Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 143. page

>>18722877
She's not into you and has blatantly put you on the backburner. You should, in fact, stop bothering.

https://markmanson.net/fuck-yes

>>18722877
stop replying to the funnyjunk images. find someone else

>>18722890
Not OP, but this article is great advice, thanks much.

>>18722868
I tried 2 weekends ago to take her out to a fancy bar she mentioned she wanted to go to. I got dressed up, button down shirt, the works. I clean up pretty good. I told her we should dress up and have a date night. She threw on blue jeans and a t shirt and I felt horribly over-dressed in comparison so I changed. She noticed and said "I was going to wear something nicer but I couldn't find anything" (her room is a mess) but it's BS in my opinion because I see cute underwear, outfits, etc just lying around her room and she never wears it for me anymore.

It came to a point yesterday where we argued about it, and she basically told me that sex is tiring and she said she views it as something for the man to feel close to the woman. So I asked her what she means... does she have no desire at all? I didn't understand. She said she so rarely feels desire that it would happen like once in a blue moon if it was up to her. Which is why she never initiates.


A few extras:

I've told her some very tame things IMO - like, I would really like it if I came over and she was waiting for me naked or in something sexy to initiate sex. She told me she thinks that is "dirty and pornographic". She also told me she doesn't like dressing up in lingerie or costumes and wishes sex would be a lot shorter.

I told her I needed sex a lot more and I didn't understand her lack of interest. I mean, for almost 2 years now we've had sex two times a week (weekends) and don't even see each other during the week. For me, it's been hell to stay loyal. For her, she said not seeing me and not having sex didn't bother her at all because she says she is "too busy" anyway. She WAS in school, but she's finished now, and has been for 6+ months. So I don't understand.

>>18722872
Can anyone help me understand how a girl who had sex almost once a day, dressed up, went to porn conventions, shot home made porn,walked around the house naked, did a 180 and now thinks sex is a chore? She says that's just how women are, it's harder for them to be in the mood. Which I don't buy, because my exes have been hornier than me.

Before anyone asks, I have tried these things: Bought her toys, vibrators, sex games, try taking her out on fancy dates, tried taking her to nice hotels, went on vacation (she dressed up this time, but obviously didnt want to), tried upping MY game (work out, im fit, good looking, I have a lot of money in the bank now... irony is I was broke as fuck when she was more sexual), dressing nicer, go to a salon for hair cut, etc). I notice more attention from other women, but not my GF which makes my sexual angst worse. I've tried talking to her about this but it always ends up an argument, and she thinks I'm some kind of sexual deviant when I personally think I'm just asking for normal stuff.

TL;DR:
>GF of 4 years slowly stopped putting effort into sex. Also stopped dressing nice or wearing make up for me. But she does it for work every day.
>We used to do a lot sexually, but now she thinks a lot of that stuff is weird & dirty.
> I tried everything I can think of to change her mind and be more romantic but it doesn't seem to help.

I would have bailed by now if I didn't love this girl to death and already wasted 4 years of my life with her. I want(ed) to marry her, but I also don't want a miserable ass life with no sex. What the fuck is going on?

She IS on the pill - has been for like 15 years. Long before I knew her, and it didn't seem to affect her for the first 2-3 years of our relationship. So IDK what the fuck is going on. I've never cheated on her, I've always been 110% loyal. Never even flirt with other girls. Got my life together big time for this chick and I end up with this, feels like a slap in the face.

She has someone on the side and will be breaking up with you or is just cheating instead.

She did all that shit in the past because she was interested in you and wanted to make you happy and you turned her on. Now she's lost that interest. Why don't you stop trying to please her so much and ignore her for a while lmao give her a taste of her own medicine. Just tell her straight up you're going to up your game or I'm going to fuck sluts on tinder bitch. See what she says XD

Most men are still just stupid animals enslaved by their instincts. They also don't give a shit about anyone but themselves.

>>18722867
Most people are still just stupid animals enslaved by their instincts. They also don't give a shit about anyone but themselves.

>>18722853

>Whenever i'm out, if I see an attractive girl, even old guys, younger dudes, married dudes, everyone will gawk and drool like they're in the desert staring at ice cream.

I don't really notice that. Entertain the possibility that not everyone perceives the world the same way you do.

I think they call it *autism* these days.

>>18722817
lack of what they call a spark or chemistry. maybe do some research and hope you don't find too much hocus pocus.

>>18722829
commit suicide

>>18722829
Great response. You've given me a lot to think about, friend.

>>18722812
you can tell her you're worried with your words. with your actions you should try to maintain your cool, always.

>>18722820
I have told her I'm concerned and we will deal with what comes. Honestly though, that doesn't even scratch the surface ya know.

>>18722812
Don't act like you don't care but instead of telling her how scared you try to be reassuring. Because she's probably scared too and I don't think she wants to have to tell you it's going to be okay when she has cancer.

it depends

>>18722755
I'd say you should be together at least a year before you move in together. Right now, you're probably still in the honeymoon stage, so it's difficult to know whether this is really what your relationship would be like.

>I live with my family and he has like 4 room-mates in his house, which makes it impossible for us to have privacy.
Sounds like he just wants you around so you can bone whenever he wants to.

I don't believe in cohabitation. It works in marriage because you're both committed to putting up with each other's shit for life, but in a dating relationship especially so soon? You're basically going to wrap your lives up together which is a real test as you don't even know you're compatible in the long term at this juncture. Also seeing someone every day takes all of the excitement about of getting together when you're dating. Marriages where the couple lived together prior to marriage statistically fail at higher rates.

>>18722739
I do and frankly I'm sick of talking about it, no offense to you

>>18722751
You must not be that sick of it or you would have avoided the thread entirely.

What's up, anon?

>>18722739
I'm addicted to cuck/sissy/femdom/findom stuff. Basically anything where I'm in the submissive position. It's fucking embarrassing and not even a real illness, just a sign of my weak will
Should've been aborted desu

What did you lie about, your appearance, what you do in life, where you live?

>>18722724
>Literally my greatest fear, period, is her finding someone better than me. Her loving someone other than me.
She already does you stupid nigger

If you actually care, come clean and don't expect her to be fine with it because, frankly, she didn't owe you shit even if you'd come at her honestly at first.

I've been there. Met a an older woman with 3 kids who was intelligent sexy and amazing to talk to. I felt horrible lying to her so I came clean. It hurt us both but she respected me for telling the truth. I apologized and we went our seperate ways. Hopefully someone comes along that can make her happier than I ever could. She deserves it.

File: doctorsmilingwithstethoscope_115436.jpg (70KB, 626x702px) Image search: [Google]

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No. Doctors deserve to be shot and killed. They jew their patients for simple treatments and treat you like shit.

>>18722563
If your employer doesn't offer you health care you have to go through healthcare.gov.


There's 2 sides to this. You will be charged more than you insurance will be for the same treatment unless you negotiate it down and pay cash. But technically it's cheaper to not have insurance. If anything really bad happens to you though you'll be fucked just sayin. $14000 wont cover serious shit.

Wow thats fucking retarded OP. get on state insurance and get your teeth out for free numbnuts.

>>18722557

Cry all the time because you're a pussy and you could have what you want if you just asked.

>>18722557
Be brave and do it

Go to 4chan

>>18722515
Don't bother if you don't have money for a lawyer.

>>18722518
This. You're wasting everyone's time, especially your own, if you want to do it yourself and have no clue what you're doing.

>>18722518
>>18722525
I'm going to do to it. Helpful advice is appreciated. She doesn't have money for a lawyer either.

Neither, really.

>>18722302
Is the room and the own apartment in a similar location or is the room and car much further from work/school then the apartment?

>>18722307
>if you had to choose
learn to read

>>18722325
location is not a factor in this case

>>18722277
"Hey gurl hold on I gotta take a fat shit"
>enter bathroom
>masturbate furiously
>come back to her

In all seriousness, I'm in the same boat as you. I was lucky enough to sleep with her, so the pain numbed as I slept 2 hours

I'm no expert, but I'd say that the sooner she gives you a handjob, the better
Or we could just both be abnormal weirdos (I've never heard of getting blue balls after making out, but it's happend to me)

>>18722345
>I've never heard of getting blue balls after making out, but it's happend to me

I think its not about making out but about having really lengthy semierection thats not standard "pornwatching" erection. I also leak like a motherfucker almost through the pants...

I'm just hoping im healthy...

>>18722364

You're fine, you want to get laid, and your prolonged horniness gives you blue balls. Pretty standard fare.

>>18722259
hm, you probably gonna have to go out on a limb a bit.

if you wanna date the guy maybe try smiling a bit at him for a few seconds longer than usually but if he is socially awkward he will retreat so do it again a few times for him to get sure of it, he might need time to get his head sorted out. Then if he start talking to you a bit out of nowhere or something ask him out on a coffee/drinks. If he does nothing or retreats you just had bad luck. Most people dont like most other people so don't get discouraged :D

Alternatively making friends is actually a bit complicated without conversational skill in my opinion, ask him about his stuff maybe, like where he got them and similar things? Try to get natural conversation going, try planing some topics to talk about.

>>18722353
Thanks. I'll try to smile at him more, but I don't know if he'll notice. We sit right next to each other at one table so I never really turn my head to talk to him.

I want to ask him to come over or go get coffee. But like I said, we aren't really friends so I think it would be kind of awkward.

>>18722416
hm, try asking him something, like borrowing or looking at some item on his table.
Its kinda good if its a bit weird or redundant question, that should signal him you are interested.
And of course smile while asking him. If you smiled before when talking with him, dont smile the same way as you did before so he has a bit more of a clue that there is something on your mind :D

Even if it doesn't work out in your favor, you'll still be alive, it's not the end of the world. Dont let fear control you and deny you your happiness!

>>18722217
Are you a girl. My hormones fluctuate and make me feel emotional for no reason

File: IMG_6088.jpg (16KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

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It'll pass. And if it doesn't in a month or two see a professional. Don't be like me. I live like that and I'm used to it after a couple years.

If it get particularly bad at any point focus on living in the present and not acknowledging any past or future events and the low will be over and you won't even realise.

>>18722301
Im a male, which might make it even weirder i guess.. Something to also note down is that I often have it in the morning or evening