I want to destroy this body.

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>>117934892
I generally prefer Crab > Bat > Monkey but she's so delicious in pic related.

Me too man, me too.

>>117934892
Good taste anon

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proper order is
snail = bat = bee > monkey = zombie = phoenix > snake > shit > crab = cat

>>117934892
try using a big hammer or a meat grinder or something

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I want to destroy this body.

somebody please post the webm.
I need it for science.

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>>117934892
Not sure if she's a virgin or [spoilers]ebola[/spoilers]

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pls, it goes

bat > monkey > crab > inconsequential girls > shit > snake > your mom > cat

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>>117935701
Snail = Bat > Bee > Cat >Crab > Doll > Monkey > Bird > Snake > Shit > Gaen.

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>>117938680
>taking doll into account, let alone putting her above monkey
please, she doesn't even have a personality yet

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>>117939151
I don't like lesbos.

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>>117934892
I want that body to destroy me like Ararararagi.

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>>117941950

>fucking girls
gay

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>>117934892
>I want to destroy this body.
I like how you think.

>>117934892
but that's a boy

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I love snake.

>>117934892
>destroy
Are you some fratboy?

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>>117935701
Your entire list is invalid because Snake isn't at the bottom.

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>>117947522
I want to cum inside Snake and not take responsibility

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>>117934892
I want to destroy this booty

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>>117947758
>mfw didn't know this doujin existed

I'm gonna save this for later.

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>>117947842
Do NOT sexualize the snail.

Hate to break it to you but that body destroys you. Your bones will be fine powder

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>>117947952
Didn't we just have this conversation earlier

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>>117947980
You needed another reminder.

Snail is moe.

Snail is not lewd.

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>>117948066
Why not both?

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>>117948102
Snail is pure.

She wouldn't act like a common harlot.

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>>117948438
Is that so?

>>117948102
what no bus? I thought she gets hit by a very nice bus

>>117939151
Too bad she's gay like a prison inmate.

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>>117947098
a very erotic boy

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>>117948583
I would do things to this boy.

Does this make me gay?

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>>117947973
I'm okay with this.

>>117948887
What would hurt? What the hell was she planning to do?

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>>117948781
There is no gay, if it's pretty then fuck it.

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>>117948908
Jam it in

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>>117948949
It only hurts at first. You'll start to feel good soon.

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>>117948978
Why is that image flipped?

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>>117948518
Yes.

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>>117949016
I don't know, I didn't take the screencap.

It's one of the great mysteries of 4chan.

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>>117949073
I don't think I'm alright with that.

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>>117949179
Be the change you wish to see on your image board.

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>>117949272
I don't need to change. I am an ally of justice, I preach the tenets of justice and peace for all the good people everywhere. You might say I am the person who upholds the principle of equality

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>>117949369
Upholding through words only?
Where are your actions?

If you don't like a screencap you should go take your own and post it.

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Monkey-fags, do you have any images of Monkey dressed up?

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>>117949533
No ;_;

We need Suruga Court to be animated already.

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>>117949454
I do. That's totally what I do. I don't think pic related existed on the internet til I screencapped it.

Also Karen, pls. Anshin'in is more action than you could ever be. Her entire plan is to create fresh heroes

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>>117949575
I haven't ever seen any.

In fact, most pictures that have Monkey, feature her in various stages of undress.

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>>117950041
Clothes are for the weak.

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>>117948066
>bandaid on leg

I've always wondered... is there a vagina under that thing?

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>>117950041
Do casual clothes count?

>>117951453
You mean the knee pit?

Of course it is.

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>>117951547
Like, something you'd wear when going out at night, or on a date.

>>117951453
If it's like Shinobu's bandaid, then probably.

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>>117951453
This sort of logic raises some concerns

>>117935701
Shit this is pretty fucking close.
Sasuga.

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>>117951891
Well maybe if crab had given it a chance we'd have seen what it looks like.


As it is this all we have to go on.
>Kanbaru-san, wearing heels and a frilly skirt and a lacy blouse, her hair arranged with pink ribbon, and though I don’t know if it could accurately be called gothic lolita she nevertheless seemed to be wrapped up in a very gothic lolita-like fashion that seemed excessively decorated.

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>>117951960
>Close
>Snake anywhere but the bottom.

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>>117951960
Pretty close because monkey has to be ahead of bee as she is objectively the superior tomboy right?

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>>117952152
Also crab being under snake is inherently wrong since snake always defaults to last.

>>117951453
>>117951919
Oh god that is so hot

where are the bandaid doujins?

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>>117952242
SNAIL IS PURE
N
A
I
L

I
S

P
U
R
E

>>117952309
>WANTS to get molested by araragi
>pure

her band-aid pussy is itching for it

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>>117952348
You take that back.

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>>117952242
You can sexualize snail if you want but don't do it to loli monkey.

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>>117952793
Well... ..............no

>>117952953
>band-aid
she did it to herself!

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>>117952953
Traitor.

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snail is the best

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>Tfw I'll miss Tsukimonogatari, because I'll be out of town.

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>>117953165
Snail totally wants it. loli monkey is untouched by future ero pursuits and is innocence itself.

>>117951919
>>117952953
>>117954287
Does she have a broken nose?

Who could have done this travesty?

>>117935931
alright, give us the source

>>117935701
>>117935701
>>117938548
>>117938680
Crab=Monkey=Bat>Cat=Snail=Phoenix>Bee>Doll>Snake

Why do lesbians always have the best bodies in their respective shows?

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>>117954758
>>117938680
>>117938548
>>117935701
No matter how good the taste, lists are always cancer.

We just have to agree that snake is terrible and move on.

>>117955217
No. Snake was boring to start with, but she turned out fantastic.

>>117955706
She can be fantastic to watch still a shit.

>>117936466
what the fuck

>>117934892
>those bandages

I want to destroy my dick.

That monkey paw gonna rip yo dick off and take your scrotum with it

then shove it up your ass

>>117934892
Try the erase tool

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>>117954758
This is a list I can mostly agree with.

I'd probably switch Cat and Bee though.

Koimonogatari > Nekomonogatari Shiro > Otorimonogatari > Owarimonogatari > Onimonogatari > Hanamonogatari > Nekomonogatari Kuro

Which Monogatari has the most tragic story? Besides Shinobu

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>I don't know everything, I just know what I know.

>>117956080
Still worth it.

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>>117956829
Why is cat so boring?

>>117956827
Tsukihi. Not that being human is particularly special, but her being a cuckoo means her whole deal is a little fucked up. If my interpretation of how her shit works is correct, she doesn't die in a final sense, but rather has a phoenix revival thing happening, but since current Tsukihi doesn't have any memories of her past lives, that means you can pretty much effectively consider it death. Which means whatever life extension tech comes into play might not work for her correctly? Not sure how the interaction would work.

Plus she's susceptible to being forcibly changed as a being by people's perceptions of her, as all kaii are.

>>117957229
Are you dumb? Tsukihi has the easiest life.

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>>117957047
Why crab so slutty?

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>>117956827
I'm obviously a little biased, but I think it's Crab.

>>117957331
She has the worst outlook due to how she was born. Although I suppose she won't have to worry about getting hit by trucks or whatever, but the publicisation of kaii isn't addrssed very well in -monogatari.

>>117951717
Doomguy, is that you?

>>117957395
>wasn't raped
>wasn't even kissed

There are plenty of kids who have divorced parents and are poor.
Crab is beautiful and dignified and is popular at school.

She can marry a rich handsome man and have an easy life.

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>>117957349
>Teases her BOYFRIEND
>Slut

Also,

>Offers a free pass to touch her boobs whenever he wants
Yes cat, you are one to talk. You're just jealous you could never win the Araragi-bowl.

>>117957503
Just because she wasn't actually raped doesn't mean it wasn't traumatic.

>>117952110
I would like snake's bottom

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>>117957547
>implying wining the araragi bowl is worth anything

Crab is the true loser because she forfeited the Barubowl

>>117934892
> you will never spank that

why live?

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>>117957763
>Crab is the true loser because she forfeited the Barubowl
>Implying there's actually anyone even in the barubowl besides, maybe Karen.
You can't force gayness anon.

>>117957939
>Karen
>toothbrush-fucked by her brother
Confirmed straight

>>117947980
>Snail without ponytails
What a goddess. I say that and I don't even like her.

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>>117957939
You can still lose a bowl of one.

It just makes it more sad.

>>117956827
Hachikuji

>Gets hit by a car and dies trying to visit her mom
>Wanders all around for 10 years, hopelessly lost and yet still on the lookout for her dear mother's house
>Finally finds her way there thanks to Araragi
>but then the house isn't even fucking there anymore
>Finds peace anyway but continues ghosting around for a while
>Gets killed again because Ougi is a piece of shit

If none of this managed to make you cry you're a horrible human being

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>>117957503
Her mother helped a stranger attempt to rape her, which tore her mother out of her life and they lost everything to con-artists, meaning that her father is never there.

She lost like all of her friends as a result of it too. She's hardly popular anymore.

The other competitors are Snail, because she's fucking dead, and Cat because her life is fucked too.

>>117958880
All of the gatari girls have sad stories except for the fire sisters and snake. Karen was supposedly suicidal at one point? but you don't get told much about that and snake's problems are all her own fault.

Shinobu is a suicidal vampire who is sticking around for a little longer because of Koyomi. Kanbaru lost her parents, lives with her grandparents who don't particularity like her, lost her childhood friend to suicide and got passed over by her love for some hipster chuuni manlet.

>>117958880
>Cat because her life is fucked too.
was fucked*

Everything got fixed in Tsubasa Tiger

>>117957939
>any picture of Crab with Ararararagi
>Araragi's handsomeness completely overshadows anything good about crab

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>>117959394
You have it backwards anon.

>tfw out of all the girls in monogatari you like Araragi most

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only girl ever to compliment arargaris nice body.
truly the most thoughtful and loving monogatari

>>117960084
she didn't compliment his nice body

she complimented the fact that he has muscles

she wanted to literally eat these muscles

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>>117960084
Is it time for jokes?

Okay, here's one; Snake is the best.

>>117959676
>the monkey is playing with the donut
those lewd connotations

>>117959951
I agree

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>>117959951
Replace that with Kaiki and Im on board

>>117960880
oh god just look at those delicious holes

>>117960880
Why is there a smiley face on his face

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>>117960416
>Not wanting her to eat your muscles

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>>117960643

>>117961287
Welp, incoming gay. Like I said in another thread, it's weird how Shinobu acts like a little girl around the other harem members.

>>117934892
Too bad shes so BORING.

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>>117961557
she was interesting in the beginning but she turined into shafts go to girl for fan service, even arargari got tired of it.

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>>117960084
>implying

>>117947758
>my fetish is a woman speaking lovingly to me like this

W-what's wrong with me?

>>117961832
did she stick her finger up his butt?

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>>117961668
>Kanbaru teasing Araragi with lewdness
>Araragi teasing Kanbaru with incest
>boring

You can just go and fuck yourself then.

>>117961841
Nothing. Loving femdom is great.

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>>117961958
You don't know that she didn't.

His pants did come off at some point however.

>>117961998
That is the most vanilla "femdom" I have ever seen.

>>117961998
>>117962151

is that even femdom? But seriously, there are not enough doujin or hentai where the woman is in full control without them getting fucking weird or It always switches to the guy being dominate in the end and it ruins it. I think I can't count on my hand the number of times it doesn't happen.

>>117962269
I mean technically she's telling him what to do but I doubt this counts as femdom at all.

Snake is only good for maledom anyways. Crab and monkey is where all the femdom is.

>>117961841
You desire emotional intimacy.

>>117962362
> implying crab won't make a great switch

switches are the best!

>>117962900
Yeah but it counts as femdom still.
Crab would work in humiliation and orgasm denial while monkey would just head straight to the rough sex.

>>117963059
> crab doing orgasm denial this evening
> calling you names while you're at it
> makes you go to bed without cumming

> begs you to spank her next day for doing that to you

I can dig it

>>117962151
>>117962269
Never read that doujin before, or if I did I probably forgot.

>>117934892
>that spine
Looks like the artist already destroyed it for you.

>>117963133
>this makes me horny and i'm not even into femdom or crab

>>117963246
i wasn't into maledom before someone talked about it on /a/

now i tie up and spank 3DPDs all the time

i wasn't into femdom either before someone linked me to Akai Mato

i want to climb inside kanbarus butt and live there

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>>117963321

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>>117963216
>having no flexibility

How that working out for you?

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>>117963300
>now i tie up and spank 3DPDs all the time

>spanking people

Why do people do this? Why?

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>>117963399

>>117963579
It's how I get off.

I like to inflict pain on women but I don't want to put them in danger?

Plus, handprints are totally hot.

>>117963579
>why do people like dom

I don't know anon, why do you like tits?

>>117963733
the same reason I love you. I just do.

>>117963669
>It's how I get off.

So you cum while spanking people? That's the part I'm trying to understand.

I mean if a chick told me to spank her, I'd do it. But I can't imagine cumming from that.

>>117963863
It's just like any other fetish. I get them to tears and then fuck them while they're still tied or, if that was a disciplinary spanking, order them to give me a blowjob.

>>117963863
You can't cum from just that obviously, but it turns you on.

You have no idea what sadomasochism is?

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>>117963133
I'll be in my bunk...

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>>117963966
>I get them to tears and then fuck them while they're still tied or, if that was a disciplinary spanking, order them to give me a blowjob.
Now I see.

>>117964101
n-no. I still love my vanilla porn, I've done my best to not get corrupted.

I can watch futa on girl though

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>>117935701
You are pretty much right, except for
>zombie
>even counting as a girl

>there are people on /a/ who regularly have kinky sex with 3DPDs
Why are you here?

Leave

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>>117963612
Oh mon gode

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>>117964332
You should try it some time.

>>117963612
Spics please leave.

>>117964332
what if they pretend the 3DPD is 2D?

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>>117964405
>you will never listen to /mu/core with crab

>>117964332
this is /a/, not /r9k/

we have guys from the first generation here

>calling Shinobu "bat

Fucking retards she is a vampire, not a fucking animal!

>>117964605
Who are you quoting?

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>>117934892

>>117964405
How many of girls who agree to this shit aren't ugly as fuck though?

>>117964791
I would post my pictures, but it's banned on this board and I'll get banned even for linking them.

I don't have sex with anyone who is lower than 7/10.

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>>117964523
I wonder what kind of music she likes.

>>117964791
I'm sure there's tons. My chinese cartoon porn wouldn't lie to me, would it?

>>117964891
So they're just escorts?

>>117964935
N-never anon.

>>117964332
Most of them are lying. And the ones who do like me know that sex is extremely overrated.

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>>117964791
In my experience, the less attractive girls are ones who like more vanilla stuff.

It's the hottest ones who have all the kinks.

>>117965045
>not having sex with the one you love

Anime has ONE FUCKING LESSON, you spend all your time here, and YOU NEVER LEARNED

>>117965111
Obviously he hasn't been here long enough to learn.

>>117965111
>Anime has ONE FUCKING LESSON
You mean spend years going after someone and not even getting a kissu?

>>117964925
Probably quaint folk, a little bit of mellow ambient, piano suites, and some downbeat instrumental hip hop. Maybe some pop punk if she feels like it.

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>>117964405
>Senjougaharafag are 3D fucker
truly the worst persons here

>>117965111
>implying everyone finds that person

I did once, she is gone now.
Still, sex isnt my best memories of that time.

>>117965176
then you have a time skip with children from your childhood friend. Yes.

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>>117965045
It sounds like you've never had it with someone you really care about or connect with.

>>117965226
>never had it with someone you really care about or connect with
I'll have you know my waifu loves me very much.

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The greatest episode is still S1E12. Dat Kimi Ni Shiranai Monogatari.

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>Crabfags blog about their 3DPD adventures

not even snakefags are THIS bad
leave

>>117935931
FUCK
WHY DID THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN

>>117965192
You are now the adult character, you're supposed to find some young kids to pass your skills onto and die a heroic death while having a flashback of her.

Stay a hermit, when those young children come to master your skills, you'll know your time has come.

>>117965226
I did, and I still think its overrated.
I honestly enjoyed doing other things with her way more than sex.
I'm not a horny teenager, getting my dick wet isnt the only thing I live for anymore.

>>117935701
>cat last

Literally shit taste.

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This monkey thread has a surprising lack of monkey.

>>117965415
>I'm not a horny teenager, getting my dick wet isnt the only thing I live for anymore.

You sound like someone who is going to get NTR'd.

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>>117965312
I'm not the only person who cried at the end right?

>>117965455
agreed

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How did we go from this,

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>>117965415
>I'm not a horny teenager, getting my dick wet isnt the only thing I live for anymore.
I'm not either. Sexuality and compatibility in that regard, are very important.

Exploring each others sexuality is one of the best things you can do to bond with your partner.

Since we're blogging about our epic lives,

>fairly fit but completely neglect cardio
>watch Monogatari
>monkey best girl of all time
>start putting in work on the exercise bike
>slowly start running outside as well
>now, years later, easily outsprint all of my gym buds

couldn't thank Kanbaru enough for giving me this motivation

>>117965462
moot posts as anon?

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>>117965646
to this?

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>>117965468
You and me both brah

>>117965679
no, he just sounds like Anthony Burch.

His road will be the same.

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>>117957047
>ear nibbling

Oh god... How could I forget about this?

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>>117965462
>NTR'd

I don't have anyone right now so that wont happen.
Even if it did I probably wouldn't care because I have more important stuff to deal with.

>>117965334
>You are now the adult character
As much as it hurts me I cant help but agree with you.
I'm getting fucking old and my priorities have changed.

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>>117965191
No, that would be Snake-fags.

>>117965646
>>117965694
Snake, not even once.

>>117965838
Even shit taste can't hold a candle to the faggotry of 3D fuckers.

>>117965312
this and steins;gate OVA are my most favorite romantic endings ever

i cried

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>>117965468
No, it was fucking beautiful.

>>117965185
I can totally see that. Crab has good taste.

>>117965988
It left me feeling mostly empty inside.

;_;

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Stop ruining this monkey thread with your blogs.

Where the fuck is the anime? Tsuki needs to come out already and end this fucking downtime.

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>>117965661
Didnt mean to imply anything.
Its just that I always had more fun just going out with her or playing games together than having sex all the time.
Not that I hate sex or anything, and she was as attractive as it gets. Its just how I am.
Man now that I'm talking about her I'm starting to remember how perfect she was. She always acted pretty much like Crab from the first season, treating me like shit, acting cold, hitting me, calling me names...and I loved it. I'll never forgive myself for losing her, so I hope that if you have someone you really love you treat her right and dont let her go.

>>117966100
>Ruining
You can't ruin what was already shit.

>>117965455
Those were the armpits that started this bizarre fetish of mine

>>117966075
I feel you, but it's motivating, I don't want to die having not experienced something like that.

So is Tsukimono going to be the first part of Final Season?

The more crap you post here the less worse snake threads seem in comparison.

Is that the precedent you want to set?

>>117966287
You won't anyway. 3D is not 2D, man.

>>117966315
It's like one or two crabfags ruining everything

obvious crossboarding shitheads

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>>117966315
>Snake threads turn into shit
>Monkey threads turn into shit
Obviously it's time to go with Snail.

>>117966349
Not everyone is a kv neet you fag.

>m-muh secret club
>normies

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>>117966341
I'd still rather try.

>>117966315
Who are you talking to anon?

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>>117966396
>those delicious twintails
You're right

>>117966516
Enjoy your crippling disappointment, then.

>>117966487
Thanks for proving my point

now fuck off

>>117966550
Okay, enjoy nothing I guess.

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>>117966578

>>117965312
I'm a HUGE sucker for romantic animes and even I didnt think much of that episode.
I mean, 90% of it is the two talking in a car while Hitagi otousan drives the car.
Then they stop somewhere to watch the sky and confess they love when they are already dating.
Honestly didnt see anythng special.

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>>117966349

>>117966663
>I mean, 90% of it is the two talking
What were you expecting?