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I don't know if I'm confusing lust with love, but if it isn't love then why can't I get him out of my head.
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Seriously I'm miserable
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>>18683371
You're not loving. You're in love, which is different. I've been there countless times. In fact, I still am. All I can say is that it passes. Eventually.
Anonymous
Reality never measures up to expectations 2017-09-03 01:13:17 Post No.18683332
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Reality never measures up to expectations 2017-09-03 01:13:17 Post No.18683332
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Reality never measures up to expectations
Anonymous
2017-09-03 01:13:17
Post No. 18683332
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No matter what, I never seem to be satisfied with my life. Are my expectations too high? I've had objectives, but when I achieve them, I don't feel as happy and fulfilled as I thought I would've. I get interested in someone, but when I get to know them better they're not as amazing as they appeared initially. I have an amazing group of supporting friends, but I'm still never satisfied somehow.
This might be the result of me being into fantasy books/anime/games etc when I was younger. Reading about the character's adventures and exciting life made me feel hopeful for the future as a kid. Now it just makes me depressed when I compare it with my boring, average life. People using social media to reveal their lifestyle to the whole world, even though it's obvious they're filtering so only the good and enviable parts are visible, may also be another cause. I think the root of my problems is my inability to stop comparing myself to others.
What's annoying is that I have no reason to feel this sad. I have a nice loving family, good friends, no financial problems, in a very stable situation in general. But I can't help but feel depressed, not for the shit I've been through, but out of an abstract frustration. The carrot's been dangling right in front of my nose for years now, but I can never grab it. How do I stop desiring the impossible? How do I stop comparing myself to others?
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You will always desire the impossible. Man is an animal equipped with desires that the world cannot fulfill. The only way to be kind of happy is to accept that. No one can tell you how to do that.
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So just keep chasing the carrot, even though by the time you reach it it will be rotten...That's hard to accept, but you're probably right. And I suppose the most important thing is the chase. I'm usually more content when I have an objective to achieve, one that's interesting and engrossing enough for me to forget that the "carrot will be rotten".
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How do I make a tapered line in gimp that comes to a point on both ends?
I've managed to make the top end come to a point (pic related) but not the bottom end.
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>>18683296
I don't know, but I already thought of one work-around way.
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>>18683323
Well what is it?
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copy the top end
paste
180 rotation
move to cover rounded bottom
So just started classes again as a transfer student and in my object oriented c++ class, there's this real qt girl I want to ask out. We've just become acquainted, and we sit beside each other. So, I'll profile this girl, last time I saw her she was wearing a fairly small ribbon but very obvious. She has a colorful yellow backpack with some polkka-dotted design. It seemed she didn't have a notebook for the class and I offered her some paper, she initially said that it's alright but when the professor had us do some drafting work she says "Ok, maybe I will need some paper." She also doesn't seem very confident on the whole programming thing even though she took the prerequisite class which was c++ introduction. A day later, I was driving to the university going through the back entrance and I saw her walking by herself, heading home in the heat. I wanted to greet her but unfortunately the closest parking I could take still took longer and by that time I couldn't see her walking. Anyways, I want to ask her out, so what would be the best way about doing that? Also, she hasn't seen my face since I wear a surgical mask going to school. Should I ditch the mask too?
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>>18683278
>surgical mask
wait what?
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>>18684096
Most likely an asian region in the world. It's a common practice if you're sick or prone to illness.
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Yeah but im in NA so it's probably weird then.
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NIGGER
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Low effort shitpost, OP. Good job.
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untitled.png. you could of at least changed it nigger.jpg
Anonymous
How does one escape the process of becoming a beta male? 2017-09-02 11:48:30 Post No.18683110
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How does one escape the process of becoming a beta male? 2017-09-02 11:48:30 Post No.18683110
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How does one escape the process of becoming a beta male?
Anonymous
2017-09-02 11:48:30
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What are the most common beta male traits?
What outlook on life should one carry?
What skill sets does a true man have to carry?
I'm not talking of becoming a chad, but more of something towards that direction.. Also, how does one not resemble a beta male in terms of looks?
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Let go of the retarded alpha/beta male dogma. The more you buy into it, the more you will become one. I have never seen an actual "alpha male" refer to himself as such.
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>>18683116
Beta and alpha male are just semantics in this case. That's why I'm not asking on how to become the alpha. I believe that most of us are somewhere in between. But how does one push himself to become the best of himself and not become a vidya/meme expert with terrible hygiene?
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>there is no spoon
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I've never had a problem getting a girlfriend or even maintaining a long term relationship. But this is only because I didn't fall for the bee urself meme. I'm introverted as fuck and enjoy nothing more than staying indoors, but literally every attractive girl I meet is a basic bitch who wants "adventures, hiking, travelling..." etc. I have faked enjoying this stupid shit for years and now I'm 25. How do I meet a cute introverted homebody?
Alternatively, if the above is impractical, should I even bother trying to find a life partner? I enjoy physical affection too much to give it up, and having a dedicated girlfriend makes this on demand, almost. Should I just accept or try to get used to being alone?
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>attract girls by pretending to be something you're not
>wonder why you can't get a girl similar to yourself
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>>18683099
A valid point, and I'm trying to change this. But I don't even know where to look? I'm aware most people meeting doing shit they enjoy as a group, but by this logic the girls I'm looking for are chilling at home.
I tried the online dating thing as well, but the overwhelming majority of the girls there are also the "I want a daddy to pay for my vacations" type.
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>>18683112
There is no "designated introvert social mingling area", OP. You meet people by going through life. If your current haunts aren't working then try new things. You'll never know the kind of people you'll meet at concerts, house parties, BBQs, Dungeons & Dragons sessions, trivia nights at pubs, and so on. Most people do not wear an "introvert" badge.
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Gf works a shitty minimum wage CNA job in southern California, we moved from the Midwest.
Her parents are visiting next weekend, which she requested off but was denied (she never work weekends, but now that she specifically requested one off they made her work it).
I've tried to convince her to either go to college or just find a new fucking job. She doesn't seem to understand how replaceable she is in her field.
Any attempt to talk to her about it ends up in her getting stressed out and crying over it.
What do
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>>18683086
Tell her to give her boss a special "favor"
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Where the fuck do CNAs make minimum wage? You gf got low-balled, tell her to find another CNA job that pays more. She should be making ~$17 dollars an hour in SoCal.
Either way, she's retarded for not wanting to leave that shitty job. Maybe try helping her find a different CNA job for now.
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>>18683286
Boss is female.
>>18683307
Some shitty nursing home
Anonymous
does nofap actually do anything? 2017-09-02 11:28:30 Post No.18683055
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does nofap actually do anything? 2017-09-02 11:28:30 Post No.18683055
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does nofap actually do anything?
Anonymous
2017-09-02 11:28:30
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i haven't masturbated in a week i genuinely don't want to (even if nofap is bullshit) because i just feel like a loser every time i do it
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>>18683055
It saves your testosterone but you'll eventually have wet dreams bc backedup. I went nofap for a month and when i fapped, it was a HUGE load.
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>>18683065
>it saves your testosterone
Please stop perpetuating this shitty myth, it has been proven wrong countless times already. Stimulating yourself and being sexually active will actually increase testosterone production.
I feel like I'm destroying my relationships with everyone that ever cared about me. I've become reclusive and only leave home for work. I keep my phone on silent and ignore the few phone calls I get. I'm lonely but I rarely enjoy time spent with others. I don't think my friends are very interesting or funny anymore. One friend in particular I can't stand talking to and have a hard time even faking energy when I talk to him, not sure why because ive known him forever. I ignore my dad when he tries to contact me most of the time. I think I may be ashamed of myself because of the kind of person I've become but it's a paradoxical attitude that only pushes me farther into the hole. What's wrong with me? I don't know what to do. I want to care about people again. I want to feel comfortable being myself. I just want to enjoy my life again.
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You're stuck in a negative feedback loop that will only get worse with time. You need to do something to break the loop, and for that to work you need to expressly ask your friends/loved ones for help, and/or go to therapy. However both of these things are very hard to do. It's up to you in the end.
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have you considered trying nofap? it can cure these social issues
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>>18682999
Fuck, that's so embarrassing. I don't even know how I got to this point.
>>18683059
Isn't that just a meme?
Thanks for responses.
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Hey there. Theres this girl I really like shes my bestfriend and I dont know if I should tell her that i like her. She gives me mixed signs all the time like leaning her head on my chest, when she was drunk she would hold my hand, she kissed me on the cheek and lets me do the same but i feel like if she doesnt like me it could ruin our friendship u feel? what do i do?
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>>18682969
u learn pruper englesh u fel?
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>>18682994
i was typing quickly my guy
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Go for it. You'll always regret things you didn't try more than things you did try. Female 'friends' are a dime a dozen.
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Why are most people unironically interested in speaking to people they don't even know and how is this a natural and normal phenomenon? How do they derive pleasure out of this? Also I'm not referring to shitposting or discussing ideas because that's different
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>>18682962
Well, my fear of showing my social autismo keeps me from talking to people very often, but I'm definitely interested in people. I think it's cool that every single person you see has a favorite color, fruit, movie, etc. Every person has had a best day of their lives, and worst day. Every person has some great stories to tell, and I feel like you can learn something from every person, even if it's just a slightly new or different way of perceiving the world. I want to know what makes people tick, I just don't have the courage to ask
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I usually stick to myself but I've been trying to break out of my shell recently. I just had an epiphany that girls won't like me if they don't know anything about me.
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>>18682962
Good question. Just remember that you don't have to lower yourself to anyone elses level. There are plenty of not-quite-human people out there whose entire life revolves around luring naive or lonely individuals into sharing deeply meaningful or deeply painful secrets, and then using the information and wielding it as a weapon. I know one female who particularly enjoys building trust solely in order to ferret out details relating to childhood abuse and trauma, which she then weaponizes in hopes of instigating suicide. Always remember that you yourself are a willing accomplice, should you ever be unfortunate enough to encounter one of these creatures. Because the reality is that these sorts of soul-dead people DO exist.
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hi /adv/, first time poster and i dont know what to do. I started dating this girl my second semester of freshman year of college (im currently going into my first semester of junior year) and she was everything to me. long story short, she dumped me after 4 months or so (i had a lot of personal issues that ive since worked out) and at the time, i was upset for about 3 days and then i just downloaded tinder. basically a month after this first girl dumped me, i started dating this other girl i had met on tinder and i thought i was basically over that first girl, even though i wasnt as infatuated with my now girlfriend, but now, i seriously miss the first girl and since she dumped me we've talked a little bit but nothing serious. I dont want to fuck up my girlfriend because i really do care about her and its been over a year, but i still have really strong feelings for the first girl and less feelings for my girlfriend. i mean what the fuck do i do? how can i get over this old relationship that ended more than a year ago? ty
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>>18682961
I wish I had your problems, never had that sort of happiness or loss in my life. My fucking life is nothing compared to yours.
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>>18682961
Pretend your ex never existed, block her and ignore her. It wont be easy, but every other move will literally fuck your life even worse.
>You will walk away from her when she has violated your integrity, and you will let her walk when her heart is closed to you. She who can destroy you, controls you. Don’t give her that power over yourself. Love yourself before you love her.
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Roleplay with your new gf by having her wear a wig the colour and style of you're old gf's hair and calling her you're old gf's name. Chicks dig role playing.
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Basically, I am a pathetic 22 year old who for whatever reason did not have their first kiss at a normal age. After using tinder for a year, and having 5 first dates, I finally have a second date. It's tomorrow!
I should be happy about this, right?
Apparently not. I'm just super scared that she's expecting me to kiss her, and I have no fucking clue how to initiate it, or actually do it. I asked my normie friend, and she said some stuff about making sure I'm doing stuff with my hands, and said that if she's looking at my lips then it means she wants to kiss. But I still don't actually know what I'm meant to do. Like, we touch lips, and then what? I feel like I'm being stupid.
Any help guys?
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>>18682889
It honestly comes pretty naturally.
I was in a very similar boat as you, had my first 'real' kiss earlier this summer, I didn't tell her that tho but when I asked later how it went she mentioned that I was a bit strange for the first couple minutes then got better. I just blamed it on nerves/I was at an awkward angle.
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>>18682889
In my experience (had two 7 year girlfriends, dated a lot more), I had to learn to kiss every girl I began dating with. Of course, there's some general advice, like: don't close your mouth during the kiss, don't drool, move your tongue, have a good breath, etc. But, in general, you gotta practice a lot. Don't be nervous, take every opportunity as a way of learning.
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Hey guys,
I'm not quite sure what the fuck is wrong with me, but I'll explain:
Throughout my childhood I was known as a popular guy, had a pretty bombastic personality, I was generally likable, etc etc. All through elementary, middle, and 9th grade I was like this, but when I suddenly moved away my personality got completely fucked. I became a shut-in, shy mother fucker. But I could still feel this massive personality inside me, for some reason I was just unsure of myself and didn't show it.
Last year I went to my first year of college and at the beginning something odd had happened again to my personality, the big bombastic part started to leak through a bit. But as soon as I noticed this I immediately shut it back in. Now when I did this, I was desperately wanting to be more social and shit, but I was so scared I'd get judged if I let it out.
Now in my second year I'm 90% sure most people I've talked to or run into think I'm a fucking weirdo. I have literally no volume control(I talk quietly so no one hears me), I look away from people a lot as to not make eye contact, and I mostly just shut myself in my dorm room as to stay away from people. I was curious and googled this shit and it turns out these are some symptoms of social anxiety, or fucking autism. I'll go with the former.
As of last week I began trying to push myself into more social environments to try and get that personality to come out, and it's kinda working. But it turns on and off very quickly like I'm bipolar.
I just want to know how to train yourself to literally give no fucks about what people think about you. I am at such an extreme of overthinking shit and caring too much about what people think about me I feel like I need to go to the opposite extreme to fix this shit. I am actually getting a growing anger over myself being like this. I have literally no friends here, and the loneliness is starting to get to me. Pls help.
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Are you me? This is exactly my life story.
Same history, but I dont give a fuck about people solely for that reason. In the end I am always by myself, always alone. Some people might accompany me along the way, but in the end all I have is me and family, maybe.
I know the overthinking problem, it was very heavy on me, there were times when I was shaking when I merely texted a girl, but thanks to meditation, self-help literature (which is useless for me now, as every book repeats what I already know) and drug use. In the end you realise - all thoughts are futile, who fucking cares what hallucinations other peoples mind generates about you. This really does not matter.
Our perception is not real and can change very easily.
P.S: I dont want to animate you to drugs, but If the loneliness gets too heavy smoke weed. I am serious, this is the only thing that kept me sane in full loneliness during high school in a 20k town.
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>>18682879
I already smoke bro lmao
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>>18682885
Well, it should take edge off loneliness.
But actually, if you smoke already, I would suggest laying it for a bit. When I am not high for a couple of days, I become more sociable in my sober condition. More confident, too.
I arrived at the point where I consider smoking once in 3 days the optimum.
When you smoke everyday, it can mess with anxiety.