adult who can make her own decisions and who am I to tell her how to live her life?

On the other I know this is going to end badly and I don't want to see her throw her life away by getting knocked up by a psycho.

I feel like if I go about this wrong she'll resent me either way but it could drive her closer to him if I fuck up.

I'm not sure how to proceed.

If you want to give her a heads up on what you think, then fine.

If the guy is a loser with nowhere to go to or is poor af, then she'll leave on her own.

Just know that we young ones are dense. Sometimes we have to make our own mistakes to learn life...

>be me
>20

>>18423631
Sounds like you're clingy too, OP.

And you have a problem if drinking keeps you from fucking your girlfriend.

Maybe try to be open about this and try to set shit straight before something goes south.

As for drinking, you might be an alcoholic if it is this bad, I wouldn't want an alcoholic father like my friends have had, so...either try to cut back (but the irritation will commence) or go sober for a bit. If you can't handle it, then idk.

May be crazy, but try going sober for a bit or at least cut back.

If it really is just that you drink alone, then stop drinking or drink with her. It's late and I'm disorganized.

>>18423644
We already had sex tn, I asked her earlier if she wanted to fugg a gain, she said "maybe." I prolly am clingy.
>>18423656
I have been open in the past, she said, "If nothing changes about [your alcohol consumption], we will fade apart"

>>18423616

by having a guy fuck you.

The same way you act out a choking fetish without choking someone.

You either pretend or don't do it.

ok

>>18423591
"Day eyeshadow tho. Girl knows how to work dem highlights to catch a boys heart"
Or some other dumbass joking remark.

Play the catch-up game, ask her out to coffee or something.

Not to hard broski

You had makeup on? I didn't realize that. You looked naturally cute and I love ........ about you.

>>18423591
Well, you can completely divert from that comment by replying that your crush was due to more than just her looks.

As a doctor working the night shift, at 330am, i ask u become a hospital cook if youre even halfway decent. A solid breakfast does wonders for staff

>>18423504
I work as an order selector for a warhouse. You can make a lot of money when you get over time. I make $16 and hour if i work one extra day I make $200 easy. But it's very mind numbing work. Physical you get use to the work.

It depends if you want to make a shitload of money take the pick job. If you want something steady you can keep for a few years take the kitchen job. Also incentive is a joke. At least at my warehouse.
ya you make insentive for a few weeks but they raise your standard. So you have work even harder to get the same thing. Eventually I stoped chasing incentive and took extra days. Easiest way to make money.

>>18423528
Mind numbing how? What's the headset shit like?

>>18423517
Outside of home I've never had a real cook position. Always been a prep cook. I'll probably be rusty but I get the jist of it.

>>18423486
Depending where you live, 65k can be more than enough. I make 66k, live in Utah, with 2 kids, a 4 bedroom house and a wife who stays at home. After covering all my bills and maxing out my 401k employer match I'm still saving 2k a month, no problem.

because jews run the economy like a ponzi scheme and fuck you that's why.

>>18423518
and there's probably not that many jobs in your area and the people with those jobs stay in those jobs because it's enough to live comfortably. try getting paid that much in a city, but being unable to move to a place like where you live because there are essentially no jobs.

it's bullshit.

with that, I'm going to sleep, I have to find some way to make my job work.

I might be a bad example, but when I was younger my expectation of what I'd earn vs the reality of what my abilities were worth was vastly inaccurate. I'd read something like "the average salary is 22k" and I'd think "well I'm bound to get average, I'm sure the 50% of people who don't get the average can be safely ignored in my calculations because I won't be one of those, shit why I'm sure I'm worth at least the 90th percentile and up!".

Then I'd go and interview at age 19 without any proven experience and previous success, without a car, not speaking three languages and being unwilling to relocate to Germany within the next 3 months.

Yes I know that we are often talking median and not mode with these figures, but please don't rule out reality. You must be able to see all around you that while people can earn a good wage, top earners are in the minority and you've got to be very lucky, or willing to move to where these roles are.

In my current role I have a lot of young guys coming in for a 'gateway' job. It is either their first job and they have designs on moving up in the industry or they are just looking for a work trial, something temporary or a reference for an apprenticeship, college or similar.

Most of them have completely crazy expectations. They assume I must earn 25x what I actually earn because of how hard I work. They assume the business must turn over 5% of what it does because they can't understand how profit and loss actually scales. They expect to earn 2 million a year sometime within the next 10 years and seem shocked that I'd retire if given a million right now because they seem to think that they'll be earning 250k a year within the next three years because you can't even buy a decent car let alone a house with less.

It is like, unless you are top 10%, you aren't going to buy a house. You might have been raised in one and have listened to your parents stories about working hard and starting a family, but you'll rent until you are 50.

That first week or so being so giddy and saying 'fuck it, I'm not ashamed to show I want to talk to her', and yet fearing I was trying to talk or interact through Facebook shit too much and possibly making her uncomfortable. Worrying that the way I respond to every. Single. Topic. of a person's message when I respond is possibly annoying. Probably seeming clingy trying to hang out so much, knowing that she has such a busy schedule as she actually has a pretty full life. The way I type. Just the way I type to her, I can hardly describe how awkward some of the things I say get. Panicking when she doesn't look at my messages for days after sending them at times because she's never done that, and feeling like a totally obsessive creeper because I know that isn't anything to be panicky or paying attention to as again, she's a busy person, and so on like that. This is exactly the type of person I never wanted to be. I especially don't want to be the person to put her through any of this kind of crap, or the shit that I've seen it lead to. She's had enough of that and deserves far better.

Then there's this past week. I moved recently, and she came to hang out and meet everyone for a bit that day. I really wanted to say what had been on my mind, and couldn't get it out. I froze because of it, and made her leaving my place completely awkward and potentially creepy. On facebook, there was this picture of Jack Sparrow shooing away a heart titled 'love', which I reacted to partially out of both humor and frustration... And she may have seen it, considering a post of hers I saw not long after talking on behalf of 'those of us who are single, wishing to build a relationship as solid and beautiful as' the one exampled. (I think Facebook is a problem I need to stay away from.) And today, I messaged her when she had messages from me that she hadn't seen yet (Which feels wrong, somehow) to ask her if she wanted to go to this little in-town carnival, and hopefully try to have that one talk... And I felt like I'd annoyed her with my extra messages, though she said she's been too busy to read. (My message was long, about this thing I'd gone to.) She couldn't hang as her schedule was full, so I asked if she wanted to try this week as I still have some time before going back to work. She said she'd check her schedule for next week, and I know I sounded clingy as hell responding that I'd be working next week, but to let me know anyway because it'd be good to hang out.

3/?

Maybe I'm overreacting even to my own actions and all of that would be fine, but: I have a long history of severe bouts of depression, as well as both anxiety/panic disorders. I've been feeling good for awhile now, feeling like I'm on a good path, but somehow today everything suddenly felt like it was collapsing in on me. I was moody and couldn't shake it, the old vicious, cyclic thoughts were starting back up. Some of it was all of this, most of it was my own stagnation and uncertainty toward life, but I took it out in the most immature way.

Posted to Facebook in a panic: 'When you can feel it coming back, how the hell do you stop it?' She replied: "'Better out than in, I always say.' - Shrek". Pretty sure she was saying 'So talk to me about it.', and instead I replied, like a piece of shit 'Love that movie, but I'm not sure I get the relevance of the quote here. And to be fair, in that situation, 'it' getting out was only good for Shrek himself in that situation.'

And that's the story of how I fucked up the best thing to happen to me in the past almost-ten-years before it even started.

>me biting this obvious bait

>OP goes to 4chinz for seduction advice
>wants to make girlfriend jealous
You're a tool, and a none-too-sharp one

>>18423433
If you ain't able to do that shit on your own, nothing we say will get you anywhere.

You've either got game, or you don't.

No one can give it to you.

The fact that you're asking on 4chan suggests you don't.

File: 8774A72E-AAC4-4BCF-91C8-7653086A1571-2164-0000035F1330F710.jpg (90KB, 567x736px) Image search: [Google]

90KB, 567x736px

>>18423433
Dude that's basic shit. Find out what she desires/wants and find use that to bend her to your will. Also you can pray upon her insecurities. Find out her traumas and what >triggers her
Then be hot and cold praiseing her the insult her. Make her feel an array of emotions. Make her laugh humor has a way of change if people's perceptions. You can also break into her bedroom drug her. Then tie her to a chair. Tape her eye lids open and have her watch and listen to things you want to indoctrinate her with. Guns also work.

>>18423428
Change your sleep schedule. Go to bed when you get home and wake up 8 hours later from that point. Or get a day job.

Don't be a selfish asshole keeping everybody up because your mr special with a night job. Make the necessary sacrifices.

>>18423461
Okay. I guess there isn't any other option.

I just feel like shit towards the end of my shift if I go to bed as soon as I get home. I really like everything about my job, but we don't really have a "first shift".

>>18423472
Maybe eat more or drink some coffee? What if don't go home and go somewhere else for a few hours. When do the people in your house usually wake up?

That's a bit of a dick move

>>18423414
Your not a failure. And that guy is a total child for not breaking up with you face to face. Either find a reason to move on or give up. There's still a lot of good out there for you to enjoy.

I'll bite.

That (now ex-, apparently) boyfriend is not worth your time if he's dumped you so coldly. The best advice regarding him is to move on (as it always is). Even if he comes back, don't let him in your life: he's betrayed you.

If I were you, I would probably mourn/mope/etc. for a while because emotions are hard for me. Then, after say, a week, I would start shifting pieces of my life around to find employment and a place to live/stay. Perhaps find/make a network of friends and rely on that. Staying alone is surely not going to help the loneliness. Just be aware, emotions are wild things, and the mind is its own worst enemy.

As others say, there are a lot of wonderful things in the world to enjoy, and you are absolutely capable of enjoying some/all of them. If your condition was so dangerous as to prevent there from being any future joy in your life, you'd probably already be dead from it.

>>18423407
Go to a gay bar.

Have a dude or ten stare holes in to your pants and try to cop feels on your cock.

Knocks the pervert and sex drive out of you real good.

Not trolling btw.

What you think women don't do the same thing?

>>18423407

you cannot actually reduce your urges without extreme measures. instead learn to be stronger than your urges.

t. your gayer hornier counterpart

>>18423398
Be an adult and tell her your not that into her. You know you have a problem with saying no. You have a responsibility to actively work on say no to things you don't want. And yes you would totally get raped a lot.

>>18423474
but i've already kissed her a few times, so she thinks i like her.

>>18423476
We'll guess what you can change your mind. I feel for you man. I'm the same way to many extents. I don't like makeing other people feel bad. But if you don't want to do something then you don't have to do it. She might feel rejected. But remember you are livening your life you decide the outcomes. No one else. Also the more you say no. The more comfortable you'll be with it.
Repetition is key.

>>18423388
>physical contact and affection
what do you mean exactly?

>>18423394
Hugs, kisses, sleeping together and virtually all kinds of touch that don't involve anyone's genitals being touched.

>>18423400
You find a person who's into that also

Yeah how about no and go an hero

>>18423352
He doesn't want to be friends he wants to have sex with you. Stay away from him. I know it seems like he likes you for you. But boys at that age only want one thing. He will get close to you and pressure you into doing things you don't want to do. Maybe eventually you'll believe you wanted it. If you don't want that tell him to fuck off.

that depends on the girl and her uppbringing.
if you go for white trash with no parental observation, daddy issues and low selfesteem then that might very well work.
i know from experience. also, read lolita for further information.

Looks for places that attract people with the same interests as you.

File: 714xS7m1HRL._SL1500_.jpg (250KB, 1500x1500px) Image search: [Google]

250KB, 1500x1500px

I'm the exact same, Anon. Maybe we're both just being paranoid? But regardless of feeling like a weirdo when trying to establish a friendship I still haven't found a person who understands me.

>>18423415
Great album, shirty cover